The Perfect Match

[catalina_francisco]

Why do so many of you women say you are scared of the dominants here? None of them seem particularly scary to me. There are lots more hardcore types on almost any bdsm personal-ad board you go to.

LOL, you must have missed some things around here, and some of the Dominants' favourite tortures!! We are finding our search on the personals front is rendering only the brave, despite our insistence they are not expected to play as hard as we do. Is interesting actually, once they see some pics of our play they either back out quick or take a deep breath and say they think they would like to play and see where they want to go with it...and then there are the few who it scares the crap out of but they just can't resist being drawn to the flame.

Catalina

 

[Evil_Geoff]

Evil_Geoff,

I hadn't read this thread until just now. I read it to be honest because I saw you had posted in it.

To be honest you are on my short list for a possible RL session if I ever get up the nerve.


Question, should females go alone to a munch or fetish club? I've heard not but I don' t know why.

Fury

Dayum... gonna make me blush! Thanky kindly, ma'am, I'm honored!

And for going alone, the answer is....... "depends". Most munches are VERY safe for females to attend, attached or otherwise. They are usually held in a private room in a public venue, like a private dining room in a restaurant. Waitstaff coming in and out, lots of kinksters keeping an eye out for predators, etc.

"Fetish clubs" on the other hand can be very loosely monitored (if at all), anyone who pays at the door allowed entrance, "play at your own risk" kinds of places. Or they can be an intimate, integral part of the alternative community, run by lifestylers, closely supervised, members only kinds of places. They can be nothing more than loud dance clubs where fetish wear is encouraged, the drinks are expensive, and the S&M means "Stand & Model". Or they might be a dungeon with crosses, horses, benches, racks, whipping posts, cages... And the S&M includes extreme play.

Or they could be anything in between.

There are some places that I would recommend to a newbie, even a female going alone. Places like 1763 in Atlanta, or The Crucible in DC, or The Playhouse in Baltimore or The Sanctuary in Dallas either because I've been there, or because I've met the owners and staff, always because I trust them to look after the neophyte and welcome them to the BDSM community.

Other places I don't know if I would recommend to a single female going solo.

As always when entering a new situation, YOUR feelings of safety and security are paramount, not mine.

 

[catalina_francisco]

I would so like to visit you two! If only I could!

Fury

LOL, the subs I have played with on my own say I have an evil chuckle and whisper soft voice that combined sends shivers down their spine as they await their fate...see what happens when you play with a slave who has developed a sadistic streak!!

Catalina

 

[caela]

Question, should females go alone to a munch or fetish club? I've heard not but I don' t know why.

It might depend on where you are but I don't see any reason why not. The first munch meeting I went to I went by myself and I've never had any problems. I'm blessed to have a really nice group of people in my local munch group, they're really friendly and open to new people. I don't know if I would feel as comfortable going to a club by myself but that's just me.

 

[FurryFury]

Dayum... gonna make me blush! Thanky kindly, ma'am, I'm honored!

And for going alone, the answer is....... "depends". Most munches are VERY safe for females to attend, attached or otherwise. They are usually held in a private room in a public venue, like a private dining room in a restaurant. Waitstaff coming in and out, lots of kinksters keeping an eye out for predators, etc.

"Fetish clubs" on the other hand can be very loosely monitored (if at all), anyone who pays at the door allowed entrance, "play at your own risk" kinds of places. Or they can be an intimate, integral part of the alternative community, run by lifestylers, closely supervised, members only kinds of places. They can be nothing more than loud dance clubs where fetish wear is encouraged, the drinks are expensive, and the S&M means "Stand & Model". Or they might be a dungeon with crosses, horses, benches, racks, whipping posts, cages... And the S&M includes extreme play.

Or they could be anything in between.

There are some places that I would recommend to a newbie, even a female going alone. Places like 1763 in Atlanta, or The Crucible in DC, or The Playhouse in Baltimore or The Sanctuary in Dallas either because I've been there, or because I've met the owners and staff, always because I trust them to look after the neophyte and welcome them to the BDSM community.

Other places I don't know if I would recommend to a single female going solo.

As always when entering a new situation, YOUR feelings of safety and security are paramount, not mine.

You seem to be a good man. I never told you that I was thinking that way before but there ya go.

I am glad to hear your recommendations. That club in Hotlanta might be do-able.

*smiles*

I'm scared but more explorations are needed.

In all likelihood I wouldn't go alone really but then again, I often try things alone so I don't have to worry about other people bugging out on me. I like to survey things first and report back to my beloved.

He tends to be pretty curmudgeonly about new things, places and people.

Fury

 

[FurryFury]

LOL, the subs I have played with on my own say I have an evil chuckle and whisper soft voice that combined sends shivers down their spine as they await their fate...see what happens when you play with a slave who has developed a sadistic streak!!

