"To keep the review thread clean..."

[butters]

Abject apologies
caught up in your thoughts
I failed to see you

:caning: self-flagelating to deaden the pain of mortified embarrassment

no need for self-abuse anyway, the av could have been anyone's eye and the name is not exactly gender-specific, is it?

behave, or I'll threaten to kiss it better

 

[lorencino]

no need for self-abuse anyway, the av could have been anyone's eye and the name is not exactly gender-specific, is it?

behave, or I'll threaten to kiss it better

Ah, but self-abuse is what made me who I am. (I learned about "self-abuse" in the Scout's Manual and it changed my life)

I'm definitely not intending to behave in the face of threats like that.

 

[UnderYourSpell]

*Googles Scout's Manual *

 

[butters]

*Googles Scout's Manual *

self-abuse as in wanking, m'dear. the warnings about the evils of it and idle hands lol.
Hello

ok, you know I enjoy your work and have said so before UYS, so maybe you can educate me about your piece I took a look at earlier? what is it I'm missing? what perspective?

 

[UnderYourSpell]

self-abuse as in wanking, m'dear. the warnings about the evils of it and idle hands lol.
Hello

ok, you know I enjoy your work and have said so before UYS, so maybe you can educate me about your piece I took a look at earlier? what is it I'm missing? what perspective?

I know what self abuse is I just wanted to know the scouts handle on it ( pun intended)!

As for the rest what can I say? I see it as free verse you see it as prose we all have our own ideas on what's what so who am I to quibble?! The next one going up will be a form poem for the challenge I expect and I hope you like it better

 

[butters]

I know what self abuse is I just wanted to know the scouts handle on it ( pun intended)!

As for the rest what can I say? I see it as free verse you see it as prose we all have our own ideas on what's what so who am I to quibble?! The next one going up will be a form poem for the challenge I expect and I hope you like it better

aha! did you find ouut? hahaha


okay - then we agree to disagree. that's cool. I'm sure I shall - looking forward to it. Give me a nudge when you post it, ok?

 

[UnderYourSpell]

aha! did you find ouut? hahaha


okay - then we agree to disagree. that's cool. I'm sure I shall - looking forward to it. Give me a nudge when you post it, ok?

As a matter of interest were all the other poems posted on that day great?

 

[butters]

As a matter of interest were all the other poems posted on that day great?

of those I read, none were what I'd call great. nor even remarkable, though the Buddha piece stood out for me above the others. It might have been the Kerouac link that did it for me, a true link in with his words and not a mere name-drop, and adding dimension to a small and otherwise on-the-face-of-it quite bland piece. I HATE it when people name-drop just for the sake of making their poem look more important than it is. Nor am I a fan of the 'fashions' that come and go, like the obligatory piece of fruit everyone started mentioning in their writing (not here, on other writing sites I was at) or a specific colour - the poems started to feel more a paint-by-number creation than a living, breathing work of art. Writing to a set menu, unless the writer's skills are advanced enough to transcend that, is (imo) always a mistake.

 

[UnderYourSpell]

of those I read, none were what I'd call great. nor even remarkable, though the Buddha piece stood out for me above the others. It might have been the Kerouac link that did it for me, a true link in with his words and not a mere name-drop, and adding dimension to a small and otherwise on-the-face-of-it quite bland piece. I HATE it when people name-drop just for the sake of making their poem look more important than it is. Nor am I a fan of the 'fashions' that come and go, like the obligatory piece of fruit everyone started mentioning in their writing (not here, on other writing sites I was at) or a specific colour - the poems started to feel more a paint-by-number creation than a living, breathing work of art. Writing to a set menu, unless the writer's skills are advanced enough to transcend that, is (imo) always a mistake.

Fashion for fruit poetry?!!! lol that's a new one on me!

