What do you do when you've fucked up

[celiaKitten]

and unintentionally hurt someone you love?

 

[Guest]

Ouch.
I apologize. Cook their favorite foods.
Run a bubble bath for them. And, beg for forgiveness.

 

[Kymberley]

change my nick and start back over as Virgin status




Seriously though, if I can resolve the issue by undoing something I did wrong, then I would do it. If I opened my mouth when I should have kept it shut, I attempt to smooth the edges.

Apologies are not going to undo damage, but might make them feel better if they can accept it and you are sincere.

Never do it again.

 

[OUTSIDER]

Say sorry and try to sound like you mean it, then if they will/want to listen explain why you did what you did...........and if it's a girl you did it to take her out shoe shopping.


Ain't nothing like new shoes to put a smile on a ladies face, especially if she knows it's cost you an arm and a leg to.

 

[SweetCherry]

Well, being that I did this not too long ago myself, I apologized profusely, begged forgiveness and have been extra-attentive since then. I also make a mental note for future reference to NOT do it again.

 

[Angelus]

Apologize profusely.... tell them you will do whatever they ask to make it up to them. And then promise never to do it again; and keep that promise.

 

[sexy-girl]

sorrys important but learning not to make the same mistake again is what really counts because anyone can say sorry


if the person love's you they will forgive you i know it sucks though when i've hurt the person i love it actually hurts me a lot longer then the person i hurt ... try not to get over guilty too if that makes sense ... because you have to move past bad times you cant dwell on them

 

[Fly_On_Wall]

I tend to over apologies till they say they are feeling okay even though i know they aren't

then I try to keep away from the subject for awhile and 'start over' as it were but I always have that lingering in the back of my head so i can avoide doing it again later. or so at a later time when it's right i can bring it up again and resolve it (this isn't always posible though)

 

[KillerMuffin]

Admit that you were wrong.

Apologize, sincerely, but don't keep apologizing until they say okay just to make you go away.

Explain why you did it without offering excuses. This means giving them a clear reason without trying to excuse why you did it or take the responsibility for what you did off of your shoulders and onto something else. Why is always a question when you hurt someone.

Take the consequences without a hissy fit, crying jags, or otherwise. There are always consequences.

This works in all arenas of life, believe it or not.

 

[cymbidia]

What Muff said with this addition:
Look them in the eyes while you're apologizing. And no waterworks, either, or any other methods that will work toward you "getting off lightly".

If you're sincerely sorry, it will show.

And don't keep apologizing forever, either.
That's just annoying.

 

[celiaKitten]

It's my best friend, and I've apoligized - unfortunately they are really busy today - so the discussion is tabled until tomorrow.

Thanks for the advice everyone, as common sense as it is - when you feel like a complete ass you can't focus on anything but that.