The Worst Chain Story Ever

[MathGirl]

Re: Chapter One has done its worst

It must just have been the appalling content that stopped Literotica dead in its tracks.

"Chapter 1" certainly stopped me dead in my tracks for the several hours it took to read it. Who said that something truly awful can't also be unreasonably long?
MG

 

[Guest]

Ironists unite!

I was being subtly ironic but why should I bother? Subtle irony is lost on Literotica. (Sobs loudly).

Ogg: keep your ironical member up (and any other parts of you that tend to ironical leanings).

Drink to celebrate; you are an artist therefore even purposely prostituting your art achieves transcendance. Muses always forgive, or rather, if true there is never a question of forgiveness or judgment. (I like that idea fine; it's my own.)

I have read about the hairy trio and the breastfeeding session: further proof of your muse's credentials. For this reader you provided much satisfaction and tongue in cheek (or was that an imaginary nipple?)

Wish you hadn't recalled to mind cracked nipples. Ouch!

I understand Flicka's and MG's comments as ironical but feel the necessity of some grandiosity in remarking on the grand first chapter.

Always in awe, Perdita

 

[DurtGurl]

Totally Awesome!!!

Always in awe, Perdita

Some people are very easily awed.
DG

 

[Guest]

lasagnalization

Actually, Perdy, I have had men lactin...lazcani... shot a milky load on me or in me several times...

Svenskayayayaya: You always go your own delightful way. Yes, men have their own sweet sticky milk and amazingly never dry up (a shortcoming in female teats, but I often ponder why men only have the one).

Perdy perplexed

 

[Guest]

Awe, awe, awe...

Some people are very easily awed.
DG

I am in awe of awe (and ewes!) Purdition

 

[oggbashan]

Re: Re: Chapter One has done its worst

"Chapter 1" certainly stopped me dead in my tracks for the several hours it took to read it. Who said that something truly awful can't also be unreasonably long?
MG

If it is to be "The Worst" then being unreasonably long is part of the attempt to achieve true badness.

However, as my stories go, it isn't that long. The magnum opus that still has the scaffolding around it and won't be submitted this side of Christmas will run to 300 A4 pages at least.

I try to give value for money.

Og

 

[DurtGurl]

Re: Re: Re: Chapter One has done its worst

I try to give value for money.

Dear Og,
Your quite right. A real stinker like "Chapter 1" should allow the reader no escape until he starts seriously thinking about sticking his finger down his throat.
Admiringly,
DG

 

[Svenskaflicka]

Re: lasagnalization

Svenskayayayaya: You always go your own delightful way. Yes, men have their own sweet sticky milk and amazingly never dry up (a shortcoming in female teats, but I often ponder why men only have the one).

Perdy perplexed

I've wondered about that, too. Especially after visiting a sex toy shop, where I found a dildo that had two dicks. Who modeled for that thing?

 

[Guest]

Re: Re: lasagnalization

I've wondered about that, too. Especially after visiting a sex toy shop, where I found a dildo that had two dicks. Who modeled for that thing?

I've seen the kind that are like one long sausage with a dickhead at each end; I think dykettes put them to good use. Now that's the original model I'd like to see. But maybe it was just a short snake with flukey DNA.

p.s. I am enjoying the first HP book.

 

[Svenskaflicka]

Hey Purdy!

The sequel to "The Squibs" is done, and posted to restrictedsection.org.
D'ya want a preview..?

 

[Guest]

Hey Purdy! The sequel to "The Squibs" is done, and posted to restrictedsection.org. D'ya want a preview..?

Yes, please. Can you send it by email like before? I just can't register/logon to that site. (I'll PM my address in case you don't still have it.) O, I can't wait. What a treat.
xoxo, Purd

 

[Guest]

for Mrs. Snape

Flicka: your PM box is full; I send it to your email. P.

 

[Svenskaflicka]

*giggle*
I sure hope J-Le doesn't see that title - she wants it for herself! Though I know someone who's already snapped it from underneath her nose. *hint!*

I hope you like it. It's Veeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeery long! More than 20 Word-pages. Phew!

 

[Guest]

*giggle* I sure hope J-Le doesn't see that title - she wants it for herself! Though I know someone who's already snapped it from underneath her nose. *hint!*
Who is J-Le? I hope the 'hint' is you.

I'm reading it now; what a great surprise in the beginning. P.

 

[Svenskaflicka]

J-Le = Just-Legal. She wants to be Mrs Snape.

I won't hint anymore. Just read on...

 

[Guest]

You can be his the godmother.

Flicka, you imaginative Svenska Potterite:

Wonderful! I got goose bumps when he asked her. And the kids' reactions to the hand kissing was so cute and funny. I await the next chapter. Write faster.

Purd

p.s. more SS sex scenes, please; very graphic please. Think of Alan for inspiration.

 

[Svenskaflicka]

Phew!

I'm writing, I'm writing! But I have a feeling that this third - and last - chapter will be the longest and most difficult one! So many threads to tie up. Villains to kill, couples to pair up, songs to be sung, teasing to be done...

I don't think there will be much more Snape Sex, but he will definitely play a huge part in the final chapter! And he will be very protective of his beloved daughter - I have this one scene in my head, that makes me giggle every time I think of it. Poor Snape! He hates Harry soooooo much, and no-one else does. (Well, except for a few Slytherins...)

The last chapter will bring in another favourite of mine - Sirius Black! The greatest of the old Marauders! (And the most mischievous...)The Marauders' are playing a trick on Snape

 

[Guest]

Phew! ... I'm writing, I'm writing! ... I don't think there will be much more Snape Sex

OK, glorious one, take a break. I don't care about all those other muggles or wizkids. I want Snape sex! I'm addicted, and you are the cause. I will have to write my own Snape scenes I guess. Perhaps I can find the time when I check into the Snape Sexaholics Anonymous Institute (I hear it's in Sweden). That place better have internet access. P.

p.s. what thread is this?

 

[oggbashan]

Back to the plot ...

p.s. what thread is this?

It's the thread for The Worst Chain Story Ever but it seems entirely appropriate that the thread should meander all over the place just like the story.

Og

 

[Guest]

Re: Back to the plot ...

It's the thread for The Worst Chain Story Ever but it seems entirely appropriate that the thread should meander all over the place just like the story. Og

Thank you Ogg. SF and I will take great advantage of your liberalness.

Do you write Snape sex? - Purd*

*ACK ARGHH! rhymes with ____. Crap, no, s--t, no. Help! I need a new sweet diminutive moniker.

 

[MathGirl]

Gust deserts

Dear Purd,
See what you get for calling me 'Midge?"
MG

 

[Guest]

Re: Gust deserts

Dear Purd, See what you get for calling me 'Midge?" MG

I am soooooooooooo humil, uh, humbled.

Pear

 

[Chicklet]

I would like to direct you attention chicklet to the survivor thread, Five is My number.

good god.

mv, you may be a master, but you are not *mine*

 

[Chicklet]

We need a title. Or should we stick with "The Worst Chain Story Ever"???

Well, technically, I think that the worst chain story ever would have chapters that didn't have anything to do with one another. Would be weird, eh?

 

[Guest]

profane trinity

Wow, three great arses on one thread page (MG, DG and Chicklet). I am beyond awe.

Pear

and one for Flicka of course: