Your Worst

[CharleyH]

Time to take off your halos and get onto the confession stand.

What's the worst thing you've done in each of the following areas of your life? By 'worst' I'm talking about the uncool little things that you'd feel ashamed to own up to.

Sex Never saw the small penis again - just did not call him and I feel bad that I never called him again.

Cooking I am too good a chef and never make mistakes.

Work An excuse I used for being late once was that I was having sex. How does an employer respond? They do not- lol - and I never got fired for using it.

Friendship Pseudo-sex with friends boyfriend, not proud of it. Feel awful to this day.

Stoned / Drunken Antics I am mostly fun and can't recall - a good sign.

School Exams Aced them without study.

Rude Behaviour to Random Strangers People in grocery lines who don't get me kicking their baskets out of my way when they are still shopping. Fools!

Blonde Moments Me? LOL

Unlawful Activity I may have been bad, but never unlawful - knowingly.

So now I'm sitting back and wondering if you will respond?

 

[Dar~]

Sex
Well, aside from the obvious daydreaming about women while fucking my husband, there is the fact that although I am usually quiet when turned on I learned to talk really kinky to get my husband off faster so that sex would get over faster. Men just didn't do it for me.

Cooking
I am a really good cook, but when I get nervous, things tend to become a little more cooked than they should. So the first time I cook someone a meal they are usually un impressed

Work
I take toilet breaks so I can text my roommates.

Friendship
In Middle school a friend was constantly telling me that my mom must not care too much about me because I was never allowed to do a lot of things that she was (like being out after 10) so I told her straight up that her mom was a breeder and didn't give a damn about her and that it was obvious because she was always letting her do dangerous crap like being out at all hours, driving around with grown men and doing drugs. I lost a friend over it.

Stoned / Drunken Antics
Never been stoned but I get really self deprecating when I am drunk and I belittle myself and my intellect when I have been in my cups.

School Exams
I am a goody two shoes, the worst I've done is guess on a scantron.

Rude Behaviour to Random Strangers
When My girlfriend dumped me in December, that same day a couple of witnesses for some local baptist church decided to knock on our door and teach us the "true" bible. I screamed we're dykes, does the "true" bible have anything to say about that? and slammed the door. It was a very emotional day.

Blonde Moments
I am a livin gbreathing blonde moment. The most common are looking for my pen when it's in my hand or my glasses when they are on my head.

Unlawful Activity
Got arrested for disorderly conduct when I was 17 for trying to beat up my gigantic step dad. MAn outweighed me by 100 pounds and was almost a foot taller. I'm sure he was in an amazing amount of danger.

 

[TheeGoatPig]

Work An excuse I used for being late once was that I was having sex. How does an employer respond? They do not- lol - and I never got fired for using it.

My boss would accept that as a valid excuse as well. He would probably throw me a party for getting some...

 

[SlickTony]

An excuse I used for being late once was that I was having sex. How does an employer respond? They do not- lol - and I never got fired for using it.

When I was working at Wachovia in the encoding department, one day I was off, but on call. It was morning, and my husband and I were still in bed...having sex. And the phone rang. He picked it up and said, "She's right here." Yep, it was the encoding department, calling me to come in. When I got in, I complained to the blocker who'd called me, "You interrupted us." She just laughed.

 

[slyc_willie]

Okay, here's my take . . . .

Sex: In college, I managed to get a date with one of the hottest sorority girls on campus. Took her out, took her home, took her to bed. She was so incredibly loose and unresponsive that I actually had to fake an orgasm. Only time I ever thanked God for condoms . . . .

Cooking: I made a 3-course meal and burned two of the courses. The steaks came out med-rare and she wouldn't touch them. Only date I had with her.

Work: I screwed over a newbie server at the restaurant where I was working, telling her that, because she was new, she shouldn't take any large parties (5+guests). I ended up making over $200 that night by stealing her tables. She made about $50. She quit the following week. I was a bastard.

Friendship: That's one taboo I won't break

Stoned / Drunken Antics: I got a BJ from a guy's girlfriend . . . she thought I was him . . . .

School Exams: Nope. I've always been square there.

Rude Behaviour to Random Strangers: Told a rude guest I once waited on to 'go fuck yourself.' I'm still surprised I wasn't fired.

Blonde Moments: Um . . . like, fer shur! I'm, like, totally NOT blonde!

Unlawful Activity: Stole a car from a guy I worked with, just to get out of the state . . . copied his keys, took the car in the middle of the night . . . parked it at a bus station and called the cops from a different city. Don't know if he ever got it back.

 

[SimonBrooke]

Sex: Never saw the small penis again - just did not call him and I feel bad that I never called him again.

