What Just Irritates Me

[FallenMorgan]

I noticed on Lit that alot of stories feature a main male character that's basically some sort of typical 'stud'. I hate these stories with some typical 'everyman' who's 6'4, with 200 lbs of muscle, a big dick, and a general liking for boobs and ass and whatnot.

I'd like to see more stories that are less like that all the damn time, I mean, no "Hi my name's Morgan, my girlfriend's measurements are sth-sth-sth and she has 36D tits"

Anybody else annoyed by these stories? I'm currently writing a story for the celebrity section that's not one of those stories, and I hope they add more less like that type I mentioned.

 

[DeeZire]

I hate these stories with some typical 'everyman' who's 6'4, with 200 lbs of muscle, a big dick, and a general liking for boobs and ass and whatnot.

You might look for the 'E' symbol, which means the editors liked the story. There's also a 'my favorite author' thread on either the 'story discussion' board or the 'story feedback' board'. Sometimes you can find good ones there. Also, if you find an author you like, you can look on their 'favorites' list to find other authors who rise above the crowd.

I've read several that fit your description, but ever since my brain started turning to swiss cheese, I can't remember the authors.

Wait! Check out 'Suzanne by the Sea'. Definitely different, in a good way.

 

[Handprints]

I hate these stories with some typical 'everyman' who's 6'4, with 200 lbs of muscle, a big dick, and a general liking for boobs and ass and whatnot.

Amen, although I'll make an exception for stories about guys getting more female attention - from fitter females - because they've begun going to the gym and doing the work. A touch of effort, a touch of reward - always more realistic and morally uplifting (within a Literotica moral context, natch).

H

 

[Stella_Omega]

My main male character is a bit high-strung, (a musician) a bit on the short side, (5'6"-ish) is multi-ethnic, multi-kinked, romantic. His cock is not especially big. It's what's in his head that makes him good in bed.

How's that?

 

[S-Des]

Check out Seperate Lives by Longhorn07, or North Shore by MYErotica. Both are long, but well worth the read and about normal people (and not so coincidentally, both are among the most popular in their categories). I try to make my characters believable, but tend to make the women too perfect. Subtlety can be tricky to find.

 

[gauchecritic]

Here in the AH you'll find very few authors that actually do the tape measure description, or the mirror scene, or the 'body of a twenty year old' for older people.

I can't recall a single one of my characters that have anywhere near a perfect body except Abigail Slaughter. And there isn't actually any sex in that story. Only breakfast.

Now I come to think of it I tend to write imperfect bodies for the females and virtually no description at all for the males. Except the 11" cock of course .

(note to self. Include male descriptions more often, where necessary)

 

[Boxlicker101]

On my first person stories, I pattern the protag after myself. I don't give much description, except for tallish, late forties, etc. He is a steady consumer of Viagra. The women are sometimes beautiful and sexy, but not always.

 

[Le Jacquelope]

You might look for the 'E' symbol, which means the editors liked the story. There's also a 'my favorite author' thread on either the 'story discussion' board or the 'story feedback' board'. Sometimes you can find good ones there. Also, if you find an author you like, you can look on their 'favorites' list to find other authors who rise above the crowd.

I've read several that fit your description, but ever since my brain started turning to swiss cheese, I can't remember the authors.

Wait! Check out 'Suzanne by the Sea'. Definitely different, in a good way.

Your troll story has just been 5 bombed. LOL.

 

[Trombonus]

A wise woman once told me long ago that I should leave as much of a characters physical appearance up to the reader's imagination, so I try to do that as much as possible (unless the situation calls for specifics).

Thanks Aurora!

 

[Rumple Foreskin]

There is a tendency, especially among newer writers, to creat "super" characters. After a while, most discover that characters with flaws can be a lot more interesting.

I've used characters who were supposed to be over sixty and had pot bellies, others who were blind or missing a leg. You might take at look a the Romance category for more variety in characters.

Rumple Foreskin

 

[TheeGoatPig]

I noticed on Lit that alot of stories feature a main male character that's basically some sort of typical 'stud'. I hate these stories with some typical 'everyman' who's 6'4, with 200 lbs of muscle, a big dick, and a general liking for boobs and ass and whatnot.

I can't help it. That describes me. I am 6'-4" and 220 pounds (with a belly, but I would be 200 if I lost that )

Though I do tend to tone down my male leads a bit closer to the 6'-0" mark, around 180 pounds and an above average dick instead of huge. I can't help but write about big breasted women though. They are my favorites.

Typical? Yes. But that is me, so I have to live with it.

 

[TxRad]

A lot of my male characters are based on me, which is a dirty old man. My females in most cases are based on pictures I've come across that yell to tell a story. Are any of my characters perfect? I hope not.

