X-mas lonelyhearts support thread 2004

[Guest]

This thread is for those pathetic people who, like me, will spend this Christmas period alone.

Rules:

- in order to post in this thread you have to confess how many times you masturbated this December so far.
- your real life - relationship-wise - really, really, really have to suck like mine.
- we cannot mention anything relating to X-mas at all.
- other than that, just post away (or just lurk: i.e. masturbate but don't confess).

 

[Guest]

Oh, wait! I've got a girlfriend, now!

The end of the thread.

 

[Guest]

Well, TFFT! I was starting to feel edgy.

 

[carsonshepherd]

Thank god that's over... it was bumming me out.

(But really - my life sucks and I do have a partner. So there.)

edited to add, you keep track of how many times you masturbated?

 

[Guest]

This thread is for those pathetic people who, like me, will spend this Christmas period alone.

Rules:

- in order to post in this thread you have to confess how many times you masturbated this December so far.
- your real life - relationship-wise - really, really, really have to suck like mine.
- we cannot mention anything relating to X-mas at all.
- other than that, just post away (or just lurk: i.e. masturbate but don't confess).

atleast once a day if not more

it doesnt but the distance does

cant wait for xmas... but i didnt mention it, that was your imagination run amuck

i will not confess to masturbation while lurking on this thread...im not remotely turned on .....YET. well, maybe i am but im not tellin.

 

[Guest]

my life sucks and I do have a partner.

But you like the sucking bit, carson.

 

[NoJo]

38.3 times (don't you just hate it when the doorbell rings)

Just found out what "ice docking is". That does it: It's vanilla for me from now on.

 

[Guest]

Merry Christmas, CV. Sorry. Wish you could make it to W. Yorkshire.

sucky, sucky,

Perdita

 

[Guest]

Just found out what "ice docking is".

Does this involve ice cube(s)?

I've got those.

 

[shereads]

Welcome back to the AH, CV.

I'm glad you like the girlfriend we hired. These escort services are not cheap. We couldn't have done it if the General Board and Chyoo hadn't pitched in.

Merry Christmas.

S

 

[OhMissScarlett]

I haven't even masturbated very much this month, I always have the urge to, but I'm just too tired. Pathetic, I know.

For the first time in awhile, my relationship doesn't suck, but I keep waiting for that to wear off.

More often than not, I feel alone in house full of people and I wish I were someplace else.

Love ya, CV, hope you get your holly jollies somewhere.

 

[Virtual_Burlesque]

. . . in order to post in this thread you have to confess how many times you masturbated this December so far. . .

I'm impressed, CV.

I never knew you could count that high.

 

[Guest]

I'm impressed, CV.

Yeah, I know.

I'm Misspelling.

 

[Guest]

Welcome back to the AH, CV.

I'm glad you like the girlfriend we hired. These escort services are not cheap. We couldn't have done it if the General Board and Chyoo hadn't pitched in.

Merry Christmas.

S

Are you calling my fiancee a whore?

 

[Virtual_Burlesque]

Are you calling my fiancee a whore?

Of course not!

Just financially motivatred.

 

[Guest]

Of course not!

Just financially motivatred.

Catch101/Room22

Bye

 

[carsonshepherd]

Just found out what "ice docking is". That does it: It's vanilla for me from now on.

I'm strictly vanilla, all the way.

Uh... what is it?

 

[carsonshepherd]

I haven't even masturbated very much this month, I always have the urge to, but I'm just too tired. Pathetic, I know.

---Yep. It is. Join the club.

For the first time in awhile, my relationship doesn't suck, but I keep waiting for that to wear off.

---I'm sure he'll screw it up soon, don't worry.

More often than not, I feel alone in house full of people and I wish I were someplace else.

---If my house contains more than two people and three dogs, I always want to be somewhere else. Can I come over to your house?

Love ya, CV, hope you get your holly jollies somewhere.

 

[shereads]

Are you calling my fiancee a whore?

If you're wondering what to call her, the person to ask is your grandmother who runs the escort service.

 

[doormouse]

Oh, wait! I've got a girlfriend, now!

