You have the most beautiful ...

[Typo Fu Master]

... boobs. Odds are good if you give a compliment like that you'll get anything from an icy stare to a sharp slap across the face. But saying that about any body part except for butts and possibly legs is ok. Why is that? Is it possible to admire body parts that are traditionally associated with sex without being lewd or overtly sexual about it?

 

[fire_breeze]

Bah, double post!

 

[fire_breeze]

... boobs. Odds are good if you give a compliment like that you'll get anything from an icy stare to a sharp slap across the face. But saying that about any body part except for butts and possibly legs is ok. Why is that? Is it possible to admire body parts that are traditionally associated with sex without being lewd or overtly sexual about it?

Yes. There is. It's the way it's being said.

If some random guy said, "You have a gorgeous *insert body part here*", then he will cringe and shrivel from the look I will give him . However, if he said, politely, differentially, "I just want to say you're very pretty" or "Excuse me, but I couldn't help but notice how incredible your posture is" and leaves it at that, then it's acceptable, at least to me. In fact, I will thank him for the compliment and will probably bring it up to whomever I will be talking to later. Even a "thank you for the privilege of seeing a beautiful woman" can brighten a woman's day.

Bottom line, she's a person, not a hunk of meat. You're complimenting on her, and not her curves. Leave "Nice rump" at the butcher's.

However, if my partner says "hot ass", well, that's entirely different!

Just my 0.02 cents.

 

[Eilan]

If someone came up to me and said I had beautiful breasts, I'd probably be flattered, but mostly I'd wonder what the fuck he (she?) was smoking!

A good friend of mine is well-endowed in the chestal region, and she often has issues with men looking at her breasts while talking to her. On several occasions, she's squatted/bent down so that she's eye-to-eye with them. They usually get the point.

 

[silverwhisper]

TFM: even if she does have particularly nice breasts, complimenting any sexualized body part is a bad idea unless you're already in a relationship of some kind, i've always thought. it's the sexualized body parts that are fraught with trouble here.

look at it this way: if your mother/wife/daughter was somewhere and some strange guy said "hey, nice [body part]", what things would piss you off/have the speaker swallowing teeth?

ed

 

[Eilan]

if your mother/wife/daughter was somewhere and some strange guy said "hey, nice [body part]", what things would piss you off/have the speaker swallowing teeth?

That would depend on the guy, though. Some men find it beyond hot if someone checks out or compliments their SO's, unless, of course they cross that line from appreciative to creepy.** Moms and daughters, not so much, unless they're fans of the Incest is Best thread.

All joking from my previous post aside, I'd probably feel skeeved out by a random strange man complimenting me on pretty much any aspect of my appearance. It's possible to be appreciative without leering.


**For me, this is one of those "I can't explain it but I know it when I see it" kinds of things.

 

[Typo Fu Master]

I think it's a rare guy that could show appreciation for a woman's breasts or ass and manage to compliment her in such a way that would leave her pleased and not pissed. I wonder if other countries have this problem. America can be so ... uptight about things.

TFM: even if she does have particularly nice breasts, complimenting any sexualized body part is a bad idea unless you're already in a relationship of some kind, i've always thought. it's the sexualized body parts that are fraught with trouble here.

look at it this way: if your mother/wife/daughter was somewhere and some strange guy said "hey, nice [body part]", what things would piss you off/have the speaker swallowing teeth?

ed

He'd have to be quite the charmer, and his phrasing and attitude would have to be genuinely complimentary and not in any way lecherous before he'd even have a shot at it. Frankly, I don't see it happening. If I had a daughter (or wife) it's highly unlikely anything he said would sway me from my suspicions.

 

[Quoll]

You might get away with:
"You have beautiful eyes,"
"You have lovely high cheekbones."
"What gorgeous hair you have."
"Your neck is extremely nice."
"You have very delicate fingers."
Depending on the circumstances.

