Ways to vanquish a 'feel-good' mood in the blink of an eye. Volume I

[modest mouse]

1. Receive a kiss off/ fuck you PM from a friend and they leave messenger as soon as you open the message.

A short fuck you would have been awful enough, this is much more in depth and it sucks.

 

[seXieleXie]

did you earn the fuck you?

 

[Laurel]

2. Notice there's a dead fly on the slice of pizza you're eating.

3. Getting checked out at the mall and think you're hot shit...then realizing that they're staring at the back of your skirt, which is tucked into your tights.

4. Have a 'friend' loogee in your Slurpee straw. (Don't make me tell that story!)

 

[navarre]

4. Have a 'friend' loogee in your Slurpee straw. (Don't make me tell that story!)

That's awfully gross Laurel but please tell the story anyway.

 

[alexandraaah]

Laurel, how did I know that you'd be able to answer this question without reaching into the depths?

 

[seXieleXie]

5. getting a random nosebleed.

6. having your roommate vomit on the floor next to your bed.

7. break a nail.

 

[Starfish]

I get the distinct impression that this was not meant to be a list thread.

 

[Laurel]

Laurel, how did I know that you'd be able to answer this question without reaching into the depths?

Because you're Draaah, and I'm Laurel.

I was in 10th grade. I'd ditched 4-6 periods (I ditched a LOT that year), and was walking back from 7-11 with a group of other ditchers. One of them - a weaselly little dude - asked if he could have a sip of my Slurpee.

Being the kind & naive (aka dumb) young person that I was, I let him have it. He seemed to take a long time with it, but I was talking to someone else and didn't think about it much. He handed it back to me, said, "Thanks! That was delicious!" and skated off down one of the cross roads.

I take a big sip and...yes, you guessed it - he'd loogeed into the straw.

I had Cherry Slurpee mixed with someone else's mucus in my mouth before I realized what had happened. It was a truly horrific moment in my life. I remember it vividly.

 

[riff]

At the wedding reception, instead of writing something in shaving cream... just take a shit on the hood of the car. LOL

 

[lavender]

 

[Guest]

 

[Laurel]

If there's one thing one this good earth absolutely guaranteed to make me retch and heave, it's mucous/pleghm/booger stories.

Yuck, double yuck, triple yuck.

Tell me about it! I can handle blood, but even looking at someone else's mucus brings on the dry heaves.

 

[pabloback]

still not sure what a loogie is?

 

[navarre]

Because you're Draaah, and I'm Laurel.

I was in 10th grade. I'd ditched 4-6 periods (I ditched a LOT that year), and was walking back from 7-11 with a group of other ditchers. One of them - a weaselly little dude - asked if he could have a sip of my Slurpee.

Being the kind & naive (aka dumb) young person that I was, I let him have it. He seemed to take a long time with it, but I was talking to someone else and didn't think about it much. He handed it back to me, said, "Thanks! That was delicious!" and skated off down one of the cross roads.

I take a big sip and...yes, you guessed it - he'd loogeed into the straw.

I had Cherry Slurpee mixed with someone else's mucus in my mouth before I realized what had happened. It was a truly horrific moment in my life. I remember it vividly.

ROFLAPMP

 

[Rambling Rose]

A short fuck you would have been awful enough, this is much more in depth and it sucks.

fuck you.

(I usually leave the short stuff for Marxist but this time I'll step up to the plate)

 

[Guest]

 

[Laurel]

*loogie, loughie* /loogee/ n : phlegm syn. gilbo, lung cookie, lung butter

 

[riff]

throat oysters

 

[Rubyfruit]

I think Laurel's loogie story just ruined my feel-ok mood.

 

[Mischka]

Hi Ruby.

 

[seXieleXie]

I think Laurel's loogie story just ruined my feel-ok mood.

i love you ruby.

 

[Laurel]

Sorry, Ruby! I just feel compelled to make people aware that this sort of thing can happen so that they can avoid it in the future.

Moral of the story: Don't Share Slurpees with Teenage Boys.

 

[Rubyfruit]

Mischka, Lexie - hello.

That's ok Laurel, I didn't want to eat dinner tonight anyway.

 

[riff]

I think Laurel's loogie story just ruined my feel-ok mood.

Better homes, safety-sealed communities
Did you remember to pay the utilities
Cop on the corner says you better not cross
Or am I the one that's really dangerous
Sanitation expiration take pushin everything
or shut up and be a victim of authority

Warning, Live without warning....

You like green day, ruby?

 

[Laurel]

I love that song.

Well, I'm taking a nap, after which I'll be posting elsewhere on the GB. Ruby, the board will be free of Laurel's stories for a good hour or so. Enjoy it while it lasts!