What pissed you off today? Mark II

[FurryFury]

*HUGS*

Gawd...I'm the same way right now! What's the point of even eating?

Mine?

What the fuck? I know the pain is making you cranky, but it's getting reeeeealy old, taking it out on me.
Stop trying to be so fuckin' righteous.

 

[MeekMe]

Who closed early?

The bank I work for.

 

[Ropebunny]

My favourite columnist (an outspoken feminist) is moving papers - from a conservative one to a more liberal publication.

I feel that she has done a great service in challenging some of the outdated and misogynistic ideals of some of the other columnists at this particular paper. I'm hoping that the decision to leave was hers and her hand wasn't forced.

She did, at least leave with an awesomely satirical final column, the link to which is here: New year resolutions for feminists

 

[midwestyankee]

My favourite columnist (an outspoken feminist) is moving papers - from a conservative one to a more liberal publication.

I feel that she has done a great service in challenging some of the outdated and misogynistic ideals of some of the other columnists at this particular paper. I'm hoping that the decision to leave was hers and her hand wasn't forced.

She did, at least leave with an awesomely satirical final column, the link to which is here: New year resolutions for feminists

Very funny, in a sardonic kind of way. I predict, however, that some right-wing nutjobs in America will not see the irony in her post and will present it as evidence that they were right about women all along. They're the same bozos who regularly quote The Onion in utter outrage.

 

[MeekMe]

I can't count on or trust most of my coworkers. It's time for a new location.

 

[smallgirl]

Hubby..... Not my fucking fault you went I at 3 instead of 12. I was cleaning house around your "supposedly " work schedule.

not my fault you couldn't sit on the damn couch and watch TV cause I was cleaning the living room
Fuck you.

 

[Loverskitten]

My birthday, it always sucks. I hate it. Glad it's past (said in Eeyore voice)

 

[IrisAlthea]

My birthday, it always sucks. I hate it. Glad it's past (said in Eeyore voice)

Happy Notbirthdayanymore then! (said in a Tiggers voice I'm afraid - sorry)

 

[Vixandra]

Insomnia sucks. Damn winter sleep schedule- my circadian rhythm says I should be working nights these days, not possible with a 14 month old. Sighs.

 

[samantha_22]

boss bringing me more work, far too busy reading this forum...

 

[seela]

Bad news really doesn't travel fast in my family.

Someone died on Christmas Eve and I found out about it today. Not a happy day.

 

[IrisAlthea]

Bad news really doesn't travel fast in my family.

Someone died on Christmas Eve and I found out about it today. Not a happy day.

I'm sorry to hear that Seela!

My parents have a history of not forwarding bad news, because they didn't want to ruin chistmas/birthday/vacation.
It's just worse when you finally find out, isn't it?

 

[seela]

I'm sorry to hear that Seela!

My parents have a history of not forwarding bad news, because they didn't want to ruin chistmas/birthday/vacation.
It's just worse when you finally find out, isn't it?

It started off as not wanting to ruin Christmas, then mom assumed that my sister had already told me.

The one who died was my nephew's dad. It's not like I was super close with him, as he's not with my sister and I've only seen him once a year on my nephew's birthday, but it would have been nice to know... My parents and nephew came over today and I asked my nephew if he and his dad have made any progress building the RC car he'd told me about before Christmas.

And that's how I found out. Not a nice moment, for any of us, really. My sister just now called me and wondered how it could be that I didn't know - she has posted nothing but RIP-y things on Facebook ever since she found out what had happened. Well, my last status update on FB is from Christmas - two years ago. That probably should have tipped her off that I'm not particularly active there, and I really don't think FB is the proper channel to spread that kind of news anyways.

 

[IrisAlthea]

It started off as not wanting to ruin Christmas, then mom assumed that my sister had already told me.

The one who died was my nephew's dad. It's not like I was super close with him, as he's not with my sister and I've only seen him once a year on my nephew's birthday, but it would have been nice to know... My parents and nephew came over today and I asked my nephew if he and his dad have made any progress building the RC car he'd told me about before Christmas.