Of course she might also be thinking...

"You have beautiful eyes," "That you want to see your cock I suppose."

"You have lovely high cheekbones." That you'd love to see your cock pushing out from the inside huh!."

"What gorgeous hair you have.""Especially if it is wrapped around your cock hmm."

"Your neck is extremely nice.""Let me guess, you'd like to fill it with your cock, right."

"You have very delicate fingers.""Which would look great stroking your cock I'll bet."

"Don't you dare mention my lips or eew feet."

Or not.

 

[wicked woman]

You might get away with:
"You have beautiful eyes,"
"You have lovely high cheekbones."
"What gorgeous hair you have."
"Your neck is extremely nice."
"You have very delicate fingers."
Depending on the circumstances.

Of course she might also be thinking...

"You have beautiful eyes," "That you want to see your cock I suppose."

"You have lovely high cheekbones." That you'd love to see your cock pushing out from the inside huh!."

"What gorgeous hair you have.""Especially if it is wrapped around your cock hmm."

"Your neck is extremely nice.""Let me guess, you'd like to fill it with your cock, right."

"You have very delicate fingers.""Which would look great stroking your cock I'll bet."

"Don't you dare mention my lips or eew feet."

Or not.

Quoll there are some women, for the right man, that will offer those thoughts out loud.

thanks for the laughs.

 

[Cathleen]

You might get away with:
"You have beautiful eyes,"
"You have lovely high cheekbones."
"What gorgeous hair you have."
"Your neck is extremely nice."
"You have very delicate fingers."
Depending on the circumstances.

Of course she might also be thinking...

"You have beautiful eyes," "That you want to see your cock I suppose."

"You have lovely high cheekbones." That you'd love to see your cock pushing out from the inside huh!."

"What gorgeous hair you have.""Especially if it is wrapped around your cock hmm."

"Your neck is extremely nice.""Let me guess, you'd like to fill it with your cock, right."

"You have very delicate fingers.""Which would look great stroking your cock I'll bet."

"Don't you dare mention my lips or eew feet."

Or not.

Oh if ever there was a need for a spew alert.

Qman, are you having cock envy today?



Typo, I think "You're lovely" might be best, it's just one of those things.

 

[fgarvb1]

I like "Nice jeans". When I see good looking woman with a fine body wearing a pair of painted on jeans.

Especially if she is bent over.

I got chewed out by an outraged sister-in-law one day for noticing a "pair".

I said "Hell woman I'm married not dead!"

( I could have said "Nice ass!")

 

[Quoll]

Quoll there are some women, for the right man, that will offer those thoughts out loud.

thanks for the laughs.

Be still my beating heart.

Although I still contend that my scenario is most likely in the event of a random meeting.

Oh if ever there was a need for a spew alert.

Qman, are you having cock envy today?



Typo, I think "You're lovely" might be best, it's just one of those things.

More a case of cock pity Miss Cate, in my travels I've had the dis (but nonetheless humorous) pleasure to work with quite a few, shall we say 'dicks'. Men who have had the extraordinary ability to find an inordinate number of lesbians* in any given area.

*Apparently any women that wouldn't sleep with said 'dicks' was quite plainly a rampant lesbian.

 

[Cathleen]

Be still my beating heart.

Although I still contend that my scenario is most likely in the event of a random meeting.



More a case of cock pity Miss Cate, in my travels I've had the dis (but nonetheless humorous) pleasure to work with quite a few, shall we say 'dicks'. Men who have had the extraordinary ability to find an inordinate number of lesbians* in any given area.

*Apparently any women that wouldn't sleep with said 'dicks' was quite plainly a rampant lesbian.

Ah, the afflicted men, I figure their dick is the size of their brain, no matter what they call which. They're for entertainment purposes, they just don't know it.

