WHAT should i do???

[juicypeachxx]

Ok heres the sitch: this guy is hot for me & basically wants sex with me. we have flirted stared at each other then started to really talk to each other & decided we wanna get together. we are both attched but i am here out of town for 2 months. Now i might want to go all the way but really i just want to make out mess around... Lit I guess has made me bold becos I have been saying filthy things with him on the phone mainly and we talked about just meeting for sex. I am out of town here for 2 more months & this is probably my only opportunity to "cheat" even though technically its not cheating cos we are broken up but getting back together. i dont want a moral discussion on why not to cheat! please god!... just give me advice what to do since this guy has cooled off since i told him 2 days ago i want more than just sex i want emotion behind it. i want us to have a relationship. i havent told him yet i am leaving in 2 months...he did tell me he thinks of me all the time and will go out places i mentioned. but it pissed me off he said last time, yesterday "call me if you want to tomorrow " i said ok but was mad he didnt say ill call you or when is a good time ot call you. So basically i will wait to see what he does and if he isnt acting 200% hot for me i am stopping the whole thing... ADVICE?
**update**
I have had a few phone discussions with him since and am proceeding much more slowly and he is happy to have a fun sexxy realtionship in the 2 months we are together. i told him i am leaving in august. he agrees that he too wants more than just sex, that i "drive him crazy" and a bunch of other sweet things. now im sure going ahead with this will probably lead to an "emotional crisis" in the future but WTH... I'm only young once and i dont wanna look back on my life & say oh why was i only with that one, 2... 3 lovers! i should have had as many as possible!
**update 2**
it was very difficult to just relax and let things play out. but now happily we are together, having made out tonight in the car for an hour or so, which is exactly what i wanted!! and he is very super nice and very super sexxy and i just wish we had gotten started sooner.

 

[Guest]

cheating sucks.

 

[BertrandRussell]

... i am here out of town for 2 months.... i told him 2 days ago i want more than just sex i want emotion behind it. i want us to have a relationship. i havent told him yet i am leaving in 2 months... ADVICE?

This is rather dishonest of you. Sorry, but it is. If you want to have a fling, do it. If you want a real relationship, then make a commitment. But you can't have a real relationship in two months, and it is dishonest of you to pretend that you can.

It may be that this is why a lot of guys can't commit.

 

[Experiencedguy]

Forget it and drop him. Unless so you're so horny all you want is a quick fuck, because that is all he wants. I read your message, did you? He is giving all the signs of a guy who wants your body (when it is convienent for him), and could care less about you the person.

I'm certainly not saying there is anything wrong with casual sex (Lord knows, I've had much more than my fair share), but it sounds like you want more and he doesn't. With two months left, you should have plenty of other opportunites.

 

[BertrandRussell]

Ok, ok...I won't give you grief about cheating OR being dishonest...

You want to have a relationship in two months. It won't work. Just settle for getting laid. Of all the things that you seem to want, that is the only one that you can accomplish in the time that you have.

Forget about who was supposed to call who. Get some condoms, then call him.

 

[juicypeachxx]

omg those are awesome... im glad i posted !!
any more suggestions?? please keep em coming i love it! if he doesnt call me i will have to call him to tell him look cant we have a quickie relationship cos im leaving in 2 months you can handle that, ya? but im not telling him i dont wanna go all the way, unless if i'm drinking in which case sometimes i get all confessional, which i hate.
And No there arent lots of takers for sex becos i am shy and i dont have friends here. you would think it would be easier to get laid in this town!! LOL.

 

[geronimo_appleby]

take him to a seedy hotel and video the sordid scene and then post pics on here.

... or it didn't happen.

forget the whole thing. you're going to fuck his head if you don't fuck him.

you're coming across [to me] as selfish in extremis. grow up. what about your partner and his?

imagine the scene, you get dosed up and pass it on to whoever you're attached to.

 

[Cathleen]

Having read your posts my question is, how do you find your way home everyday? Good grief girl, this is amazingly childlike, get a grip, be honest, use your brain and make a decision, any decision!




I wish you were closer to someplace in Canada, then you could take care of a dysfunctional never-sexed, over-thinking-sex neurotic... (I know it makes no sense to you, please pardon my selfishness by sparing me a blurt. For that I owe you.)

 

[fuckmeat]

Ok, everyone's covered the moral stupidity and immaturity of this idea so I'm just going to focus on the possibility that your stupidity will get you raped, killed or infected with something ghastly.

If you do meet this guy, make sure it's in a public place. Get a girlfriend or somebody to call you during the date to make sure you're fine and agree a failsafe phrase. This is a specific phrase or word like 'everything's wonderful' that actually means you're in trouble but you can't say so. Make sure the gf knows where you're staying or what hotel room you'll be in. Don't be afraid to walk away if he's not what you expect or your gut feeling is that this is a bad idea. Listen to your gut, don't pour too much vino into it. If he gets you a drink, accompany him and watch it being served. Also be careful of leaving drinks unattended when you visit the bathroom.

Do not be persuaded to go to his place, his car or a park. This has to happen somewhere neutral like a hotel, where there are lots of people you can run screaming to if necessary.

Make sure he wears a condom for all sexual contact. You can get some STDs like chlamydia from unprotected oral sex.

 

[geronimo_appleby]

there's also the, 'who really gives a fuck?' angle too.

