Why Do People Write NC/R?

[SimonDoom]

Men are much, much less likely to report rapes than women. It's hard to get numbers on it, but there's a big separation. Here's an article from about a decade ago: https://slate.com/human-interest/20...ually-assaulted-almost-as-often-as-women.html



The 14% stat is pretty old. Men and boys massively underreported their rapes in the past. They still do, just not as much.

From this NIH study: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3067991/


"If you're raped, you're less of a man." That's what literally decades, maybe centuries of American and British culture have taught. You don't talk about it, you don't report it, you move on with your life. Get revenge if you can and you can get away with it. But never tell anyone it happened. Certainly never tell anyone who could affect your job, social relationships, community standing, etc.

I'm not going to do my homework on this issue, so if I'm wrong I'm wrong, but it seems likely to me this is one of those cases where three things can be true, and probably are true:

1. Men are much more likely than women to be rapists.

2. Women are much more likely than men to be rape victims.

3. Men are much less likely to report rape than women (but keep in mind, we know that women ALSO have strong reasons not to report rape, and we know that historically it's been underreported).

How the numbers shake out exactly, I have no idea, but I don't think it matters much either in 1) how we choose to criminalize rape in the real world, or 2) the kinds of stories we allow at Literotica.

 

[dasgoodshit]

I would think a realistic story about rape, the aftermath, and maybe some just deserts for the rapist would be great. If you can even write that for her, I'd read it.

For "her?"

 

[madelinemasoch]

[No personal attacks or trolling - including creating accounts for this specific purpose. Heated discussions are fine, even welcome. However, personally attacking / kink-shaming a fellow author or reader is not allowed within the Author's Hangout. Threads which devolve into the exchanging of insults will be closed and repeat offenders will be given a timeout, per the AH rules.]

 

[bumpercars]

I think it's perfectly possible to get off to the fantasy of something while acknowledging that the reality is wrong.

I think that Literotica's rules are only partially about moral boundaries - they're also about making sure that few people encounter a story that really puts them off. A fluffy ravishment story is not going to horrify anyone who already clicked NC/R, but a realistic depiction of trauma might. Keeping people from reading something that unexpectedly grosses them out is good for keeping readers.

 

[alohadave]

This word led me to the term cisgender, and I don't understand. It sounds like cisgender just means, a normal person that doesn't think they are something that their body isn't. Is that right?

It's a description of cishet that seperates out ace/aro (asexual/aromantic) people. It's a way to distinguish sexual from non-sexual people.

And then, what's with this polycule thing?

https://www.dictionary.com/e/gender-sexuality/polycule/

 

[pink_silk_glove]

I think it's perfectly possible to get off to the fantasy of something while acknowledging that the reality is wrong.

I think that Literotica's rules are only partially about moral boundaries - they're also about making sure that few people encounter a story that really puts them off. A fluffy ravishment story is not going to horrify anyone who already clicked NC/R, but a realistic depiction of trauma might. Keeping people from reading something that unexpectedly grosses them out is good for keeping readers.

I think the rules are just there for the legalities more than anything. They just don't want to get sued or shut down for hosting rape porn.

The irony of it is that the pseudo-rape that they do allow actually glorifies rape. Not that I'm against people writing pseudo-rape. It's just the stupidity and the hypocrisy of the rule.

 

[MillieDynamite]

"If you're raped, you're less of a man." That's what literally decades, maybe centuries of American and British culture have taught. You don't talk about it, you don't report it, you move on with your life. Get revenge if you can and you can get away with it. But never tell anyone it happened. Certainly never tell anyone who could affect your job, social relationships, community standing, etc.

In Roman times, if a man raped another man, he was the real man and other was something less.

 

[Rob_Royale]

I'd never heard of rape fantasies until I started here. After chatting with my wife about it, she verified that it is a thing and is something she's fantasized about. So I started thinking, what would a husband do to make that fantasy come true, without breaking marriage vows? The story has been pretty well received by men and women so I'm happy with it.

 

[dasgoodshit]

You are a detestable worm in body and soul.

The fuck is wrong with you?

 

[lc69hunter]

I mean... you literally write NC/R. You just don't put it in that category, and it's NC/R against men. Not in all cases, of course, but I'll give an example from Cuckold Camp, Ch. 10: Does Mason seem like he likes... anything being done to him there? Like, at all? He literally gets beaten up by the guy that wants to fuck his girlfriend, thrown out into the hallway, and forced to listen/submit to it. Now, I'll be honest: I haven't read the rest of it. I just grabbed that sample at random. But it's clearly harm being done to a person that does not want it in a sexual context for the titillation of the reader.

