What is your Funniest Story?

[hbk4894]

mine has got to be when me and my mate were watching Waterloo Road and one of our school friends suddenly popped up on the show , my mate fell of the bed laughing.

 

[oggbashan]

Two of them:

http://www.literotica.com/s/the-literotica-olympics-day-17

http://www.literotica.com/s/the-worst-chain-story-ever-ch-01

 

[PayDay]

Well...

"Bitch I understand that, but if you don't stop crying right now we are both going to be arrested."

 

[oggbashan]

Real Life?

When in the Boy Scouts I help my troop to win a Regional Trophy at a Scout Sports Day by coming third in the hundred yard race.

I had already won points in the Hammer Throw and Shot Put, but was not recognised as a sprint runner. I was the only Scout in our troop of the right age for that hundred yard race.

Other troops must have had the same problem. I came third because there were only three entrants. I was fifteen seconds behind the Scout who came first.

But I got the points for the third place.

 

[neci]

once upon a time, manu's balls bounced down the street looking for a place to eat. i opened my door and in they came, never again to return the same.

 

[erostwo]

Use a condom for a sun screen!

 

[lemonbread]

So, I could go with the one where I was high on dentist meds after a wisdom tooth extraction, and I threw my boyfriend's phone out of the moving vehicle on the way home. Rural area. An hour from home. Never found the phone. But I locked him out of the vehicle. So he was stuck outside with no keys and no phone and I didn't let him back in for like a half an hour. When we got he was mad at me, and I remembered none of it.

Or the time I was at the dentist and i had a thing holding my mouth open, and a drool bib on, and some kid decided to pull the fire alarm. That was great. Totally not embarrassing to stand outside in a group of people drooling all over yourself like a total idiot.

Or the time I convinced a guy next to me on a plane that I had AIDS because I was convinced he was going to rape me.

 

[Que]

I am trying to script that dialog in my head...

"So....my Doctor has me on a cocktail of nucleoside reverse transcriptase inhibitors and protease inhibitors. It seems to be working well at preventing viral replication..."

 

[marshalt]

I'm washing my hands in a gas station bathroom when these two kids come in. I'd say they were probably around ten. One of them says, "Haha! You gotta use the one for little kids!"

(For you ladies out there, in men's bathrooms, typically there is one urinal lower to the floor.)

Without missing a beat, the other boy replies, "Yeah, I need to use this one, otherwise my dick would be in the water!"

 

[1sickbastard]

My funniest story is a bit of a joke.

 

[albertaboy]

Quite a few years ago I was driving in rural Ontario and stopped at the only gas station/store/restaurant for 100 km in either direction.

Had to piss like a racehorse, so I an standing at the urinal with this old guy beside me when I started to fart and it lasted about 5 seconds.

I looked at him said excuse me, he said no worries, that's what he had come into the bathroom to do.

 

[Que]

That reminds me of when I drove a friend to his elderly aunt's funeral in the country because he was coming off off 4 12 hour night shifts and wasn't safe to drive.

I don't know anyone there, mostly elderly people, many of whom had driven hundreds of miles to be there. I go to use the restroom and there are two octogenarian gentlemen in the cramped restroom assisting each-other out of their Sunday-go-to-meeting best and into their traveling clothes. Neither had very good range of motion or dexterity, but between them, they managed.

It was sort of sweet and awkward all at the same time.