Why can't some guys take no for an answer!

[plasticman33]

I've got a very good female friend, who is being stalked by a real loser. He keeps asking her for phone/cyber sex and even though she's told him no, in no uncertain terms, he keeps chasing her!

What part of NO, doesn't he understand!

 

[Bluesboy2]

The part where it is directed at him

You gotta wonder about the clueless.

 

[alildevilish]

because

hes thinking with the wrong head

 

[plasticman33]

Re: because

hes thinking with the wrong head

That's exactly right! The really stupid thing is the jerk doesn't know her or has he ever even seen her!

 

[lovetoread]

Cause if he keeps it up...she may say yes.

That is the whole purpose of his badgering.

I say take him off this persons IM's and dont talk to him again.

 

[nitengale]

How is one really chased in the cyber world. With all the blocking and ignore features available...I don;t understand it.

 

[YogiBare]

I think that if he doesn't stop hounding her, he deserves to have his behavior publically "outed" on the Board, using his nic, too.

Inexcusable behavior.

 

[plasticman33]

I think that if he doesn't stop hounding her, he deserves to have his behavior publically "outed" on the Board, using his nic, too.

Inexcusable behavior.

That might just be the next step, Yogi!

 

[riff]

No means no. I like being told no. Let's me know where I stand.

But think of the movie "Dumb and Dumber." He asks her what are the chances of a guy like me and a girl like you...."

Well, it gets down to where she says "one in a million" and he responds with, "So you are saying I got a chance."

She should have just told him NO!

Not saying that this is what is going on with your friend. Some guys are just dumb and dumber.

It's isn't me- but I can tell you, I am pretty dumb.

 

[Ms_Lilith]

I've been in your friend's situation- I've said no, I've said fuck off, I've ignored all the nicknames that I knew of that person, and blocked them from my email box. He created new names. I changed my entire contact information, and made it so that people not on my list can't get to me. He found me online (I honestly have no idea how).... he had my phone number from before, and I blocked his, he started calling from pay phones. I eventually had to go to the police about it.

 

[DéjàNu]

I've been in your friend's situation- I've said no, I've said fuck off, I've ignored all the nicknames that I knew of that person, and blocked them from my email box. He created new names. I changed my entire contact information, and made it so that people not on my list can't get to me. He found me online (I honestly have no idea how).... he had my phone number from before, and I blocked his, he started calling from pay phones. I eventually had to go to the police about it.

darn..... and what happen next? the police contact him? what?

 

[Ms_Lilith]

well, this guy was actually a cop to begin with, so that didn't help. It ended up that he didn't get arrested or anything, but there's a restraining order. He's not allowed to contact me, and he's not allowed within 5 blocks of my home.

 

[bluemuse]

Learn from my mistake

I made a huge error in judgement that cost me everything.

I was involved.....in love.....every man who PMed me got the same message. I'm in love....I don't cyber...don't ask.

One day a man PMed me...he told me that he liked my sense of humor. I told him what I tell every man who pms me...I told him that I was in love.....so I wouldn't play with him.....but that I would be his friend. he agreed.

It wasn't long before he tried to lead me down a road of sexual roleplaying. I slapped him down and told him that if he continued I wouldn't return his PMs. He tried again....so I stopped returning his PMs.

A few weeks later he responded to thread that I had posted on...I felt badly and extended my hand in friendship through another PM. But I told him, once again that I was in love an wouldn't play. he agreed, once again to respect my boundaries...so we started PMing again.

In our PMs we talked about phone sex, cybering, and at one point he asked me to list three men on Lit that I would want to be with. I told him that I didn't want anyone but my guy. He badgered me and badgered me about it. I finally gave in and listed three people....telling him that I didn't really want them.....but I would play along for fun. How stupid could I be?

It wasn't long before he tried to sexual roleplay again. I slapped him down inthe PMs and in the threads. He got mad and said that I made him looklike a "pussy". He became increasingly hostile and accused me of being with all sorts of men here at Lit. Over and over I told him that I am with ONLY one person here. Someone who I love. He refused to believe me and performed a search on my name..reading every one of my posts. In the process he figured out who my love was.

I had warned him about his behaviour..so I stopped returning his PMs. He then posted a thread calling out the three men I had named in fun.....saying that I wanted phone sex with them. My love saw it and questioned me about it.......I said that the guy twisted my words......used them out of context. I PMed this asshole.....asking him why he is doing this to me? I knew the answer..........he wanted to ruin my relationship.

Last night...this guy sent PMs that he and I exchanged to my Love. I don't think that he sent the ones that were strongly worded....telling him to leave me alone. But....never the less.....the asshole won. My love.......this person who I am crazy about...has asked me to leave him alone. He wants no contact from me. He questions that I am who I say I am.....I am completely heartbroken. I am dying.

I have no one to blame but myself.

 

[bluemuse]

Learn from my mistake

I made a huge error in judgement that cost me everything.

I was involved.....in love.....every man who PMed me got the same message. I'm in love....I don't cyber...don't ask.

One day a man PMed me...he told me that he liked my sense of humor. I told him what I tell every man who pms me...I told him that I was in love.....so I wouldn't play with him.....but that I would be his friend. he agreed.