I've written one NC/R story, but it's a bit of a cheat; the first page reads like a rape (if you don't read for details), but it's a CNC scene between a woman and her fiance that's intended to help her process the emotions surrounding a rape that took place years before. I've got a couple of others in my story seeds files, both also CNC stories. I'm working on a MC story for the AI event where a woman controls a man's body, but not his mind; regardless of category, that seems more horrific than a "pure" NC/R story to me. And I have a story that I'll probably never write that involves a marital rape (which will NOT sexualize that rape), but outside of that? Nah. I like dominant male stuff up to CNC, but not past that.

That said, two of the best NC/R writers I personally know are women, and several whose work I enjoy are also women. They've all clearly expressed to me the opinion that it's fantasy and should be treated as such, i.e., hot to imagine, disgusting to see happen in real life. It's a step beyond the powerlessness in BDSM, but in the context of a pure fantasy. I've talked to other women who've suffered abuse who say they find it a way (both writing and reading) to interrogate their feelings about what happened to them.

I'll step aside now to let the folks who REALLY know the genre step in, though.

We all have our kinks, and those of others we find unsavory. We should not be kink shaming our other authors. Personally, I have never read an NC/R story and probably never will, but will not shame those who go down that path. I have my own set of kinks, and have been attacked here in AH by at least one other author for my writings and my comments, but in his case, I just consider the source.

 

[Winter_Fare]

I've experienced a lot of negativity around non con content recently. I always tag and usually stick a little note in warning readers so they can avoid if that sort of thing upsets them.

Why do people write that stuff? I can't speak for people, I can only speak for myself. I've had fantasies about rough sex and forced encounters as long as I can remember. Mind control, outright torture, dark stuff, you might say.

Never would I ever want to enact or receive such treatment. I love mystery novels and noir fiction. I wouldn't want to get raped or rape someone anymore than I'd want to get wounded or murdered. Why does the thought of these things excite me? I think I'm just wired that way. Or weird that way, take your pick.

Many people have the same healthy active imagination I do, and enjoy the same.

 

[pink_silk_glove]

Writing is conveying emotion onto the page. When you distill it down, it really is just that. All of the best comedies are the ones that lift our spirits and make us laugh. All of the best dramas are the ones that tug our heart strings. All of the best action stories are the ones that get our adrenalie going. These are emotions. All of our favorite heroes are the ones that we root for because we emotionally connect to them whether it's a Cinderella underdog or an invincible superhero.

When you write a scene, you're trying to convey something emotional, whether you know it or not. Rape has very strong emotions, whether it's the thrill of the power and control for the rapist, or the humiliation shame and fear of the victim. There are terribly strong and vivid emotions there. It's potentially a very poignant thing to write and read. Why do you think there's usually so much backlash over it? People connect to it emotionally whether they intend to or not. That is why you might write non-con.

 

[Cagivagurl]

No one is in favor of real life rape and no one thinks the victim enjoys it. But many people enjoy rape fantasies. 60% of women is a stat I've seen a lot. There is nothing wrong with these people enjoying these fantasies. It doesn't mean they want to be raped. Serving this demand, for others or one's self, is one of the reasons people write ncr. In fantasy like this, it makes perfect sense that the victim experiences pleasure from the rape. Who wants to fantasize about having a traumatic painful experience with no redeeming qualities? Maybe some people but usually a ravishment fantasy is about someone being forced to experience overwhelming pleasure. There was discussion of ravishment in another thread that was kind of productive.

A subset of ncr stories are about people becoming sex slaves. It's not much different from a bdsm story, perhaps a femdom story where the mmc is reduced to an object, kept in a cage, made to eat kibble off the floor, etc, forever. That's a kind of sex slavery, as is a story where someone has to become a sex slave to resolve their debt or avoid blackmail or whatever. No one thinks this would be pleasant in real life. These are fantasies about power, forced submission, finding one's self suddenly without the rights we all expect and take for granted irl.

Then there are people wanting to write realistic rape, the traumatic kind. Their motive may be to write a dark story with gritty subject matter, like a true crime story. Or to write about empowerment through revenge on the rapist. It may be to write about trauma they have experienced, as mentioned above. In the past, people have thought I was talking about this kind of trauma writing when I was actually only talking about ravishment fantasy. So to be clear, they are different motivations and different kinds of writing, not to be conflated. Trauma writing is not for titillation, and would be more likely to include aftermath and PTSD and not likely to include pleasure, unless it's an involuntary orgasm which the victim feels is a betrayal by their own body causing further feelings of guilt and trauma.


Because it is. I don't get why it keeps popping up that people think the site doesn't allow rape. It definitely does. What they don't allow is snuff, permanent injury/maiming, or rape where the victim gets no pleasure. Ravishment, forced pleasure, is the base template. It's been the template for bodice rippers forever. But the site doesn't want torture porn, where the only point is the victim being destroyed. They want stuff someone with a rape fantasy would enjoy.

I'm sorry to say I disagree with you entirely...
Yes, I'm sure there are women, (A small percentage, more like 5% than 70%) Who have had fantasy's of being forced into something they didn't want... Or so they tell them selves... The fact they are dreaming about it means they wouldn't really be doing it against their will.
Writing about it, in such a way that it promotes the act... "JUST DO IT SHE"LL LOVE IT." Only glorifies the act... Makes it seem socially acceptable.
Snuff movies exist because there's a small number of people who get off on murder and killing. That doesn't make it right....
RAPE, is a vile act where a person thinks their will surpasses that of their victim...
It is wrong and to portray it in a way where it encourages people to think it's acceptable, only adds to the problem.
This is not an attack on you personally, or the owner of this thread. Please do not take it as such...
I detest RAPE, and it is never OK...
Victims of rape, never get over it. We try and hide it away but it's always there.
It takes away our ability to trust...

Cagivagurl

 

[Cagivagurl]

I'm not going to do my homework on this issue, so if I'm wrong I'm wrong, but it seems likely to me this is one of those cases where three things can be true, and probably are true:

1. Men are much more likely than women to be rapists.

2. Women are much more likely than men to be rape victims.

3. Men are much less likely to report rape than women (but keep in mind, we know that women ALSO have strong reasons not to report rape, and we know that historically it's been underreported).

How the numbers shake out exactly, I have no idea, but I don't think it matters much either in 1) how we choose to criminalize rape in the real world, or 2) the kinds of stories we allow at Literotica.

Women are not less likely than men to report rape....
All of the reasons men don't report it are true also for women.... Less than 50% of rapes get reported... All genders share exactly the same emotions. Fear, shame embarrassment, disgust, self loathing.
We are humans, we all feel....

Cagivagurl

 

[SimonDoom]

Women are not less likely than men to report rape....
All of the reasons men don't report it are true also for women.... Less than 50% of rapes get reported... All genders share exactly the same emotions. Fear, shame embarrassment, disgust, self loathing.
We are humans, we all feel....

Cagivagurl

I didn't say that. I suggested the opposite. I don't have the facts but it seems likely to me that MEN are less likely to report rape than women. It may or may not be true.

 

[Cagivagurl]

Writing is conveying emotion onto the page. When you distill it down, it really is just that. All of the best comedies are the ones that lift our spirits and make us laugh. All of the best dramas are the ones that tug our heart strings. All of the best action stories are the ones that get our adrenalie going. These are emotions. All of our favorite heroes are the ones that we root for because we emotionally connect to them whether it's a Cinderella underdog or an invincible superhero.

When you write a scene, you're trying to convey something emotional, whether you know it or not. Rape has very strong emotions, whether it's the thrill of the power and control for the rapist, or the humiliation shame and fear of the victim. There are terribly strong and vivid emotions there. It's potentially a very poignant thing to write and read. Why do you think there's usually so much backlash over it? People connect to it emotionally whether they intend to or not. That is why you might write non-con.

When we write about a murderer. Who gets the same sexual thrill the rapist gets. Do we say, it's okay, they're just expressing their sexual desires. Do we say, just do it, the victims will come to love it????
Of course we don't, but somehow, it's OK to portray the victim of rape as getting sexual pleasure???

Cagivagurl

 

[Winter_Fare]

RAPE, is a vile act where a person thinks their will surpasses that of their victim...
It is wrong and to portray it in a way where it encourages people to think it's acceptable, only adds to the problem.
This is not an attack on you personally, or the owner of this thread. Please do not take it as such...
I detest RAPE, and it is never OK...
Victims of rape, never get over it. We try and hide it away but it's always there.
It takes away our ability to trust...

Ok, here goes. My own experience with SA is not something I ever share because as you say, I can't trust people enough. I always expect to be judged, victim blaming is a thing. Men who believe they are entitled to women's bodies are a dangerous reality. All abuse is wrong, and can scar people.

That said, stories are just that, stories. They are not going to change the world. They are not going to make people more likely to offend. There are waaaay more effective things to focus your anger on that a few smutty fantasies shared on an erotic website.

 

[Cagivagurl]

Ok, here goes. My own experience with SA is not something I ever share because as you say, I can't trust people enough. I always expect to be judged, victim blaming is a thing. Men who believe they are entitled to women's bodies are a dangerous reality. All abuse is wrong, and can scar people.

That said, stories are just that, stories. They are not going to change the world. They are not going to make people more likely to offend. There are waaaay more effective things to focus your anger on that a few smutty fantasies shared on an erotic website.

Again... Sorry... I don't mean to be in everybody's face over this... But...
I disagree... By writing fantasy story's where a person is raped against thir will, and enjoys it....
That just trivialises the crime...
This maybe just a erotic story site, but it is rad by hundreds of thousands of people...
Cracks start as that, little chips in the structure, but that is the thin edge of the wedge. They grow into enormous rifts...
Buildings grow one brick at a time.
Rape, isn't enjoyable... It's brutal, disgusting and should be depicted as such...
It is not a naughty fantasy... It's something that will destroy another persons life...
Cagivagurl