Would this be offensive?

[Boxlicker101]

I am writing a story about lesbians, and I want to know if thes sentences would be offensive to anybody"

Jessica was a femme, or lipstick lesbian. She and a few others hung out at the bar looking to be picked up by other women, usually older, who would take the masculine roles during their sexual romps.

 

[elsol]

Yes.

(just kidding...)

 

[Liar]

Can't say, since I'm not sure exactly sure what being a femme means. If it's accurate, then I guess not.

But generally speaking, the passage is a little offensive to me as an erotica reader. Blurting out labels in nararation like that makes for pretty unsexy reading, if you ask me. Show, don't tell, and all that.

 

[Powertone]

lipstick lesbian.

and she looks like Sarah Palin,right?!

 

[matriarch]

I am writing a story about lesbians, and I want to know if thes sentences would be offensive to anybody"

Jessica was a femme, or lipstick lesbian. She and a few others hung out at the bar looking to be picked up by other women, usually older, who would take the masculine roles during their sexual romps.

As a very open minded lesbian, I don't care how they view themselves, but as a reader, I would have no desire to read any further after that sentence. I'm not offended, just bored with narrow stereotypes.

 

[3113]

I am writing a story about lesbians, and I want to know if thes sentences would be offensive to anybody"

Jessica was a femme, or lipstick lesbian. She and a few others hung out at the bar looking to be picked up by other women, usually older, who would take the masculine roles during their sexual romps.

Speaking as one writer to another--and granted I'm not in the intimate know on the topic--I'm guessing that "masculine role" will jar the reader. I mean, that's the way you, as a heterosexual male sees it it, but I don't think lesbians would think of it that way and the story is from their point of view.

 

[Safe_Bet]

I am writing a story about lesbians, and I want to know if thes sentences would be offensive to anybody"

Jessica was a femme, or lipstick lesbian. She and a few others hung out at the bar looking to be picked up by other women, usually older, who would take the masculine roles during their sexual romps.

I don't have any major problems with it, except it isn't really accurate.

There IS a difference between a "femme" lesbian and a "lipstick" lesbian however, but it is a matter of degrees; both are on the more feminine side of the spectrum:

Lipstick - Femme - Androgynous - Soft Butch - Hard Butch

But that has more to do with what type of women we find attractive and is VERY subjective. For example, I fall somewhere in the Lipstick - Femme and my "Hubby" is more of a Soft Butch.

I "could" take exception to the "masculine role" part. What you need to understand is that it isn't an act or a role. A Butch chick may have many of the traits that are conventionally associated with a man, but she is acting based upon the nature she was born with. These traits should not be considered to be exclusively male. To do otherwise is to say that as a feminine lesbian I am attracted to the traits of a man - it definably ain't so, bro!

 

[Stella_Omega]

"She looked for sexy, strong butch women. She seemed to go for older women, too. babydykes didn't interest her much."

Or something like that...

 

[voluptuary_manque]

"She looked for sexy, strong butch women. She seemed to go for older women, too. babydykes didn't interest her much."

Or something like that...

As a het guy, I also find sexy, strong butch women attractive. Go figure.

 

[Boxlicker101]

Thanks, everybody. I will drop the reference to "masculine roles" and describe the actions of the two women to let readers see for themselves. You're right, Liar, instead of including that in a description, I will say something like "Olivia knew she was a femme. . ."

The other woman is named Jessica, and she looks nothing like Sarah Palin, except for also being attractive. She is much younger and is a rather pudgy blonde, with big breasts.

Mat, as a writer of smut, many of my characters will be somewhat stereotyped. This can't really be helped; it goes with the territory. I will try to avoid it, but it just works out that way.

 

[DeeZire]

I would agree that 'lipstick' is a hot-button word these days, depending on whether it's coming from a liberal or a conservative. Knowing your political leanings, I would think it would be safe for you to use it, but your readers could take it the wrong way.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

PC porn. Now I've seen everything.

WRITING 101: When you try to please everyone, you please no one....especially yourself.

 

[Lady_Guenivere]

I don't find it offensive...but then not a whole lot offends me.

 

[elfin_odalisque]

Thanks, everybody. I will drop the reference to "masculine roles" and describe the actions of the two women to let readers see for themselves. You're right, Liar, instead of including that in a description, I will say something like "Olivia knew she was a femme. . ."

The other woman is named Jessica, and she looks nothing like Sarah Palin, except for also being attractive. She is much younger and is a rather pudgy blonde, with big breasts.

Mat, as a writer of smut, many of my characters will be somewhat stereotyped. This can't really be helped; it goes with the territory. I will try to avoid it, but it just works out that way.

No,don't say she knew she was a 'femme'. 'Lipstick lesbian' is a bit insulting and you totally ignore the 'boi' phenomenon which is changing lesbian relationships completely. The biker dyke is a bit old hat.

Anyway, anyone who uses any of those titles is going to be ignored by both lesbian readers and drooling males. Before writing, read a few of Colleen T's pretty butch stories and Evil Alpaca's incredible male-orientated take on lesbianism.

Stereotype is fine - throw it in your face asks for a backclick. As in hetero stuff, there is no need to define anything, let the reality come through with the story and eschew labels and comments about masculinity.

 

[Vermilion]

Instead of aying 'Olivia knew she was a Femme...' - which is just a different way to use the label, why not say something like - 'Glancing in the mirror before she joined Jessica at the bar, Olivia was pretty pleased with what she saw. She added a quick touch of lip gloss, smoothed down her hair so it fell better on her shoulders and tugged her skirt round so it hung straight over her generous hips. Perfect. She sashayed out of the bathroom, certain of every woman's eyes upon her and looking forward to the night ahead...'


