Why So Serious?

[Ravenloft]

"How about Victoria's secret? I've alway's wondered what it was, maybe the clerks there can tell us? I'm betting its that she was a gigantic whore, what do you think?" The Joker asked as he drew Harley toward him with the hooked end of his cane, so that their fronts pressed tightly together.

 

[princesssexci]

Harley began to giggle, that was actually pretty funny. After all the store was full of lingerie along with cool outfits and sundresses. It made sense for the most part. "Victoria's secret? That sounds like fun." She agreed as she followed the joker. She lightly outlined the stitching patterns on his suit.

 

[Ravenloft]

"Vicci's it is then, and if you can keep her secret, then so can I." The Joker quipped as he led the way to the store. Once there, customers and employee's alike took immediate notice of the two of them and promptly scattered. "What's the matter?" The Joker called after them brandishing his cane. "You know her secret too?!"

 

[princesssexci]

As he led her into the store, she couldn't help but giggle then took a look around, ignoring the scared looks from the Australian Victoria Secret employees. She chewed on her lip as her eyes scanned some of the extremely cute outfits. Eventually in the outfit department she chose a short yoga shorts that said PINK in huge letters that were obviously, pink and a matching top that said the university of PINK.

Then she walked towards the underwear section as she looked at some of the extremely revealing bras and panties, along with lingerie. She turned to the joker, "Which one do you think?"

She had already chosen three different options.

Ooc:

Option 1
Option 2
Option 3

 

[Ravenloft]

"Hmm... The second one, without a doubt." The Joker caught a fleeing customer about her waist with the hook of his cane. "Wouldn't you agree, miss?" He asked as he turned the frightened aussie about to see Harley's choices. The woman nodded frantically, making a squeeky noise in her throat as she gave Harley a wided eyed look of fear. "That's an awfully quick reaction, you're not just saying that to make me happy... I HOPE!" The Joker said as he came up behind the captive woman. She shook her head no, stammering nonsense as she began to cry. "If there's one thing I hate, its insencerity... Especially from the fairer sex!" The Joker reached a white gloved hand up as if he were going to caress the woman's neck, but took a fist full of her hair instead and made her drop to her knees.

"Harley, puddin, would you do me a favor and put that on so we can get this woman's HONEST opinion?" The woman cried out in pain before snivling on her knees as she looked up with fear filled pleading eyes.

 

[princesssexci]

Harley gave the woman a sympathetic look before nodding because she didn't want to be the one in this girls shoes. She'd already been in that position before. She took the black and pink shorts then walked into the changing room and got dressed in it. The black really brought out her blonde hair and blue eyes, making it more noticeable.

Harley came out of the dressing room and twirled around."So whaddya think?" She asked, mainly the joker instead of the woman as she tried to keep the girl out of it as much as possible. The shorts showed off her shapely legs while the shirt highlighted the curves of her breasts.

 

[The_PG]

"I think you should all hold it right there," Drawled Taffle, a rather large surf boarder type. He was one of the two deputies that had arrived, his large, powerful .357 magnum was drawn and trained on the back of the Joker's head while his buddy, Rocco, had his standard issue 9mm drawn and pointed at the floor in front of Harley.

Michael stood further back, his .45 Colt still in it's holster. This wasn't his jurisdiction, and he didn't want anyone making him in the crowded store. So he just watched and waited to see what might happen. The Joker looked anything but reasonable, and the deputies had, of course, picked the worst time to kick the door down. Not only was there a hostage, but the girl, Harley, was dressed in quite the lingerie outfit. Michael liked it.

 

[Ravenloft]

The joker took a glance over his shoulder as he yanked the innocent girl up onto her feet by her hair and wheeled her around to stand in front of him. Noticing the gun trained at his head by a man that looked to be more brawn than brains, he smirked a little as he drew his cane up under the woman's chin. "You wouldn't risk an innocent woman's life just to get to little old me, now would you... Officer?" The joker asked as a small shower of sparks cascaded from the end of his cane.

A moment passed as the Joker looked at the two men in police uniforms, noticing a third lingering back from them as well. "I didn't think so... Now, like I was going to say before we were so rudely INTERRUPTED, Puddin, you look lovely."

 

[princesssexci]

Harley looked between the police officers and the joker. Great, now what was she supposed to do? If she acted as though she were a friend, an accomplice to the joker, then...she could possibly go to jail and she'd never make it into the psychiatric business, but if she didn't just rat him out then the joker would probably never ever ever forgive her....not that it mattered if he did, but...she could probably get in a whole buncha trouble.

Hearing Mistah J's answer, she gave him a tiny smile and once again glanced over at the police officers. "Thank god you guys are here!" Harley cried. It was either now or never. She rushed over to the police officers side. " This man, he kidnapped me and..and...tried to do perverted things to me.." She whispered perverted things quietly so the joker wouldn't hear. "Tell me ya here to save me! He kidnapped my boss n everything. I was so scared he was gonna do something to me....I mean, he dragged me here like I was his lil doll to dress up or something! "

 

[The_PG]

((Michael isn't in uniform. Just fyi.))