And that's how I found out. Not a nice moment, for any of us, really. My sister just now called me and wondered how it could be that I didn't know - she has posted nothing but RIP-y things on Facebook ever since she found out what had happened. Well, my last status update on FB is from Christmas - two years ago. That probably should have tipped her off that I'm not particularly active there, and I really don't think FB is the proper channel to spread that kind of news anyways.

Ugh, What a horrible way to find out.
I hear you about the facebook thing.

 

[BiBunny]

I am so tired of having to listen to my parents bitch about each other. This has been going on since I was, oh, 8 or 9 years old. At this point, I can repeat every single complaint verbatim. I get to hear every story at least twice, once (or more) from each of them, and then a long dissection of every teeny tiny bit of it. So. Tired. I wonder how much time I waste per month listening to the same old complaints over and over and over again. Is it any wonder I've spent my whole life feeling like I was the parent, and they were the children? *Sigh*

 

[Stella_Omega]

Someone tells me; "Learn to be sympathetic, learn how to express sympathy."

I say; "For an aspie, that's like telling an elephant to figure out how to fly."

They say; "Make some little wings, try them on for size."

I say; "Do you know how much MASS an elephant has?"

Stunned silence.

I'm sorry. I know it must seem obstructive. But it's so damn frustrating, on my side.

So, I'm googling for "How to teach an aspie to express sympathy." and I'm coming up with two main things; one is that you might have to teach an aspie child how to feel empathy, which isn't nearly as true as some people might think, and the other is about how neurotypicals have a hard time understanding that aspies are empathic because we don't express it in neurotypical ways, which is why the first point up there.

But I cannot expect this person to ever, ever, be willing to put the effort into that understanding, and they are reaching the end of their life. I'd like some recipes, please.

 

[Ropebunny]

Someone tells me; "Learn to be sympathetic, learn how to express sympathy."

I say; "For an aspie, that's like telling an elephant to figure out how to fly."

They say; "Make some little wings, try them on for size."

I say; "Do you know how much MASS an elephant has?"

Stunned silence.

I'm sorry. I know it must seem obstructive. But it's so damn frustrating, on my side.

So, I'm googling for "How to teach an aspie to express sympathy." and I'm coming up with two main things; one is that you might have to teach an aspie child how to feel empathy, which isn't nearly as true as some people might think, and the other is about how neurotypicals have a hard time understanding that aspies are empathic because we don't express it in neurotypical ways, which is why the first point up there.

But I cannot expect this person to ever, ever, be willing to put the effort into that understanding, and they are reaching the end of their life. I'd like some recipes, please.

For what it's worth I personally feel sympathy is an over-rated, non-productive social construct. Empathy is important but you have that.

If this helps, when I think of sympathy I think of sad-looking faces, words like "I'm sorry to hear that", 'helpful' suggestions on how to improve the situation and some prompt subject changing because sympathy gets awkward pretty quickly.

 

[Vixandra]

Someone tells me; "Learn to be sympathetic, learn how to express sympathy."

I say; "For an aspie, that's like telling an elephant to figure out how to fly."

They say; "Make some little wings, try them on for size."

I say; "Do you know how much MASS an elephant has?"

Stunned silence.

I'm sorry. I know it must seem obstructive. But it's so damn frustrating, on my side.

So, I'm googling for "How to teach an aspie to express sympathy." and I'm coming up with two main things; one is that you might have to teach an aspie child how to feel empathy, which isn't nearly as true as some people might think, and the other is about how neurotypicals have a hard time understanding that aspies are empathic because we don't express it in neurotypical ways, which is why the first point up there.

But I cannot expect this person to ever, ever, be willing to put the effort into that understanding, and they are reaching the end of their life. I'd like some recipes, please.

Are they looking for you to commiserate with them or to just acknowledge their struggle(s)?


