This must be...

[SilverHyperion]

Well, I just met a wonderful Dom and had a great weekend with him, getting to know him, and having a blast in general, and now that he went back home (we live a few hours apart), I'm pretty depressed. I couldn't figure out all day why I'm so miserable after such a good time of submission, of being myself, but I'm starting to think this must be what I've seen on here about sub drop, only maybe not so severe. Can these sort of feelings come about when you haven't yet reached subspace, or is it just a funky, icky day probably? I would love anyone's perspective .

 

[Native Alien]

It is the crash of someone leaving you that you enjoyed and it is not just a submissive thing. I had this problem because of being in a LDR and when he leaves me I get depressed and blue. It usually lasts a couple of days until I readjust to being without him.

 

[SilverHyperion]

Thank you Native Alien . While I wish none of us had to feel this I'm glad it's not just some crazy thing that will continue to bother me. Thanks again

 

[Native Alien]

Actually it is probably something that you will go thru for the first few times that he leaves you. Until you learn that he is coming back when he can. That just makes it a little easier to deal with is all.

 

[lassarina]

Well, I just met a wonderful Dom and had a great weekend with him, getting to know him, and having a blast in general, and now that he went back home (we live a few hours apart), I'm pretty depressed. I couldn't figure out all day why I'm so miserable after such a good time of submission, of being myself, but I'm starting to think this must be what I've seen on here about sub drop, only maybe not so severe. Can these sort of feelings come about when you haven't yet reached subspace, or is it just a funky, icky day probably? I would love anyone's perspective .

The feelings that you describe sound very natural. You spent a very good weekend with someone and it sounds like you had a wonderful time. It could be a combination of things that you have going on right now from the weather to wanting to play more. For me its hard to get back into "reality" after a time like that. i find that i spend a few days moping around until i get back into the swing of things. The feelings do pass-give it a little time!

 

[D's mariposa]

It could be just an icky funky day, but it does sound a bit bottom drop-ish. No worries, whatever it is, it's normal and will go away soon.

 

[FungiUg]

There is something called "sub drop" apparently, which kinda works like this.

When you're in a very intense situation which you are enjoying tremendously, you have a lot of adrenaline and endorphins racing around in your system.

Now both of these are regulated by your body, so it starts trying to raise the levels, but you keep pushing them...

So when you stop, the efforts of your body to drop the endorphin levels and adrenaline levels take over, and you feel like crap for the next day or so until everything comes back to normal.

Obviously this isn't limited to BDSM. I could get the same effect if I went to a fun park and played on roller coasters for several hours. The next day I would be positively shitty.

(Also, those of us who suffer depression will recognise what the body does to regulate the endorphin levels... yup, deep pits of despair!)

If you want an interesting experiment, try the following: each a small lunch at about 12, make it a salad with no bread or carbohydrates and no sugar.

Then at about 3 o'clock eat some chocolate.

For the next half hour or so, you'll feel all bouncy! But by the time four o'clock hits, you will feel soooo tired. You may even get the shakes.

Similar effect in play -- the body sees the sugar levels rising, so it dumps a whole heap of insulin into your system to counteract it, and your sugar levels bottom out!

Anyway, hopefully that gives you an idea of what's going on.

 

[His Flower]

If you want an interesting experiment, try the following: each a small lunch at about 12, make it a salad with no bread or carbohydrates and no sugar.

Then at about 3 o'clock eat some chocolate.

For the next half hour or so, you'll feel all bouncy! But by the time four o'clock hits, you will feel soooo tired. You may even get the shakes.

Hehehe...that's ME, but not chocolate, for me it's the coffee; yet I still drink it.

But back on topic. Silver, for me, it would just be that I plainly miss him too much. I think that's what usually happen in long distance relationships. But it'll be better. I promise

His Flower

 

[FungiUg]

Hehehe...that's ME, but not chocolate, for me it's the coffee; yet I still drink it.

Depends how efficient your kidneys are, I guess. But yeah, you could have the same effect as the blood levels rise in your caffienne stream.

One of the submissive women I have always gets this effect now, and knows to plan for it. So the day after a session, she just has some quite, relaxing no-stress time set aside.