Trad Wives

[shewantsmore]

A friend is researching the influence of Trad (Traditional) wives in social media; women who are trying to revive the "traditional" role of women in marriage. They keep spotless houses, always have dinner on the table when their husbands come home and always look their best. They're never caught without makeup or in sloppy clothes.

I've wondered what their lives are really like. What are their fantasies? What do they think about alone in the shower or after their husbands are asleep?

For instance, does Laura think about the sweaty baseball player in tight pants? Does she masturbate to images of the Black actor and wonder what it would be like to feel his cock insider her?

https://64.media.tumblr.com/08575ab8e14508e5800a2d58faa7c05a/fe0a76a870cc0a20-b3/s1280x1920/8dfb6af8b14523ea4dd837150f02ab226e243500.jpg

looks like something from the 50s early 60s or the stepford wives movie, all smiles but behind the scenes anything but smiles

 

[BabyBoomer50s]

Fun fact:

The device that you’re using to have this conversation and watch porn has a feature that would allow you to look up trad wife culture and learn what it is before you opine on it.

Wikipedia:

“A tradwife (a neologism for traditional wife or traditional housewife) is a woman who believes in and practices traditional gender roles and marriages. Some may choose to take a homemaking role within their marriage, and others leave their careers to focus on meeting their family's needs in the home.“

Nothing ominous here. A mainstream and laudable way of life for millions of families.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tradwife

 

[BabyBoomer50s]

Seems you haven't spent much time in the BDSM personals. There are men there that want to exercise control over every little part of their partner's lives. Not in a mutual fun D/s play arrangement, but in an exploitative and creepy way that's entirely for their own benefit.

Sure. That’s BDSM. This isn’t a BDSM thread. This thread is about traditional wives.

 

[drusus]

Sure. That’s BDSM. This isn’t a BDSM thread. This thread is about traditional wives.

You talked about about men on the whole site. The control they're after goes far beyond financial and it has nothing to do with BDSM, even though it's often posted there.

 

[BabyBoomer50s]

You talked about about men on the whole site. The control they're after goes far beyond financial and it has nothing to do with BDSM, even though it's often posted there.

I’m just commenting about trad wives on a thread about trad wives. I’m sure there are men into BDSM but that has nothing to do with the traditional role of women in marriage. “Trad wife” is simply shorthand for traditional wife.

 

[HampshireBoy]

Married women who stay home to run the household, cook the meals, take care of the children, and love their husbands are to be cherished.

True, as long as both are equal in the marriage and are happy in their roles.

My first wife and I made a joint decision that it was better for her to be a stay at home mum for the kids early years, the trouble is she grew to resent it as she got older so at that point she returned to work. I should add that we had a joint account for bills, clothes, etc and I put money in her account each month which was hers to spend as she wished.

 

[LMWM321]

(I realize this thread was started mostly to stoke a sexual kink, but I could resist giving a more serious reply.)

The problem w/ being a Trad wife is should the wife want (or need!) to work after the kids are grown and gone - or if her marriage fails - she'll find that prospective employers don't really value her years raising kids and supporting a husband as relevant "Prior Work Experience." This means she'll not only have to contend with age discrimination but she'll have to be content with starting at the very bottom of pretty much any career path. And if she doesn't have a college degree, she may well be looking at an hourly wage job in the service industry.

While I would never judge any woman for choosing to be a Trad wife, I would strongly discourage my daughters or nieces from going that direction. Why? Because I wouldn't want them to EVER be financial captives to a husband - even a good husband. Nope, I'd want for them to have their own careers and to marry a guy who shares in running the house and raising the kids, etc.. Even then, a decision may be needed as to who's career is the primary career (dictates family moves, etc..) and maybe it's best to let it be his, that's fine. ...But I'd want them to have careers of their own nontheless - even if it's not the top-priority career in the home (not that it shouldn't be!).

Besides, these days, it's VERY hard for a family to get by on just one income. Back in the 60's my dad, as a mid-level accountant for a mfg. company, was able to pay his college loans, buy a home, a car, and raise 5 kids. On ONE mid-level salary!!! Today, such a job pays pays about $75,000/ yr. ...There's no chance of doing that much on so little today. None.

 

[Sweetdreams71]

In order to have a fair convo about this one would need to "define Trad wife"
And my belief is whatever life you chose or chosen for you, happiness, sadness, manipulation, rape, financial abuse, physical mental abuse etc can be relevant in all relationships regardless of "definition".

Don't judge a Trad wife because one does not know the entire situation. I know of a few Trad wives whom the husband worshipped the ground his wife walked on and all decisions were made together. Very happy.
But if the trad wife is unhappy at least it is easier to escape these confines vs 100 years ago and not be socially outcast.

 

[RightField]

Not everything is always as it appears. There's an east-coast town that the "Stepford Wives" was fictionally based in. It was the same town where Martha Stewart, in her youth, was famous for hosting "key parties".

 

[UtilityCurve]

Mmmmmm, key parties. A much better invention of the era than Jell-O molds.

