The Author's Hangout Vending Machine

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ummm, smores please

I put in a improperly toasted marshmallow

and I throw it onto the coals where it belongs. blech!

do I need to teach you how to listen for it like the popcorn? :D

I carefully and gently place in a beautifully toasted marshmallow...
so you can mash it between some grahams with chocolate. lol
 
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and I throw it onto the coals where it belongs. blech!

do I need to teach you how to listen for it like the popcorn? :D

I carefully and gently place in a beautifully toasted marshmallow...
so you can mash it between some grahams with chocolate. lol

and the resulting piece, entitled "One Perfect S'Mores," finds a home in MoMA's permanent collection.

I put in a Nude Descending a Staircase...
 
and the resulting piece, entitled "One Perfect S'Mores," finds a home in MoMA's permanent collection.

I put in a Nude Descending a Staircase...

and the Demure Ladies Association comes along to tape up some fig leaves on it, for decency's sake, of course.

I put in the makings for a picnic down by the creek...
 
and the Demure Ladies Association comes along to tape up some fig leaves on it, for decency's sake, of course.

I put in the makings for a picnic down by the creek...

and a muddy dog wants a sandwich

I put in some dog breath, and a lick on the mouth
 
and the Demure Ladies Association comes along to tape up some fig leaves on it, for decency's sake, of course.

I put in the makings for a picnic down by the creek...

and you get no shortage of takers for a little Dejeuner sur l'Herbe.

I put in a glimpseof a dryad darting behind an oak tree...
 
and get assigned to clean-up duty instead.

I put in an escape route...

woohoo!

and you get a high speed chase, the cooties narrowly averted.

I put in a note of thanks along with a gift basket of things designed to put some weight on you... for Pete's sake! you're nothing but bones! ;)
 
woohoo!

and you get a high speed chase, the cooties narrowly averted.

I put in a note of thanks along with a gift basket of things designed to put some weight on you... for Pete's sake! you're nothing but bones! ;)

and the gift is well-appreciated.

But my AV is an inversion; I read bones, and so I like the idea of having the bones do the reading...

I put in another opportunity for a picnic...
 
and the gift is well-appreciated.

But my AV is an inversion; I read bones, and so I like the idea of having the bones do the reading...

I put in another opportunity for a picnic...

and you are given a more suitable location with a map from MapQuest... good luck finding it. ;)

I put in a call to the travel planner...
 
and you are given a more suitable location with a map from MapQuest... good luck finding it. ;)

I put in a call to the travel planner...

and you get a visit from the bone reading witch doctor

I put in a trip to the Kumbu Valley
 
and you get a visit from the bone reading witch doctor

I put in a trip to the Kumbu Valley

and MapQuest says you can't get there because there are no local roads in Wichita Falls.

I put in a real atlas...

It did once tell me I couldn't get to Clarksville, IL because there were no bridges or ferries. I searched for its problem, and found it was routing me from NY to IL via Barcelona and Majorca! lol
 
and MapQuest says you can't get there because there are no local roads in Wichita Falls.

I put in a real atlas...

It did once tell me I couldn't get to Clarksville, IL because there were no bridges or ferries. I searched for its problem, and found it was routing me from NY to IL via Barcelona and Majorca! lol

Lol, MapQuest is just awful

I put in navigation from a stick forming a North South line
 
I look at that and think you are trying to find a water source or something...

I put in my compass...

and you get confused trying to figure out the declination of a E x NE heading

I put in four fingers, held against the sky showing 2 hrs till sun down
 
and you get confused trying to figure out the declination of a E x NE heading

I put in four fingers, held against the sky showing 2 hrs till sun down

hey, neat trick! I didn't see that one before.

and you get a reply of: "Red sky at night, sailor's delight."

I put in a sailor hat...
 
hey, neat trick! I didn't see that one before.

and you get a reply of: "Red sky at night, sailor's delight."

I put in a sailor hat...

and you grip the headboard tight, as I try and lick, and talk like Popeye ak ak ak ak!

I put in a line of prayer flags, softly fluttering in the cool mountain breeze
 
and you grip the headboard tight, as I try and lick, and talk like Popeye ak ak ak ak!

I put in a line of prayer flags, softly fluttering in the cool mountain breeze

:eek:

you are bad! and I am not playing Olive Oyl! :p shithead

and you get a bag of trail mix for the walk back down the mountain.

I put in a bottle of spring water...
 
:eek:

you are bad! and I am not playing Olive Oyl! :p shithead

and you get a bag of trail mix for the walk back down the mountain.

I put in a bottle of spring water...

and the label cautions 'best before summer.'

I put in a mountain spring...
 
and it keeps poking me in the back

I put in a simple meal at a mountain tea house

and you think you could have made a better tasting meal on a camp stove and think that you will the next time.

I put in a bag of Reeses Pieces that I smuggled in my pocket....
 
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