Where the F*#K is My Cheese?

[carsonshepherd]

Seriously. We looked in the fridge, the freezer. In every cabinet. Under the washer, under the stove, in the stove.

Words were exchanged; food products were thrown. Now the cheese is gone. I am more and more convinced there was never any cheese to begin with; while my SO takes the point of view, that when we wake up in the morning, a line of ants will lead us to the missing cheese. Wherever it may be.

Where, oh where, is the cheese?

 

[minsue]

http://www.addis-welt.de/smilie/smilie/essen/1614.gif

 

[OhMissScarlett]

Seriously. We looked in the fridge, the freezer. In every cabinet. Under the washer, under the stove, in the stove.

Words were exchanged; food products were thrown. Now the cheese is gone. I am more and more convinced there was never any cheese to begin with; while my SO takes the point of view, that when we wake up in the morning, a line of ants will lead us to the missing cheese. Wherever it may be.

Where, oh where, is the cheese?

I was just about to say "Pssst, it's in the refrigerator," then I read your thread. Dunno Carson. Behold! the power of cheese.

 

[carsonshepherd]

I think we have a gas leak, now that we moved the stove to look under it!

Nothing there but lots and lots of dog hair.

 

[OhMissScarlett]

One time I had a large party at my house and afterwards we noticed a package of brand name processed cheese slices had gone missing. We looked high and low for the cheese and couldn't find it anywhere.

Two weeks later, I found a package of less expensive cheese slices in the mailbox with a note attached to it. It seems a friend who was at the party got drunk and stole our cheese because he thought it would be a fun joke to play. His roommate found out about it, replaced the cheese, and wrote me a letter of apology.

So, the culprit may not even be someone from your household.

 

[carsonshepherd]

Personally I don't give a fuck where the cheese is... I'm convinced my SO ate it this morning and just imagined getting out before the throwing commenced.

It was American cheese and I hate American cheese.

 

[Boxlicker101]

Could it be your house is infested with mice? If one of them is wearing yellow Spandex, don't mess with them.

 

[SensualCealy]

Did they pack it at the grocery store? many times Ive gone shopping only to find the item missing- either left in the trunk 'cause it fell out and the kids are too lazy to pick it up, or the next time I go to the grocery store I am given a note from one of the girls saying I left it behind and to please take a fresh one before I leave.

It pays to live in a small city, I know 90% of the girls at the store I shop at . One time I left a package of Rolos, they wrapped them up with a note saying , "Did you get your chocolate fix?" lol

Mean spirited sometimes they are those beotches! lol
sc

 

[rgraham666]

If you've got a dog, it's probably inside the dog.

 

[doormouse]

I'm innocent

 

[Guest]

 

[carsonshepherd]

I'm innocent

No, you're not.

 

[carsonshepherd]

In honor of the cheese:

 

[carsonshepherd]

BEHOLD THE POWER OF CHEESE!

We did not find it in the sink,
we did not find it in our drink.

It was not eaten by a dog,
It was not hiding beneath a log.

I thought it was not in the house.
Perhaps it was stolen by a mouse.

Ten minutes ago, the cheese was found.
Still in the wrapper it was bound.

My boyfriend stood upon a stool.
I would have thought he was a fool...

But now, I see, I must admit:
He found it atop the cabinet.

I thought my boyfriend told a lie.
But behold - it's magic -
CHEESE CAN FLY!

 

[BlackShanglan]

And you said you weren't a poet!

My favorite food hiding place: the bottom of a backpack, which was used to hike the groceries home. The food in question was sliced corned beef. The time of location? About two weeks after the shopping trip.

Thank goodness the cheese was less crafty.

Shanglan

 

[carsonshepherd]

Thank goodness the cheese was less crafty.

Shanglan

You do mean... Kraft-y... don't you?

 

[OhMissScarlett]

That cheese poem is the best. How the hell did it get up on the cabinet? I think you have a polterghost. That cheese was trying to go toward the light.

 

[doormouse]

OMG

This thread makes me hungry LOL

 

[BlackShanglan]

You do mean... Kraft-y... don't you?

I can't believe I both said that and missed that. I must have still been misty-eyed and reeling from the beauty of the Ode to Cheese.

That, or mesmerized by Miss Scarlett's charming little kitty-minx.

Shanglan

 

[carsonshepherd]

it ain't a kitty, it's supposed to be a devil. Devil Grrl, we call her.

 

[Boxlicker101]

Seriously. We looked in the fridge, the freezer. In every cabinet. Under the washer, under the stove, in the stove.

Words were exchanged; food products were thrown. Now the cheese is gone. I am more and more convinced there was never any cheese to begin with; while my SO takes the point of view, that when we wake up in the morning, a line of ants will lead us to the missing cheese. Wherever it may be.

Where, oh where, is the cheese?

Have you talked to Doormouse about it. She professes innocense but you know how mice are about cheese.

 

[BlackShanglan]

it ain't a kitty, it's supposed to be a devil. Devil Grrl, we call her.

Sure it's not an owl?

Shanglan

 

[OhMissScarlett]

Sure it's not an owl?

Shanglan

No, it's a horny devil girl. Appropriate huh?

 

[LustyLovers]

LOL

 

[SlickTony]

I had that happen to something else that I bought--I don't think it was cheese. Ah--now I remember; it was roach baits. And they turned out to be in the front seat of the car when all the rest of the groceries were in back.

OTOH, I bought some catfood at Wal-Mart, and ended up coming home without it. They'd just gone to those carrousel thingies at the checkout counter, and the catfood just didn't get picked up. And this was the night before we were supposed to go somewhere, and we were packing and all. I've been leery of those carrousels ever since. The clerks love them, but not me.