I wasn't exactly sure on what your issue is but I read this and think it's a little clearer- http://musingsofanaspie.com/2013/01/17/the-empathy-conundrum/

She points out that:

Empathy, in the most basic sense, is the ability to understand and share an emotional state with another person.
...
Sympathy is a concern for the wellbeing of another person.

Perhaps you could explain that you express your concern over their well being in XYZ ways and that you do care.

 

[LallyH]

So far today:

customer on the phone - can he bring a job in NOW for us to do NOW because he needs it NOW....oh, and by the way, his artwork isn't great so can we make it wonderful for him for free, NOW

staff member number one (early shift) returned from two days' sick absence, in tears about family problems and threatening suicide so need to get her to the GP this morning

staff member number two (late shift) has injured his back playing football (he's 52...when will he give it up ) over the weekend, can't come into work, so I need to rope in a volunteer to change shifts immediately to cover health and safety. Normally I would just ask the rest of the late shift to start earlier, but of course the guy's phone is switched off, isn't it?

and it's not even 8.15 am.....

It's going to be a very long, long day....one more issue, and my usual good humour and saint-like patience will fly out of the window...

 

[gypsy*seer]

Angry violins...

 

[Stella_Omega]

Are they looking for you to commiserate with them or to just acknowledge their struggle(s)?

They are looking for me to speak the language they have in their head. You know, like women who read romance novels and want a man who is just like that, and she never has to tell him when to bring flowers?

I wasn't exactly sure on what your issue is but I read this and think it's a little clearer- http://musingsofanaspie.com/2013/01/17/the-empathy-conundrum/

That's really good! And I agree with her, there is a recent trend to insist that aspies all all about excessive emotion. Which is as wrong in its way as the claim that aspies can't understand emotions at all. I'm gonna read the fuck out of that blog, thank you very, very much.

Perhaps you could explain that you express your concern over their well being in XYZ ways and that you do care.

This person doesn't care very much about other ways people express themselves-- they want their way. They are old and tired and, I think, chock full of PTSD-- just from living through the 20th century and all of it's changes...

 

[Vixandra]

We don't really need sciatic nerves, do we? Kinda wanna rip my right one out today, damn thing hurts like lightning from knee to back.

 

[Bramblethorn]

My partner and I took our dog in to be euthanased yesterday. He was old and sick. He had difficulty standing up and he couldn't find his food or water unless I guided him to it. He'd lost a lot of weight and his kidneys were starting to go, and he was miserable in last week's heat wave. I know it was time, but I still feel like a horrible selfish person, like I betrayed someone who trusted me with his life.

He was such a lovely guy. A friend told us "he was the first dog I ever met that I wasn't scared of". It's been two days and I'm still crying like a baby.

 

[Sir_Winston54]

My partner and I took our dog in to be euthanased yesterday. He was old and sick. He had difficulty standing up and he couldn't find his food or water unless I guided him to it. He'd lost a lot of weight and his kidneys were starting to go, and he was miserable in last week's heat wave. I know it was time, but I still feel like a horrible selfish person, like I betrayed someone who trusted me with his life.

He was such a lovely guy. A friend told us "he was the first dog I ever met that I wasn't scared of". It's been two days and I'm still crying like a baby.

I felt the same way the first couple of times we had to put dog or cat down, but came to realize that as they trusted me with their life, they trusted me to make a rational decision about when it was time for them to leave it.

(Poorly worded - I hope you understand what I'm trying to say.)

 

[IrisAlthea]

My partner and I took our dog in to be euthanased yesterday. He was old and sick. He had difficulty standing up and he couldn't find his food or water unless I guided him to it. He'd lost a lot of weight and his kidneys were starting to go, and he was miserable in last week's heat wave. I know it was time, but I still feel like a horrible selfish person, like I betrayed someone who trusted me with his life.

He was such a lovely guy. A friend told us "he was the first dog I ever met that I wasn't scared of". It's been two days and I'm still crying like a baby.

I'm so sorry for your loss.
It still feels horrible even when you know it was the right decision.