Weddings, etc.

[SweetErika]

Now that we're firmly in the season, I've been thinking about weddings/commitment ceremonies and am curious to hear thoughts from others. A few things I've been wondering about, though answering all of these is certainly not necessary:

• The perception that "the wedding day is the most important day in a woman's life."
  -What do you think?
  -Is/was that true for you? If not, what would you consider to be the most important day in your life?
  -Did you always dream of the perfect wedding?
  -Men: Is the wedding that important to you, or not really a big deal?
  
  
• The average cost of a wedding is now around $26,000, and that's up 73% over the last 15 years according to this survey.
  -Is this a fair amount to spend on the occasion?
  -Was your wedding expensive, or fairly inexpensive? (I know these are subjective terms, so maybe you could give us a general ballpark or range if you're comfortable)
  -If you're married and had to do it all over again, what do you feel would be a reasonable amount to spend?
  -For those who have children, how much would you be willing to contribute/pay for their wedding?
  
  
• Any other thoughts, issues, questions, etc. on weddings/commitment ceremonies are welcome and appreciated!

 

[Eilan]

Now that we're firmly in the season, I've been thinking about weddings/commitment ceremonies and am curious to hear thoughts from others. A few things I've been wondering about, though answering all of these is certainly not necessary:

I'll answer all of your questions, except for the one addressed to men, but only because I don't want to blow my cover.

The perception that "the wedding day is the most important day in a woman's life."

What do you think?*cough*Bullshit*cough*

Is/was that true for you? If not, what would you consider to be the most important day in your life?Both times I was married, I was very happy. At the time of my first marriage, I certainly didn't anticipate that it would end in divorce.

I was happier when my kids were born; we chose to have them because of our of our love/commitment to each other.

Did you always dream of the perfect wedding?I did for a bit before my first marriage, but it quickly became obvious to me that I wouldn't be having a huge wedding. My father was opposed to it--but he would have been opposed no matter who my husband was going to be. I'm more okay with that now than I was when I was 20.

The average cost of a wedding is now around $26,000, and that's up 73% over the last 15 years according to this survey.

Is this a fair amount to spend on the occasion?Seems a lot to me. I'd rather have the $26,000 to help with housing.

Was your wedding expensive, or fairly inexpensive?Wedding #1 was more expensive than wedding #2. Both were pretty inexpensive.

If you're married and had to do it all over again, what do you feel would be a reasonable amount to spend?I'd do what I did the second time around--it was just the two of us, a minister, and his wife.

For those who have children, how much would you be willing to contribute/pay for their wedding?Good God, I have four daughters. We'll be broke!

Any other thoughts, issues, questions, etc. on weddings/commitment ceremonies are welcome and appreciated!

I mentioned this in an earlier thread, but I think that people would do well to remember that after the wedding, they're going to be married. The day-to-day reality of marriage is NOTHING like the fairytale of the wedding day.

Don't listen to anything I've said in this thread--I'm much more cynical now than I was when I was 20.

 

[EJFan]

weddings are generally for the bride's family. the groom needs to do two things... shut up and show up.

since women aren't typically "handed down" from father to husband any more (they have jobs, careers, education, self sufficiency) they tend to get married later in life and on their own terms. getting married at 35 instead of 18 can certainly lead to a more expensive wedding.

i think that commitment ceremonies are a nice idea... it's just a shame that we can't have civil unions for same-sex couples in the US. how victorian are we going to stay and for how long?

 

[Nightbird]

Why is Summer considered "The Season" for Weddings? Personally I would much rather get married in Winter or Fall when it's much cooler out.

 

[SweetErika]

I'll answer all of your questions, except for the one addressed to men, but only because I don't want to blow my cover.

The perception that "the wedding day is the most important day in a woman's life."

What do you think?*cough*Bullshit*cough*

Is/was that true for you? If not, what would you consider to be the most important day in your life?Both times I was married, I was very happy. At the time of my first marriage, I certainly didn't anticipate that it would end in divorce.

I was happier when my kids were born; we chose to have them because of our of our love/commitment to each other.

Did you always dream of the perfect wedding?I did for a bit before my first marriage, but it quickly became obvious to me that I wouldn't be having a huge wedding. My father was opposed to it--but he would have been opposed no matter who my husband was going to be. I'm more okay with that now than I was when I was 20.

The average cost of a wedding is now around $26,000, and that's up 73% over the last 15 years according to this survey.

