Why I despise subs

[cocktail42]

*

 

[Pixie Mischief]

GEEZZZZZZZ whats wrong with wanting to please someone???

 

[bluespoke]

What absolute nonsense!

 

[Pixie Mischief]

I think you need to go study before saying bullshit like this.

 

[cocktail42]

*

 

[Pixie Mischief]

I liked ya till I found out how ignorant you could be

 

[cocktail42]

I think you need to go study before saying bullshit like this.

Me or Blue?

 

[Pixie Mischief]

hmm I guess you wanna kill me eh??
I enjoy pain. And I enjoy pleasing my bf. I enjoy when he grabs me and rolls me over.
I enjoy the sex games we play.
There is NO abuse in bdsm.
Abuse is when its involuntary.
Hitting someone because OMG you had a bad day IS abuse.
throwing someone down the stairs IS abuse.
Spanking someone cause they didnt roll over fast enough is NOT abuse.

Nothing if you are pleasing someone on a mutually equal plane but if the "pleasing" is an act of debasement of one person (even if they volunteer) than it's two psychotics merging their illness into one. That is really not my concern - let a therapist deal with that.
My concern is when one person wishes to be debased, the other refuses to debase them and then suffers for it through the abuse of the disappointed psychotic. From personal experience I really didn't like it and my suggestion holds "wipe them off the face of the earth."

 

[Pixie Mischief]

Me or Blue?

You

 

[bluespoke]

From personal experience I really didn't like it and my suggestion holds "wipe them off the face of the earth."

So we should wipe from the face of the earth anything that displeases you?

Your closed mind displeases me, perhaps we should wipe it from the face of the earth!

You don't like it, fine. Others do and their opinion is equally as valid as yours.

 

[cocktail42]

I liked ya till I found out how ignorant you could be

If you think that there is a place in the human experience for one person to dominate another - then you are returning to the stone age. Once again, the subject on hand is: the reaction of the sub to not being dominated.
I am sorry you don't like me any longer but so it goes.

 

[Pixie Mischief]

So we should wipe from the face of the earth anything that displeases you?

Your closed mind displeases me, perhaps we should wipe it from the face of the earth!

You don't like it, fine. Others do and their opinion is equally as valid as yours.

*Agrees with blue* but I Think hes just picking a fight

 

[cocktail42]

So we should wipe from the face of the earth anything that displeases you?

Your closed mind displeases me, perhaps we should wipe it from the face of the earth!

You don't like it, fine. Others do and their opinion is equally as valid as yours.

Yup and you can try. I don't know about all opinions being equally valid. I would say most aren't - sometimes mine are superior sometimes they are not. This is a discussion not a closed subject.

 

[Pixie Mischief]

but what you say dont make sense.
the whole deal is TRUST
that the person wont harm you. TRUST is very important.
if a D/s relationship turns abusive. the D should be arrested. that is ABUSE
if there being abusive then there obviously not a Dom.
tis not whats about.
Its about loving and trusting. Trusting on both parts.
Tis not about being a control freak

If you think that there is a place in the human experience for one person to dominate another - then you are returning to the stone age. Once again, the subject on hand is: the reaction of the sub to not being dominated.
I am sorry you don't like me any longer but so it goes.

 

[woodgie2]

While the psychology of a D/s relationship can be theorised and debated until the cows come home I think it is fair to say you're talking from a very limited experience and exposure to the whole gamut that is D/s relationships.

If you were to study further, and actually speak to the people involved (both the subs and the Dom/mes) you would find that your average sub has more presence of mind and a greater knowledge of themselves than most other people. They have to. As for being incapable of loving or caring for themselves, that is nonsense. Your average sub doesn't put themself in such a position if they don't REALLY want it. Contrary to how things seem it's to a large extent the sub who controls things. After all, they can call the whole thing to a grinding halt with a single word. That they don't choose to when things get clost to the limits, that they push themselves as far as they can shows a great self awareness.

I'm sorry if you got burned by a sub who "turned against you". But with your immediate dismissal of the sub as "...someone who wants to be controlled and debased, not loved, not liked, not seen as a human." I have to question both your suitability as a Dom and your ability to think things out.

I know you'll get a lot of points of view explaned to you in this thread. I only hope that you try to understand, if not accecpt them.

