Captainnumnuts
Literotica Guru
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- Feb 17, 2018
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- 1,630
Yeah. I just went there.
Then there's candy bars and chocolate. It's all relevant somehow.
Then there's candy bars and chocolate. It's all relevant somehow.
Weird stuff we do when drunk/high...
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Captainnumnuts
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Feb 17, 2018
- Posts
- 1,630
This woman, an exes not from Texas, and I lived together briefly. We argued constantly, but when we had fun - we had a shitload of fun. Didn't care who was around. 1 night, we came home from bar hopping, giggling as we poured ourselves into the living room. Then we helped each other into the B/R taking the scenic route.
Just as we were testing the bed springs, I suddenly got the urge to eat something. I excused myself. Then zig zagged into the kitchen. The only thing available in the fridge was a candy bar. So I ate it. Then ran into the bathroom to worship the porcelain God. I heard her laughing cuz it was really funny. As I stared into the toilet, I started thinking creepy stuff - like if there was a snake somewhere working it's way to the toilet. I quickly stood up, suddenly sober, then rinsed my mouth w/mouthwash.
I went back to the bed, where she welcomed me w/open arms. We had great sex that night and the next morning. And the next night and morning after that.
I never told her about the candy bar.
Just as we were testing the bed springs, I suddenly got the urge to eat something. I excused myself. Then zig zagged into the kitchen. The only thing available in the fridge was a candy bar. So I ate it. Then ran into the bathroom to worship the porcelain God. I heard her laughing cuz it was really funny. As I stared into the toilet, I started thinking creepy stuff - like if there was a snake somewhere working it's way to the toilet. I quickly stood up, suddenly sober, then rinsed my mouth w/mouthwash.
I went back to the bed, where she welcomed me w/open arms. We had great sex that night and the next morning. And the next night and morning after that.
I never told her about the candy bar.
Jada59
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Dec 28, 2017
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I went with two guy friends to a bar and they convinced me to try a Long Island iced tea. I had no idea that it was liquor. Tasted just like tea.
I saw a cute guy and kept trying to hit on him. My one friend kept begging me to stop and finally they dragged me out of there. I began going down the railroad tracks, singing and dancing.
Next day, I went to the new hair salon that my one male friend had suggested. And it turned out that the guy I had the appointment with was the guy I tried to pick up! Why my friend did not tell me this, I'll never know.
Hairdresser said something like... Now this is a bit awkward! Last time I saw you, you were singing and dancing on the railroad tracks. He then said I owed him and I should be his guinea pig. I agreed. He was like... Huh? I can do anything to you that I want? I told him he could. He was rather conservative the first time. But after that he gave me some (pardon the pun) cutting edge hairdos! I actually had other hairdressers stop me and ask who cut my hair because they had no clue how to do that cut.
Alas, he quit cutting hair and moved away. He was by far the best hairdresser ever. He was a year older than me and we were born in the same city, in another state. Our dads worked for the same company and we both moved here the same year.
I will say that he was very attractive but when I was sober, whatever spark had been there was no longer there.
I saw a cute guy and kept trying to hit on him. My one friend kept begging me to stop and finally they dragged me out of there. I began going down the railroad tracks, singing and dancing.
Next day, I went to the new hair salon that my one male friend had suggested. And it turned out that the guy I had the appointment with was the guy I tried to pick up! Why my friend did not tell me this, I'll never know.
Hairdresser said something like... Now this is a bit awkward! Last time I saw you, you were singing and dancing on the railroad tracks. He then said I owed him and I should be his guinea pig. I agreed. He was like... Huh? I can do anything to you that I want? I told him he could. He was rather conservative the first time. But after that he gave me some (pardon the pun) cutting edge hairdos! I actually had other hairdressers stop me and ask who cut my hair because they had no clue how to do that cut.
Alas, he quit cutting hair and moved away. He was by far the best hairdresser ever. He was a year older than me and we were born in the same city, in another state. Our dads worked for the same company and we both moved here the same year.
I will say that he was very attractive but when I was sober, whatever spark had been there was no longer there.
Hypoxia
doesn't watch television
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- Sep 7, 2013
- Posts
- 28,080
Is this one of those 'confession' threads for admitting all sorts of criminal activity that can be prosecuted later? Most of what I could say here falls in that category and I ain't dumb (or wasted) enough to blab. Let's just say that I still avoid certain jurisdictions. [/me looks wistfully toward Toronto and Las Cruces] And don't mention coconuts.
That story about the burro and three Bolivian dwarves is pure fabrication.
That story about the burro and three Bolivian dwarves is pure fabrication.
KingOfOregon
Really Experienced
- Joined
- Apr 3, 2018
- Posts
- 179
Having sex with the wrong people. I think that's probably the only thing I've ever done drunk that I shouldn't have done. Oh, and there was walking through town barefoot and getting arrested. But hey, that was just cuz I was the wrong guy in the wrong part of town. (No, that's not a race thing, it's a financial class thing.)
