The burden

[rgraham666]

of being a porn writer.

Bumped into an old gaming buddy of mine this morning.

He asked, "What are you doing these days?"

I said, "Writing porn."

His response was, "Why don't you write something useful."

Mine was, "Bite me."

Just thought you ought to know.

 

[sethp]

does that mean...

Does that mean that you get paid to write porn? How can I get a job like that? Please tell me!

 

[rgraham666]

Not yet, but I'm working on it.

 

[OhMissScarlett]

of being a porn writer.

Bumped into an old gaming buddy of mine this morning.

He asked, "What are you doing these days?"

I said, "Writing porn."

His response was, "Why don't you write something useful."

Mine was, "Bite me."

Just thought you ought to know.

Porn is the most useful thing I can think of. What's he want you to write, car repair manuals or something?

There's always going to be some asshat that wants you to write about kittes and bunnies and rainbows or the next Harry Potter or Chicken Soup book. Porn makes people happy too, but lots of people don't get that. Writing for pleasure is an alien concept to those who don't write.

 

[MagicaPractica]

Thanks, I laughed out loud at his response. Porn isn't useful? I think everyone who has ever enjoyed a story on Lit would contest that and he would have a very loud and angry mob telling him off. How is it useful? That depends on the person reading it.

 

[TriggerHippie]

of being a porn writer.

Bumped into an old gaming buddy of mine this morning.

He asked, "What are you doing these days?"

I said, "Writing porn."

His response was, "Why don't you write something useful."

Mine was, "Bite me."

Just thought you ought to know.

I like porn-ish writing. And writing porn.

And nifty porn writers, too ....

 

[TxRad]

I always considered it a boon to man and woman kind.....

Of course at my age most give me a funny look when I tell them what i write.... After they read some of it they give me another kind of look.....

 

[Guest]

of being a porn writer.

Bumped into an old gaming buddy of mine this morning.

He asked, "What are you doing these days?"

I said, "Writing porn."

His response was, "Why don't you write something useful."

Mine was, "Bite me."

Just thought you ought to know.

Well, I'd bite ya.

 

[rgraham666]

Well, I'd bite ya.

Any time.

He told me he's writing a history of the Middle East hoping to bring understanding to both the West and Islam.

I'm amazed I kept a straight face.

 

[Guest]

Any time.

He told me he's writing a history of the Middle East hoping to bring understanding to both the West and Islam.

I'm amazed I kept a straight face.

Awwww.

Isn't that sweet? He's hoping to bring understanding to the world.

Silly man.

That's what PORN writers do.

 

[CharleyH]

of being a porn writer.

Bumped into an old gaming buddy of mine this morning.

He asked, "What are you doing these days?"

I said, "Writing porn."

His response was, "Why don't you write something useful."

Mine was, "Bite me."

Just thought you ought to know.

Be proud Rob. I get it alot, but you know what? People could only wish they were doing what they wanted for a living - like you. BE PROUD!

 

[rgraham666]

Awwww.

Isn't that sweet? He's hoping to bring understanding to the world.

Silly man.

That's what PORN writers do.

Just so, sarahh. and a *bite* Fair's fair.

Charely, I'm doing what I'm good at and I enjoy it. who could ask for anything more?

 

[Guest]

Just so, sarahh. and a *bite* Fair's fair.

Charely, I'm doing what I'm good at and I enjoy it. who could ask for anything more?

Well, just music and rhythm.

 

[Liar]

Any time.

He told me he's writing a history of the Middle East hoping to bring understanding to both the West and Islam.

I'm amazed I kept a straight face.

Uh-huh. Unless he's a professor or diplomat or other kind of famous know-it-all, let's just see who gets published first, shall we?

 

[TriggerHippie]

He told me he's writing a history of the Middle East hoping to bring understanding to both the West and Islam.

Well, umm, tell him ... good luck with that!

 

[rgraham666]

Uh-huh. Unless he's a professor or diplomat or other kind of famous know-it-all, let's just see who gets published first, shall we?

He does have a doctorate. Or so he claims. He's got the snide attitude of one anyway.

 

[rgraham666]

Well, umm, tell him ... good luck with that!

I did.

I wasn't particularly honest about it though.

 

[Liar]

He does have a doctorate. Or so he claims. He's got the snide attitude of one anyway.

If a publisher is impressed by a doctorate, he needs to get laid more.

 

[TriggerHippie]

I did.

I wasn't particularly honest about it though.

That's my sweetness. Me of the, "Fuck you very much and have a nice day!"

If a publisher is impressed by a doctorate, he needs to get laid more.

So ... umm, I'm not a publisher, but I could call myself one ... wanna be published, bay-bee.

 

[MagicaPractica]

That's my sweetness. Me of the, "Fuck you very much and have a nice day!"


So ... umm, I'm not a publisher, but I could call myself one ... wanna be published, bay-bee.

I think you should start a "publishing couch" thread and see who takes you up on it. I would have done but didn't want to steal your idea.

 

[Rumple Foreskin]

Not yet, but I'm working on it.

Rob, you're being modest. Remember that big check you cashed for winning a Lit. writing contest? No doubt you invested in some gilt edged securities, or socked it away in an off-shore account, or, who knows, splurge and invested the whole thing in a double-hamburger.

Just for what it's worth, I never say I'm "porn" writer. Instead, I define myself as a writer of novels, short stories and articles. For me, writing is writing. There's a fine line, much discussed here at the AH, between porn, erotica, and hot steamy sex scenes in "mainstream" fiction.

I'll confess to blowing off steam by knocking out a pure smut piece, such as Xmas Xcess, which holds the unofficial record for most sex in a single story. However, I work on most of my submissions here every bit as hard as my novels or a story I may be planning on submitting to a high-tone literary mag.

Rumple Foreskin

 

[Guest]

Any time.

He told me he's writing a history of the Middle East hoping to bring understanding to both the West and Islam.

I'm amazed I kept a straight face.

tell him ta enter that under nonconsent

 

[TxRad]

tell him ta enter that under nonconsent

More like scifi, if ya ask me....

But then again no one ever does....

 

[elfin_odalisque]

After Rob -

Dan Brown bumped into an old friend.

"What'ya doing theses days, Dan?"

"Writing a novel about Jesus knocking up Mary Magdalene, with a Harvard professor, a French police chick, a self-mutilating albino monk and Leonardo da Vinci."

"Don't give up the day job, Dan, it'll never get published."

 

[Aurora Black]

Just for what it's worth, I never say I'm "porn" writer. Instead, I define myself as a writer of novels, short stories and articles. For me, writing is writing. There's a fine line, much discussed here at the AH, between porn, erotica, and hot steamy sex scenes in "mainstream" fiction.

I wholeheartedly agree.