That makes sure the reader identifies her as a girlie girl, without once having to give her a label like lipstick lesbo or femme. Besides, those don't say much about a girl, do they? They only say that she's vaguely feminine, not whether she's sexy or vain or pretty or cute or and ingenue.

x
V

 

[matriarch]

Thanks, everybody. I will drop the reference to "masculine roles" and describe the actions of the two women to let readers see for themselves. You're right, Liar, instead of including that in a description, I will say something like "Olivia knew she was a femme. . ."

The other woman is named Jessica, and she looks nothing like Sarah Palin, except for also being attractive. She is much younger and is a rather pudgy blonde, with big breasts.

Mat, as a writer of smut, many of my characters will be somewhat stereotyped. This can't really be helped; it goes with the territory. I will try to avoid it, but it just works out that way.

Sorry to disagree, but stereotypes can be avoided with some imagination, and, in this case, research.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

BOX

To my way of thinking stereotypes can be powerful literary devices. As one of my math professors observed: Stereotypes come in handy when youre out in the jungle, and you hear something crashing thru the trees, headed your way..."they spare you the time it takes to compute Bayn's theorum on conditional threat probabilty."

 

[CharleyH]

As a very open minded lesbian, I don't care how they view themselves, but as a reader, I would have no desire to read any further after that sentence. I'm not offended, just bored with narrow stereotypes.

LOL- perfect.

 

[CharleyH]

BOX

To my way of thinking stereotypes can be powerful literary devices. As one of my math professors observed: Stereotypes come in handy when youre out in the jungle, and you hear something crashing thru the trees, headed your way..."they spare you the time it takes to compute Bayn's theorum on conditional threat probabilty."

lol

 

[CharleyH]

I am writing a story about lesbians, and I want to know if thes sentences would be offensive to anybody"

Jessica was a femme, or lipstick lesbian. She and a few others hung out at the bar looking to be picked up by other women, usually older, who would take the masculine roles during their sexual romps.

Box, first of all I am not offended by the stereotypes (but I appreciate Mat's post - lol). They(stereotypes) truly set it up for an audience of straight guys who want to know what time of day it is. Liar put you in the right direction, but you are not quite seeing it, yet. My observation. I think people are having snores because of the description. It's not exciting and I do not mean this cruelly, but you are kinda stating what the characters are in stereotype rather than letting the reader kind of immerse in their own fantasy of what each looks like and eventually acts like. Good luck, guy.

 

[DeeZire]

Box - what if you just called her a 'Palin lesbian' and let the readers come to their own conclusions? It conjures the lipstick image, but also the take-charge bully. Plus, it would be quite titillating for people like me who get a sick thrill out of imagining highly religious people in sexual situations. I mean, when they're saying "Oh God, yes, that's it! Right there!" they're actually talking to God.

 

[Safe_Bet]

Box - what if you just called her a 'Palin lesbian' and let the readers come to their own conclusions? It conjures the lipstick image, but also the take-charge bully. Plus, it would be quite titillating for people like me who get a sick thrill out of imagining highly religious people in sexual situations. I mean, when they're saying "Oh God, yes, that's it! Right there!" they're actually talking to God.

Listen Mother Fucker! There is NO reason to get offensive and insult every lesbian in the world. Sure there might be a couple of mega bull dykes that would do her, but it would be a revenge fuck!

So watch it bub, or we might start in on you hetero guys and it will get REAL ugly, REAL fast! (Richard Simons - do I need to say more?)

 

[voluptuary_manque]

Another stereotype! Who says that highly religious people all think sex is sinful outside of reproduction? Hmmm?

 

[Boxlicker101]

Sorry to disagree, but stereotypes can be avoided with some imagination, and, in this case, research.

Well, I'm doing the reaearch, which is why this thread is here. I don't expect to write true to life stories, and neither do my readers expect to read them. I like to write abut everybody having fun, and that's what my readers lke to read. However, I do try to avod being offensive, and I don't want to accidentally say anything insulting or offensive about anybody.

I did eliminate the reference to "masculine role" and I will try to make the women's preferences clear while describing their activities. Olivia enters the lesbian bar looking for some action. she spots Jessica, whom she know to be a femme, and hits on her. I can probably omit the reference to a "lipstick lesbian" but I do need something to differentiate what the two different women are looking for. I doubt if everybody knows what a "femme" is. I thought I knew, but wasn't sure, so I looked it up in the online dictionary. The reason I want everybody reading the story to know what it is about is because some might otherwise wonder why Jessica is not reciprocating what Olivia does to her and for her.

ETA: I dobt is Sarah Paln is a lesbian, and her husband and children probably think not also. Since I am trying to avoid being offensive, I will not make the reference DeeZire suggested.

 

[DeeZire]

ETA: I dobt is Sarah Paln is a lesbian, and her husband and children probably think not also. Since I am trying to avoid being offensive, I will not make the reference DeeZire suggested.

Sorry Box. I was confusing your writer persona with your poster persona, using a technique made popular by conservatives when they claimed that Obama was talking about Palin when he mentioned 'lipstick on a pig' in a context devoid of anything having to do with Palin. So, in the spirit of spin machine obfuscation, I was mentioning Palin in the context of lesbians, knowing the association was equally as preposterous.

I still think Palin is a hot looking chick, and I would expect at least a few lesbians to be dressing up as her this halloween, just as she herself dressed up as Tina Fey one Halloween. This is the spirit of my suggestion - as a fun type of thing - teasing the reader to come to their own conclusions.

The fact that some readers might be offended should not deter you from writing colorful prose. As you well know, no matter how carefully you write your story, someone will be pissed. Might as well go for the gusto, eh?