Why are women so fucking moody?

[BlkPnthr]

When couples fight, it's almost never about what they say it's about. Nobody's going to really get mad because you'd rather watch a hockey game than go shopping, unless it is a signifier of something that's bothering her more.
What did you say the last time she wanted you to go somewhere with her?
Maybe she wanted your input on what she was shopping for?
Maybe she asked you 3 weeks ago if you'd go with her this weekend, but you were watching sports at the time and didn't pay attention?
Don't get me wrong, I'm not taking sides, but I suspect there is something more important she's upset about. Ask her. And then listen to her. OH, and look AT her when she explains it to her, don't look off into space

COming froma woman....that's damn good advice I've learned that one a long time ago

 

[juicylips]

Sorry Cassidy, Didn't mean ALL women, just the one I'm living with.

Now if you had been there I probably wouldn't have been watching TV anyway, right?

god, I would hope not!! I could entertain you better than any game on tv, babe.

No halftime, timeouts or replays either

Cassidy

 

[Tim1]

It's because

From their perspective, we are sposed to drop everything. When was the last time you begged a woman to go to Home Depot with you? (Never I'll bet) . Geeeeeezzzzzz. Hey honey they are having a great sale on fertilizer, and by the way I noticed that the grill is all fucked up and needs a new burner. HEY come WITH me and help me pick it out. (oh please) Give me a break.

I too have been married 25 years and I've seen my males friends dragged to garden stores, dress shops, anyplace that gets our butts off the couch on a weekend. Its life and it won't ever change.

Shit I'm sitting here now with pneumonia and can you believe it.....My wife askd if I wanted to go to "Bed Bath and Beyond" Sure honey I'd love to go, lemme get my oxygen tank and never mind the snot running down my face.

 

[JennyOmanHill]

An insight...

Sorry Cassidy, Didn't mean ALL women, just the one I'm living with.

Now if you had been there I probably wouldn't have been watching TV anyway, right?

I realize we fool around on the boards to lighten up some serious topics, but I did sense a possible "answer" to your problem from this response!

 

[tn_8tiv]

I can't speak for all women but I know I can be a moody bitch. But it's always about extremely important stuff like the coffee not being ready as soon as I wake up.

I really don't get why your wife got her knickers all in a knot over this. Did she need you to drive her to the mall or pay for the items?

Hell no, she's got her own car and she doesn't consult me on anything she buys.

 

[tn_8tiv]

Re: An insight...

I realize we fool around on the boards to lighten up some serious topics, but I did sense a possible "answer" to your problem from this response!

Well lol. If I were completely happy, why the hell would I have to flirt here on Lit.

But Jenny, after 25 years the last 10 of which I have been going through similar situations where if things didn't go her way, she cuts me off both conversationally and sexually what the hell do you expect?

No, I'm no Saint but there are times for companionship and conversation and the middle of the Gold Medal Hockey match isn't one of them.

 

[tn_8tiv]

god, I would hope not!! I could entertain you better than any game on tv, babe.

No halftime, timeouts or replays either

Cassidy

Wow Cassidy, Can you be on top though so I can see the TV.

 

[bluntforcemama]

Why do women......?

Well, let's see... if a woman had to deal with you asking her these stupid, and somewhat mean questions, I'd be pissy, too. When you learn some tact (though your spelling is improving, thank God), then maybe you'll find the answers to whatever puny thing ails you. Until then, maybe you should try men if women are bugging you so much.




That's why women are pissy. They have to deal with the likes of you.

 

[BlkPnthr]

Re: Why do women......?

Well, let's see... if a woman had to deal with you asking her these stupid, and somewhat mean questions, I'd be pissy, too. When you learn some tact (though your spelling is improving, thank God), then maybe you'll find the answers to whatever puny thing ails you. Until then, maybe you should try men if women are bugging you so much.




That's why women are pissy. They have to deal with the likes of you.

*Ouch* Someone is in a bad mood

 

[JennyOmanHill]

Re: Re: An insight...

