The Insult Thread

[anthrodisiac]

*rolls eyes* Some people are such bad writers they can't even notice when they didn't finish a

Yeah, I mean, sometimes I forget that I don't finish b, but I never forgot that I didn't finish a

 

[Kumquatqueen]

I generally try to avoid insulting people on Lit, but I was alerted to a post I made on the BSDM Forum, responding to a 'true dom' complaining that no experts were responding to his rapey fantasies. My last paragraph:

You're just trying to dress up wanting to get your legs over and get your every desire met, in some big words, and it's not fooling people here, because your big words and assertions are bollocks. The Russell Brand of Literotica, and I'm not sure that's even fair on Russell Brand.

 

[TheLobster]

Sometimes I wonder if all I need to be rid of you is to hand you a piece of paper where on both sides it’s written “Please turn over”.

 

[AG31]

Whew!!! Apparently I neglected to respond to an alert sometime in late July, so I didn't get any more alerts. I'm exhausted. Y'all are nuts!

 

[NuclearFairy]

Takes one to know one.

 

[sirhugs]

all sorts of nuts hang out here

 

[JTass]

I witnessed this one at the park last weekend:

Girl: "You're just mean to me because I won't sleep with you."

Boy: "Are you kidding me? I wouldn't fuck you with his dick [points at a random passerby] and him pushing [points at another random passerby]"

 

[StillStunned]

You write Loving Wives like it's Romance, Fetish like it's Erotic Couplings and Group Sex like it's Non-Erotic.

 

[Zootonius]

I witnessed this one at the park last weekend:

Girl: "You're just mean to me because I won't sleep with you."

Boy: "Are you kidding me? I wouldn't fuck you with his dick [points at a random passerby] and him pushing [points at another random passerby]"

Sounds like that Rodney Dangerfield joke,

I wouldn't a pass at your wife, she too ugly.

 

[AG31]

Ever since I said y'all are nuts, last Thursday, I've had this childhood ditty buzzing in my head. In hopes that I get some catharsis, I'm passing it on to you. Sort of a reverse insult.

I'm a little acorn round,
Lying on the cold cold ground.
Everybody steps on me.
That is why I'm cracked you see.
I'm a nut. Ksk, ksk.
I'm a nut. Ksk, ksk.
Amen. Ksk, ksk.
Amen. Ksk, ksk.

If you don't know the song, I'm hoping the tune will be intuitive.

Ksk is meant to represent the sound when you click the sides of your tongue against the back upper gum. Like tsk represents the sound when you click the tip of your tongue against the top of your mouth just behind the front teeth.

 

[anthrodisiac]

Ksk is meant to represent the sound when you click the sides of your tongue against the back upper gum.

This is madness, how does one even do this????

Sincerely, someone who has spent a couple minutes very baffled and making noises that are getting me weird looks from my cat.

JK, just realized that's back UPPER gum... explains a lot.

New insult: You're so dumb, you can't figure out your upper gum from your lower gum.

 

[sirhugs]

This is madness, how does one even do this????

Sincerely, someone who has spent a couple minutes very baffled and making noises that are getting me weird looks from my cat.

JK, just realized that's back UPPER gum... explains a lot.

New insult: You're so dumb, you can't figure out your upper gum from your lower gum.

you're so dumb you cant figure out back from front.

 

[anthrodisiac]

you're so dumb you cant figure out back from front.

Suddenly a lot of things make a lot more sense...

 

[Jada59]

I tried to read your tea leaves but they came up empty. So I did a Tarot card reading gif you. I drew The Fool.

 

[sirhugs]

Suddenly a lot of things make a lot more sense...

that's cause you're so dumb you can't tell the gum from the baseball cards.

 

[anthrodisiac]

that's cause you're so dumb you can't tell the gum from the baseball cards.

There's baseball cards in my gum??????

 

[sirhugs]

There's baseball cards in my gum??????

what were you expecting, anthro cards?