 

[Mac98]

I agree with TFM in some ways. Granted, there's a way of saying it, but just because some is complimenting on your nice breasts, or bottom or any other part of your body doesn't mean he absolutely wants you to sleep with him... at least not me. I agree that there's a way of saying it... saying "You have a fucken hot ass" is probably not the way to go, but subtly pointing it out shouldn't be a bad thing. Heck, if I were a woman, I'd be flattered to be complimented like that... given the circumstances though, if a guy came up to me and said that, I'd probably be more uncomfortable than anything else... but I'd probably still thank him.

Here's a thought: Is it better, worse or as bad if a woman compliments a guy?

 

[Typo Fu Master]

Here's a thought: Is it better, worse or as bad if a woman compliments a guy?

I was getting ready to head down this road ... you beat me to it.

I don't necessarily think it's "better" so much as different. Whereas a woman will probably be offended, a guy is likely to appreciate it, though he'll think she's coming on to him just the same.

What I'm getting out of this, is that there are parts of our anatomy that are forever irrevocably tied to sexual innuendo if they're called attention to. It's virtually impossible to offer an honest compliment without being mistaken for a horn dog. At least in this culture, anyway.

 

[Cathleen]

I agree with TFM in some ways. Granted, there's a way of saying it, but just because some is complimenting on your nice breasts, or bottom or any other part of your body doesn't mean he absolutely wants you to sleep with him...at least not me. I agree that there's a way of saying it... saying "You have a fucken hot ass" is probably not the way to go, but subtly pointing it out shouldn't be a bad thing. Heck, if I were a woman, I'd be flattered to be complimented like that... given the circumstances though, if a guy came up to me and said that, I'd probably be more uncomfortable than anything else... but I'd probably still thank him.

Here's a thought: Is it better, worse or as bad if a woman compliments a guy?

My response had/has nothing to due with sleeping with the man. I don't, nor know many woman, who'd jump into bed on the bases of a compliment. Just on the face of an intended compliment, I still think less is more...especially if you equate the compliment leading to sex.

I was getting ready to head down this road ... you beat me to it.

I don't necessarily think it's "better" so much as different. Whereas a woman will probably be offended, a guy is likely to appreciate it, though he'll think she's coming on to him just the same.

What I'm getting out of this, is that there are parts of our anatomy that are forever irrevocably tied to sexual innuendo if they're called attention to. It's virtually impossible to offer an honest compliment without being mistaken for a horn dog. At least in this culture, anyway.

For me lots of these things come down to the wonderfully frustrating differences between men and women and how we communicate, what we hear and most importantly how we process what's said, it's enticing for sure -- maddeningly so. It's the hook, and IMHO, it was on the blueprints.

 

[shiny5437]

As a rule of thumb, with people who I don't know super well I try and keep the compliments to things that they have some degree of control over. So things like clothes, hair, jewellery are fair game, but body bits generally not.

Then again it is a fairly slim line between flirt and sleeze which I generally steer well clear of.

And I totally agree the posture compliment - good posture is really hot!

 

[CristinaRobo]

This was an enormously funny post.....shall I send you the carpet cleaning bill or will you be over to clean the coffee stain in person?

You might get away with:
"You have beautiful eyes,"
"You have lovely high cheekbones."
"What gorgeous hair you have."
"Your neck is extremely nice."
"You have very delicate fingers."
Depending on the circumstances.

Of course she might also be thinking...

"You have beautiful eyes," "That you want to see your cock I suppose."

"You have lovely high cheekbones." That you'd love to see your cock pushing out from the inside huh!."

"What gorgeous hair you have.""Especially if it is wrapped around your cock hmm."

"Your neck is extremely nice.""Let me guess, you'd like to fill it with your cock, right."

"You have very delicate fingers.""Which would look great stroking your cock I'll bet."

"Don't you dare mention my lips or eew feet."

Or not.

