You absolute...

[EctoJohn]

You absolute shampoo masquerading as pudding.

 

[Taegul]

You absolute sleeping pill.

 

[EctoJohn]

You absolute nail in the grass.

 

[PandaLover00]

You Absolute Metric unit of measurement!

 

[EctoJohn]

You absolute V8 Engine in a canoe.

 

[barefootgirl69]

You absolute dead battery

 

[Unquoted]

You absolute stopped clock.

 

[EctoJohn]

You absolute measure of miles in Europe.

 

[Maveryk]

You absolute stick of unsalted butter.

 

[Zumbamami_69]

You absolute burr in everyone's saddle.

 

[EctoJohn]

You absolute low grade egg salad.

 

[barefootgirl69]

You absolute banjo

 

[Orwellian69]

You absolute Cold/chest infection/whatever that simply refuses to die

 

[EctoJohn]

You absolute low dice roll.

 

[Taegul]

You absolute used Andre The Giant jock strap.

 

[EctoJohn]

You absolute soiled napkin in a new bunch.

 

[Adrian81]

You absolute spunkbucket

 

[Taegul]

You absolute swamp puppy.

 

[EctoJohn]

You absolute broken ladder.

 

[Adrian81]

You absolute papercut

 

[EctoJohn]

You absolute fart under a blanket.

 

[cheekygirl75]

You absolute hangnail

 

[MissSNG]

You absolute soggy waffle

 

[Trubbycat]

You absolute dog poop in a rainy yard

 

[EctoJohn]

You absolute spoiled milk.