Writing exercise - Minimalism

[Guest]

Re: Equus

Blank screen.
Blank stare.
Hands like hooves.
uncatchable flutterby thoughts.
Press hard on 'Delete'.

Big grin here. Brilliant.

Perdita

 

[impressive]

Is this not how poetry is born? Minimalistic prose?

--------------------

Crowded, noisy bar.
Jostled into one another.
Intoxicating proximity.
Eye contact.
Recognition of shared passion.

 

[oggbashan]

Wind reveals slim bronzed legs.
Hand itches to caress.
She turns, offering all.
We are in love.

 

[NoJo]

I think it's time everybody took out a book of Basho's poems from the library, and met back here later.

Joe
edited to add

Didn't work
Where's that line?
It must be so simple once it is understood .

A beautiful accidental peom by hmmnmm , who was trying to figure out how to use vBcode.

 

[TheEarl]

Re: Equus

Blank screen.
Blank stare.
Hands like hooves.
uncatchable flutterby thoughts.
Press hard on 'Delete'.

Loved this. Captured the moment perfectly.

I agree with impressive actually. It was my first thought when reading through everyone's posts - This is poetry.

I've always sucked at poetry, but this is an interesting technique to get your head around.

The Earl

 

[oggbashan]

Fifty word fiction

I have posted these before.

The idea is to write a Lit story in only fifty words (not including a one word title).

If you want to post them, you either have to write a collection of at least 15 of them to reach the minimum 750 words or post as 'Poetry'.

FIFTY WORD FANTASIES

Facesit
I struggle vainly, bound by her bra and pantyhose. She straddles
my legs, slides up my body. White panties flash, her grey skirt
covers me in scented darkness. Warm damp cotton brushes my nose, covers mouth. Her legs wrap my head, pulling my face deep. "Pay rise now!" she insists.

*************************************************

Femdom
Her black-booted foot pressed my chest. Cautiously I looked up her leather-corseted body to the stern face. I winced as the lash trailed across my shuddering skin. "Beg forgiveness, slave!" she ordered. Helpless, I cringed as she frowned at my bound body. Then she winked. The pantomine rehearsal was going well.

*************************************************

HOM
I slept in our tent cocooned in my sleeping bag. My wife's body
slammed across my shoulders, pinning me helpless. Her
black-gloved hand wrapped my mouth silent. Silk-clad fingers
clamped my nostrils tight. "Look at that bitch again," she hissed
"and you stop breathing forever." Breath-starved, I lose
consciousness again.

*************************************************

Scarfing
Her interesting neighbour was noisily drunk every Saturday. She
acted. She opened her door, pulled in, pushed him in her deep
settee. He reached out. She scarfed his wrists. He protested. She
scarfed his mouth, tied legs. She stripped him slowly and scarfed
tightly. Now he is interested in her.

*************************************************

Unbirth
She grimaced with effort as his shoulders followed legs and hips
inside her. She paused, looking at his head protruding from her
sex. Eyes pleaded above covered mouth. She braced for the final
pull. "Next time, pay my alimony on time or you will stay
inside." Some ex-wives are vindictive.

**************************************************

And a new one:

Incest
My sister wanted my car. I refused. She straddled me. Despite myself I was erect. As we struggled she felt, gasped, reached and covered. Helpless under her I groaned as she engulfed. Wracked with guilt and desire I came into my sibling's warm depths. She took my virginity and car keys.

 

[BlackShanglan]

Nice one, Gauche. But perhaps I'm biased. I liked the "hooves" metaphor.

(Seriously, I did. It catches the weight and clumsy frustration perfectly.)

Shanglan

 

[gauchecritic]

Honestly, it was direct inspiration.

Oh, sod it.

Sorry, didn't like what I posted.

I'm having one of those nights where everything I've ever written looks like garbage.

Fit of despair, or moment of lucidity? Anyone's guess.

Shanglan

 

[BlackShanglan]

You know, I wondered that for a moment, but then thought it was merely the roar of my monstrous ego.

You caught it nicely. Well done.

Shanglan

 

[BlackShanglan]

Wired whiskers and a great black nose
Take the treat and set it gently down.
Head pressed silent, warm against me,
Closing eyes. Sigh. Good.



She just did this. Put the treat on the floor and just nuzzled me. A good dog is a goodness beyond all other things.

Shanglan

 

[TheEarl]

Come home.
Drop bag just inside door.
Run hands through hair and sigh.
Trudge to kitchen.
Open fridge and hold beer to cheek.
Flick of the wrist to send the cap flying.
Slump into chair.

Not sure that one's any good, but thought I'd leave it there to see if I inspire anyone else.

The Earl

 

[Guest]

Come home.
Drop bag just inside door.
Run hands through hair and sigh.
Trudge to kitchen.
Open fridge and hold beer to cheek.
Flick of the wrist to send the cap flying.
Slump into chair.

Excellent, each word necessary, whole picture and mood captured.

Pear

 

[BlackShanglan]

Oh, sod it.

Sorry, didn't like what I posted.

I'm having one of those nights where everything I've ever written looks like garbage.

Fit of despair, or moment of lucidity? Anyone's guess.

Shanglan

So.

Much.

Better.



Bliss.