In fact my story Krista deals with imperfections in a BDSM way.... (Blatant Plug)

 

[FallenMorgan]

The main character in my story I'm writing isn't only 5'9" and skinny, but also dosn't really like sex all that much, so that's a real departure from other character descriptions.

I'll look into those stories you mentioned, thnx

 

[Stella_Omega]

The main character in my story I'm writing isn't only 5'9" and skinny, but also dosn't really like sex all that much, so that's a real departure from other character descriptions.

I'll look into those stories you mentioned, thnx

He DOESN'T LIKE SEX?!?!?

I hope some woman shows him how to be enthusiastic about it and all?

 

[Jenny_Jackson]

I don't think any of my male characters fit that discription.

Actually, most of them are total dorks

 

[TxRad]

I don't think any of my male characters fit that discription.

Actually, most of them are total dorks

No! No I won't! No I won't say it! No! No! No!

 

[FallenMorgan]

He DOESN'T LIKE SEX?!?!?

I hope some woman shows him how to be enthusiastic about it and all?

Sort of. The story is about Paris Hilton, it's called "Angel in Darkness", but my character in it dosn't like thinking of her as 'sexy' all that much even though she likes being 'sexy' for him (the character is basically me but better looking). But then Nicky is introduced to the story in episode two, and he's "enthusiastic" with her.

It's a first for lit: a celebrity/fan romance story basically.

 

[TheeGoatPig]

I don't think any of my male characters fit that discription.

Actually, most of them are total dorks

Your gardening story kind of does. I love that story

 

[Jenny_Jackson]

Your gardening story kind of does. I love that story

I don't know about "Eduardo" in Horticultural Sex. He seems kind of dorky to me. He never did figure out "Wilma" was getting off.

But thanks for the comment, Thee

 

[TheeGoatPig]

I don't know about "Eduardo" in Horticultural Sex. He seems kind of dorky to me. He never did figure out "Wilma" was getting off.

But thanks for the comment, Thee

Well, he was working out in the hot sun all day, and she was a bit of a loon...

Maybe he was just gay?

Why do I always feel the need to make up excuses for people?

 

[DeeZire]

Your troll story has just been 5 bombed. LOL.

Thank you LT. Now that you mention it, both the Troll story and Sveni, the Viking Rock Star feature male characters who are the antithesis of heroic. Both are in the satire catagory.

 

[BlackShanglan]

Amen, although I'll make an exception for stories about guys getting more female attention - from fitter females - because they've begun going to the gym and doing the work. A touch of effort, a touch of reward - always more realistic and morally uplifting (within a Literotica moral context, natch).

H

*laugh* Just goes to show that different tastes make the world turn. I've seen too many gym-obsessed stories to give even a moderate mention of working out a fair shake. Call it a personal weakness. I have nearly the same level of gut-instinct aversion as I have to the mention of a mirror.

But then, I'm not very body-oriented unless the bodies are unusual. If I get much past hair color and a general indication of height, it's usually because someone is hunchbacked or alien or an unexpected gender or something like that.

 

[FallenMorgan]

*laugh* Just goes to show that different tastes make the world turn. I've seen too many gym-obsessed stories to give even a moderate mention of working out a fair shake. Call it a personal weakness. I have nearly the same level of gut-instinct aversion as I have to the mention of a mirror.

But then, I'm not very body-oriented unless the bodies are unusual. If I get much past hair color and a general indication of height, it's usually because someone is hunchbacked or alien or an unexpected gender or something like that.

I will admit to falling for that thing, but then when I rewrote the story, I reduced it down to this first sentence:

I was nineteen back then - and not necessarily your typical nineteen year old. I had sorta ear length black hair and black clothes - I guess I was a sort of ‛emo‛ type

I mention my height in the story at a later point, and then my weight in episode three.

 

[Stella_Omega]

I was nineteen back then - and not necessarily your typical nineteen year old. I had sorta ear length black hair and black clothes - I guess I was a sort of ‛emo‛ type

Sounds typical to me...

 

[Handprints]

*laugh* Just goes to show that different tastes make the world turn. I've seen too many gym-obsessed stories to give even a moderate mention of working out a fair shake. Call it a personal weakness. I have nearly the same level of gut-instinct aversion as I have to the mention of a mirror.

Yes, on reflection, I'm willing to accept that "hits gym, bulks up, get laid" bears every last hallmark of a cliche. Which forces me, very unwillingly, to examine the possibility that 40-somethings who give up 90 minutes of their valuable time every day to try to shift a higher tonnage than last week's effort might also be something of a cliche...

That's it: I'm dumping the wife, buying a Porsche and looking into Rogaine. If I'm already having a mid-life crisis, I might as well do it right...

Best,
H (staring intently at a mirror, wondering if any muscle groups need special attention today...)