The Funeral

[intriguess]

It was a quiet affair, close friends, good business acquaintances, family, and myself. I doubted anyone there even knew who I was, but knowing Robert perhaps they all knew. I smiled, wishing he hadn't asked me to wear the red dress. It had been his favorite, the top a lush burgundy velvet, the bottom two layers of burgundy gauze. The wind made it cling to my legs and I was reminded of what I wore underneath in memory of him.

We had met about a year ago, he was just begining chemo and was looking to settle his life. They had given him six months, he always joked that my body had pulled the extra time out of him. I moved in shortly after we met, he said he needed someone vivacious to remind him of the pleasures of life.

I wiped away a tear, chemo took so much from him and he still gave away more. The house would not be the same without him. His family would undoubtedly think I was after his money, and I had no clue as to his will.

Would I be able to bear living in the home we shared? Sleep in the bed we had loved in? He had given me more than a car and a place to live, he had given me my first orgasm, he showed me how to please myself and him, even though the chemo had robbed him of attaining an erection.

I was not sure what I felt saddest about, that we made love, yet would never have a child, or that the chemo that robbed him of sex also ended up killing him.

I walked away, trying not to think of how he might have lived had he chosen another treatment.

It was after the funeral that his lawyer handed me an envelope. I wasn't sure what to expect as I sat in my car, afraid to read it. My red fingernail slide under the flap and I pulled out a letter.

It said exactly what I thought it would, that I should celebrate life, to move on and find someone to share my bed with even if I withheld my heart. That I would eventually find someone to share both with again. He ended it with, "You'll be a terrific wife and mother, Always Robert"

I didn't feel like celebrating life as I went to Robert's favorite bar, were a Irish wake was to be held. I pulled into the parking lot, composed myself and tried to ignore the feel of the lacey red bra that he had bought for me that lay underneath the dress.

OOC

I know I rambled on a bit and if this doesn't pan out I think I'll go ahead and write the whole story. For now looking for someone else at the wake to 'hit on me' and end up sharing a bed.

 

[Steiner]

OOC: I'd love to participate, I've PM'd my idea for a character.

 

[must66]

Don't like funerals

I hated going to shit like this, but even I couldn't miss giving one of my best friends his last parting wishes. I had known Robert for most of our lives. We were buds in shcool, roommates at the University, silent partners in or import business. Most of all we knew everything about each other. I hated him for not still being around. How do you just take something out of your live and forget about it. Anyway, I said my good bye, put my class ring next to his on his hand. There was a lot of people there and I think I talked to them all. There she was! Roberts wife. She had only seen me once, and that was so fast, I knew she would not know who I was. It is hard to explain, but Bob and I did a lot of dealings together and thought it was better that no one we did so. It would take to long to explain, so I won't. When Robert and I would get together for a drink or some business deal he would alway talk about her. How much he loved her and now how he wishes he was strong enough to give her the kind of loving he at one time was able to do. He had told me about the arangement they had set up, so that she could have what he could not give her. He said at first she would have nothing to do with it, but as time went by he convinced her that it was something that he truly wanted her to do. He also told her that it was the only thing that got him excited. You see Robert would set her up with different men to fuck and he would watch. He would bring pictures of her and tell me all about, how she would get her pussy eaten, or how she got into giving the guys blow jobs. I must tell you she was a knock out. A body that anyone would love to have. Sexy, sex just spilled out of her. I told Bob many times how hot I thought she was and how I wish I could put my cock into his wife. He knew what I was talking about, but really thanked me for being his friend and never tring anything. I won't be around for much longer and that is when I want you to look after her for me. Show her all the papers about our business and explain to her why we kept things to ourselfs. I am going to give her my share of our businesses. Every one was leaving and heading to Bobs favorite bar or some shit kicking Irsh wake. As I arived at the bar I saw his wife and headed her way. I introduced myself and offered her a cocktail, telling her that we saw each other once before. She smiled, excepted the offer of a cocktail, and told me how Robert would often talk about me, but never really tell her much. My eyes were became glued to her chest. The top of her dress looked like it was velvet or something like that. I could see the whole shape of her tits in the dress, her nipples were unreal, poking out as if they wanted to excape there confinment. As we sat on a couple of stools I wasn't sure but I think I see her pussy through what look like some kind of netting that made up the rest of her dress. We talked for a bit, but I needed to use the restroom, so away I went.

