Woman's advice to a man

[Guest]

I have an experienced woman advising a inexperienced young man about women.

I have her listing a few truths.

So far, I have

"When a woman invites you to her place for dinner, it is really for sex. Even if she tells you its not. Maybe even especially if she tells you it is not."

"When a woman slips into your bed on the first date, and says 'I've never done this this fast before.' It probably isn't true, but who gives a shit."

What other truths should he know about women & sex?

Thanks for helping me write my story.

 

[scheherazade_79]

"Even when a woman's glaringly not right about something, she's still never ever wrong."

 

[cheerful_deviant]

Differences...

WOMEN

Women have strengths that amaze men. They carry
children, they carry hardships, they carry
burdens, but they hold happiness, love and joy.
They smile when they want to scream. They sing
when they want to cry. They cry when they are
happy, and laugh when they are nervous. Women
wait by the phone for a "safe at home call" from
a friend, after a snowy drive home. They are
child care workers, executives, attorneys,
stay-at-home moms, biker babes, and your
neighbors. They wear suits, jeans, and they wear
uniforms.

They fight for what they believe in. They stand
up against injustice. They go to the doctor with
a frightened friend. Women are honest, loyal, and
forgiving. They are smart-they know that
knowledge is power. But they still know how to
use their softer side to make a point. Women want
to be the best for their family, their friends,
and themselves. Their hearts break when a friend
dies. They have sorrow at the loss of a family
member, yet they are strong when they think there
is no strength left. A woman can make a romantic
evening unforgettable. Women come in all sizes,
in all colors and shapes. They live in houses,
apartments and cabins. They drive, fly, walk, run
or e-mail you to show how much they care about
you. The heart of a woman is what makes the world
spin. Women do more than just give birth. They
bring joy and hope. They give compassion and
ideals. They give moral support to their family
and friends. And all they want in return is a
hug, a smile, and for you to do the same for
people you come in contact with.



MEN

Men are good at lifting heavy stuff and killing
spiders...

 

[cloudy]

CD:

 

[TheEarl]

Re: Differences...

WOMEN

Women have strengths that amaze men. They carry
children, they carry hardships, they carry
burdens, but they hold happiness, love and joy.
They smile when they want to scream. They sing
when they want to cry. They cry when they are
happy, and laugh when they are nervous. Women
wait by the phone for a "safe at home call" from
a friend, after a snowy drive home. They are
child care workers, executives, attorneys,
stay-at-home moms, biker babes, and your
neighbors. They wear suits, jeans, and they wear
uniforms.

They fight for what they believe in. They stand
up against injustice. They go to the doctor with
a frightened friend. Women are honest, loyal, and
forgiving. They are smart-they know that
knowledge is power. But they still know how to
use their softer side to make a point. Women want
to be the best for their family, their friends,
and themselves. Their hearts break when a friend
dies. They have sorrow at the loss of a family
member, yet they are strong when they think there
is no strength left. A woman can make a romantic
evening unforgettable. Women come in all sizes,
in all colors and shapes. They live in houses,
apartments and cabins. They drive, fly, walk, run
or e-mail you to show how much they care about
you. The heart of a woman is what makes the world
spin. Women do more than just give birth. They
bring joy and hope. They give compassion and
ideals. They give moral support to their family
and friends. And all they want in return is a
hug, a smile, and for you to do the same for
people you come in contact with.



MEN

Men are good at lifting heavy stuff and killing
spiders...

I'm an arachnophobe.

The Earl

 

[Guest]

Re: Re: Differences...

I'm an arachnophobe.

The Earl

Hmmm, that is problematic.

 

[scheherazade_79]

Re: Re: Differences...

I'm an arachnophobe.

The Earl

Use a vacuum cleaner

 

[BlackSnake]

Women have what men what and it's not companionship, no matter what some whips may say. It's that whole between her legs. Everything else is extra. How is that for truths?

The question is, how do you get to that hole.

 

[Colleen Thomas]

Shut your Yap.

That's the best advice I think a young man can get. Few women, no mater what their standards, like to be thought of as easy. It isn't the jock, who is constantly bragging about his conquests who is getting the lion's share of sex. It's the quiet guy who doesn't talk about it.

Every girl in school knows who the big mouth is. The guy who will tell everyone he knows about his night with you. Every girl also knows who the fellow is who dosen't run his mouth, but will rock your world.

-Colly

 

[TheEarl]

Re: Re: Re: Differences...

Use a vacuum cleaner

Not that simple I'm afraid. Can't go anywhere near one, with or without weapon. There's a thread on here somewhere written during a night when I was cut off from my bedroom by a spider patrolling the stairs.

The Earl

 

[Colleen Thomas]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Differences...

Not that simple I'm afraid. Can't go anywhere near one, with or without weapon. There's a thread on here somewhere written during a night when I was cut off from my bedroom by a spider patrolling the stairs.

The Earl

How on earth did you make it through the shelob sequence in LOTR?

 

[cheerful_deviant]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Differences...

How on earth did you make it through the shelob sequence in LOTR?

Under the chair?

 

[Guest]

Shut your Yap.

That's the best advice I think a young man can get. Few women, no mater what their standards, like to be thought of as easy. It isn't the jock, who is constantly bragging about his conquests who is getting the lion's share of sex. It's the quiet guy who doesn't talk about it.

Every girl in school knows who the big mouth is. The guy who will tell everyone he knows about his night with you. Every girl also knows who the fellow is who dosen't run his mouth, but will rock your world.

-Colly

Thank you Colly. Knew that, but didn't think of it for my story--excactly the kind of thing I'm looking for.

 

[Guest]

 

[TheEarl]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Differences...

How on earth did you make it through the shelob sequence in LOTR?

Very strange thing about spiders - when they're magnified so 40ft high, they don't actually look that much like spiders. I could deal with all of the close-ups, cause they were just an alien with mandibles and a stinger.

When it zoomed out however and I could see Shelob properly, then a friend told me what was happening while I hid. Watched it a couple of times so I know when to duck.

Can't watch the spider bit of the 2nd Harry Potter though. Thoroughly agree with Ron Weasley's assessment: "Why couldn't it have been follow the butterflies?"

The Earl

 

[scheherazade_79]

More advice for a man: always leave the toilet seat in the down position if you're sharing with a woman - especially at night. The only thing worse than finding yourself sitting in a bowl of pee at 3am is when you've sat down and discovered that someone's put the seat AND the lid down, which is something else I've noticed men do. That can cause quite a few problems if you've left it to the last minute. Invaluable advice that can make or break a relationship.

 

[lilith1979]

You got to lick it before you stick it.
A womn appreciates a man who cares more about her pleasure than his own.

 

[BlackSnake]

More advice for a man: always leave the toilet seat in the down position if you're sharing with a woman - especially at night. The only thing worse than finding yourself sitting in a bowl of pee at 3am is when you've sat down and discovered that someone's put the seat AND the lid down, which is something else I've noticed men do. That can cause quite a few problems if you've left it to the last minute. Invaluable advice that can make or break a relationship.

Better make it a habit to have the seat and the lid down. No confusion. Home living works both ways, and it's not going to stop you from getting laid if you both agree. Be a partner, not a sap.

 

[BlackSnake]

You got to lick it before you stick it.
A womn appreciates a man who cares more about her pleasure than his own.

Licking is part of the fun.

 

[Pure]

Don't depart quickly after sex. Stay close.

 

[MichelleNJ]

Yes

I could agree with that Pure

 

[Sappholovers]

Aphrodisiacs for women

First the joke: The best aphrodisiac for a woman is a box of laundry detergent.....in the hands of a man who knows where to put it.

More seriously: A woman did a survey of women who have affairs in which she inquired about what attracted them most to the man with whom they were having the affair. The answer was not a big cock, or good in bed, or a Brad Pitt butt, or money, or power, or intelligence or a sense of humor, however helpful those things can be to a man in a relationship. Time and again the women said something to the effect: "When I talk, he looks me in the eye and listens."

Translated, this means care and focused attention....and giving empathy....or listening without interrupting and without immediately giving advice and remedies....just attuning oneself to the woman's concerns and making her feel not more powerful than the man, not a princess or a queen, but equal in significance....or mutual respect...

And in terms of sexual technique, learn how to finger and tongue a woman to a g-spot, squirting orgasm.
The best advice for this is the top rated essay in the How To section of Literotica, "Please Release Me and Let Me Flow" by A. Roissy.

 

[impressive]

The best compliment you can pay is attention.

That being said, I agree with Sappho --- learn to use fingers and tongue skillfully. That "bowling ball" grip with a tongue to the tits never fails to get me -- and pretty damned quickly, too.

 

[Guest]

The best compliment you can pay is attention.

That bears repeating over and over again.

 

[amicus]

Ted E Bare...


"Woman's advice to a man
I have an experienced woman advising a inexperienced young man about women.

I have her listing a few truths."


With tongue only partially lodged in cheek, "Women have only five to eight rational days per month. The week before, the week during and the week after they should either be locked securely away from human contact are at least avoided if at all possible..."

It is no longer politically correct to refer to PMS as a factor in the behavior of a female, however, the advise to take that into consideration might well be the best advice of all.

"Originally posted by cheerful_deviant
WOMEN ..."

That was a nice post...and women can, repeat, can indeed, be all of those things and more.

Feminity is the true joy of life...secondly only to Aristotles note, that 'learning is the greatest joy..."

And here you thought I didn't like the fair sex.....

amicus...