Sex: In college, I managed to get a date with one of the hottest sorority girls on campus. Took her out, took her home, took her to bed. She was so incredibly loose and unresponsive that I actually had to fake an orgasm. Only time I ever thanked God for condoms . . . .

Ah! So you two know each other....

 

[Vermilion]

Ah! So you two know each other....

*snerk*
Nice one Sphinxie
x
V

 

[Misty_Morning]

I remembered about this last night on the plane...I guess I had tried to block it out.


Frienship: This happened 23 years ago when I was an undergrad. I was sharing a house with 3 other girls, me and my best friends were going to college and the other two weren't. Now I loved to party (still do) but my primary concern was school.

I was very promiscuous in high school, college and most of grad school. I guess I was tryng to convince myself that the more I had sex with men, the greater the chances that my attraction to women would diminished. However I never fucked any of my friends current boyfriends. In fact I would stay away from guys that my friends were interested or had a crush on.

One day all four of us go to this pig roast out in the country at a friends farm. Big shindig. There was this guy there that I thought was really handsome and we wnded up fucking in the barn. Well, my best friend stumbled on us. After that she was really pissed at me.

Come to find out this was the guy she had had a crush on for a few months. She never told me his name and never went into details 'cuz she thought he was a little out of her league and older. I swear I didn't know.

A couple of months after that me and my roommates decided that if were going to remain friends rooming together wasn't a good idea. My best friend wanted to keep rooming with me but she still was really hurt and I just couldn't stand the guilt trip. Things kinda deteriorated. When we did see each other it was very clear she was still hurt.

Then I went off to grad school and stopped all contact because she had made a comment that I was just a slut and that she really cared about this guy and to me he was just a fuck.

A few years later my fiance hauled my ass up to Memphis and insisted that this shit stop. I think it's the only thing I can thank his sorry ass for.

We took up like there had never been a problem. I apologized she aplogized and that was it. I loved her with all my heart. She died several years ago and I really wish that she could have been here to see how much my life has changed.

On another note. Her husband was one of the last men I ever fucked and he was actually one of the best male partners I ever had. Don't worry, my friend had been dead for a couple of years. I did feel a little guilty after the first time I fucked her husband but I knew how she had felt about going on with life after losing a loved one. I'm pretty sure she knows. I hope.


I guess it's not a big thing to some folks but to me hurting a friend in unbearable.

 

[FallingToFly]

Sex- Once, a very, very long time ago, I was driving a (admittedly hot) friend home after a show we were both working at. At the time I had a Nissan 220sx, very small sports car. when we got to his place it was pouring rain so we sat there talking and finally I just looked at him and said "Would you please just fuck me and get to the point?" And then proceeded to keep checkign the clock (I was out past the curfew imposed by my husband) until he finally pulledout and said "I'd fake an orgasm, but you'd know." Went home, didn't feel the least bit guilty about it- went back about two weeks later, walked into his bedrom (his roomate let me in) and said "So, want to try that again?" The man was talented, and apparently I was having a good night, because we spent about three hours remedying the coitus interruptis of the first try. Then I turned around and introduced him to my best friend (who was going very short) and proceeded to tell them that I'd rather they fucked like mad bunnies than bemoaned their shortages to me.

Cooking- I can't cook steaks. At all.

Work- I told my boss that if he put his hand on my ass one more time I was going to put his hand into the meat slicer (I was about 16./17). Dumbass put his hands on my again, I not only kneed him in the balls but flipped the meat slicer on and shoved him into it- he only lost a couple inches (okay, maybea foot) off his braid. When HIS superior asked what happened, he said I tripped him, and I called in the other six girls who worked there to correlate that he was a nasty groping octopus. He got fired. And then I called the cops and turned him in for dealing drugs.

Friendship- I get pissed off and blow people off for a week or three at a time. Worst thing I've ever done- called up an old friend from HS who fucked me over, informed him exactly what I thought of him, then burst into tears and hung up. He still feels guilty.

Stoned / Drunken Antics I got very drunk on my 20th b-day and apparently attempted to pants my husband in front of some of my gf's.

School Exams NOT GOING HERE! *grr*

Rude Behaviour to Random Strangers- was walking past a group of guys at a college bar and one of them made a crude comment. I turned around and threw about three shots of bourbon into his face, explained to him in detail why someone who looked like me would be with a gay man and a girl rather than with him or his buddies, generally insulted his family tree, and then walked away with the audible comment of "Explain to me again why I agreed to this shit hole over (local gay bar)?"

Blonde Moments- forgot what I was doing AS I was going over a cross-country course on a green mare.

Unlawful Activity- I know where bodies are buried, and I completely agree with the reasons.

 

[slyc_willie]

Ah! So you two know each other....

LOL!!!

Ahem . . . got me there . . . .

 

[Vermilion]

LOL!!!

Ahem . . . got me there . . . .

hee hee