Rocco had the girl in front of him, and with a frown he rapidly holstered his gun, seized her wrist and spoke, "Listen'ere missy, we'll settle this all out down at the station, fer right now I'm placin you under arrest." Click. The mettallic sound of handcuffs locking on her wrists followed the kind words delivered by Rocco.

Taffle wasn't in such a kind mood, this Joker character was threatening the life of one of his citizens. Taffle could put a bullet through the eye of a bird at twenty paces, and he wasn't afraid of hitting the girl, but there was something fishy with that cane and he thought it might still be able to function without it's owner. Besides, it was best to solve things reasonably, if at all possible, "Listen sir, you hand over the girl, put that cane down nice'n easy, and stick yer hands in the air. I'm takin you in on destruction of property an disturbance of the peace fer starters. Now come on fella, get movin," Taffle pulled the hammer of his revolver back, and took careful aim in case the bloke tried anything fancy.

Michael hung back still, but he was surprised by what he heard of the girls story. That meant she was held hostage all this time? It was very confusing. Very topsy-turvy, but it seemed like this fool lived for that... Shifting, Michael watched as Rocoo began to lead a very sexy Miss Quinzel away, her delicious ass bouncing underneath the Victoria secrets outfit.

 

[Ravenloft]

With a slow shake of his head the Joker gave Harley and the man she'd run to a piercing glare. "I'm afraid I can't let you do that... Officer. You see, the girl is with me, and I don't intend on leaving without her by my side." With the smallest of gestures the joker released the contents of one of his laughing gas pellets into the air.

He let the odorless, colorless gas do its thing as the three men and Harley unwittingly breathed it in. The girl he held in his arms was the last to feel the effects "And as far as your list of offences go, you might want to add resisting arrest, abstructing justice, and two *Sniff* maybe three counts of assaulting an officer in there as well." He said this so matter of factly as he sniffed and gave Michael a knowing glance, as if he could smell the *Cop* on him, that it triggered the incessant giggling his gas was meant to evoke in the men.

 

[princesssexci]

Before Harley knew what was going on, she caught the dark look on Mistah J, erm....Jokers face geared towards her. That meant if she didn't get out of here with these guys then, she definately wouldn't make it out of here alive. Damn it! Why couldn't she have just waited for Batsie to show up? Great, even the jokers lingo was starting to stick with her. That was the last thing she needed. Not long later, she started giggling incessantly along with the two men, "Oh god, ehehehehe you guys hehehehe he's lying! I am not with hehehehe he...him." she said in between giggles, "You got to hehehehe save hehehehe me."

 

[Ravenloft]

The Joker looked from Harley back to the two cops and the third that just smelled of it and smirked a little as if he were just picking up on a really clever joke. "Hehehehe.... Hah! Hahahahaha!" He laughed as the lot of them, even the girl he was holding hostage in his arms fell into fits of laughter. With a spin, the Joker tossed the innocent woman into the two cops and rushed forward, snatching Harley by her wrist, intent on dragging her out of the store. "Oops, pardon me..." He quiped as he saw the third man step in their way, reacting by sticking the business end of his cane agaisnt the mans chest and jolting him with a nasty electric shock.

 

[princesssexci]

Harley giggled as he dragged her out of the store, "Wait no, hehehee, let hehehe me, hahahahehe goooo...." Oh, she was in trouble she knew that much. Perhaps, she shoulda waited for Batsie. Yeah, that probably would have been a good idea and how in the heck was she going to talk her way outta this one. Why couldn't she stop giggling? Why hadn't he told her to cover her face or something? Oh yeah, because she'd basically just told those two guys that he had kidnapped her. Damn it! Now, she was really gonna get in trouble.

 

[The_PG]

Michael had managed to cover his mouth with a handkerchief, but it had blocked his vision and he didn't see the cane coming. The electric force shot him through several racks of clothing and into a full body mirror which shattered into a billion pieces. It was rather lucky though, because he was able to avoid the nasty side effects of that gas that already had half the star laughing, and then dying.

He pulled his pistol out of it's shoulder holster and used the butt to break the nearest window, triggering the store alarm, and giving him a quick out to the street. He stepped through the shattered glass and looked for the Joker, spotting him, dragging the Harley girl, "Hey you! Freeze!" Of course the Joker laughed, and kept moving, "Freeze means stop motherfucker!" Michael yelled, before firing a shot that pinged off a street sign inches from the Jokers head.

 

[Ravenloft]

The Joker ducked his head as Micheal's shot pinged off of a street sign. He did a double take, giving him a mocking smirk, shouting back. "No...! Freeze means cold! You goon! Hah! Hahahah!" He mocked as he hoisted Harley over his shoulder and lobbed a hand full of explosive devices with smiley faces on them toward the shooter. "Have a nice day!!!"

 

[princesssexci]

Harley shouldn't have been giggling still, because none of this was funny. That silly, sophisticated voice told her that she was losing it, that she should've tried to cover her mouth or something when the Joker let the gas free, that she was an idiot, that if she hadn't of gotten involved with trying to impress the boss lady, (she was too high off the laughing gas that she couldn't think of her former boss' name, Julia powers) then she probably wouldn't have caught the Jokers attention to begin with.

