To err is human - to forgive, divine.

[LukkyKnight]

Ramb, I think you're a very brave man to not only face a woman who has caused you such heartache, but to then admit it in this curious little realm at lit. I don't think you owe anybody justification for being such a kind, forgiving soul that you offer another human being a second chance - it would be much easier to lash out and vent anger in a vitriolic tirade.

Those who cannot imagine caring enough about another human being enough to grant them the opportunity to make amends for mistakes must be very, very scared that if they were to grow close to another person they'd be hurt beyond their capacity to cope and recover. As to the exhibition of this fear made manifest in a name-calling thread ripe with thinly veiled rhetoric, what more would you expect of those who have so much growing yet to do?

Perhaps they can learn from your example. At worst, those of us who dare to dream see no weakness in you, merely shallowness in those who only know to spout derisively in their ignorance and fear.

 

[Soblue]

Nice thoughts Lukky. I don't think he owes anyone an explanation. Let it be.

 

[QuickDuck]

/agree

 

[cybergirly]

Well said lukky,

I totally agree. Who amongst us has not made a mistake? It takes a strong person to share this especially here, in the troll ridden land of lit. I certainly do not see any weakness in Ram, he's showing amazing strenght not only in his ability to forgive but also in his ability to trust.

 

[Monazwx]

Ditto.
Any guy who can open his heart again after such an event has shown an amazing strength of character.

 

[intrigued]

 

[lavender]

I am amazingly forgiving. I think you can forgive someone for cheating on you. I think you can forgive someone for doing many things.

But, what happened to Rambrat was abusive - not in a physical sense but in a deeply emotional sense. It was intentionally abusive.

Think how your sentiments would go over to one who has dealt with battered women.

There are some things that demonstrate such antisocial or destructive behavior that you can forgive and move forward, but you don't have to further include these people in your life.

Forgiveness is one thing. Allowing a helpful hand and an open heart is noble. To consciously subject yourself to this type of treatment in the future, is poor judgment.

 

[LukkyKnight]

I am amazingly forgiving. I think you can forgive someone for cheating on you. I think you can forgive someone for doing many things.

But, what happened to Rambrat was abusive - not in a physical sense but in a deeply emotional sense. It was intentionally abusive.

Think how your sentiments would go over to one who has dealt with battered women.

There are some things that demonstrate such antisocial or destructive behavior that you can forgive and move forward, but you don't have to further include these people in your life.

Forgiveness is one thing. Allowing a helpful hand and an open heart is noble. To consciously subject yourself to this type of treatment in the future, is poor judgment.

I agree, but find that in Rambrat's case the issue is, in fact, forgiveness - I do not know enough to judge it otherwise. Being forgiving is not the same as allowing yourself to be walked on. Once is not inherently abuse, and I am far from error free myself.

 

[tulip2lipservice]

Well Put Lukky!

We all have our own path to travel in life and decisions that we feel are best for us. Are some of those choices easy, no. To forgive a person is one of the most difficult things one can do however it creates a very positive outcome with less baggage. A lot of credit should be directed to Ram for the choice to live. To face the challenges that may lay before him and to work them out as best as possible.

We as a community of lit have no reason to judge another for showing a common human characteristic of forgiveness. In reality none of what happened within the confines of lit boards has no direct affect on any of us unless we are literally involved in it. From my perspective there are only a small number that were. So as an outsider reading about it all I can only say my hat is off to you Ram and I hope that things work out no matter what they will be in your favor.

Peace,
Tulip

 

[Debbie]

I would forgive her, but never trust her again.
I am not judging Rambrat, what he does in his
life is his choice. I care about him as a person
and if this was a friend of mine in real life
I would still say the same thing.

Caring about a person and telling them what you think does
not necessarily go hand in hand with judging them or dissing their
decision.

 

[Debbie]

Interesting thread.

 

[Guest]

 

[Debbie]

Hey, girl. Great taste you have!

This is why I have such an amazing crush on LK! *swoon* Masterful usage of the English Language!

Hi Luscious Lioness, it is lovely to see you back!
LK certainly has a great way with words.
Just one of the few things I like about him, but don't tell him
I said that.

 

[LukkyKnight]

Hi Luscious Lioness, it is lovely to see you back!
LK certainly has a great way with words.
Just one of the few things I like about him, but don't tell him
I said that.

I heard that.

 

[sterlingclay]

I agree, but find that in Rambrat's case the issue is, in fact, forgiveness - I do not know enough to judge it otherwise. Being forgiving is not the same as allowing yourself to be walked on. Once is not inherently abuse, and I am far from error free myself.

Title - Almost perfect.

Forgiveness is a necessity in this world. I ask for it as freely as I give it.

I don't know what happened to Rambrat, but the topic is an interesting one.

 

[LukkyKnight]

Title - Almost perfect.

Forgiveness is a necessity in this world. I ask for it as freely as I give it.

I don't know what happened to Rambrat, but the topic is an interesting one.

He trusted somebody, got his heart hammered, and found the courage and strength to trust the person who hurt him again.

 

[sterlingclay]

He trusted somebody, got his heart hammered, and found the courage and strength to trust the person who hurt him again.

Yeah, I'm in the dog house with someone and I'm still asking for forgiveness. Maybe one day.

And I've been one the flip side. My heart is still black and blue from my ex but I have forgiven her. However, it is a lesson learned. Just because you've forgiven someone, doesn't mean they have access to your life again. They had to be forgiven for a reason.

Can the person you've forgiven learn from their mistake? That is what I always ask myself before allowing a person back into my life.

 

[LukkyKnight]

Yeah, sterling, there's always at least two dimensions - how much has the hurt scarred you, which affects how much you trust ANYbody, and how much can you forgive the one who inflicted the pain - neither of which inherently determines that you should let them back in.

 

[sterlingclay]

A coin has two sides, just like a story... And then there's the outcome. Life's tough, where's my helmet?

 

[LukkyKnight]

That was YOUR helmet? Sorry, I couldn't read the tag. I let perky have it.

 

[His_kitty]

Sometimes I wonder if I'm a fool for forgiving people who most wouldn't if they were in my place, but that's just my nature. I'm always willing to overlook the past if the person is sincere in their apolgies. I hope that if I ever did something stupid that someone would give me a second chance.

To me it's easier to hold a grudge against someone who has or you feel has hurt you and far harder to forgive them. But in the end you need to for yourself, for your own peace.

So if he's been able to forgive her, who are we to judge?

 

[Jimi]

Well said, Brother KnighT...

He trusted somebody, got his heart hammered, and found the courage and strength to trust the person who hurt him again.

That makes Rambrat one heck of a Mensch in my book.

 

[LukkyKnight]

...who are we to judge?

Judgemental reactions to human behavior are deeply rooted in our fears.