Is this a fair amount to spend on the occasion?Seems a lot to me. I'd rather have the $26,000 to help with housing.

Was your wedding expensive, or fairly inexpensive?Wedding #1 was more expensive than wedding #2. Both were pretty inexpensive.

If you're married and had to do it all over again, what do you feel would be a reasonable amount to spend?I'd do what I did the second time around--it was just the two of us, a minister, and his wife.

For those who have children, how much would you be willing to contribute/pay for their wedding?Good God, I have four daughters. We'll be broke!

I mentioned this in an earlier thread, but I think that people would do well to remember that after the wedding, they're going to be married. The day-to-day reality of marriage is NOTHING like the fairytale of the wedding day.

Don't listen to anything I've said in this thread--I'm much more cynical now than I was when I was 20.

I don't know, Eilan...at 24, my views are fairly similar. Hopefully I've my cynicism has leveled out though!

I'm glad you restated the part about the reality of married life. For us, there was really no difference because we had been living together and had comingled everything for a couple of years before the wedding, but I know that's not the case for many.

 

[SweetErika]

weddings are generally for the bride's family. the groom needs to do two things... shut up and show up.

since women aren't typically "handed down" from father to husband any more (they have jobs, careers, education, self sufficiency) they tend to get married later in life and on their own terms. getting married at 35 instead of 18 can certainly lead to a more expensive wedding.

i think that commitment ceremonies are a nice idea... it's just a shame that we can't have civil unions for same-sex couples in the US. how victorian are we going to stay and for how long?

I can see how having more financial resources could lead to a more expensive wedding, yet I'd almost think people have a tendency to let go of the fairytale and be more concerned about finances as they grow older. But maybe they think they've waited so long and have to impress and outdo others?

Complete agreement here on the civil unions and commitment ceremonies, EJ. I've never been to a ceremony for a same-sex couple, but I'd imagine many of them are more about love and the couple than pomp and circumstance.

Why is Summer considered "The Season" for Weddings? Personally I would much rather get married in Winter or Fall when it's much cooler out.

Granted, a lot depends on where you are geographically, but here in the NW and many other areas, late spring-early fall is Wedding Season for a few reasons. First, it's usually nice weather (dark skies, rain and cold don't usually remind people of happiness and sometimes aren't conducive to travel). A lot of people also get time off in the summer. Flowers used to be more readily available, and I think historically in some cultures, spring-early fall was thought to be a time of rebirth, fertility, and good fortune.

 

[EJFan]

I can see how having more financial resources could lead to a more expensive wedding, yet I'd almost think people have a tendency to let go of the fairytale and be more concerned about finances as they grow older. But maybe they think they've waited so long and have to impress and outdo others?

i think the wedding cost rises when coulpes get married later in life because they're not restricted by the parents' wishes/finances. USUALLY when a couple gets married younger the bride's parents are footing most or all of the bill. if you pay for it all yourself, you tend to satisfy your own vision and worry about the financial end later... most "kids" are making more than their parents and have more earning years ahead of them.

something to be said about the fairytale thing though. good point. i guess it all boils down to where the intersection of wealth and practicality is for each couple.

 

[Seduce]

• The perception that "the wedding day is the most important day in a woman's life."
  -What do you think?
  -Is/was that true for you? If not, what would you consider to be the most important day in your life?
  -Did you always dream of the perfect wedding?
  -Men: Is the wedding that important to you, or not really a big deal?
  
  
• The average cost of a wedding is now around $26,000, and that's up 73% over the last 15 years according to this survey.
  -Is this a fair amount to spend on the occasion?
  -Was your wedding expensive, or fairly inexpensive? (I know these are subjective terms, so maybe you could give us a general ballpark or range if you're comfortable)
  -If you're married and had to do it all over again, what do you feel would be a reasonable amount to spend?
  -For those who have children, how much would you be willing to contribute/pay for their wedding?
  
  
• Any other thoughts, issues, questions, etc. on weddings/commitment ceremonies are welcome and appreciated!

• -The most important day/s in my life were when my daughters were born (and when I graduated at last )
  -I never dreamed of perfect wedding. (In fact the whole idea of marriage was repulsive to me...... till I married the first time at age of 20)
  
  
• -My opinion is that spending any amount of money on wedding is waste.
  -My first wedding costed very little (dinner for 10 and wedding cake as a present from my in-laws)
  -My second wedding costed even less - beer in snack bar for 5.
  -I got married twice and have no intention to marry again..... not a slightest chance.
  -When my children marry one day (hopefully not so soon) I will contribute as much as I can, or as much as they ask me to. My own ideas of wedding or money spending have nothing to do with my kids - if they want to have big wedding and spend fortune on it I will help as much as I can.

Btw, the only thing I do regret about my weddings is one of those frivole Barbie-like dresses........ one is human after all

 

[bisexplicit]

I have to admit that a fancy wedding does seem appealing to me. Plus, I absolutely adore to plan things; therefore, the more complex, the better. However, despite the fact that my parents will probably pay for my wedding, I like the idea of having it some of it done by myself/friends/family...I think its kindof more special that way.
$26,000 seems like a lot, but my sister is a bridesmaid (her friend is getting married this thursday, actually) and their wedding is costing about $20,000.
Anyway, the only really important thing to me about the wedding (aside from the whole, actually becoming married thing, hehe ) is the dress. One day to just feel absolutely beautiful.

 

[SweetErika]

i think the wedding cost rises when coulpes get married later in life because they're not restricted by the parents' wishes/finances. USUALLY when a couple gets married younger the bride's parents are footing most or all of the bill. if you pay for it all yourself, you tend to satisfy your own vision and worry about the financial end later... most "kids" are making more than their parents and have more earning years ahead of them.

something to be said about the fairytale thing though. good point. i guess it all boils down to where the intersection of wealth and practicality is for each couple.

Yep, I understand the reason; it's just the reasoning I have trouble with. But I'm very conservative financially and have never been able to see how spending so much on a day could possibly enrich my life.

• -The most important day/s in my life were when my daughters were born (and when I graduated at last )
  -I never dreamed of perfect wedding. (In fact the whole idea of marriage was repulsive to me...... till I married the first time at age of 20)
  
  
• -My opinion is that spending any amount of money on wedding is waste.
  -My first wedding costed very little (dinner for 10 and wedding cake as a present from my in-laws)
  -My second wedding costed even less - beer in snack bar for 5.
  -I got married twice and have no intention to marry again..... not a slightest chance.
  -When my children marry one day (hopefully not so soon) I will contribute as much as I can, or as much as they ask me to. My own ideas of wedding or money spending have nothing to do with my kids - if they want to have big wedding and spend fortune on it I will help as much as I can.

Btw, the only thing I do regret about my weddings is one of those frivole Barbie-like dresses........ one is human after all

Thanks for the input, Seduce. It's interesting to hear other experiences and ideas on the topic! May I ask where you were the second time (the snack bar is intriguing)?

I have to admit that a fancy wedding does seem appealing to me. Plus, I absolutely adore to plan things; therefore, the more complex, the better. However, despite the fact that my parents will probably pay for my wedding, I like the idea of having it some of it done by myself/friends/family...I think its kindof more special that way.
$26,000 seems like a lot, but my sister is a bridesmaid (her friend is getting married this thursday, actually) and their wedding is costing about $20,000.
Anyway, the only really important thing to me about the wedding (aside from the whole, actually becoming married thing, hehe ) is the dress. One day to just feel absolutely beautiful.

I'm glad you responded, Bi. Do you know why a big or fancy wedding is appealing? Is it an image or dream you've had for a long time?

 

[Seduce]

Thanks for the input, Seduce. It's interesting to hear other experiences and ideas on the topic! May I ask where you were the second time (the snack bar is intriguing)?

Yw
Well, my second wedding was in Bonn (Germany) in Croatian embassy.

It was Wednesday and we had to drive for about 2 hours from home, then pick up my friend who came by train (she started celebrating on her own in dining car and had couple of beers too much so we almost missed her)...... then we had to wait for my husbands best men and his wife, while waiting I had a couple of beers myself....... when the best man finally came we were almost an hour late and me and my friend were giggling all the time.

People in embassy were really pissed off and I couldnt stop giggling...... hardly stammered "I do"....... and then we went to the nearest snack bar cos we all had to go back home and there was not much time left.
And we had couple of more beers (except my husband who had to drive).

In fact, I was scared to death....... after being married for almost 17 yrs and having really nasty divorce, I didnt want to marry again.
Although we lived together for a year, I had some funny ideas about burying myself and getting chains on my leg and things like that.

Hopefully I loved him enough to get over my silly fears

 

[bisexplicit]

I have to say that I've been sucked into the big fancy wedding dream...Its sortof like getting to be a princess for a day, with a handsome prince. And I've always loved fairy tales.
I realize that its not something that ever turns out "perfect," but I see nothing wrong with making a big deal about it.

 

[SweetErika]

Yw
Well, my second wedding was in Bonn (Germany) in Croatian embassy.
...

Good story!

I have to say that I've been sucked into the big fancy wedding dream...Its sortof like getting to be a princess for a day, with a handsome prince. And I've always loved fairy tales.
I realize that its not something that ever turns out "perfect," but I see nothing wrong with making a big deal about it.

No, there certainly isn't anything wrong with making a big deal of it. It IS a big deal, and a time for celebration. As long as it's about the couple and what they want, I say go for it.

 

[SweetErika]

The perception that "the wedding day is the most important day in a woman's life."
-What do you think?
-Is/was that true for you? If not, what would you consider to be the most important day in your life?
-Did you always dream of the perfect wedding?
-Men: Is the wedding that important to you, or not really a big deal?

For me, it was an important day, maybe even the most significant positive one in my life so far. I have no doubt there will be many more important ones in the future though.

I probably dreamed about a storybook wedding when I was little, but for a long time, I didn't want to get married. I always thought it'd just be better to be in a long-term, commited, domestic relationship. So, other than the wedding suiting our general style (elegant, but a little unconventional), and being all about us instead of things, I didn't have a picture in mind.

The average cost of a wedding is now around $26,000, and that's up 73% over the last 15 years according to this survey.
-Is this a fair amount to spend on the occasion?
-Was your wedding expensive, or fairly inexpensive? (I know these are subjective terms, so maybe you could give us a general ballpark or range if you're comfortable)
-If you're married and had to do it all over again, what do you feel would be a reasonable amount to spend?
-For those who have children, how much would you be willing to contribute/pay for their wedding?

Even if $26,000 was a drop in the bucket, I wouldn't dream of spending that kind of money. As it turned out, our parents paid for everything (his paid less for the wedding, but ended up giving us the balance of what mine did), but I can't imagine asking them to spend much more than they did, even though they have the money.

Ours was very small, elegant, and about $5000 all-inclusive, I think. I rented a simple dress, not because of the money, but because it wasn't important to me. The photographer and rings were, and we spent more on them. It was perfect for us, and I wouldn't change a thing, although it might have been fun to have a destination wedding with a few family members and friends.

The most important thing was the ceremony. We compiled/wrote it ourselves because we wanted it to be about our individual relationship. This thread prompted me to take a look at my vows, and it was interesting to see how well they fit today, even though we've changed a lot since saying them.

 

[Eilan]

I never really thought about how much things cost for my first wedding--probably under $2,000. Even though we were in college at the time, my ex and I paid for most of it ourselves. My mom and grandparents helped out as well. My former in-laws did the rehearsal dinner--my ex father-in-law is an amazing cook! They also paid for some of the reception--though I found out years later that my ex mother-in-law had all the bills sent to my grandparents, even though SHE'D volunteered to cover these costs (my family kept all this from me to keep down trouble). If I'd known she was going to do that, I would have paid for everything myself, because until she offered, I was prepared to do so.

My husband and I had both been married before, and since we'd both had the frilly white church weddings, we saw no need to do that again. I bought a nice gray suit, and he already had a suit of his own. We went to a wedding chapel in a neighboring state, then had a really nice dinner and spent the rest of the time in our hotel room! The rings were by far the biggest expense.

For what it's worth, I think every bride, virgin or not, deserves to wear white on her wedding day, unless she prefers not to.

 

[BTK51]

Can't Speak For Women But ...

Now that we're firmly in the season, I've been thinking about weddings/commitment ceremonies and am curious to hear thoughts from others. A few things I've been wondering about, though answering all of these is certainly not necessary:

• The perception that "the wedding day is the most important day in a woman's life."
  -What do you think? --- My wife says that the birth of her children was more important. Personally, I see them all as equally the most important day.
  
  -Is/was that true for you? If not, what would you consider to be the most important day in your life? --- The wedding day wasn't that big of a deal to me, the ceremony was.
  
  -Did you always dream of the perfect wedding? --- No, never thought about it. My wife did think about the day but was never obsessed with it being be-all-and-end-all.
  
  -Men: Is the wedding that important to you, or not really a big deal? --- I’m assuming that you are talking about the reception and that was never a big thing to me. We briefly considered eloping, but that would have hurt a lot of members in both our families. I didn’t care at all what the party afterwards was. My Mother-in-law was a real pain-in-the-ass so we just told her to leave the ceremony alone & tell us where to show up and at what time.
  
  The average cost of a wedding is now around $26,000, and that's up 73% over the last 15 years according to this survey.
  -Is this a fair amount to spend on the occasion? --- I have a son getting married next month and I think that it’s a ridiculous amount to be spending on one day. Having said that, their wedding will even be a little more expensive. But I’ve been to plenty of weddings that were a lot more.
  
  -Was your wedding expensive, or fairly inexpensive? (I know these are subjective terms, so maybe you could give us a general ballpark or range if you're comfortable) --- I got married in 1972, and my in-laws paid for the reception. I don’t know what it cost but it wasn’t fancy at all. There were set-ups on the table instead of open bar. I had about 275 people there (50 from my side of the family and about 30-40 friends).
  
  -If you're married and had to do it all over again, what do you feel would be a reasonable amount to spend? --- I don’t see the dollar amount as being important. It depends on what you can truly afford. It should be meaningful to the couple, and not handicap the person paying. This amount could vary greatly.
  
  -For those who have children, how much would you be willing to contribute/pay for their wedding? --- We allocated $15,000 as a gift for him to start his life with his new bride. There were other things that my wife likes to get them on top of that and oter expenses (like golf the day before, hotel rooms, etc.). They chose a big wedding, so although her parents are paying for the reception, some of the money is going towards expenses like a big Rehearsal Dinner. That’s their choice, and I’m fine with it. I did the same for my first son’s wedding.
  
  
• Any other thoughts, issues, questions, etc. on weddings/commitment ceremonies are welcome and appreciated!

It seems to me like a lot of money to spend on one day. I think that it’s nice to have a big wedding and big celebration, but IMHO too many times the emphasis is put on the wrong thing. It’s the people and the atmosphere that make it fun. I’ve been to really nice places with great food where I had to load up on coffee to stop from falling asleep. I’ve seen exorbitant amounts spent on weddings and they end up splitting up shortly afterwards. I’ve been to small, intimate affairs that were fun and not that costly. I’m going to one of those “Destination Weddings” this summer in the Caribbean that’s costing me $2,000 to attend (6 days).

I consider myself a romantic at heart, but my opinion is that weddings have been too commercialized and scripted. I think the most important thing is that it is meaningful and memorable to the couple and secondly, to the close friends and family.

 

[silverwhisper]

erika queried
the perception that "the wedding day is the most important day in a woman's life."

i think that's often true, but becomes less so as the woman gets older (e.g., birth of children, etc.). it was close to true for me, as the groom. when i was a kid, i sort of daydreamed about the perfect wedding, but never in any concrete terms. although i always knew that i would wed a caucasian woman, rather than an asian one. :> the wedding was most definitely important to me, both emotionally and financially.

erika queried
the average cost of a wedding is now around $26,000, and that's up 73% over the last 15 years according to this survey.

i think the question of whether it is a reasonable amount is up to whoever is footing the bill. :> for some, anything more than the paperwork for the justice of the peace is the limit; others prefer a "spare no expense" approach. but for something that can be as significant to some as it can be, i don't feel right criticizing their choices. mine was fairly expensive but still below the median cited. i would do it all the same again, but not pick the same damned weekend as mother's day. and maybe hire a videographer who caught the incredible cherries jubilee show on tape. :>

ed

 

[borisk]

• The perception that "the wedding day is the most important day in a woman's life."
  -What do you think?
  -Is/was that true for you? If not, what would you consider to be the most important day in your life?
  -Did you always dream of the perfect wedding?
  -Men: Is the wedding that important to you, or not really a big deal?

- I dont think this is true for the couple, I mean you are already commited to one another.
- Wedding wasnt really important to me, really its just a play for the friends and family. Most important day in my life is when we decided to have kids together.
- I never really dreamed of a wedding, I think thats imposed on women more than men
- Like i say, it wasnt important for me but more for the family.

[*]The average cost of a wedding is now around $26,000, and that's up 73% over the last 15 years according to this survey.
-Is this a fair amount to spend on the occasion?
-Was your wedding expensive, or fairly inexpensive? (I know these are subjective terms, so maybe you could give us a general ballpark or range if you're comfortable)
-If you're married and had to do it all over again, what do you feel would be a reasonable amount to spend?
-For those who have children, how much would you be willing to contribute/pay for their wedding?[/list]

- We had a very nice wedding for < $10,000 including the honeymoon.
-Personaly I would spend the $100 court fees, and go for a cruise around the world.
- My kids.... I'll give them the world!

