The Big Book of "If" ...

[CrimsonMaiden]

Good to see I'm not the only one around here with a thing for Vin.

 

[Guest]

Mat, cloudy, and I were playing with this last night. I'm going to post a few questions from this book each day. Post your reply -- or just ponder it.

1. IF you could have returned the love of someone you rejected in the past, who would it be?
2. IF every time you had sex a big bell would chime somewhere in the world, where would you want it to be?
3. IF you had to name one thing ever said to you by a lover that you wish hadn't been, what would it be?
4. IF you were to name the person you most regret ever having kissed, who would get the prize?
5. IF you could hear the unedited fantasies of anyone you know, whose would you want to listen ton?

1. I wish I could remember her name!
2. The Vatican
3. Okay I'm ready.....put it in. (I already came!)
4. I wish I could remember her name!
5. Every woman I lust after

 

[Guest]

1. If you had the knowledge you now have, how would you put it to use if you could go back in time to High School?
2. If you had the ability to be invisible, what would you do with it?
3. If you had three wishes: what would they be?
4. If you could fire a previous boss of yours who would it be and why?
5. If you had one way to change the world what would you do?

Jmt

 

[Lovepotion69]

1. IF you could pick one current writer to write your biography, who would you pick?
   
   Marian Keyes. I'm really starting to like her casual and laid-back style of writing. Some chapters should be written by Tony Parsons.
   
2. IF you had to kill someone you know, who would it be, and how would you do it?
   Nobody at this stage in my life. Earlier I'd gladly killed my 4-6th grade teacher. What a bitch. She kept bullying students. Oh, and a classmate around the same time. Bully.
   
   
3. IF you could have a year any place in the world, all expenses paid, where would you go?
   Why would I stay at one place if all expenses are paid for??? I'd travel! Otherwise I'd like to go to Italy or back to London.
   
   
4. IF you had to sleep with two famous people simultaneously, who would you choose?
   Yikes! Too many to choose from! Eh, probably the same British actors as before. Adrian Lester from "Hustle" or Ioan Gruffudd ("Hornblower", "King Arthur").
   
5. IF you could commit one crime without being caught, what crime would you commit?
   Some kind of financial crime, as long as I end up rich!
   

 

[Lovepotion69]

1. If you had the knowledge you now have, how would you put it to use if you could go back in time to High School?
I'd be a lot more social and get to know my classmates better. Then try to keep in touch with them. I'd also try to get an extra job or something. And I would have studied my Spanish and German more... High School wasn't a big deal for me. Now, if I could go back to Uni though...

2. If you had the ability to be invisible, what would you do with it?
Walk into rooms to listen to what people REALLY say about me, and to go check out guys in locker rooms. LOL

3. If you had three wishes: what would they be?
Peace on earth, my health until I die and an unlimited number of wishes.


4. If you could fire a previous boss of yours who would it be and why?
Haven't had any really bad ones.


5. If you had one way to change the world what would you do?
Make it see it's own shame.

 

[scheherazade_79]

1. If you had the knowledge you now have, how would you put it to use if you could go back in time to High School?
I wouldn't have found the exam process so stressful, because I would have known most of the stuff already. Also I would have passed my driving test first time and spent more days and nights at the beach.
2. If you had the ability to be invisible, what would you do with it?
Eavesdrop.
3. If you had three wishes: what would they be?
a) That people who are cruel to animals get much tougher jail sentences.
b) That I could meet Ms Right.
c) That I could find my vocation.
4. If you could fire a previous boss of yours who would it be and why?
His name was Geraint. He made himself out to be such a cool, modern, open-minded guy, but when the chips were down it turned out he belonged more to the Dark Ages. He offered me a promotion a few months later, which would have meant several thousand extra each year. I'm afraid I told him to stick it up his arse.
5. If you had one way to change the world what would you do?
I'd become a politician - but there's way too much shit people could dig up on me to give me a particularly long career!

 

[Dar~]

1. If you had the knowledge you now have, how would you put it to use if you could go back in time to High School?I wouldn't care about being well liked and I wouldn't give so much importance to the taunts of others. I have realized since then that I Am fine the way I am and that I don't need everyone or anyone to like me. I just need to be myself
2. If you had the ability to be invisible, what would you do with it?I go around naked and learn to be comfortable in my own skin.
3. If you had three wishes: what would they be? TO pay off the debts of myself and aeveryone I truly know and love. to bring to end intolerance. To not get a period.
4. If you could fire a previous boss of yours who would it be and why?I had a boss who only hired mormons. he was a bishop at the LDS church in town. Out of desperation he hired me and then as soon as someone from is church became available, he fired me. I would love to fire him
5. If you had one way to change the world what would you do?I would unite all the nations under one flag. Not with hostility, but with peace and acceptance. that way nationalism would be at an end and every one would be us and no one would be them.


1. IF you could pick one current writer to write your biography, who would you pick?Wally Lamb. HE has a really keen ability to portray feminine emotions and feelings while still remaining true to reality. I enjoy his writing immensly.
2. IF you had to kill someone you know, who would it be, and how would you do it?I would kill my aunt b/c she has been in the hospital for cancer and is now there permenantly. she can't even breathe by herself. I would inject too much sedative into an IV. So she could go home peacefully.
3. IF you could have a year any place in the world, all expenses paid, where would you go?I would go to egypt.
4. F you had to sleep with two famous people simultaneously, who would you choose?K.D Lang and Johny Depp
5. IF you could commit one crime without being caught, what crime would you commit?I would park in handicap spaces everywhere they didn't have "mom and baby parking"

 

[TheEarl]

IF you could pick one current writer to write your biography, who would you pick?
I really wish I could say Douglas Adams, but he's not current anymore <sadness>. Then I'll choose Christopher Brookmyre.
IF you had to kill someone you know, who would it be, and how would you do it?
I wouldn't kill anyone. I couldn't.
IF you could have a year any place in the world, all expenses paid, where would you go?
New Zealand.
IF you had to sleep with two famous people simultaneously, who would you choose?
Jessica Alba and Kelly Brooke
http://www.8ung.at/yavin/scans/010_jessica_alba_tvspielfilm_yavin.jpg
http://www.freedesktopwallpapers.ru/celebs/images/kelly_brook2.jpg
IF you could commit one crime without being caught, what crime would you commit?
Again, I wouldn't. I'd download television episodes because I don't view that as a crime (because it's exactly the same as recording them from the television. Just requires less organisation), but on the whole, very law-abiding.

The Earl

 

[impressive]

Round 3:

1. IF you could pick one current writer to write your biography, who would you pick?
   Marge Piercy
   
2. IF you had to kill someone you know, who would it be, and how would you do it?
   D.L. (an evil sociopath who segregates children & terrorizes parents). Poison.
   
3. IF you could have a year any place in the world, all expenses paid, where would you go?
   Anywhere -- as long as it was with a certian someone.
   
4. IF you had to sleep with two famous people simultaneously, who would you choose?
   Celebrities really don't do much for me.
   
5. IF you could commit one crime without being caught, what crime would you commit?
   #2 above
   

 

[TheEarl]

[*]IF you had to sleep with two famous people simultaneously, who would you choose?
Celebrities really don't do much for me.

Not even my ones? Bloody hell, I'd have thought those two would have done things for a concrete bisexual nun.

The Earl

 

[impressive]

Not even my ones? Bloody hell, I'd have thought those two would have done things for a concrete bisexual nun.

The Earl

Oh, they're nice to look at ... but I can't really envision touching (or being touched by) them. I need a personal connection for true desire.

 

[SensualCealy]

Round 2:

1.IF you could make love one more time with someone from your past, who would you choose?

No one Id be interested in from my past, the now maybe but not past.

2.IF you could have a sensuous massage every day from someone famous, who would you choose?

I think his name is Jon Fennes or something like that, he is hot, then there is a hot blonde with blue eyes thats cool too but I dont know his hame either! lol

3.IF you had to name the most sensual part of your body, what would you pick?

Eyes, they are the only thing that isnt fat!

4.IF you could kiss -- but ONLY kiss -- one person you know anytime you wanted, who would it be?

Dean

5.IF you had to watch your lover or spouse have sex with someone else, but could determine who it would be, who would you choose?

Since this is IF and a big IF, Queen Latifa, I know he thinks she is hot!

 

[SensualCealy]

Round 3:

1.IF you could pick one current writer to write your biography, who would you pick?

Judy Blume- adult version!

2.IF you had to kill someone you know, who would it be, and how would you do it?

Aunt Mary, OMG there are so many ways!! I know Id have help too!

3.IF you could have a year any place in the world, all expenses paid, where would you go?

A weight loss spa anywhere reasonably warm but not HOT. With a pool.

4.IF you had to sleep with two famous people simultaneously, who would you choose?

Drew Barrymore, and the cute guy from Under the Tuscan Sun.

5.IF you could commit one crime without being caught, what crime would you commit?

Rob a bank, but that would be before I killed Aunt Mary, that way I could get away since no one said I wouldnt get away with that one! lol

 

[Salvor-Hardon]

IF you could pick one current writer to write your biography, who would you pick?

David Eddings

IF you had to kill someone you know, who would it be, and how would you do it?

My father, and a single sohot to the back of the head, unaware that it was coming

IF you could have a year any place in the world, all expenses paid, where would you go?

a full year in one place? Russia to work on my language skills

IF you had to sleep with two famous people simultaneously, who would you choose?