 

[Adakgirl]

If you talked about just meeting for sex, and you really only want to mess around, but your not going to tell him that all you want to do is mess around and not really have sex....then you are putting yourself in a potentially really bad situation should you meet him in real life. He will think you are meeting him for sex, you have been teasing him on the phone talking dirty ect, you are misleading him. This is not only wrong but it's a good idea at all

 

[juicypeachxx]

What? Meet him in real life? I HAVE met him in real life, i know him... And i have met someone from LIt chat too and i didnt end up raped or killed: It was amazing.
And Cathleen thanks for saying I seem so dumb etc. Yes i am selfish yes i am immature... I never said i was perfect. But I asked for advice not scrutiny and criticism from people that try to make themsleves seem cool & smart on the board!

 

[PublicAffection]

Whether you know him in real life or not - it sounds as if you:

1) told him you wanted to get together for casual sex
2) dropped a bomb that you really wanted an emotional attachment
3) have continued to allude to meeting for sex
4) really have no intention of having sex with him - just want to fool around

If this guy has half a brain, he will figure out that you are sending mixed signals and get tired of dealing with it. This will either get him frustrated to the point where you no longer hear from him, or will push him to push YOU to do more than you are really comfortable with because you already said you would do it.

At some point you'll have to realize that what you are doing with this man (not to mention your ex-boyfriend who I understand you to say you may be getting back together with) is a bad idea and is putting you in a situation that cannot end well.

 

[Cathleen]

What? Meet him in real life? I HAVE met him in real life, i know him... And i have met someone from LIt chat too and i didnt end up raped or killed: It was amazing.
And Cathleen thanks for saying I seem so dumb etc. Yes i am selfish yes i am immature... I never said i was perfect. But I asked for advice not scrutiny and criticism from people that try to make themsleves seem cool & smart on the board!

I'm sorry I hurt your feelings, juicy. The way you presented yourself and your information/request is rather all over the place, IMO of course. It's difficult to decipher your posts since there's a lack of punctuation, run on sentences don't help. Clearly your exuberance was expressed but a little more structure would have helped me. But that is my problem. I don't try to be anything but myself on the board, perhaps lack of sleep (going on over 24 hours now) got in the way of my generally nice manner. I hope you'll forgive me.

My advice given above is the same, be honest, use your head and make your decision.

 

[infinity706]

As someone that's probably had more affairs than anyone else here, I even think you need to be careful with this. The first thing is, you probably shouldn't be starting a 2 month relationship. If you want a bit of intimacy and cuddling, that's fine, but you need to make it clear, up front that there will be no relationship other than being friends with benefits. The second thing is, make sure you use condoms. You don't want diseases or pregnancy and STD testing would probably eat up too much of the time you have for this fling. Use them for oral, anal, and vaginal and get some kind of plastic wrap or order some female condoms of the internet to use for oral on you. (just don't use male and female condoms at once because they'll stick together and tear) Seriously, if you're going to cheat, you at least owe it to yourselves and your present/future partners not to risk your or their safety. Also, if you're going to cheat, don't do anything stupid like having his number in your phone or keeping around explicit messages. You also shouldn't be calling each other at all, once you go back to your boyfriend and if you're going to have any contact such as email, you should have some kind of code set up to make it sound innocent. Ok, there's your course on cheating 101. I don't personally recommend cheating, but if you're going to do it, at least be smart about it. Other than that, just have fun and enjoy yourselves, the sex can be awesome when you're cheating, too.

 

[subwannabe]

Cathleen took the words out of my mouth. What are you, 14?

 

[fgarvb1]

You are cheating.

You are doing the crime you might as well enjoy it like you should.

 

[geronimo_appleby]

What? Meet him in real life? I HAVE met him in real life, i know him... And i have met someone from LIt chat too and i didnt end up raped or killed: It was amazing.
And Cathleen thanks for saying I seem so dumb etc. Yes i am selfish yes i am immature... I never said i was perfect. But I asked for advice not scrutiny and criticism from people that try to make themsleves seem cool & smart on the board!

fuck off.

 

[juicypeachxx]

ya

keep trying G you still dont look smart or cool...

 

[human_male]

I think if you want a relationship with the guy you should hold off on the sex.

 

[softkisses]

Having read your posts my question is, how do you find your way home everyday? Good grief girl, this is amazingly childlike, get a grip, be honest, use your brain and make a decision, any decision!




I wish you were closer to someplace in Canada, then you could take care of a dysfunctional never-sexed, over-thinking-sex neurotic... (I know it makes no sense to you, please pardon my selfishness by sparing me a blurt. For that I owe you.)

What she said!!!!!

Do yourself and BOTH guys a favor, don't get involved with either of them and take some time to work on a little personal growth! Geez!!!!

 

[PhilGarlic]

just do it

If you are horny for the guy and he is not cheating, go fuck the guys brains out, you know thats what you want.
He will love it!
If you get back together with the first guy tell him nothing. Can you live with that?

 

[cryforme1v]

omg those are awesome... im glad i posted !!
any more suggestions?? please keep em coming i love it! if he doesnt call me i will have to call him to tell him look cant we have a quickie relationship cos im leaving in 2 months you can handle that, ya? but im not telling him i dont wanna go all the way, unless if i'm drinking in which case sometimes i get all confessional, which i hate.
And No there arent lots of takers for sex becos i am shy and i dont have friends here. you would think it would be easier to get laid in this town!! LOL.

no offense but how old are you?