 

[butters]

Fashion for fruit poetry?!!! lol that's a new one on me!

well, to be fair this was back a couple of years, just before I was offline for two years. a few famous poets seemed to be touted around where pieces had fruit in them as some sort of counterpoint to the aridity in apoem, or as the metaphor for luscious buttocks, or pussy - that sort of thing. All of a sudden, the sites seemed filled with poems that had just about no reasonable need for a fruit to be in it, but there they were - apricots, peaches, persimmons, apricots again (god, they were so fond of apricots with their little cherubic bums), plums - mostly soft fruits and few bananas, the odd lime. oh, and mangoes, they were big. damn, I even used mangoes myself once
used to be a bit wordier back then, too, having been reading whitman over and over, lol.

excerpt from 'follows on':

from my mouth to your mouth -
great gifts given thoughtlessly.
my breath's caressed your pink and bubbling sacs;
i am intimate with you beyond imagining,
my gift transparent and without motive.
i take
as thoughtlessly as i give -
as you take
and give
as he and she and they and those
take
and give

in the reckless scant of life,
in the ripening of fat mangoes;
in soft membranous flap of gill,
through sparkling rill and hollow's faithful cling
where grow such foreign fleshy things
in thrash and meld of succulent structure;

 

[UnderYourSpell]

Well I have got some 'fruity' ones posted as in how to eat a banana etc but they weren't written because of fashion

 

[lorencino]

snip

excerpt from 'follows on':

from my mouth to your mouth -
great gifts given thoughtlessly.
my breath's caressed your pink and bubbling sacs;
i am intimate with you beyond imagining,
my gift transparent and without motive.
i take
as thoughtlessly as i give -
as you take
and give
as he and she and they and those
take
and give

in the reckless scant of life,
in the ripening of fat mangoes;
in soft membranous flap of gill,
through sparkling rill and hollow's faithful cling
where grow such foreign fleshy things
in thrash and meld of succulent structure;

Is this your poem, Chitbutty?

The line
<i>i am intimate with you beyond imagining</i>
kidnapped me

 

[GuiltyPleasure]

Is this your poem, Chitbutty?

If it is we should kidnap her and keep her here in the PFD.

 

[lorencino]

*Googles Scout's Manual *

The scout's manual in the 1950s/1960s (British version not Boy Scouts of America) had this paragraph (or maybe more than one—it is about 50 years since I looked) about self-abuse being something that a man would never do and was restricted to young boys and decadent men and it drained your virility blah, blah, blah. At first I had no idea what the manual was going on about but I was curious even fascinated by this strong call to avoid doing something or the other. Then the colour drained from by face and a chill went through my body as the horrifying realization crept through my consciousness that they were talking about this amazing new pleasure I had recently discovered in the privacy of my own bedroom one quiet afternoon. I had produced what I thought of as electricity in my body even without orgasm and I loved it and did it whenever I was alone. (I was not a boy scout so I had free time)

after a few weeks of dry masturbation, I had my first orgasm and electricity become lighting bolts and I had a great time for a few glorious years without a clue that I was doing anything wrong. I knew, instinctively, that I had to keep it private but never for a moment that I should not be doing it. Then came the day at a friends house when I was dipping into his Scout's Manual.

I left quietly, stunned into silence. Thus began my great struggle to escape the sin of self-abuse. Fortunately, I never did escape into the insanity of abstinence.

 

[butters]

Is this your poem, Chitbutty?

The line
<i>i am intimate with you beyond imagining</i>
kidnapped me

If it is we should kidnap her and keep her here in the PFD.

yeah, an excerpt from a piece published in Cold Eels (a smallpress book created with groups of work by twelve poets, including myself) in 2005. The quoted part is my favourite, though. The whole thing's about breathing, and how we all share the same breaths as they move around the world, between us, animals, plantlife ... Some bits are better than others, and I can see places I'd make changes for improvement now but it's already published so it's a bit late. The pink and bubbling sacs being lungs, of course

 

[lorencino]

yeah, an excerpt from a piece published in Cold Eels (a smallpress book created with grups of work by twelve poets, including myself) in 2005. The quoted part is my favourite, though. The whole thing's about breathing, and how we all share the same breaths as they move around the world, between us, animals, plantlife ... Some bits are better than others, and I can see places I'd make changes for improvement now but it's already published so it's a bit late. The pink and bubbling sacs being lungs, of course

So how can I read the whole poem and anything else you've written?

