The difference in fantasy and reality is very stark. It is difficult the understand and possibly impossible to explain how the fantasy can be so exciting but the reality so very threatening. I think that the one thing that is often overlooked is that the act itself might not be so bad but it is the realization that the act might have been more than just physical. It is the intimacy that will tear you apart. As hurt as I was at the fact she did cheat it was the fact that she refused to explain or rationalize in just physical terms. When I had to face the fact that there was an emotional bond that she could not or would not discuss deny or walk away from I knew it was over. She did say she loved me but that she would never not love him too and I had to make a choice. I could have as much of her as she chose to give when she she chose or I could leave.I've been wanting to do this for awhile now and the husband is not wanting to even though it turns him on to talk about it. He denies that it turns him on but he gets the biggest hard ons when I bring it up.
We always start out in bed joking around and as soon as I mention this fantasy his dick goes from zero to hero.
It usually goes like this:
Me: (jokingly) you'd like it if a guy fucked me hard while you sat there and watched.
Him: no I'd be pissed.
(I reach over and he's getting hard)
Me: (I still sound like I'm joking) don't lie. You're getting hard just thinking about what a whore your wife is. The man is fucking me from behind and you get to see how much your whore wife loves being fucked.
(I've got this need to be my husband's whore. To have him own me and use me. I had never saw the appeal of being a whore with anyone else)
Him: I'd be really angry. I'd want to punch you.
(At this point he's so hard that all I would have to do is blow on it and he'd cum)
Me: you're still hard. You'd like to punish your whore. What would you do to me?
(At this point I realized that I'm actually getting excited by the possibility of doing this)
Him: I'm not getting hard because I want to watch you fuck someone else. I'm hard because you keep touching my dick.
(Lie! I've seen him go flaccid when we talk about or do something sexual he doesn't like)
Me: it wouldn't get you a little excited to watch your wife get used?
(He's so mad but he's still rock hard)
Him: maybe a little but I'd be really angry
By this point I'm so turned on by just talking about it that I don't even wait for foreplay. We just start fucking and it's a good hard one too. He usually ends up choking me or doing one of the other "special occasion" moves I love. (He's not into any BDSM so getting him to do these things for me doesn't happen often)
So here's my problem. This scenario has happened enough times that I know this is something he likes but I can't get him to admit it. He also sometimes gets this whole "you just want to cheat" pout which is not the case. It's not the actual fucking that gets me excited. It's his reaction and what he does to me after. I'm pretty sure it's the watching me get fucked that is the most exciting part to him.
To me it sounds like the perfect combination of our two fantasies. To him it sounds like I just want permission to cheat. I've tried to explain to him that who the guy is doesn't matter. He could pick someone that i wasn't physically attracted to and I'd still have the same feelings because it's him watching me and punishing me after that gets me off.
I'm not sure how to pursue this. I've kept it to just talk and haven't seriously suggested that we try it. I feel like he needs to be the one who pursues it for him to be ok with it. Like if we did it because I insisted that this was what I wanted he'll get hurt or really mad and it'll ruin an otherwise awesome marriage. Even if he enjoys it I'm sure he'll be divorce filing mad if it wasn't his idea to begin with.
So I'm stuck just reading about it on literotica until I figure out how to make this happen
For you own sake tread lightly and communicate, communicate, communicate. Good luck to you both.