It wasn't long before he tried to lead me down a road of sexual roleplaying. I slapped him down and told him that if he continued I wouldn't return his PMs. He tried again....so I stopped returning his PMs.

A few weeks later he responded to thread that I had posted on...I felt badly and extended my hand in friendship through another PM. But I told him, once again that I was in love an wouldn't play. he agreed, once again to respect my boundaries...so we started PMing again.

In our PMs we talked about phone sex, cybering, and at one point he asked me to list three men on Lit that I would want to be with. I told him that I didn't want anyone but my guy. He badgered me and badgered me about it. I finally gave in and listed three people....telling him that I didn't really want them.....but I would play along for fun. How stupid could I be?

It wasn't long before he tried to sexual roleplay again. I slapped him down inthe PMs and in the threads. He got mad and said that I made him looklike a "pussy". He became increasingly hostile and accused me of being with all sorts of men here at Lit. Over and over I told him that I am with ONLY one person here. Someone who I love. He refused to believe me and performed a search on my name..reading every one of my posts. In the process he figured out who my love was.

I had warned him about his behaviour..so I stopped returning his PMs. He then posted a thread calling out the three men I had named in fun.....saying that I wanted phone sex with them. My love saw it and questioned me about it.......I said that the guy twisted my words......used them out of context. I PMed this asshole.....asking him why he is doing this to me? I knew the answer..........he wanted to ruin my relationship.

Last night...this guy sent PMs that he and I exchanged to my Love. I don't think that he sent the ones that were strongly worded....telling him to leave me alone. But....never the less.....the asshole won. My love.......this person who I am crazy about...has asked me to leave him alone. He wants no contact from me. He questions that I am who I say I am.....I am completely heartbroken. I am dying.

I have no one to blame but myself.

 

[Aphrodisiac]

I have come upon those sort of men ...

I think the men I encountered did not understand that I said "no" to them because I was not suppose to ... these men have been what is considered "good looking" and I guess not many women turn them down.

My reason for turning them down was simply because they had such an ugly personality and I did not care to even be friends with them.

I find it amusing though , when I say no and its obvious I am not going to change my mind. All of a sudden they get all mad and begin to act like they did not want to go out with me in the first place, they come out saying such things as


" I was just testing you" ,

" Any ways you are not my type of woman , it would not have worked out ... etc ... " and all that other bull shit.


This always makes me laugh and I think my laughing hurts their giant sized ego. I find that part fun ... the one thing these men are good for is a laugh.

 

[Ms_Lilith]

*hug* honey, I'm so sorry! I wish there was something I could do to help you feel better, but I don't know what to say, really. If you ever need to talk, feel free to PM me, and we can go over things, or I can just try to cheer you up. I have to tell you, though.. if your love truly loved you, he would take your side in this argument.. he would trust you, and he would allow you to explain, and then understand what an asshole the other guy is/was/I'm sure still is. *hug* I'm here for you.

 

[DéjàNu]

Oh bluemuse that sucks!!!

Like say Vixenshe if your love truly love you he will be back but for now he is surely really mystified about all of this...

Should we start a list of asshole who reside on this board and give their username? that might scare them a bit...

I've never been in this kind of situation and I've turn alot of guys in my life... but anyway if it was to happen to me I wouldnt hesitated a second to post their username here!!!!!

 

[bluemuse]

*hug* honey, I'm so sorry! I wish there was something I could do to help you feel better, but I don't know what to say, really. If you ever need to talk, feel free to PM me, and we can go over things, or I can just try to cheer you up. I have to tell you, though.. if your love truly loved you, he would take your side in this argument.. he would trust you, and he would allow you to explain, and then understand what an asshole the other guy is/was/I'm sure still is. *hug* I'm here for you.

Thank you so much. But.......the way it looks.....really......I can't blame him. No....I NEVER played with this man. I told him over and over that I played with no one. All I can think is that he didn't forward those PMs or those parts of the PMs to my love.

And......I had denied talking about certain things with this man.to my guy. I denied it. I was up all night thinking about it. I wanted to talk to him today...to come clean about everything that I said to this guy. I won;t get that chance now. He won't talk to me...read my emails or PMs. I'm dead to him. He threw us away.

The only thing I can think of is that he was looking for a way to get rid of me. I can't stop crying.

 

[bluemuse]

Oh bluemuse that sucks!!!

Like say Vixenshe if your love truly love you he will be back but for now he is surely really mystified about all of this...

Should we start a list of asshole who reside on this board and give their username? that might scare them a bit...

I've never been in this kind of situation and I've turn alot of guys in my life... but anyway if it was to happen to me I wouldnt hesitated a second to post their username here!!!!!

Thank you so much Deja. as much as I'd love to post this man's username.......I will not lower myself to his level. I made a huge mistake.......I won't compound it by lowering myself to his level.

I'm in so much goddamn pain right now. I just don't see the end..

My guy asked me not to contact him in any way shape or form. I did try to contact him..but fromnow on I will respect his wishes. It hurts so much...but I will respect what he wants.

I hate that I hurt him. I can't stand hurting anyone.....least of alll someone I love.