 

[intriguess]

I've accepted Steiner's idea as it more closely fits with what I want in this thread.

Thanks for trying must66, but you basically rewrote my character's motivation and personality. The extramarital affairs were completely off and made the letter completely wrong. Sorry you read my intentions wrong.


IC

The bar seemed crowded and I recognized quite a few people from the funeral. As I walked to the bar I froze as I swore I saw Robert, but when I blinked he was gone. I sat down and ordered a glass of red wine. I sat perched on the bar stool listening as friends shared memories of Robert. Some parts I had never known as they were before his illness. Others merely made me miss him more, the steadfast, caring, true friend, reliable, and hard working.

I did not see his parents at the wake, burying a child is the worst pain, but I felt it would be inappropriate to say condolensences, as they disliked me. They were old money and when I met them, all they saw was that I was over ten years younger and an unemployed artist.

My glass was gone before I knew it and his friends were buying me another, for toasting, and I was surprised how many knew of the special relationship Robert and I had. They all said he had died before his time, and it went on and on. I found myself staring at the engagement ring on my right hand.

 

[Steiner]

OOC:
Richard is Roberts brother, three years older and a career military officer in an Airborne outfit. It had always been expected that Richard was the one who would come to an untimely end, dangerous occupation, snowboarding and bungie jumping as hobbies, no provision for his future with everything he made spent on instant gratification.

When his brother was diagnosed, Richard was on an overseas detachment, and has been granted some leave to attend the funeral and come to terms with the loss. It's been a bit of a blow for him - his own sense of mortality has just hit him between the eyes, so he's pretty vulnerable. He knows that his parents disapprove of Intruigess (character name not given in plot), but has decided to make his own mind up.


IC:
Richard shifted slightly uncomfortably as he stood in the bar, another conversation gone dry that he eased himself out of, the truth was that he knew nothing of the people who had made up the bulk of his younger brothers last few years. His Class-A uniform jacket was a little uncomfortable in the cosy, packed, bar. In fact he felt distinctly out of place here, among the antiquarians, philosophers, librarians and curators who made up his brothers colleagues and friends.

Turning to the bar he signalled the bar tender for another whiskey, and leaned there, hearing the muttered conversations, the laughs as the crowd ebbed around him. Robert had been Richards younger brother, although they'd been mistaken for twins once they'd both hit their full growth. Despite his sedentary career Robert had always taken care of himself and the two brothers were physically very similar to look at. Book geek or not, Robert had played a mean game of volleyball, and the two of them were always competitive when shooting hoops.

Richard sighed, it had hit his parents quite badly, although they were trying to hide it from him. They'd emotionally prepared themselves to lose Richard, he'd spent his life jumping out of aircraft, riding in helicopters and being deployed to third world shitholes. Robert though had invested, he'd owned and run a business, he drove a sensible car and kept an eye on his cholesterol. Richard bungie jumped, and played full contact football with men a decade younger, for Godsakes... But today he'd buried his little brother, and suddenly there didn't seem to be such a thing as a sure bet anymore.

A flash of red caught his eye in his peripheral vision. And he turned his head. She was there, just as his mother had told him she would be. His parents had actually avoided the wake because they didn't want to meet her, and had asked him to stay away too, but Richard had wanted to meet this woman who'd been there for Robert when his own brother hadn't. He didn't know why - perhaps for a sense of closure that the funeral hadn't given him.

He stood and looked across the bar, for a second catching sight of the woman and getting eye contact. She looked shocked to see him, her face paling, and he wondered what Robert had told her about his Army brother that would worry her. Perhaps now wasn't the right time to talk, maybe she thought he'd make a scene, that he'd been prejudiced by his father? He sat back down at the bar again, and finished the whiskey - torn between leaving and asking for another one.

 

[intriguess]

Maurina

I swore I saw Robert, looking at me from across the bar, I went pale, clutched my glass and the uniform blurred as I blinked away tears. When I looked again, I noticed the similiarity in build as he had turned away. I asked one of Robert's freinds who he was and was startled to find out it was his older brother Richard.