 

[VelvetDarkness]

I think the issue here is one of context. Men just don't go around complimenting random tits or ass unless they're trying to get laid. Even if it was said totally without agenda, the woman is going to infer one simply because the odds of their being no agenda are ludicrously slim. You would have to be Brad Pitt and a graduate of Charm School for Guys before you had a hope of pulling it off without arousing 'ulterior motive' suspicions. At best, it sounds like a cheap, generic chat up line. At worst, it sounds lecherous and creepy.

Sorry TFM but I think the rest of guykind is working against you here. Us poor, cynical, jaded bitches are just too damn prejudiced by the rest of your gender.

 

[water_side]

"Don't mention the boobs, I mentioned them once but I think I got away with it."

I was talking to a female friend of mine whilst waiting for a stand-up comedy show to begin and I found myself being distracted by her boobs (she wore a very low cut top). Without any concious intent, I blurted out "Nice cleavage by the way." As soon as I said it I wished a hole would open in the ground and swallow me up. Fortunately She pushed her chest out, smiled sweetly and said "Thank you." Our conversation then continued as before.

We were both sober, so it wasn't the drink talking and although the origin of my comment was obviously sexual, it was spoken (and apparently taken) in the same way as if I had said "Nice earrings by the way." In answer to your question; yes, it is possible, but I wouldn't risk doing it again

 

[shiny5437]

Good point water_side. If a lady wears clothes that are deliberately designed to make her boobs prominent and look good then surely they would be fair game for a compliment. If a woman didn't want them noticing then she would wear something more demure.

Ladies, feel free to correct my man-brain logic here.

 

[CristinaRobo]

Good point water_side. If a lady wears clothes that are deliberately designed to make her boobs prominent and look good then surely they would be fair game for a compliment. If a woman didn't want them noticing then she would wear something more demure.

Ladies, feel free to correct my man-brain logic here.

No correction needed from my perspective.

 

[ManLooking]

Bottom line, she's a person, not a hunk of meat. You're complimenting on her, and not her curves. Leave "Nice rump" at the butcher's.

zing! that was funny...

 

[ManLooking]

Good point water_side. If a lady wears clothes that are deliberately designed to make her boobs prominent and look good then surely they would be fair game for a compliment. If a woman didn't want them noticing then she would wear something more demure.

Ladies, feel free to correct my man-brain logic here.

with all due respect to the opinions of yourself and Christina, I disagree. I understand the sentiment and just maybe the setting and circumstances make a difference, but i would not want to think we are suggesting or promoting the "She was asking for it", theory, a problematic idea for sure!

In my world, a man would be very hesitant, in almost every situation, to comment in any way on the sex appeal of a woman. What makes it appropriate? just because she is flaunting her wares? Social constraints would dictate that this is very inappropriate. Then again, how appropriate is it for a woman to dress is such a provocative manner, which is very distracting? maybe if your at a night club... maybe!

A woman should be able to dress the way she wants without feeling like she has opened the door sexual comments from strangers - cleavage is not an invitation to cross boundaries. It is rarely, if ever, appropriate for a stranger to comment on the general looks or appearance of an unknown woman, let alone on her sexual appeal!

In many countries, a woman who shows her hair in public is considered as loose as a prostitute, and is "asking" for whatever she gets... of course we don't agree with this... right?

as much as i appreciate the eye candy, i do also appreciate a woman who demonstrates a modicum of decorum, because, as i mentioned, it is very distracting, and try as one may it is impossible not to look!

On the other hand, a woman needs to remember that when she fishes with a net, she may catch the fish she wants, but she also nets every other creature in her path!

 

[CristinaRobo]

Very good points ManLooking...I think maybe my opinion may have been influenced by one of the previous posts where he had mentioned that he had been talking to "a friend." In that case where there is already a certain familiarity, a comment made might not seem so lecherous. Inflection and tone of voice also come into play. There might be a fine line between an off the cuff statement that is taken with a good chuckle, and one made with the strict intent of feeding his lurid imagination and getting into her pants.