Well lol. If I were completely happy, why the hell would I have to flirt here on Lit.
But Jenny, after 25 years the last 10 of which I have been going through similar situations where if things didn't go her way, she cuts me off both conversationally and sexually what the hell do you expect?
No, I'm no Saint but there are times for companionship and conversation and the middle of the Gold Medal Hockey match isn't one of them.

I wholeheartedly agree, tn!! It would have taken a dire emergency to pry me away from the Olympics, especially that gold metal game!

Guess women in general do have a "bond", and I couldn't resist teasing you about your flirting! I mean, even suggesting that Juicy would keep you away from the game isn't believeable either! (No offense, Juicy, but it WAS the gold medal game!)

We "women", as we get older, do appear to get moodier, and if it's been happening throughout the last 10 years, it really shouldn't have come as such a surprise!

I believe in love though, and hope you two find a way to make your relationship less testy and more comfortable!

 

[JazzManJim]

For my money, women get pissy because they can be. They have a virtual monopoly on the kind of companionship that most guys want, so they don't have to worry too much about competition of another sort. They're all in it together. They bank that other women are going to be pissy, too.

And we keep coming back for the pissiness, too.

Guys are no angels, trust me, but hell...just bloody hell, women can out-pissy a guy any day of the week, hands down!

 

[tn_8tiv]

Re: Why do women......?

That's why women are pissy. They have to deal with the likes of you.

Thanks Myst, that was damn enlightening! I'll bet your s/o is so fucking henpecked he probably would have jumped up off the couch and taken you shopping.

 

[anneski]

How can anyone prefer hockey to shopping? Are you all mad? The drooling over the clothes, the feel of the smooth plastic of your card as it slides from your fingers, listening to the joyous tones of the cash register as it goes "kerching!", the thrill of all those glossy bags of goodies.... mmm.......

Course, if anyone suggested I leave my snuggly chair when F1 is on, THEN you'd see moody...

 

[Ginny]

Guys are no angels, trust me, but hell...just bloody hell, women can out-pissy a guy any day of the week, hands down!

"out-pissy"

too damn cool

 

[JUDO]

Next time

(Like men are never moody and selfish. Ha!)

Here's a suggestion: The next time this happens tell her she's made you really horny. You feel an attraction you can't explain and you must have her. Bend her over the couch and go at it. And if you're still really interested in the game, catch a couple points while doing so, then...

When you're both done, go shopping with her and tape the game. She'll likely be very pleased and you can watch the game at your leisure.

 

[april-wine]

Maybe she just does not like Canadian's.

Hey what's not to like............

 

[tn_8tiv]

Re: Next time

Here's a suggestion: The next time this happens tell her she's made you really horny. You feel an attraction you can't explain and you must have her. Bend her over the couch and go at it. And if you're still really interested in the game, catch a couple points while doing so, then...

When you're both done, go shopping with her and tape the game. She'll likely be very pleased and you can watch the game at your leisure.

Why tape the game. It's ancient history by the time we could get back from shopping.

The real issue is that people obviously have different priorities. Marriage should evolve into the couple understanding the needs of each and be willing to compromise. I believe several who have responded to this thread have hit the nail on the head. My wife obviously feels I am not giving her enough attention which is probably true. But her moods swing from seeming very content to a real "bitch" in just a few minutes. That is what I'm complaining about.

 

[Sabineteas]

Maybe, just maybe, she wanted some attention from you. What had the two of you done together before on the weekend?

My experience, it takes two to cause a problem.

You need to ask her and really pay attention when she answers. Communication is the key part of any relationship.

 

[juicylips]

Maybe, just maybe, she wanted some attention from you. What had the two of you done together before on the weekend?

My experience, it takes two to cause a problem.

You need to ask her and really pay attention when she answers. Communication is the key part of any relationship.

Good answer, sweetie!!


How are you doing?? Have a good weekend?

Cassidy

 

[tn_8tiv]

Maybe, just maybe, she wanted some attention from you. What had the two of you done together before on the weekend?