[*]Any other thoughts, issues, questions, etc. on weddings/commitment ceremonies are welcome and appreciated!
[/list]

in reallity my wedding was nice but WE didnt get to enjoy it because of all the other activities going on. Photographer, dance , talking to EVERYONE. Hell, After the church service, we didnt see each other at the reception untill it was time to cut cake and dance.... Didnt even get to taist the food.

But this is a mans point of view,
Boris

 

[Willing and Unsure]

The perception that "the wedding day is the most important day in a woman's life."
-What do you think?
-Is/was that true for you? If not, what would you consider to be the most important day in your life?
-Did you always dream of the perfect wedding?
-Men: Is the wedding that important to you, or not really a big deal?


I dont see it as being the most important day in my life. I'm not married either right now, but I think that it's an important day, but not the most important day. To be honest, I'd say the day of my birth is truly the most important day, based solely on the fact that I wouldnt be in existence to even answer this question if it weren't for that day. I have never really dreamed of the perfect wedding. But then again, I think I'm just weird like that sometimes.


The average cost of a wedding is now around $26,000, and that's up 73% over the last 15 years according to this survey.
-Is this a fair amount to spend on the occasion?
-Was your wedding expensive, or fairly inexpensive? (I know these are subjective terms, so maybe you could give us a general ballpark or range if you're comfortable)
-If you're married and had to do it all over again, what do you feel would be a reasonable amount to spend?
-For those who have children, how much would you be willing to contribute/pay for their wedding?


I find that amount to be ridiculous for a wedding. Then again, I am probably going to be happiest with going to the courthouse and getting married when it does happen. I hate the idea of having to sit down and plan things based on what other people might want (that's my mom's theory on planning a wedding).


Any other thoughts, issues, questions, etc. on weddings/commitment ceremonies are welcome and appreciated!


about a year and a half ago I was engaged to someone and slowly planning a wedding. It wasnt very much fun. Since then, the engagement fell through, and I've decided that if/when I do get married, it will be in a comfy little sundress at the courthouse. I hate being told by other people what I'm supposed to do or not do for occasions, and I hate being the center of attention like that. To me, there's really only one person's attention that I will need on that day, the man I'm marrying. I also dislike going to weddings for other people. I find that they are often overdone and never go as the couple would have wanted them to.

 

[Lynxie]

I did the big wedding thing, just this past October 17th. While I do wish it weren't so expensive, I can't say I have any regrets.

When all was said and done, we spent about $15,000 on the wedding an honeymoon. Our ceremony was held at a Unitarian Universalist church, and performed by a UU minister, though the affair itself was non-denominational. Only minor elements of religion were brought into it, yet the hubby and I still felt it was important to have it in a place of religion (he's Christian, I'm eclectic pagan). The reception was held at an historic inn, and about 75 people attended. It wasn't a huge wedding, but it was certainly expensive enough to have all our closest friends and family members attend. We honeymooned here for 11 days, and it was absolutely amazing.

Here's the killer... we actually got married on March 1st by a justice of the peace at the local courthouse. It had to be done for health insurance reasons. It cost less than $150, including the JP fee and blood tests. However, we opted not to tell anyone beyond our immediate families and have the October 'wedding' as planned.

Sure, it was a frivolous luxury... but my husband and I decided it was a luxury we really wanted. We wanted to dress up and make a big deal out of it, we wanted to throw a great reception for our friends and family, and we wanted to treat ourselves to a fabulous Mexican honeymoon. We didn't do it because our parents or society demanded it, we did it because it was something we thought would be fun... and it really was the best time of our lives thus far. But do I feel that my wedding was the most important day of my life? Not at all. It was important, sure, but I can't say it was more important than the day I was born, or the day I fell in love, or the day I'll die.

edited to add: I found out yesterday that our wedding album was sent out over a month ago...it has apparently been lost in the mail... joy.

 

[Meat Whistler]

***

My wedding day won't be the most important day of my life, though it will be special. I don't like the thoughts of a highly fancy wedding, in fact, I refuse to spend even close to $20,000 on a wedding. It's a wedding. I'd rather use that $20,000 for a downpayment on a home or invest it in other areas. Regardless of money, I'd rather have 50 guests at my wedding than 300+, mainly because I feel it is an intimate affair and I want it to stay that way.

I was never the type to dream about my wedding day, though seeing one of my siblings walk down the aisle did bring tears to my eyes.