The end of the thread.

boxofrocks will be devastated

 

[boxofrocks]

Does this involve ice cube(s)?

I've got those.

I like ice cubes

 

[Lucifer_Carroll]

Let's see here. I'll be single again on Christmas for the let's see now...EVER! Though this year thankfully, I'm not having a girl dump me right before Christmas (happened twice so far). Plus, I'm coming off the single most soul-draining pre-Christmas relatives visit ever. The only thing that will even remotely save this season is that I'll be spending Christmas day and Eve with my folks and I expect to enlist at least one squeal from me mum when she sees what I got her.

And I've masturbated about X amount of times where X is a number increasing at a rate inversely related to the level of temptation I feel to get plastered until February. Thus X currently is approaching infinity.

And fuck your rules vodkaboy. I mentioned Christmas in a spiteful fury which should damn well be close enough.

 

[alyxen]

Lets see..it's been just over a month since my (for lack of a better way to word it) at some point to be ex-wife came out to me. Friday will be spent at my at some point to be ex-inlaws for Xmas...Saturday will be spent at my sisters for Xmas with my brother and grandmother visiting (neither of whom I have spoken to about the impending divorce or reason for).


Sooo basically, I can't wait for the 'holidays' to be over with.

 

[Guest]

Oh My Fucking doG!

sdrawkcab elgooG rieht teg esenihC
New Scientist (December 18)

* * * * *

All right, you - pathetic - losers! Keep the anti-Xmas spirits up!

For those of you who lives on the right side of the Atlantic, 'Don't you just get fed up with David Blancket stories? Give him a break, I say. The man was made (led?) blind by the lust!' (OK, maybe this joke had already been made, but I don't read the tabloids, so I claim my coming up with it originally.)

Now, Iraq. Let's ignore it. I mean, the most of the regular readers of my posts know how I feel about it. And I respect your position even though I may not agree with you. (For the lurkers: if you aren't gonna say anything, you are no use to me, so move on.) Shame the bomb missed Tony yesterday. I mean, what's the point of reading about the war? You only get pessimistic, and logically thinking, what's the fucking point of being a pessimist? Right? So I quit the 'Pessimism'. I mean, you don't want a pessimist around you, would you. I wouldn't. Then again, the Positivism is a bit rubbish too. Heh.

£20 million Irish, er? Provo-IRA? Who cares. No one got physically hurt. The bank will claim insurance, etc.etc. (the peace-talk is fucked anyway, unless that old git joins Arafat.

Speaking of fucking banks, what's up with non-free-to-use- cash machines?

Did you read about 'mirror system' in our brains? (The Guardian, Tim Radford, Dec 22 2004) As a former athlete, I understand well what Radford writes, but I also think it aplies to writing as well. So, this is a good place to print this:

http://english.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=177288

And orange star-of-David for Palestinian symbol. Holocaust is such fun.

Good doG! Darfur is getting worse!

Well, the Chinese gov. is at it again. A half a dozen intellectuals jailed. Does everyone know about the Chinese Muslims fighting Ji'had for ages? Or care?

According to Paul Flynn, 'Z-listers are the new A-listers as fame is democratised'. Well, I don't recognise the most of the listed names. I think it's a good thing (i.e. I turned off TV for at least 15 minuts x the number of the names on the list).

Ten million bucks for 'Iraqi women's democracy initiative'. The money will go mainly to organisations embedded with the US administration, such as the Indipendent Women's Forum (IWF) founded by Lynn Cheney. Them con-artists are surely taking the piss.

3G phones place people to within meters, making it possible to follow people round their houses simply by accessing the data kept by the service provider. Think twice, folks.

Donald Rummy the punchbag: a plesant thought.

And finally, the cheating Greek sprinters were banned. Don't you ever wonder how come Kelly Holmes beat Maria Matrola(sp) in the Olympics at the ripe age of 34? Hmmm.

See? My life is so pathetically uninteresting that I have to read the papers!

Neatly fitted onto an A4 paper . . .

 

[Guest]

CV, you are now my fave columnist. I skip all the pol threads here, but you I'd read to find out what's really going on. Plus you have real wit (you and maybe two others I read here).

Seriously, Perdita