I nearly dropped my glass as he filled me in on Richard's lifestyle as I commented on the uniform.

"There's not much to tell really, while they look alike they have lived very different lives. I'm surprised he is here, after all none of them bothered to visit when Robert was in treatment." I felt the bitter edge of his voice and I consouled him briefly before I excused myself and found myself walking over to Robert's only brother.

I began noticing differences immediately, until now I never thought about how the chemo had aged Robert, who was 38 and looked 48 when we met and had looked even worse near the end. I was glad he had wanted to be cremated, so that his friends could remember him at his best and not at his worst.

They had the same eyes, and right now I was looking into the saddest pair of eyes. I extended my hand, hoping it wasn't shaking like a leaf as I introduced myself, "Maurine McCormick," I pause wondering if he even knew about me. I knew Robert tried to keep in touch but it had grown less and less frequent when he was first diagnosed. "I was," what was I? His late brother's lover? Not exactly the best way to put it, technically I was the fiance, but who gets engaged when they know they are to die, but I had not wanted to go through the stress of a wedding. "living with your brother." It seemed the simplest way to say it.

 

[Steiner]

"Miss McCormick, I've heard of you, of course."

He clasped her hand in his own, automatically reigning in his handshake three or four notches, and felt the slight tremor that betrayed her nervousness. Deliberately pitching his voice slightly louder, so that it would carry slightly further, he continued;

"I missed out on the last three years of Roberts life, so I only know a little about you, but some people forget that I knew him quite well for the other 35..."

As if realising that he'd stepped over the line he grimaced apologetically and gestured to the stool next to her. "My apologies, beating up on bereaved women isn't usually my speed. Buy you a drink or something?"

Without missing a beat he turned his head and raised an eyebrow "That's an interesting dress to wear to a funeral, Miss McCormick. I bet Robert put you up to it, the last thing he'd want is to see you in black for him. That was something we talked about once, about ten or fifteen years ago..." Richard blinked a few times and steadied his voice "...I always said that no widow of mine would wear black, and I asked him to make sure of it for me. Of course, I never married..."

 

[intriguess]

Maurine McCormick

I took the proffered seat and realized he was still holding my hand. I withdrew it slowly and tried to offer a smile, "He never talked much about his youth. Always said something about focusing on the future." My hand shyly slide down the skirt, knowing it was quite the outfit. "Robert bought this for me when he started his last round of chemo, and asked me to wear it on our honeymoon or at his funeral whichever came first. I laughed about it then," I pause again, unsure what to say, "I was actually loathe to put it on, it was the first time I really had to face him being gone."

"He never got to see me wear it." I shrug and order another drink. "He said that while I looked stunning in black that he wanted me to stand out at his funeral so that he could spot me from miles away." I bit my lower lip, wondering why I was talking and talking. I wondered what he had heard about me and figured none of it would be good. I take a long drink and say, "I know Robert would want you to stay at the house while you are in town." I have no idea what made me say it, but I wanted to see him again, and not just at the reading of the will.

 

[Steiner]

I chuckled. "Well, you certainly do stand out, I'll tell you that".
God she looked so YOUNG, so allive. I could understand why my brother would want to drown himself in her vitality in his last years and months. I quickly stopped myself from staring.

Rolling the glass in my hand and watching the light reflect off the facets I spoke to her without looking up. "Robert was kind of important to me. It means a lot that you stayed with him, and it means a lot to me that you made him happy. I've heard the chit chat around here, and I know that you must have a kinda low opinion of his family. All I can say is that when you've spent a whole lifetime with someone, a year or two or five seems unimportant. I guess I never imagined losing him like this."

The truth was that I felt awful, I'd spent years being there for other people, it was my job description. I was the modern day knight who rode the shining steed to protect the weak from those who would opress them. And while I'd been off trying to prise apart two rival factions fighting over God knows what, my own brother had been killed by something that had eaten him away from inside.

Maurina looked a trifle uncomfortable and I realised that I'd let an uncomfortable silence build up.

"Miss McCormick, Maurina, I'd love to stay in my brothers house for awhile. If you don't mind talking about it, there are some things I need to know about the last few years."

