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thesweetsweetness
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Azul, I hope you can remember lovely memories of your Dad with less pain, now. I hope the day is near when each memory brings nothing but happiness.
Not to hijack the thread, and I do not mean to be at all disrespectful, but this has me wondering. Does there really come a time when each memory brings happiness? Honestly wondering, and hoping its true.
Triskele
minima maxima sunt
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There's a paradox here. These things wouldn't have happened if you didn't love each other.
People who don't give a toss, don't argue. Those who love and know us best know the barbs that hurt the most. In your life you would have provided him with immense joy and pride. They are the things that endure. 
Triskele
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Hi Sweetness. I don't think it's a hijacking. It's a legitimate question we all ask when memories are hard and painful.
I think it depends on the relationship that existed. Others may have a different opinion.
I am able to remember my Nan with happiness and a few giggles now. Her passing was slow and painful over years. She grew vicious in her pain and lashed out. We were all traumatised but I lost a very special relationship well before she left us. I tried and tried to get it back. Now I can smile at her antics and recognise her fighting spirit. I can remember before that, too. She sang to us and had English rose soft soft skin. Her hugs were like sinking into pillows. Regrets are different. I can regret many things but still remember her with joy.
I lived with physical abuse at the hands of my father for many years. My bones were broken and I was denied medical treatment. I will never have a positive reaction to memories there. He still lives but self preservation is stronger than my wish for a positive relationship. I learned to accept that it wouldn't change. I have others who appreciate my love and who I am.
Triskele
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It is the person who is remembered - not their income. It is your heart and it's capacity to love that supports and shapes your family.
Your father lived his life his way. You live yours in your way; and from what I can see, you are generous, loving and giving. Being driven for another persons' ideal is not satisfying. Living the best way for you and your family definately is.
T
thesweetsweetness
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Hi Sweetness. I don't think it's a hijacking. It's a legitimate question we all ask when memories are hard and painful.
I think it depends on the relationship that existed. Others may have a different opinion.
I am able to remember my Nan with happiness and a few giggles now. Her passing was slow and painful over years. She grew vicious in her pain and lashed out. We were all traumatised but I lost a very special relationship well before she left us. I tried and tried to get it back. Now I can smile at her antics and recognise her fighting spirit. I can remember before that, too. She sang to us and had English rose soft soft skin. Her hugs were like sinking into pillows. Regrets are different. I can regret many things but still remember her with joy.
I lived with physical abuse at the hands of my father for many years. My bones were broken and I was denied medical treatment. I will never have a positive reaction to memories there. He still lives but self preservation is stronger than my wish for a positive relationship. I learned to accept that it wouldn't change. I have others who appreciate my love and who I am.
Thank you. I am sorry to hear about what happened with your father, that is awful!
I am also sorry to hear about your Nan, it sounds like you have peace with her passing, that is lovely.I lost my dad almost 12 years ago, when I was only 19. I had a very good relationship with him. His passing was sudden, unexpected and hardest to deal with, is that it was also most likely preventable, if he had received medical attention sooner than he did.
Dad had infectious pneumonia. By the time he finally went to the hospital, the infection had spread too far through too much of his body, there was nothing to be done. Spicy Southern Belle
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Hugs, Cuddles and Love to everyone.
Have been thinking about you, Spicy. I hope your world is a little brighter every day.
Azul, I hope you can remember lovely memories of your Dad with less pain, now. I hope the day is near when each memory brings nothing but happiness.
Thank you sweetheart. I actually had several days this week that were good for the most part. It was a nice improvement.
This is definitely not hijacking. It is actually a perfect place to ask it.
I agree with Triskele. There are some things that will never turn into good memories. There are some things where the sad will fade to the back and allow the good to come back to the surface. To me it really depends on the memories and the person. *HUGS*
Thank you. I am sorry to hear about what happened with your father, that is awful!
I lost my dad almost 12 years ago, when I was only 19. I had a very good relationship with him. His passing was sudden, unexpected and hardest to deal with, is that it was also most likely preventable, if he had received medical attention sooner than he did.
Hugs for you both on losing your loved ones.
Azul..*HUGS*
Spicy Southern Belle
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T
thesweetsweetness
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Hugs to any in need.
Spicy Southern Belle
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HUGS!!!
Spicy Southern Belle
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T
thesweetsweetness
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Group hugs? 
Azuldrgon
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Triskele
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T
thesweetsweetness
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Warm *HUGS* to everybody.
Daughter just got elected to head of social justice committee at college!!!! She's so determined to make a difference - I'm sooooooooo proud of her!!!
Wow! Congratulations! That's awesome. (((hugs)))
Spicy Southern Belle
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Warm *HUGS* to everybody.
Daughter just got elected to head of social justice committee at college!!!! She's so determined to make a difference - I'm sooooooooo proud of her!!!
Congratulations!!! *hugs*
VelvetWolf
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Warm *HUGS* to everybody.
Daughter just got elected to head of social justice committee at college!!!! She's so determined to make a difference - I'm sooooooooo proud of her!!!
Congratulations to your daughter, Triskele ~ and to her proud Mom, as well!! *big hugs*
Triskele
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Azuldrgon
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Hi Fred!
I'm a bit slow, I know but...
*hugs* hello!
*Hugs for you and the daughter*