 

[butters]

So how can I read the whole poem and anything else you've written?

you want to?

oh - ok then, I'll send you some stuff if you want. I've a few little pieces here on Writing Live, the 007 challenge and more over at Edit Red, but I'll pick a few from across the years if you have time. I'm not looking for praise or reviews sice I know you're pushed for time, but if you want to comment then simple honesty does me just fine. Some of the pieces I've written embarrass me now, to be honest, but I keep them to remind me how we all change and grow as writers and that big-heads get bumped

 

[lorencino]

you want to?

oh - ok then, I'll send you some stuff if you want. I've a few little pieces here on Writing Live, the 007 challenge and more over at Edit Red, but I'll pick a few from across the years if you have time. I'm not looking for praise or reviews sice I know you're pushed for time, but if you want to comment then simple honesty does me just fine. Some of the pieces I've written embarrass me now, to be honest, but I keep them to remind me how we all change and grow as writers and that big-heads get bumped

I want!

 

[UnderYourSpell]

thankyou to lorencino for your kind mention .... funnily enough I had to work harder on Funeral shoes than I did on the halloween poem!

 

[4degrees]

thank you for reading and/or commenting on my 11:57 poem...the only sub i've done in a long time. it was actually in referance to my 30 in 30 run, and how i only had 3 minutes left before i missed a day. but i suppose the overall inner disappointments kind of bleed through...

 

[GuiltyPleasure]

Thanks to vrosej10, normal jean, lorencino and UnderYourSpell for reading and commenting so kindly on Neighbours

 

[SoshiSed]

New Poetry Recommendation seems to have been abandoned. I really enjoyed that thread when I first came to Literotica and I learnt a lot from it. Now it seems to be of scant interest to the poets here. I have tried to fill the vacuum in the past few weeks, but am beginning to get a hangover from seeing too much of my personal and somewhat eccentric tastes reflected there. There are scores of people here who are far more capable than I am and I can't help wondering if, perhaps, Literotica has burnt itself out as a serious poetry venue.

Makes me sad.

A bit of a slump perhaps, but never burnt out Thank you for the mention of my last submission "Big Girl's Don't Bleed". Your efforts with the recommendation thread are very much appreciated. Thank you.

 

[butters]

So ok, I've finished my review of poems up today from yesterday. Couldn't cover every single piece but they're well worth a read. Maybe check 'em out when you've time. There's more to them than meets the eye!

p.s a question. when we review a piece are we meant to let the author know about that, and if so do we do it through pm or drop them a heads up on their poem's comments thingy?

 

[lorencino]

So ok, I've finished my review of poems up today from yesterday. Couldn't cover every single piece but they're well worth a read. Maybe check 'em out when you've time. There's more to them than meets the eye!

p.s a question. when we review a piece are we meant to let the author know about that, and if so do we do it through pm or drop them a heads up on their poem's comments thingy?

Traditionally, give them a heads up on their poem's comments thingymabobby. Those poets who don't allow comments must miss out.

Although I appreciate that most reviewers will have neither the time nor the inclination to review as extensively as you have done today, know that I really appreciate seeing what you thought of the poems in such detail. I hope I can count on you to appear every Wednesday with the same level of comment and detail.

To the other reviewers out there who haven't signed up for a day in spite of the fact that you have oodles of time: "If not now, when?"

. . . and no-one expects all reviewers to be as detailed as chipbutty but please don't give her a hard time about it for I take my pleasures (few as they are) where I can and reviews like this are one of them.

 

[UnderYourSpell]

you all have my undying gratitude