Catalina

Sounds good, very good to me. And hey! I know you can fist!!!

Fury

It might depend on where you are but I don't see any reason why not. The first munch meeting I went to I went by myself and I've never had any problems. I'm blessed to have a really nice group of people in my local munch group, they're really friendly and open to new people. I don't know if I would feel as comfortable going to a club by myself but that's just me.

That's the feeling I got about it too. I'm not sure why. I'm so glad you have a good group to go to! I would not want to meet people locally. I'd want to go a bit of a distance at first.
(That career consideration paranoia thing again. Also it would really suck to run into some relatives or something.)

Fury

 

[Evil_Geoff]

..... I'd want to go a bit of a distance at first.
(That career consideration paranoia thing again. Also it would really suck to run into some relatives or something.)

Fury

Just remember hon... if you run into family or friends at a kinky event, you have as much dirt on them as they would have on you.... Why else would they be there??? *LOL*

But professional concerns I can understand. I was cop for 17 years and only got kinky the last few. I was paranoid as hell about it until I understood that my inner sadists was more important to my health and sanity than my paycheck. Then I didn't give a rip and was pretty much out at work too. Crying shame Angelina Jolie won't become our BDSM "poster girl" even though we all know she's a freak! *GRIN* And OMG, if Shania Twain ever admits she's in the lifestyle, I'll start going to country concerts...

 

[caela]

That's the feeling I got about it too. I'm not sure why. I'm so glad you have a good group to go to! I would not want to meet people locally. I'd want to go a bit of a distance at first.
(That career consideration paranoia thing again. Also it would really suck to run into some relatives or something.)

Fury

Ahhh, I'm lucky in that I don't really have to worry about the career thing yet because I'm not working right now while I'm finishing school (22 credits this term and then I'm done wooohoooo!!!) and I'll likely end up working a distance from home when I'm done. Running into relatives would truly suck! Thankfully mine live far enough away that that's not a problem I need to worry about.

 

[catalina_francisco]

OK, just for KC, I have come up with one or 3 I can name.....think EKVITKAR would be up there at the top of the list.....good dose of sadism, dry humour, emotions, realism. Evil Geoff is also someone who could be appealing for similar reasons. Then there is the elusive Andante, but think shy slave needs him all to herself For female domination, an area I am not ready to contemplate usually, Netzach is the only one I would trust with that. Alas, though one can imagine, there is no replacement for the real perfect match, my huggable, kissable, fuckable sadist, Francisco.

Catalina

 

[FurryFury]

Just remember hon... if you run into family or friends at a kinky event, you have as much dirt on them as they would have on you.... Why else would they be there??? *LOL*

But professional concerns I can understand. I was cop for 17 years and only got kinky the last few. I was paranoid as hell about it until I understood that my inner sadists was more important to my health and sanity than my paycheck. Then I didn't give a rip and was pretty much out at work too. Crying shame Angelina Jolie won't become our BDSM "poster girl" even though we all know she's a freak! *GRIN* And OMG, if Shania Twain ever admits she's in the lifestyle, I'll start going to country concerts...

Yeah but Evil_Geoff, you don't know my relatives and believe me you don't want to! Although there is an Uncle, np. LOL.

Shania is hot but her music often isn't that country. Thanks in part to Mutt I believe.

Fury

Ahhh, I'm lucky in that I don't really have to worry about the career thing yet because I'm not working right now while I'm finishing school (22 credits this term and then I'm done wooohoooo!!!) and I'll likely end up working a distance from home when I'm done. Running into relatives would truly suck! Thankfully mine live far enough away that that's not a problem I need to worry about.

Good for you!

*smiles*

Fury

 

[stirbird]

LOL, you must have missed some things around here, and some of the Dominants' favourite tortures!! We are finding our search on the personals front is rendering only the brave, despite our insistence they are not expected to play as hard as we do. Is interesting actually, once they see some pics of our play they either back out quick or take a deep breath and say they think they would like to play and see where they want to go with it...and then there are the few who it scares the crap out of but they just can't resist being drawn to the flame.

Catalina

I definitely missed "favorite tortures" threads--send a link if you ever see those again. I'm not going to try the forum search function as self-torture isn't my thing.

I expect a lot of the profiles I've seen on personal-ad sites are all bark and no bite. Sending people pictures is a good idea--let them see the reality. The only trouble with pics is that it can give newbies the wrong impression: things often look a lot worse than they feel, at least in my experience. But for an experienced sub, these can give a pretty accurate idea of your level of play.

 

[catalina_francisco]

I definitely missed "favorite tortures" threads--send a link if you ever see those again. I'm not going to try the forum search function as self-torture isn't my thing.

I expect a lot of the profiles I've seen on personal-ad sites are all bark and no bite. Sending people pictures is a good idea--let them see the reality. The only trouble with pics is that it can give newbies the wrong impression: things often look a lot worse than they feel, at least in my experience. But for an experienced sub, these can give a pretty accurate idea of your level of play.

