They are cheesy, they are cheap, they are BDSM Limericks!

[monster666]

We get so serious here I thought a thread dedicated to fun would be - er - fun. Here are the rules:

1. All posts must contain an original limerick. Try to acknowlege a masterpiece with one of your own.

2. No reposts of existing limericks allowed - not even your own. all posts should be original, made up on the fly.

3. Bad limericks are allowed. Really bad ones are encouraged.

4. Base and in poor taste is fine, as long as someone is likely to be offended.

5. Limericks about other members of this board are encouraged. If you don't have S&M skin and a sense of humor, don't read the thread any further.

So, in order to follow my own rules, I'll make one up now and close this post.

There once was a woman from 'frisco
Who picked up a Dom at a disco
He took one look at her toys
made an astonished noise
and asked "Where does this go?"

 

[Merelan]

cym is a lady of pleasure
who drives me to drink in my leisure.
Thoughts of her squealing,
seem so appealing,
yet these are the ones that I treasure.


Gads, that was awful.

 

[Merelan]

I once wandered onto a porn site,
it happened one dark stormy night.
All alone and in need,
I sat and did read,
and now am addicted to Lit.

Geesh, they are getting worse and worse!

One more....

My body thrums with a need,
to kneel and be snapped to a lead.
But she lives far away,
so alone I must play,
and my hungers alone I shall feed.

Okay, it is safe. I quit.

 

[monster666]

Several in the BDSM limerick thread would lurk
Looking for something with which to jerk
Elsewhere they found it
And began to pound it
thinking "that monster's gotta get a better quirk!"

 

[WriterDom]

Writerdom has a very nice dick
that all the subs want to lick
When he sticks it butter
all the young ones shudder
because they know deep down, he's sick

 

[Ebonyfire]

There once was a young sub named rick,
Who couldn't stop touching his prick
he was caught while he stroked
his Domme he provoked,
and now his poor chicken is choked!

Ebony

 

[WriterDom]

She pushed in the buttplug too deep
The poor sissy started to weep
The doctor has seen it before
He will know you're a whore
Sometimes you sow what you reap

 

[Ebonyfire]

I bought a new toy named Nexus,
It came by Fed Ex from Texas,
my sub I will fuck,
while saving a buck,
since I can't afford a new Lexus!

 

[monster666]

That kinky little sub suck-slut lilfreak
had to suck her doms dick for a week
when up came some goo
she thought she was though
but it was just precum coming out for a peek

 

[NemoAlia]

Dedicated to Waylong Cok:

An innocent boy wearing glasses
Discovers his girlfriend likes asses
All welted and red
And tied to the bed--
He likes how much greener this grass is!

 

[NemoAlia]

And in an effort to up my post count, I figured I'd post this one separately:

"Did you have a fling with the hose?
You're all loaded down with wet clothes!"
"No, slave," I reply,
Unbutt'ning his fly,
"But our only clothespins are those!"

 

[monster666]

A verbose bi-beyatch named RisiaSkye
went for a little hairpie
but she wouldn't stop talkin'
so the pie started walkin'
and that cute little pie went bye-bye

 

[Ebonyfire]

And in an effort to up my post count, I figured I'd post this one separately:

"Did you have a fling with the hose?
You're all loaded down with wet clothes!"
"No, slave," I reply,
Unbutt'ning his fly,
"But our only clothespins are those!"

ROTFLMAO!

Ebony

 

[Guest]

A verbose bi-beyatch named RisiaSkye
went for a little hairpie
but she wouldn't stop talkin'
so the pie started walkin'
and that cute little pie went bye-bye

LOL

Of course, that never happens, love. In person, my verbosity is more entertaining.

 

[RisiaSkye]

Um, that was me, getting logged out again. I don't know what's up with that.

 

[Ebonyfire]

This one's for You Monster...

The monster who sports three sixes
loves to look at CBT pixes
He browsed the pic thread
and then scratched his head
cause to his surprise there his dick sits!

Ebony

 

[monster666]

Re: This one's for You Monster...

lol.. I guess I had that one coming at some point. Okay, here's one for you!

The Domme they call Ebonyfire
stuck her sub's dick under a tire
she wanted some tread
before she took him to bed
and bound him up with some wire!

The monster who sports three sixes
loves to look at CBT pixes
He browsed the pic thread
and then scratched his head
cause to his surprise there his dick sits!

Ebony

 

[monster666]

Killermuffin!

Professing to be vanilla was Killermuffin
who was non-stop denyin' and bluffin'
but when she took her test
she was kinky as the rest
and to that she could hardly say nothin'

 

[Ebonyfire]

Re: Re: This one's for You Monster...

lol.. I guess I had that one coming at some point. Okay, here's one for you!

The Domme they call Ebonyfire
stuck her sub's dick under a tire
she wanted some tread
before she took him to bed
and bound him up with some wire!

LOL, I know I deserved that one!

Ebony

 

[NemoAlia]

Following this thread has made me wonder about the changing role of meter in our perception of poetry. I started a thread about it in the poetry forum.

That being said, here's my requisite limerick for this post:

I've heard of a writer named Peter
Whom every girl makes want to beat her.
"Please sir, tell us when
will this ever end?"
"As soon as your poems fit the meter!"

Hm... turns out that's a little more incendiary than I meant it to be. Feel free to send me limerick-ish swats on my backside in response. Also, in case you're interested in reading my thoughtful post on the same subject, it's on a thread on the poetry forum called "meter."

 

[Ebonyfire]

I feel robbed!

Where are the cheesy limericks? I need cheesy limericks!

Ebony

 

[NemoAlia]

Our Ebony wished for some cheese
That she could ingest when she pleased:
"My long raven hair
Whips wild in the air,"
Her flogger's creating a breeze!

 

[Ebonyfire]

Our Ebony wished for some cheese
That she could ingest when she pleased:
"My long raven hair
Whips wild in the air,"
Her flogger's creating a breeze!

Now that's cheesy! MMM Good! Thanks LOL

Ebony

 

[cymbidia]

The BDSM Forum at Lit
Contain perverts who are close-knit
Said Risia to T
You're gonna Top me
Then we'll switch and to me you'll submit.

 

[Merelan]

Monster you have a lot to answer for....

For Shyguy...

A new cane in his hand,
he travels across the North Land.
Learning the knowledge,
you don't learn in college,
He leaves behind butts nice and tanned.



For all of us...

Whip me, beat me, make me your slave,
that is what others think that we rave.
the truth of the matter,
we aren't mad as hatter,
it is only acceptance we crave.