My experience, it takes two to cause a problem.

You need to ask her and really pay attention when she answers. Communication is the key part of any relationship.

Don't get me wrong, I understand the need to communicate. We do talk often. Before this weekend, I had taken her out to dinner the evening before. We had a nice Valentine's day last weekend complete with a gold necklace as a gift. As far as her needing attention, I probably don't give her as much as she needs but that's not the issue here. What causes the mood swings? How can a person go from a sense of calm to a bitchy mood in just a few minutes, seemingly over a hockey match. I know that it's really not the hockey match(or maybe it is).

What's been going on with my wife and I has been happening a long time. I thought that after 25 years the sexual part (or lack thereof) of the marriage was normal and that's why I began to look for some sexual excitement wherever I could find it. But it is tough to live with the tremendous mood swings.

 

[Calamity Jane]

Re: Why do women......?

Well, let's see... if a woman had to deal with you asking her these stupid, and somewhat mean questions, I'd be pissy, too. When you learn some tact (though your spelling is improving, thank God), then maybe you'll find the answers to whatever puny thing ails you. Until then, maybe you should try men if women are bugging you so much.




That's why women are pissy. They have to deal with the likes of you.

So Myst... when MY husband is bein pissy cuz I want to go ride my horse rather than sit on my ass and watch tv with him, it's my fault he's pissed off?

Bitterness doesn't become you darlin.

 

[Sabineteas]

Thanks, Cassidy, it was nice and quiet. I really appreciate that you care.

Mood swings....let's see
Homonal changes
Cramps and menstrual pain
Feeling insecure--I'm fat, I'm ugly, he doesnt care about me
Feeling stress---caring for children, being the perfect mother and wife

It doesnt even have to be you or what you do or don't do. You're there and if she is feeling down, people tend to lash out at the closest one to them.

Just understand, she is wanting something from you and you need to realize that and be there for her. By talking, listening and letting her know that you care for her and her feelings. And it goes both ways, you are just as important as she is.

Women can be irrational. I know. I see that you have 25 years together. Give her the time and your attention. She obviously needs it. Don't get angry, don't try to judge her, just be her loving husband. The more you of that you do, the more open she will be. And the easier it will be for you two to communicate.

You've got all that time together, make the effort and you both will be rewarded much more than you would ever expect. She's looking for something that you can give her. Good luck

 

[tn_8tiv]

Mood swings....let's see
Homonal changes
Cramps and menstrual pain
Feeling insecure--I'm fat, I'm ugly, he doesnt care about me
Feeling stress---caring for children, being the perfect mother and wife

It doesnt even have to be you or what you do or don't do. You're there and if she is feeling down, people tend to lash out at the closest one to them.

I know you really mean well and I thank you for caring. I do truly understand all of the things you enumerate in your post. For 25 years I have tried to keep things on an even keel but sometimes as the song says, "I want to talk about me".

When I try to tell her that its important that I watch the Olympic Gold Medal Match does that give her the right to clam up and give me the cold shoulder for the rest of the night?

Are you saying that only women have the right to be "moody"?

 

[Sabineteas]

Oh god no. Women do not have the only right to be moody. It would be nice if we weren't but I was trying to give you some reasons why.

All I am trying to say is that she is feeling something hurtful and you feel that it is unfair. I suspect that you do not know why. That is why you two have to communicate. You cannot read her mind.

She may be very unfair to you right now. She may have a reason. It may be a valid reason, it may not. But now, in her mind, it is. That's why I keep coming back to talking and listening. Both of you.

We hear what you say, but we cannot solve the problem or fix this for you. You and she can. That's all there is.

Yes, women are moody, most women. Yes, sometimes it is valid, sometimes it isn't. Sometimes we are fair, sometimes we are not. Sometimes it is what happened today, sometimes it is from so long ago, a man will not even remember it.

But you have chosen to spend your life with her. And to do that, this is going to happen. So, you can choose to suffer with this or try to understand and get her to understand you. I hope that you both try to understand each other. By talking and listening.