unclej
a work in progress
- Joined
- Feb 22, 2002
- Posts
- 3,205
1. When you run away in the middle of a perfectly good leg humping.
2. Blaming your farts on me...not funny buba...
3. Yelling at me for barking...I'M A FRIGGIN' DOG FOR CHRIST'S SAKE.
4. How you naively believe that the stupid assed cat isn't all over everything while you're gone. (have you noticed that your toothbrush tastes a little like cat but.)
5. Taking me for a walk and not letting me check shit out...you think i'm doin' this for my friggin' health?
6. Any trick that includes balancing food on my nose...stop it..
7. Yelling at me for rubbing my ass on your carpet...what the hell'd ya buy the carpet for anyway?
8. Getting upset when i sniff the crotch of your guest...sorry asshole, i haven't quite mastered the fuckin' handshake thingy yet. (idiot)
9. How you act disgusted when i lick myself..look, we both know the truth..you're just jealous.
10. Dog sweaters...have you noticed all this fuckin' fur you inbecile?
11. Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons. now you know why we chew all your shit up when you're not home sherlock.
12. When you pick up the crap piles out in the yard. do you have any friggin' idea how far behind that puts me...do you?
13. Taking me to the vet for "the big snip" and then acting all surprised when i freak out every time we go back.
14. Invisible fences..why do you keep insisting on fucking with us..we really haven't solved the problem of the visible fence yet you dipwad.
15. The sleight of hand, fake fetch throw. congratulations...you fooled a dog! what a proud moment for the top of the food chain you fuckin' nitwit.
2. Blaming your farts on me...not funny buba...
3. Yelling at me for barking...I'M A FRIGGIN' DOG FOR CHRIST'S SAKE.
4. How you naively believe that the stupid assed cat isn't all over everything while you're gone. (have you noticed that your toothbrush tastes a little like cat but.)
5. Taking me for a walk and not letting me check shit out...you think i'm doin' this for my friggin' health?
6. Any trick that includes balancing food on my nose...stop it..
7. Yelling at me for rubbing my ass on your carpet...what the hell'd ya buy the carpet for anyway?
8. Getting upset when i sniff the crotch of your guest...sorry asshole, i haven't quite mastered the fuckin' handshake thingy yet. (idiot)
9. How you act disgusted when i lick myself..look, we both know the truth..you're just jealous.
10. Dog sweaters...have you noticed all this fuckin' fur you inbecile?
11. Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons. now you know why we chew all your shit up when you're not home sherlock.
12. When you pick up the crap piles out in the yard. do you have any friggin' idea how far behind that puts me...do you?
13. Taking me to the vet for "the big snip" and then acting all surprised when i freak out every time we go back.
14. Invisible fences..why do you keep insisting on fucking with us..we really haven't solved the problem of the visible fence yet you dipwad.
15. The sleight of hand, fake fetch throw. congratulations...you fooled a dog! what a proud moment for the top of the food chain you fuckin' nitwit.
