Why do I do this to myself

[Ezarc]

Why I am this way.

Pain is my constant companion.
She feeds on my suffering,
My frustration,
My humiliation,
My destruction,
She knows my every fault and
Has a memory for each one.
Ghosts of my past,
And Shadows of my future,
Are her dearest friends.
She holds me tightly,
As I grind my teeth in frustration.
She shyly strokes my head,
As I lay in a crumpled heap in despair.
She jokes with me,
As I scream in animal rage.
She teases me when I feel joy.
Knowing that in the end if will be just her.

 

[red_rose]

*hug*

 

[Ezarc]

Just thought I would share more depressing poetry to the world.

 

[HeavyStick]

Just thought I would share my ass cleansing techniques to the world.

 

[Ezarc]

Ouch!!!!!!!!!

 

[HomerPindar]

Pain is a female? Damn, all the pieces are being fit together tonite...

 

[HeavyStick]

Ouch!!!!!!!!!

sarcasm only. I have no problem with you.

 

[Ishmael]

Why I am this way.

Pain is my constant companion.
She feeds on my suffering,
My frustration,
My humiliation,
My destruction,
She knows my every fault and
Has a memory for each one.
Ghosts of my past,
And Shadows of my future,
Are her dearest friends.
She holds me tightly,
As I grind my teeth in frustration.
She shyly strokes my head,
As I lay in a crumpled heap in despair.
She jokes with me,
As I scream in animal rage.
She teases me when I feel joy.
Knowing that in the end if will be just her.

Hang tough. Go to the meetings and just give it up. I used to be a masochist too, but I gave it up. I did. I was enjoying it way too much.

Ishmael

 

[Ezarc]

Bump for my going to sleep. Who knows, maybe she won't cuddle me to nasty dreams tonight.

 

[Starfish]

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Ezarc)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

Your poem is very a very accurate, and languid approach to expressing what emotional pain is like. I relate.


I know you can find peace. I know, because you are looking for her, and she is a much more endearing, caring companion, and she is not far from any of us. We just have to get that bitch we carry around to get lost first and that isn't an easy task.

I think of you and your need for peace as a means of hopefully guiding the positive vibes to you, so lady peace will know to look for you too.

 

[MsMuffet]

Bump for my going to sleep. Who knows, maybe she won't cuddle me to nasty dreams tonight.

I highly doubt that...

 

[Kitte]

When all you look for is pain, it is all you will see. And sometimes you have to work through the pain to see the love.

 

[Ezarc]

The fucking world can all kiss my AV. Fuck it.

 

[StrawberryPez]

Ez honey, If you kiss mine, I will kiss yours.

 

[marksgirl]

The fucking world can all kiss my AV. Fuck it.

 

[penguindance]

 

[Ezarc]

Story of my life. It is just an excersize in pain endurance. So be it and good night.