 

[Kittenheels54]

This is my experience….
I’m a military spouse. My husband served 24 years in the Air Force & now works overseas for Lockheed Martin. He is gone 4 months at a time. During his active duty days we moved several times. There are huge gaps in my working history. Some I couldn’t work where we lived other times we couldn’t afford daycare for 2 children so I stayed home. While I wasn’t a trad wife, I’m sorta facing the same things financially etc. if we ever were to divorce. I’m now 54 & have a limited set of skills/education. Yes I would get half of everything plus have free healthcare but I still would struggle to support myself. I’m encouraging my daughter to have a career of her own & be able to support herself.

 

[LMWM321]

While I wasn’t a trad wife, I’m sorta facing the same things financially etc. if we ever were to divorce. I’m now 54 & have a limited set of skills/education.

I'm sure that's a scary thought - even if you adore your husband and don't foresee ever leaving him. I hope you and your husband have several happy and healthy decades ahead so your concerns never come to fruition.

Today, no-fault divorce (under threat by the Project 2025 gang) may assure equal division of assets - which it should - but it does nothing to assure the stay-at-home-parent (usually the wife) is left with an equally marketable skill set to rely on if the marriage ends by divorce or death. This can be significant issue because alimony or Life Insurance don't last forever. So women entering into a Trad Wife marriage should first talk with someone like you to maybe better understand the bargain they're making. As I said, I wouldn't want it for my daughters.

 

[Yarglenurp]

I'm sure that's a scary thought - even if you adore your husband and don't foresee ever leaving him. I hope you and your husband have several happy and healthy decades ahead so your concerns never come to fruition.

Today, no-fault divorce (under threat by the Project 2025 gang) may assure equal division of assets - which it should - but it does nothing to assure the stay-at-home-parent (usually the wife) is left with an equally marketable skill set to rely on if the marriage ends by divorce or death. This can be significant issue because alimony or Life Insurance don't last forever. So women entering into a Trad Wife marriage should first talk with someone like you to maybe better understand the bargain they're making. As I said, I wouldn't want it for my daughters.

to be fair, assuming the man is around the same age, if he were to lose his job, I doubt he’d find employment that easy either.

 

[LMWM321]

to be fair, assuming the man is around the same age, if he were to lose his job, I doubt he’d find employment that easy either.

Couldn't disagree more...

Setting aside the gender issue, a 54 years old person with w/ a 30+ work history will find it MUCH MUCH easier to find a job than a 54 year old person with none! The former may have to content themself with a pay cut and backward step career wise, but finding work will be MUCH easier. The best the person with no work history might expect is an all-commission sales job or an hourly retail job. Yikes... I agree with a lot of what you say Yarglenurp, but not on this. Sorry.

 

[Yarglenurp]

Couldn't disagree more...

Setting aside the gender issue, a 54 years old person with w/ a 30+ work history will find it MUCH MUCH easier to find a job than a 54 year old person none! The former may have to content themself with a pay cut and backward step career wise, but finding work will be MUCH easier! The best the person with no work history might expect is an all-commission sales job or an hourly retail job. Yikes... I agree with a lot of what you say Yarglenurp, but not on this. Sorry.

… I didn’t compare it to the woman, I was saying the guy won’t have an easy time either.

I’m saying that a general, average employee in their 50s who’s been laid off isn’t going to have an easy time finding a job. It’s not even a step down, a lot of employers just won’t hire you because there’d be a general sense that you’d be too old to learn new tricks. As for retail, food… pretty sure most managers are looking for healthy, naive bodies they can work to death, not old guys.

Ideally, the dude has connections and some special skill so he can sell himself. If he doesn’t, it’s going to be a rough time.

 

[Xxxmmmxxx47]

So i am almost a trad wife. I dress like that. Have dinner on the table, keep a nice house…But i have a bomb ass job.
In regards to sex and my fantasy…
For my husband- free use- any time anywhere any way.
Fantasy. I love ownership and breeding

 

[Yarglenurp]

So i am almost a trad wife. I dress like that. Have dinner on the table, keep a nice house…But i have a bomb ass job.
In regards to sex and my fantasy…
For my husband- free use- any time anywhere any way.
Fantasy. I love ownership and breeding

it’s a fine fetish to play into. Though, by definition, you are not a trad wife in the most important sense, since you have a job and your financial survival is not almost completely dependent on your husband.

I’d say it’d be the same difference between a black guy roleplaying being a house slave as his kink vs actually being enslaved such that he has no rights or legal claims to personhood.

 

[Xxxmmmxxx47]

Thats not valid. I do all of the trad wife responsibilities, even though i go to work, cooking, cleaning, everything. I actually dont pay the bills, he does, i use my money to help my mom who is on a fixed income. My kink is not trad wife- thats my general philosophy, as i get ready to pull my apron on this morning and make scratch made biscuits and homemade jam…

my kinks are free use, ownership and breeding….i know because making jam and cleaning the house doesnt get me wet… its the sensation i feel while cleaning the house…of the cum running down my leg from being taken against the breakfast table before he left for work because he needed release… that is what gets me going…

 

[Yarglenurp]

lol, ok, so this quickly becomes an argument about particulars, which is silly because no one knows you except you.

