Your Feedback Appreciated: Gabriella Silva Ch. 2

[Nomadicwriter]

Hello all: I would greatly appreciate your suggestions and feedback on the second chapter of my memoirs. Have a wonderful evening!

https://literotica.com/s/escapes-of-gabriella-silva-ch-02

 

[Vix_Giovanni]

Congratulations on your first story!

I read chapters 1 and 2 and have just a little bit of initial feedback. I don’t have much to say about grammar, since you make it very clear that, while you’re multilingual, English isn’t your first language. Nonetheless, while it’s commendable that you’re skilled enough to write a story in your non-native language, it’s advisable that your review some basic grammar rules. No doubt you have the talent and skill to do that and then make the needed corrections.

Since your story’s a memoir, I highly recommend this post from AwkwardMD with advice about structuring and editing a story that’s based on one’s own experiences. I think it could be very helpful, especially her pointers about focusing the point of the story, and the usefulness of details. Additionally, since you mentioned you enjoy reading Literotica stories and that’s what’s drawn you to write your own escapades, I’d strongly suggest reading some of MelissaBaby’s My Fall and Rise, as a really great example of framing semi-autobiographical erotic fiction.

I hope this is helpful and wish you the best of luck with your series!