The Last Thing You Thought...

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*props herself up on the wall and watches the loonies with sleepy eyes*

Y'all are just plain nuts, know that?

*snickers and wanders off to order pizza*
 
If she keeps promising she'll give you the pizza, but then continues to drag out the conversation, and finally leaves you only a little of the topping, you're on LOST.


That one hurt to do, because I loved LOST start to finish, but... I couldn't resist.
 
If you open the door and she speaks really fast and you hear "Yuuuuup" in the background you're on Storage Wars.
 
If she shows up and Jeff Probst is providing useless narration in the background you're on Survivor.
 
IF she delivers the pizza and then is found raped and murdered somewhere in NY.. You're on Law and Order SVU
 
IF she delivers pizza and goes home to smoke pot in the basement sitting in a circle and passing it around.. You're on That 70's Show...
 
If she comes to your house then takes you hostage inside to somehow reconnect with her estranged son you're on Flashpoint.
 
If a guy and two puppets are hanging out behind her, making fun of everything the two of you say and do, you're in MST3K.
 
If you open the door and she starts opening the pizza box, but everything goes black before you know what's going on, you're on The Sopranos
 
If she has a stack of pizzas with her, and tells you about the ways she's going to test how badly different toppings burn the roof of your mouth, along with another pizza box wired to explode for no apparent reason, then you're in Mythbusters.
 
If she has a stack of pizzas with her, and tells you about the ways she's going to test how badly different toppings burn the roof of your mouth, along with another pizza box wired to explode for no apparent reason, then you're in Mythbusters.

Awesome.

If it's the fifteenth pizza she's delivered and none have been that memorable but she just keeps coming back, you're in American Idol.
 
If she sounds oddly like the person that did the voice for the titular character in Bobby's World, you're in America's Got Talent.
 
If she's one delivery away from a world record, then gets fired only to be replaced by someone who looks exactly the same and does the same job, you're in Law & Order
 
If she talks about how good the pizza is, but then tells you that you don't have to take her word for it as she opens the box, then you're in Reading Rainbow.
 
If she tells you this Pizza was brought to you by the letter P and has eight, eight slices, you're on Sesame Street.
 
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