Point is, it’s fine to willingly do, especially if you have a full-time job, but probably not fine to encourage because it makes a lot of people susceptible to physical, emotional, or financial abuse. If you’re willingly choosing to do this while having a full time job, that’s fine, just like fishing is fine, playing video games is fine, or reading books is fine. If you’re compelled to do this because you have no ability to get a job and desperately wish you had your own source of income, it’s not fine.

 

[Thomas_Hardy]

My tuppence re. tradwife - it's become a fetish of sorts but way outside any BDSM perimeter unless one projects a particular reading of a wife as sexually, emotionally and economically exploited 'chattel of the man onto it. My favourite example is the growing number of tradwife YT channels where the family is actually largely sustained by the channel's income which often rests on the 21st century media savvy work of her while he rus a smallholding / lumberjack business etc in the background and figures mostly as a prop in the videos. The fetish is rooted in that strange state of the world where it has become subversive to perform traditional gender roles.

The traditional family unit of M+F+child(ren) is of course a late Victorian era lower middle class phenomenon (and its equivalents across Northatlantic societies), as the extended family fell away, nannies only affordable for the upper middle classes, and all in a picture book setting of relative suburbanised prosperity. Many working class couples required two incomes to make ends meet, often the wife taking on hourly cleaning etc jobs, the husband not having the luxury of uninterrupted permanent employment, and so on. In short, that rump family setting of the stay-at-home mom ony persisted for a few decades each in the 19th and 20th centuries, and we know it largely from the commercials of the mass poduct age that brought about the relative prosperity and luxury of those lower middle classes.

I guess my overall point is that if you look for 'tradwife' through D/s spectacles you'll find them on the benign side of that nasty exploitative edge present in every patriarchial society, anywhere, in all classes, and all times. But that romanticised and now retrogradely subversive and as such fetishised spectre of the tradwife, for that, you have to look in those few decades that defined our strawman and strawoman gender stereotypes.

 

[RoryN]

I had a story idea that I was mulling over with a trandwife.

So did someone else, apparently.

Tradwife account ‘Patriarchy Hannah’ apologizes for lies, says she was ‘not who I presented myself to be’​

The person behind a popular “tradwife” social media account apologized Monday for misleading followers into thinking the account owner was an ultraconservative married mother of 14.

“I just want to say that I am sorry for the lies I told and the hurt I caused. I never intended for this account to become as big as it did, and once things started snowballing, I enjoyed the relationships I’d built and didn’t know how to put an end to it,” the person behind the X account “Patriarchy Hannah” wrote.

Just who is “Patriarchy Hannah”? It’s still not entirely clear.

The social media fracas started last week, after internet sleuth Ryan Duff published a lengthy thread on X that dove into the account’s background, pointing out inconsistencies in claims the “Hannah” character made over the past four years. He said he combed through property records and obituaries, in addition to using reverse image searches, to prove that “Hannah” was not real. Duff did not immediately reply to a request for comment made via X.

His search led him to an Arkansas-based woman who does not appear to have 14 children. It is also unclear whether she is married. Images of a property shared by “Hannah,” which Duff traced on the real estate site Zillow, appear to be of a house in Louisiana.

NBC News has not confirmed the identity of the person behind the account and was not immediately able to contact the person. A request for comment sent to the “Patriarchy Hannah” account did not receive a response.

https://www.nbcnews.com/tech/intern...pologizes-lies-says-was-not-presen-rcna192664

 

[old_hippy_46]

A friend is researching the influence of Trad (Traditional) wives in social media; women who are trying to revive the "traditional" role of women in marriage. They keep spotless houses, always have dinner on the table when their husbands come home and always look their best. They're never caught without makeup or in sloppy clothes.

I've wondered what their lives are really like. What are their fantasies? What do they think about alone in the shower or after their husbands are asleep?

For instance, does Laura think about the sweaty baseball player in tight pants? Does she masturbate to images of the Black actor and wonder what it would be like to feel his cock insider her?

https://64.media.tumblr.com/08575ab8e14508e5800a2d58faa7c05a/fe0a76a870cc0a20-b3/s1280x1920/8dfb6af8b14523ea4dd837150f02ab226e243500.jpg

I had a friend who would say more good pussy is wasted in traditional married women

 

[loveupskirt]

I like the look. I checked out the page then moved on because, like so many other things, both here and everywhere, became political. It's a lifestyle choice they make. Not my concern. But for some of you, not everything is about oppression and rights. If someone is forcing them to do it, that's a different matter, but most likely they want to.

 

[grumpyoldperv]

I have a friend who would love to be a trad wife. She is no shrinking violet. She has been a single mom, married mom, and almost always had a job outside the home. She is college educated, loaded with common sense, can made hard decisions and stand by them. She is a very strong person who would do well on her own. But she yearns to be a stay at home wife and living as not equal, but second to her man. Circumstances have never allowed her to fill that roll.

 

[screwher]

I have an honest question.

The trad wife seems to be a throwback to women in the 50s. So would Sex (with her husband, at least) be once a week, Saturday night with the lights off?