LOL, we always make sure we give warning ahead and explanations and reassurances we do not want or expect the same from them. As to the thread question, no specific threads, just lots of posts and at times pics referring to play experiences and life situations.

Catalina

 

[Kajira Callista]

ok here is my list. lol i could not just pick one.

Male Dominants
Eviktar
Rosco
Geoff
AA
DVS

Female Dominants
Shadowsdream
Netzach

now dont ask me to pick one cause if it were up to me...all of them in the same room at one time would be my choice.

 

[catalina_francisco]

ok here is my list. lol i could not just pick one.

Male Dominants
Eviktar
Rosco
Geoff
AA
DVS

Female Dominants
Shadowsdream
Netzach

now dont ask me to pick one cause if it were up to me...all of them in the same room at one time would be my choice.

LOL, we share some similar tastes again!! Hmm, having them all in one room could be counter productive....they might all decide to compare notes, experiences etc and leave you sitting there on the sideline listening in....shucks then you would have to offer yourself again, just to get their focus back.

Catalina

 

[Kajira Callista]

LOL, we share some similar tastes again!! Hmm, having them all in one room could be counter productive....they might all decide to compare notes, experiences etc and leave you sitting there on the sideline listening in....shucks then you would have to offer yourself again, just to get their focus back.

Catalina

just being in their presence would be enough for me. im a simple girl.

 

[catalina_francisco]

just being in their presence would be enough for me. im a simple girl.

LOL, uh huh....no pain, no play? Surely not!!

C

 

[shy slave]

ok here is my list. lol i could not just pick one.

Male Dominants
Eviktar
Rosco
Geoff
AA
DVS

Female Dominants
Shadowsdream
Netzach

now dont ask me to pick one cause if it were up to me...all of them in the same room at one time would be my choice.

I would have guessed Shadowsdream as the first person for you.

Eviktar is a surprise, will have to look out for his posts and work out what particular pain filled joy he would bring you

 

[shy slave]

Catalina ~ you and Francisco are playing with couples as well....

That has my mind thinking

As for the elusive Andante, yes I do like him to myself, but my Mum always told me to share my toys

 

[ShyGuy68]

I still can't say who a perfect match from here would be for me, but there are a few ladies here I would like to meet in real lift, and then see where it takes us. They are:

Snowy
Merelan (even though she hardly ever posts here)
Shy Slave
Miss Diva
Blushing Bottom
Chris9

 

[Kajira Callista]

I would have guessed Shadowsdream as the first person for you.

Eviktar is a surprise, will have to look out for his posts and work out what particular pain filled joy he would bring you

I think that with each name i chose, there is more then pain filled joy involved.

 

[Andante]

I would so like to visit you two! If only I could!

Fury

Well, why can't you?

 

[Andante]

..... Then there is the elusive Andante, but think shy slave needs him all to herself ......
Catalina

'Elusive' Ummm, errrr.... well.... do you people have any idea what kind of hard work it is, just trying to keep up with some of the stuff going on here. I mean; for some odd reason you have chosen to communicate in some bloody, weird, foreign language!
I realise I don't post much. I'm not going to list my excuses; I guess we could all come up with some of those. But I am going to tell you all that I mostly enjoy reading your posts (even a few of the cookie-infected ones ) and that I have learned a lot from thinking about what I read, and discussing it with shy.

And a happy New Year to all of you

 

[Andante]

.....Then there is the elusive Andante, but think shy slave needs him all to herself ......Catalina

And shame on me for not mentioning how honoured I am to be on your list!
I am not sure I would meet your expectations, though. Shy tells me I am a sadist, but you are a fucking MASOCHIST!

Oh, and just because of you accusing me of being elusive, I decided to break out of the stone and reveal my true colours

 

[shy slave]

small Hijack

Now you see why I keep him to myself

 

[catalina_francisco]

'Elusive' Ummm, errrr.... well.... do you people have any idea what kind of hard work it is, just trying to keep up with some of the stuff going on here. I mean; for some odd reason you have chosen to communicate in some bloody, weird, foreign language!
I realise I don't post much. I'm not going to list my excuses; I guess we could all come up with some of those. But I am going to tell you all that I mostly enjoy reading your posts (even a few of the cookie-infected ones ) and that I have learned a lot from thinking about what I read, and discussing it with shy.

And a happy New Year to all of you

LOL, yes I know what it is like, from an observer's and slave position....one of my tasks is to act as editor for posts and sometimes work documents when he feels he needs to check he has the right english word, spelling, grammar for what he wants to say....oh, and also walking english thesaurus for those moments when he can't find just the right word. and wow, thanks for coming out or obscurity....now off ye go to the faces thread, hmmm, do Doms do the Tails thread too shy?

Catalina