Instead, she was giggling at the Jokers words of freeze meaning cold. After all, that was true! It did mean cold, "hehehehehe, hahahaha...." She was so full of giggles she couldn't even say anything, all she could do was laugh. Even when he 'threw' her over his shoulder, she let out a high pitched giggle instead of a high pitched squeal.

 

[The_PG]

Whether it was gas or something more deadly, Michael knew he did not want to be around to find out. Turning, he took two steps before some invisible force seemed to pick him up and throw him forwards. He flipped, head over heels, and then came crashing back down to earth as the roar of explosives filled his ears. The wind was gone from his lungs, they were on fire, but as he slowly regained his breathing and checked himself for injuries he only felt bruises and a few small cuts. Still, it took about five full minutes before he could actually stand up again, and by that time the two crazy characters were long gone.

Michael spent the rest of the day filling out reports, getting examined by paramedics, and cursing whoever had sent him those photos. As soon as he got home he promised he would call HQ and give whoever it was quite a peace of his mind.

 

[Ravenloft]

Never one to leave himself without an out of any situation, the Joker had the chopper they used to escape from the rendering factory waiting for them in a small grassy clearing between parking lots. He flopped Harley up into the passenger seat and buckled her in while she convulsed with giggling tremors. It was the second stage of his laughing gas. First it was just like a dope high, then it became an uncontrolable pathological urge to laugh, next would be the sezures, and finally death. As long as she was still laughing, she should be okay, if he could just get her to Ivy Porter and get her to give Harley a dose of whatever it was that she made to counteract the gas.

*ten minutes later*

Hovering over the private country home of one Ivy Porter, the Joker landed and called over a loud speaker that was part of his chopper's design. "Attention Joker Air passengers, if you look to your right you will see the private home of Australia's very own "black-widow" assassin for hire and purveyor of fine poisons, Ivy Porter!"

 

[princesssexci]

Harley couldn't help but giggle and giggle and giggle even more. Was that a good thing? Should she be laughing at a time like this? Well, it didn't seem like such a bad thing and the fact that the joker was funny to begin with helped alot. She might've thought herself crazy if he wasn't so funny. Though at the moment he hadn't said anything funny.

 

[Ravenloft]

After a moment that seemed to stretch on far longer than a moment aught to the Joker hopped out of his mini-chopper and went around to Harley's side. He unceremoniously drew her up over his shoulder as the continued to convulse with uncontrolable laughter. He turned with her draped over his shoulder, her head to his back, and her legs at his front, and her round, firm behind next to his head as he strode toward the Porter estate's front door. He was bound and determined that Harley wouldn't succumb to his laughing gas, reguardless of Ivy's obvious unwillingness to even acknowledge their presence. "Knock, knock!" He yelled as he leveled his cane at the doors and unleashed a blast powerful enough to knock them off their hinges and several feet into Miss Porters foyer.

 

[princesssexci]

Ivy porter had been working on a plant experiment for quite some time now. It was sure to bring bat boy to his knees, literally. Lately this one experiment involved shiny red lip gloss that was a .... Killer. Ivy couldn't help but grin at her sadly unnoticed brilliance ignored by Wayne Enterprises. Oh he'd rue the day for sure.

For ivy was not just a beauty she had brains as well! the loud BOOM pulled ivy porter out of her thoughts. She gave her little plant a pat on it's pedal and walked out of her lab. What she saw was certainly an astonishment. A blonde girl giggling insanely while the world renowned joker held her... Caveman style.

" you poor thing..." ivy murmured.

Now she didn't know the joker personally after all she'd just started her life of crime a few months back and had seen him quite a few times in the asylum but she'd never heard of the joker having a sidekick.

"I suppose you want me to fix this.." she said pulling the girl out of the jokers arms without waiting for a reply. " I suppose I could brew something up and your shall we say toy will be good as new..."

 

[Ravenloft]

Assuming that Ivy was talking to him when she said "You poor thing..." The Joker wriggled as though his back were aching. "Thanks... But I'll be fine, soon as I put her down..." He said as Ivy came up and took her off his shoulder. "Ah, much better... Heheheheh!" "Well, yeah, if anyone can fix her, its you. After all I conconcted my laughing gas from some of YOUR botanicals..."

 

[princesssexci]

Ivy rolled her eyes at the snide ego centric answer he gave she had been referrring to the giggling blonde girl but it was just like a man to put the focus on him. Oh ivy could see where blondie and the jokeres relationship was going... She wouldn't be surprised if blondie came in here every week. As she stirred her concoction she glanced at the beauty. Such a shame...she probably had a bright future.

"Whats her name?" ivy asked casually

"hehehehehe..." Harley blurted out

 

[Ravenloft]

"Harley Quinn... You can make her better, can't you? Can make her immune to my laughing gas. I don't ever want this to happen to her again. Never ever." There was a slight shake in the Jokers voice as he looked down upon Harley with fondness and concern. "She's my best girl..." He said under his breath.