 

[intriguess]

Maurina

I took a drink, glad that his voice was distinctly different from Robert's as he spoke. "I'll tell you what I can." I lean in a little bit, "It's getting late, perhaps we should talk about this in a more private setting? You could follow me to the house," I trailed off and told myself that he had not been checking me out. That I was kidding myself, I finished off my drink and nervously licked my lower lip. I wondered where I would put him, I had been sleeping in the guest room and the other bedrooms had been closed up for years.

 

[Steiner]

I checked my watch, surprised at how late it was getting. "I'm sorry, my body clock's still messed up from all the travelling."

Pushing the glass away from me I stood up, and turning to her, found myself momentarily mesmerised by the sight of her tongue as it ran along her full lower lip.

I'd always been impulsive, but the sudden rush of attraction I felt for this woman was something that my conscience was fighting against. It wasn't that we had similar tastes in women, Robert and I, it was more like he had better taste than I did. Quite often I found the women Robert dated extremely attractive, but couldn't say why exactly.

Making our way out to the parking lot allowed me to focus on the here and now a little. The cool air was a bracer, and suddenly I was stone cold sober.

 

[intriguess]

Maurina

I was going to offer to have him follow me, but then I realized he undoubtedly knew where the house was. "I haven't been sleeping all that well myself, plus I tend to be a night owl anyway." I weave my way through the cars finding the violet Saturn that Robert had helped me purchase.

"I'll see you at the house then?" I ask wondering if he would back away. I simple thought that after spending the last few years with Robert that the rest of my life seemed unimportant.

The drive relaxed me, allowed me to collect my thoughts. When my headlights swept the long driveway. I felt ready to face the house, the memories, and his brother. I parked my car and got out, smoothing my dress down before heading to the house. The porch light shining, comforting as I stood by the front door. It wasn't long until I saw his car pulling in and I unlocked the door.

The house welcomed me and I flicked on lights and dropped my purse on side table. I was debating pouring myself a drink, but decided I had already had enough. I rubbed the back of my neck, the hairs standing up as I felt him at the door. I opened it before he could knock looking more closely at his uniform.

I found myself wondering why he had never married. Was it the job, or the man, perhaps a combination of both. Certainly the man in uniform, especially him was a sexy image. I shook my head slightly, sexy? where had that come from?

I invited him in and asked "Do you want anything to drink, a cup of hot tea perhaps?"

 

[Steiner]

I stood in the driveway, looking up at my brothers house. I had a picture of this house, and its former owner, in happier times, and wondered if it was my imagination that it seemed somehow asleep, as if its anima had left it.

The porch light was on and also the hall light, I could see the light spilling through the small window next to the door. The last time I'd come here it'd been on two months leave and I half expected to hear the sound of music and laughter - Robert had been fond of informal gatherings of friends and family, any excuse to entertain. But the house was silent, the night broken by wind and the ticking sounds from the two cars, cooling on the drive.

I stepped up to the door, my shoes thumping loudly on the porch and lifted my hand to the door, but it swung open before I could make contact with the wood. I looked down at her, she was considering me with open frankness, and I wondered what she saw. I know I looked similar to Robert, but stood here under harsh artificial light I must look like something out of a recruiting poster. To break the image I took my cap off and stuck it under my arm.

"Thank you, Maurina, yes. I'd love some tea or coffee, if you have it. I haven't had anything but instant coffee in, seems like years."

In better light, she was still a little pale, and still bore the strange serenity of a woman who has borne a terrible loss but is coming to terms with it. I could only wish for that serenity, from driving up here I knew that my eyes were still confused and a little lost looking, despite the funeral this all seemed a little unreal to me.

I stepped into the house and unconsciously hung my cap on the bannister rail, running my hand over the back of my head as I did to settle my short hair into order. Looking round I couldn't decide if she'd been in the den or the more formal living room so, I turned to her and asked;

"Where do you want me?"

 

[intriguess]

Maurina

"Where do you want me?" the words had an odd ring to them and brought back a flood of playful memories of Robert asking the same thing, but meaning something far different. I felt my face grow flush and I look back at him.

