When a collar has no meaning

[thetiesthatbindme]

What do you do with a collar when you're no longer owned? I don't want it,but throwing it away seems like a waste.I'm thinking either put it in with a box of donations, or putting it on fb marketplace. I don't know how much my former D paid for it,but it's nice,with the original box and 2keys. If I can get rid of it,AND make a few bucks,might be worth it.

 

[Otis_Ravelli]

Firstly, I'm sorry to hear that it no longer holds meaning. These things are always tough and with BDSM relationships often moreso.

Maybe it might be with setting up some sort of thread here for the passing on of such things. Alternatively I'm sure eBay must have a specific section for that sort of thing.

 

[MissPennyLane]

I am sorry you feel it no longer holds any meaning, I am a rather nostalgic soul so I'd probably keep it somewhere so that occasionally I may stumble upon it and although it might be painful, eventually I'd just think of all of the great memories and experiences and have a moment to appreciate that part of my life.

I am not sure how people sell on such an item, but I agree throwing it out seems a waste

 

[IrisAlthea]

What do you do with a collar when you're no longer owned? I don't want it,but throwing it away seems like a waste.I'm thinking either put it in with a box of donations, or putting it on fb marketplace. I don't know how much my former D paid for it,but it's nice,with the original box and 2keys. If I can get rid of it,AND make a few bucks,might be worth it.

You can do a reverse picture search to find a reasonable price point, if you want to sell it.
Giving it back would be another option.

I am a rather nostalgic soul so I'd probably keep it somewhere so that occasionally I may stumble upon it and although it might be painful, eventually I'd just think of all of the great memories and experiences and have a moment to appreciate that part of my life.

This is probably what I would do too.

(And by probably I might mean absolutely, because I still have the gold plated IC chip my first puppy love boyfriend turned into a necklace for me in another millenium.)

 

[Dom70]

PM me please

 

[Dom70]

What do you do with a collar when you're no longer owned? I don't want it,but throwing it away seems like a waste.I'm thinking either put it in with a box of donations, or putting it on fb marketplace. I don't know how much my former D paid for it,but it's nice,with the original box and 2keys. If I can get rid of it,AND make a few bucks,might be worth it.

PM me please....and all others please ignore my PM me please below! LOL

 

[thetiesthatbindme]

You can do a reverse picture search to find a reasonable price point, if you want to sell it.
Giving it back would be another option.

This is probably what I would do too.

(And by probably I might mean absolutely, because I still have the gold plated IC chip my first puppy love boyfriend turned into a necklace for me in another millenium.)

I'm glad you have tokens that have sentimental value. When I got the collar in the mail,I wasn't allowed to open it till my D was with me. He made a big deal about what the collar meant to both of us...it was very special when he put it around my neck and locked it. Every morning he sent me a good morning video and giving me my task for the day and we.spent almost every night together; we always said how lucky we were to have found each other. Then out of the blue, he told me he couldn't continue to be my D because thing's had come up that needed his attention. That's all the explanation I got in an email. I tried to message him on Skype, email and even here on lit,to no avail. I'm assuming he got 'caught' by someone...I guess I'll never know, so the collar meant nothing to him and means even less to me.

 

[IrisAlthea]

Then out of the blue, he told me he couldn't continue to be my D because thing's had come up that needed his attention. That's all the explanation I got in an email. I tried to message him on Skype, email and even here on lit,to no avail

I’m sorry to hear that.

I'm assuming he got 'caught' by someone...I guess I'll never know, so the collar meant nothing to him and means even less to me.

It’s quite possible that he was caught or that he couldn’t keep up the interaction the way he started it.
It doesn’t necessarily mean that it meant nothing at all to him - people can be pretty complicated and confused.
However he may have felt, he doesn’t get to define how you should think about it though. That is for you to decide.

 

[MissPennyLane]

"It doesn’t necessarily mean that it meant nothing at all to him - people can be pretty complicated and confused.
However he may have felt, he doesn’t get to define how you should think about it though. That is for you to decide."

I couldn't have put it better myself

 

[MissPennyLane]

I'm glad you have tokens that have sentimental value. When I got the collar in the mail,I wasn't allowed to open it till my D was with me. He made a big deal about what the collar meant to both of us...it was very special when he put it around my neck and locked it. Every morning he sent me a good morning video and giving me my task for the day and we.spent almost every night together; we always said how lucky we were to have found each other. Then out of the blue, he told me he couldn't continue to be my D because thing's had come up that needed his attention. That's all the explanation I got in an email. I tried to message him on Skype, email and even here on lit,to no avail. I'm assuming he got 'caught' by someone...I guess I'll never know, so the collar meant nothing to him and means even less to me.

I am so sorry you went through this, it's of course up to you how you feel about said collar now. I just wanted to say that you're allowed to grieve a relationship that has ended and you're allowed to do what feels best for you in the moment x

 

[BiBunny]

I almost died from drinking one night. I had every intention of killing myself, and I damn near succeeded. For years afterward, I kept the bottle of rum that was one of several bottles I drank from that night, as a reminder of my triumph over death.

I tell you this story to tell you this one: I was collared to a psychopath for the better part of five years. That almost killed me, too. I keep the collar for the same reason I kept that bottle of rum--to remind myself that even though these things tried to kill me, I'm stronger than they were.

I ran across said collar recently when I was cleaning out my toy bag. I texted Daddy and told him it was a symbol of my triumph over evil. He understood completely, bless him.

 

[thetiesthatbindme]

Those r awesome stories. When I see the box with the collar in it,it just reminds me of the time and energy I wasted on somebody who didn't deserve it. Plus,I'm trying to simplify my life and keep only the things that I absolutely love. Sounds like you're in a much better place, congrats and Thanks

 

[slavemelanie]

It's kind of ironic that you gave up control for that collar and it now becomes a personal choice for you now. Without the Dominant the collar become a hollow symbolic item. For me it would depend on if the memories of that commitment were positive or negative whether I kept it or not. If I was scarred from the relationship out it would go. It's hard to look forward when you've been hurt with reminders around. If the Dom ends things for a legitimate reason as a sub you wish him the best and cherish the memories and i would keep it safely tucked away. But it's personal choice and something that's not easy for this submissive.

 

[sallysparrow23]

What do you do with a collar when you're no longer owned? I don't want it,but throwing it away seems like a waste.I'm thinking either put it in with a box of donations, or putting it on fb marketplace. I don't know how much my former D paid for it,but it's nice,with the original box and 2keys. If I can get rid of it,AND make a few bucks,might be worth it.

For me, it depends on the situation. I've been given a collar once, and I saved it as something to remember our relationship by. Our relationship ended on good terms, it was just no longer possible since he was moving far away. I kept in in my jewelry box and forgot it was there until recently I was going through it and found it. It brought back good memories and I'm glad I kept it, though I don't really need it anymore and considered tossing it but haven't yet.

If it reminded me of a toxic situation a personally would get rid of it, but that's how I process things like that.