 

[bluespoke]

Very well said Woodgie!

 

[cocktail42]

but what you say dont make sense.
the whole deal is TRUST
that the person wont harm you. TRUST is very important.
if a D/s relationship turns abusive. the D should be arrested. that is ABUSE
if there being abusive then there obviously not a Dom.
tis not whats about.
Its about loving and trusting. Trusting on both parts.
Tis not about being a control freak

I am not really speaking about the childish make believe between some overdressed adults - I am talking about real relationships where one person is seeking vilification by the other to justify their lack of self respect. Loving and trusting is the last thing that is involved. Deceit and abuse carry the day. Perhaps I went overboard by saying subs should be wiped off the face of the earth but at least they should be forced to provide truth in advertising.

 

[woodgie2]

Very well said Woodgie!

thank you.

And I just read the disclaimer in your sig line.

*LOL*

 

[Pixie Mischief]

I am not talking about "Childish make believe either" I'm talking about REAL stuff.
I have ALOT of self respect. I will NOT do anything I REALLY dont wish to do.
BUT I will tollerate things to please him.
Love and Trust are the FIRST things involved.
BECAUSE you must CARE about the person to put YOUR body into THEIR hands.
and you must TRUST them that they will STOP if you say so. and they must TRUST you to tell them if its too much.
My bf would have a FIT if he was doing something that was hurting badly or something and I didnt tell him.
*shakes her head* there is NO abuse in a real D/s realationship. and if there is. Then its not a D/s relationship.

I am not really speaking about the childish make believe between some overdressed adults - I am talking about real relationships where one person is seeking vilification by the other to justify their lack of self respect. Loving and trusting is the last thing that is involved. Deceit and abuse carry the day. Perhaps I went overboard by saying subs should be wiped off the face of the earth but at least they should be forced to provide truth in advertising.

 

[Pixie Mischief]

Opinions are like asshole. everyone has one.

 

[cocktail42]

While the psychology of a D/s relationship can be theorised and debated until the cows come home I think it is fair to say you're talking from a very limited experience and exposure to the whole gamut that is D/s relationships.

If you were to study further, and actually speak to the people involved (both the subs and the Dom/mes) you would find that your average sub has more presence of mind and a greater knowledge of themselves than most other people. They have to. As for being incapable of loving or caring for themselves, that is nonsense. Your average sub doesn't put themself in such a position if they don't REALLY want it. Contrary to how things seem it's to a large extent the sub who controls things. After all, they can call the whole thing to a grinding halt with a single word. That they don't choose to when things get clost to the limits, that they push themselves as far as they can shows a great self awareness.

I'm sorry if you got burned by a sub who "turned against you". But with your immediate dismissal of the sub as "...someone who wants to be controlled and debased, not loved, not liked, not seen as a human." I have to question both your suitability as a Dom and your ability to think things out.

I know you'll get a lot of points of view explaned to you in this thread. I only hope that you try to understand, if not accecpt them.

Hello Woodgie,
I am not a Master, nor do I want to be, or a Dom, I am talking about real relationships where the rules are not as clearly spelled out. In order not to repeat myself please note my reply to Pixie.

 

[cocktail42]

Opinions are like asshole. everyone has one.

Not every asshole smells bad nor is every opinion wrong. I can guess what your opinion of me is and I like you too much to ask you about your asshole - it would be wrong but you started the name calling.

 

[Pixie Mischief]

Not every asshole smells bad nor is every opinion wrong. I can guess what your opinion of me is and I like you too much to ask you about your asshole - it would be wrong but you started the name calling.

hm I only said you where ignorant I did not name call you.

I simply stated that like an asshole *points to her ass* everyone has an opinion to.

 

[cocktail42]

hm I only said you where ignorant I did not name call you.

I simply stated that like an asshole *points to her ass* everyone has an opinion to.

I take it we are friends again. I apologize for misunderstanding your meaning.

 

[Shadowsdream]

Hello Woodgie,
I am not a Master, nor do I want to be, or a Dom, I am talking about real relationships where the rules are not as clearly spelled out. In order not to repeat myself please note my reply to Pixie.

If you are not a Master or a Dom..where is the connection to your own reality here if you don't mind the question?
D/s relationships are as real as any others but to discuss the topic here it would be valuable to know how submissives connect in your reality.