"I've been eating in the kitchen of late," I shake my head. "Probably because Robert avoided the kitchen like a plague. Then again near the end nothing tasted good to him." I glanced at Richard noticing his full head of hair. "I don't drink coffee, but Robert convinced me to learn how to make a fine cup of coffee." I smile faintly at the image. I move around the kitchen collecting two mugs and starting up a small pot of coffee, and set up a tea pot for myself.

"I hope you don't mind caffeinated, Robert never acquired a taste for decaf, and it was one of the few things he would drink near the end." I bite my lower lip as I sat down at the small kitchen table. I notice how stiff you look in the uniform and I have this sudden urge to redress you and blush slightly at the thought of undressing him.

I take a deep breath, "You said you had some questions for me?"

 

[Steiner]

I followed her into the kitchen.
" Yeah, Rob could whip up all kinds of exotic party snacks and a cordon bleu dinner - but if he was cooking for himself he could barely manage a sandwich."

I sat at the kitchen table, and put my left hand palm downwards on it, feeling the rough grain of the wood and letting it take me back to my earlier visits. Her voice barely reached me through my reverie, but I snapped myself out of it to find her considering me frankly. Misunderstanding her appraisal I ran an index finger over the awards on the left side of my chest.

"Look impressive? Don't be fooled." My finger touched the Combat Riflemans badge "This one says I got all my paperwork in on time" my finger moved next to the Bronze Star for Valor "This ones for not taking too many sick days" my finger slid across to the purple heart "And this ones for helping the medics with their training"

I grinned at her and leaned back. "Actually, do you mind if I get a little more comfortable before I ask you any questions? I feel like I'm interviewing you - and it can't be any more comfortable for you. The last thing I want you to feel is that you're being drilled by the military machine."

Grilled. The word was supposed to be grilled. What was wrong with me?

 

[intriguess]

Maurina

"I actually wouldn't mind getting into some more comfortable myself." It sounded like a come on line and I fumbled with what to say next. I rub the back of my neck and try to figure out how to rephrase that. "I smell like smoke and I just want to get out of this dress." It still didn't sound better and I just looked at him and saw the pain.

I move closer and think of what he meant by drilled by a military machine. A shiver runs down my spine as I brush past him and simply say, "I think I'll just go change."

I enter the master bedroom where my clothing still was, and debate what I had that would be appropriate to wear. I didn't think my worn jeans that I wore when I worked would work. I slowly unzipped the dress and let it fall off my shoulders. I glanced in the mirror, I had never been one to wear fancy things. Robert had liked buying me such things. At least he had gotten me comfortable lingerie.

The red teddy hugged my body and held my large breasts in place. I chuckled at how fun it had been to shop for lingerie that fit. The matching lacey panties, no damn thongs, I didn't have the flat ass for it. The garter belt and pale stockings, if only Robert could see me now, he would never have given up life.

One tear rolled down my cheek as I unpinned my hair and kicked off the shoes. I headed to my closet and glanced over the assorted clothing there. I finally selected a pair of gray slacks and a charcoal gray tightly knit sweater.

I glanced in the mirror making sure that the bra didn't show through the sweater before padding down to the kitchen.

 

[Steiner]

I nodded as she slipped out the room past me, a brief press and brush of her body and she was gone, leaving a hint of fragrance in the air.

I slipped the uniform jacket off and hung it off the back of the chair, my arms and shoulders much freer with the weight off them like that. Stripping the tie from my neck I balled it up and wedged it into a pocket of the jacket behind me, undoing the top two buttons of my shirt. Finally the cuffs of the shirt were undone, letting my arms move more freely - finally relaxing I leaned back in the chair, stretched my arms over my head and arched my back, feeling the tension in my spine and shoulders, the tight joints popping.

As Maurina walked back in through the kitchen door I assessed the slightly dewy look to her eyes and decided she'd gotten a little tearful whilst she was away. She was dressed simply, but, elegantly. Everything she did today spoke of quiet dignity and grace.

 

[intriguess]

Maurine

The tea pot was whistling when I returned. I half smiled as I went to the stove, picking up the kettle and pouring the water into a mug with a tea bag in it. I look at the coffee pot, and see that it is done and pour him a cup, "How do you take your coffee?" I ask still standing, wondering if we would be more comfortble in the den.