Famke Jensen and Cindy Crawford

IF you could commit one crime without being caught, what crime would you commit?

International transfer of funds heist. Several billion dollars now in my account instead of IBM's or Microsoft's.

 

[English Lady]

IF you could pick one current writer to write your biography, who would you pick? Oooh decisions,decisions, Terry Pratchett I think, he'd make it wonderfully humourous!


IF you had to kill someone you know, who would it be, and how would you do it?
Nope, I couldn't. Nope, unless you include the Crazy Frog, then blend him!!!

IF you could have a year any place in the world, all expenses paid, where would you go?
America, Ok so I know it's a damn big place, but exactly! Lots of plaaces to go, lots of litsters to meet!

IF you had to sleep with two famous people simultaneously, who would you choose?Well, it'd depend on my mood but either Ryan Giggs and Christiano Ronaldo or Nicholas Cage and Tom Cruise mmmmmmm

IF you could commit one crime without being caught, what crime would you commit? Well, I should say"I'd never thonk of such a thing" but erm, yeah. I'd embezzle enough money to buy a house in a nice area and a bitto keep the house in good order.

 

[blackhaus7]

Round 3:

1. IF you could pick one current writer to write your biography, who would you pick?
2. IF you had to kill someone you know, who would it be, and how would you do it?
3. IF you could have a year any place in the world, all expenses paid, where would you go?
4. IF you had to sleep with two famous people simultaneously, who would you choose?
5. IF you could commit one crime without being caught, what crime would you commit?

1. Dean Koontz
2. J.F. (convicted of murder and rape) by any means possible. There are some whose removal from humanity would be a good thing.
3. Tahiti (apparently with cloudy )
4. Cheryl Tiegs and Rachel Hunter
5. Liberate the contents of the Gold Depository at Fort Knox, Kentucky

 

[angelicminx]

Round 2:


IF you could make love one more time with someone from your past, who would you choose?

Aaron

IF you could have a sensuous massage every day from someone famous, who would you choose?

Vin Diesel

IF you had to name the most sensual part of your body, what would you pick?

My hands

IF you could kiss -- but ONLY kiss -- one person you know anytime you wanted, who would it be?

John

IF you had to watch your lover or spouse have sex with someone else, but could determine who it would be, who would you choose?

Someone he was attracted to/ fascinated with.




Round 3:


IF you could pick one current writer to write your biography, who would you pick?

Black Shanglan

IF you had to kill someone you know, who would it be, and how would you do it?

No names, for protection of course. Slowly… very, very slowly.

IF you could have a year any place in the world, all expenses paid, where would you go?

The Maldives.

IF you had to sleep with two famous people simultaneously, who would you choose?

Sandra Bullock and Vin Diesel. Or Vin Diesel and Trace Adkins. Or Trace Adkins and Julia Roberts. OMG I hate choosing!

IF you could commit one crime without being caught, what crime would you commit?

Hmm… I’d say the biggest bank robbery in history, but the guilt of stealing from my fellow man would get to me. Murder… but I would have to have a damned good reason. I know! I’d have to wait until the lottery was huge and then fix it so I would win.

 

[RebeccaLeah]

IF you could pick one current writer to write your biography, who would you pick?

Colly.....the sex would be fantastic and the characters would kick ass. Not to mention I'd be in another galaxy in another time....again.

IF you had to kill someone you know, who would it be, and how would you do it?

That I know?.....I haven't personally met anyone that awful.

IF you could have a year any place in the world, all expenses paid, where would you go?

Probably France, if that didn't teach me the language, nothing would.

IF you had to sleep with two famous people simultaneously, who would you choose?

Choices, choices, choices....no idea....

IF you could commit one crime without being caught, what crime would you commit?

Steal the US Constitution and make gay marriage legal and require the same legal treatment towards same sex couples as heterosexual couples...Shore up the support of Roe v. Wade too...Hell, maybe I'd just wipe out the current administration....

 

[impressive]

Big BUMP for Round 4:

1. If you were to define "kinky," how would you do it?
2. If you were to name the person you've made love with who was the biggest surprise (for better or for worse) in bed, who would you say it was?
3. If you had to be the mattress of one famous person, whose would you want to be?
4. If you were to confess the most embarrassing moment in your sexual history, what would it be?
5. If you had to recall the person who was the most difficult to face the morning after, who would it be?

 

[Salvor-Hardon]

Big BUMP for Round 4:

1. If you were to define "kinky," how would you do it?
2. If you were to name the person you've made love with who was the biggest surprise (for better or for worse) in bed, who would you say it was?
3. If you had to be the mattress of one famous person, whose would you want to be?
4. If you were to confess the most embarrassing moment in your sexual history, what would it be?
5. If you had to recall the person who was the most difficult to face the morning after, who would it be?

