Feedback on 750 Word Story Challenge ❤️

[SpicyBean99]

I would appreciate (pretty please) some feedback on my two recent publications for the 750 word story challenge. I appreciate that some won’t be interested in reading such a short piece but I would love to receive some sort of constructive criticism and/or tips I could use to improve. This is my first time trying a challenge like this so anyyy feedback would be highly appreciated!

https://www.literotica.com/s/the-panty-thief-1

https://www.literotica.com/s/yoni-awakening

 

[AlexBailey]

Those are both great erotic flash fiction pieces. Your characters have emotional depth and have relatable life experiences, all in just 750 words.

Personally, I liked the massage story better. I found it more erotic and enticing even though I can relate to the first one more, though it might just be my own aversion to panty thieving. While I may have been a CDing little brother, stealing was always beyond the pale for me. Even so, your character’s inner conflict and feelings of shame feel real, as does his inexplicable attraction to the kink.

I get it. Good job.

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[AG31]

I would appreciate (pretty please) some feedback on my two recent publications for the 750 word story challenge. I appreciate that some won’t be interested in reading such a short piece but I would love to receive some sort of constructive criticism and/or tips I could use to improve. This is my first time trying a challenge like this so anyyy feedback would be highly appreciated!

https://www.literotica.com/s/the-panty-thief-1

https://www.literotica.com/s/yoni-awakening

I couldn't bring myself to read the panty one. I even cringe to type the word. But I'm a big fan of short erotica, so I read Yoni. Not my thing, but really well done. Keep it up! You might be interested in this thread.

I just read @AlexBailey's reply, and I agree that you do amazing things with character in 750 words, and my thread defends not attending to character.... I'll have to think on this.