What makes a lover good at ...

[ohwhynot77]

I've read a few threads and posts where men will say, "She gave the best blow jobs ever!" or "Her pussy was better than any other..." or "She was the best lover I ever had..."

So my question is ... WHO was the best at WHAT and WHY? I want to know, what made them the best at whatever it was they were so good at?

I'll be honest, I'm always looking to improve my, ahem, skills ... (I'm a classic Type A with a wicked competitive streak and a need to please) ... so if I can find out what makes someone the BEST at anything, I want the "secret!"

 

[CountCunninglvr]

Hmmm...

I don't know about the best lover in an absolute sense, but in my mind what has made me perceive one lover as better than the other was the ability to make the sex a mental experience as well as physical one.

Subtle examples of this that I've experienced:

-Asking me how being stroked, blown, or riden feels even though she clearly knows I'm loving it from causing me to breathe heavily or moan. This just makes whatever is being done to me all the more exciting.

-vividly describing what she likes about what she's doing to me either as she's doing it or before.

-Any form of teasing can enhance things for me by causing arousal and excitement to build.

This is probably not everything I've noticed, but it's a start.

Basically do whatever you can to get the man mentally engaged in the sex, plant little thoughts in his head while you ride him instead of just riding him. This is as clear as I can get my understanding. Hope this helps.

 

[molegrande]

..........

 

[bob53]

A totally genuine desire to please.

Openness to try just about anything without judgements.

Ability to laugh when ideas go awry.
Creativity for those occasions when a new idea flops.

Totally being in the moment with your partner.
Realizing it does not have to "look" a certain way and just going for it however it turns out.
Being totally open to be able to receive pleasure.
This can trip up a lot of people as I know I receive a lot of pleasure just being able to revel in her pleasure.