1) "Kinky is what other people are enjoying, and yet you are afraid to try"
2) My wife (surprise, she's more frigid than the arctic tundra)
3) Eva Longoria...... supposedly she has that sensual adventurous streak in her
4) "titty fucking" an ex-gf in teh back seat of my car while her sister and roommate were up front, and hoping I didn't make a mess anywhere too noticeable.
5) Never had a problem the morning after... its always been the day before that kills me.

 

[BlackShanglan]

If you were to define "kinky," how would you do it?

By demonstration.

If you were to name the person you've made love with who was the biggest surprise (for better or for worse) in bed, who would you say it was?

Ah, a gentlehorse never tells.

If you had to be the mattress of one famous person, whose would you want to be?

This seems an unenviable position whomever I choose, but I think I'll take Alexander Pope. If I can be turned into a mattress, I will assume that I can also travel through time to when he was alive.

If you were to confess the most embarrassing moment in your sexual history, what would it be?

Hmmm. Probably the time when a mother walked in unexpectedly. She was very polite, but it didn't help my composure that she did not, in fact, go away but rather hung about the door asking if there was any ribbon in the room. Where she thought we could possibly have been hiding it, under the circumstances, is anyone's guess.

(That's my third answer. So many to choose from, really.)

I'd prefer not to answer the last question on this list, so I shall substitute one from back in the distant haze of time when this thread was started:

IF every time you had sex a big bell would chime somewhere in the world, where would you want it to be?

St. Peter's Square.

Shanglan

 

[scheherazade_79]

Big BUMP for Round 4:

1. If you were to define "kinky," how would you do it?
2. If you were to name the person you've made love with who was the biggest surprise (for better or for worse) in bed, who would you say it was?
3. If you had to be the mattress of one famous person, whose would you want to be?
4. If you were to confess the most embarrassing moment in your sexual history, what would it be?
5. If you had to recall the person who was the most difficult to face the morning after, who would it be?

1. It's a fluid term that varies from person to person and from time to time. Anything that pushes your sexual boundaries.
2. Her name was Rachel. She was quite posh, always nagging me to be ladylike, then we'd get in the bedroom and she was an absolutely filthy fucking vixen.
3. Gandhi or Mother Theresa - I don't want to sleep on a mattress where loads of people have had sex, and I don't want to sleep on the mattress of someone with dubious morals.
4. Nothing springs to mind, and if it did I wouldn't tell.
5. No one. I'm don't ever get drunk and I'm very choosy with my sex partners. I live my life with no regrets.

 

[blackhaus7]

Big BUMP for Round 4:

1. If you were to define "kinky," how would you do it?
2. If you were to name the person you've made love with who was the biggest surprise (for better or for worse) in bed, who would you say it was?
3. If you had to be the mattress of one famous person, whose would you want to be?
4. If you were to confess the most embarrassing moment in your sexual history, what would it be?
5. If you had to recall the person who was the most difficult to face the morning after, who would it be?

1) Anything not the standard missionary position. I like kinky.
2)None. They all fully met expectations.
3)Sophia Loren
4)My/her brother walking in on us. There were several "hers" that happened with.
5)Her parents while staying at their house. Their daughter had been particularly vocal the night before.

 

[FallingToFly]

IF you could make love one more time with someone from your past, who would you choose? Do I have to have just one? Micah and Shaun. Together, seperately, I don't care. I just want to feel their skin and hands and lips and bodies against, within, along mine one more time. For like... eternity.
IF you could have a sensuous massage every day from someone famous, who would you choose? HA! Mikko Lindstrom. Lead guitarist for HIM. The man has the most amazing hands.
IF you had to name the most sensual part of your body, what would you pick? The curve from waist to hip. I love that part of my body, the texture of the skin, the way it looks, the way a man's eyes will linger theere if I'm lying on my side talking to him. It's one of the myriad reasons I maintain my exercise routine.
IF you could kiss -- but ONLY kiss -- one person you know anytime you wanted, who would it be? Pyxie.
IF you had to watch your lover or spouse have sex with someone else, but could determine who it would be, who would you choose? Please. As long as she or he isn't related to me and is clean, he can have anyone he wants. If I have to watch, I'll bring a notebook and jot down story ideas.

IF you could pick one current writer to write your biography, who would you pick? Jacqueline Carey
IF you had to kill someone you know, who would it be, and how would you do it? Don't ask, but I'd use something nasty, like finding a way to give them malignant, fast-spreading cancer.
IF you could have a year any place in the world, all expenses paid, where would you go? Right now, Vancouver Island, BC, Canada
IF you had to sleep with two famous people simultaneously, who would you choose? Ville Valo and Linde. Or Jonne Aaron and Linde.
IF you could commit one crime without being caught, what crime would you commit? Abduction over international lines.