The Author's Hangout Vending Machine

[YoursSINSerely]

and the machine turns nostalgic, filled with memories of warm summer nights and soft summer girls on the green meadows of the park

I put in a Ode to Summer Nights...

And, Greese starts to ooze out of every crack in the vending machine

I put in a very clever use of a lubricant.

 

[Handley_Page]

And, Greese starts to ooze out of every crack in the vending machine

I put in a very clever use of a lubricant.

Some of these cures for constipation are amazing.


I put in a bag of Senna Pods.

 

[Tio_Narratore]

Some of these cures for constipation are amazing.


I put in a bag of Senna Pods.

and the vault is quickly filled.

I put in a three-seater...

 

[YoursSINSerely]

and the vault is quickly filled.

I put in a three-seater...

and, Austin has created his masterpiece on the door complete with a crescent moon.

I put in a nice wicker basket full of freshly picked green leaves.

 

[Austin8]

and, Austin has created his masterpiece on the door complete with a crescent moon.

I put in a nice wicker basket full of freshly picked green leaves.

and the basket is placed inside the outhouse

I put in a pair of bib-overalls and steel toed shoes

 

[YoursSINSerely]

and the basket is placed inside the outhouse

I put in a pair of bib-overalls and steel toed shoes

and, the shoes are strong enough to support my weight as I reach way, way down inside that bib to find out what you brought home for me today.

I put in a Welcome Home sign.

 

[Tio_Narratore]

and, the shoes are strong enough to support my weight as I reach way, way down inside that bib to find out what you brought home for me today.

I put in a Welcome Home sign.

and you're met with open arms.

I put in a travelling salesman...

 

[YoursSINSerely]

and you're met with open arms.

I put in a travelling salesman...

And, you get a woman waiting in every town.

I put in a really big vacuum cleaner.

 

[Tio_Narratore]

And, you get a woman waiting in every town.

I put in a really big vacuum cleaner.

and it sucks up all the dirt in your flower garden.

I put in a dozen flats of varied annuals...

 

[Handley_Page]

and it sucks up all the dirt in your flower garden.

I put in a dozen flats of varied annuals...

All the Comics annuals from 1953-1984 are now displayed in their glory.


I put in a suitable bookcase

 

[Tio_Narratore]

All the Comics annuals from 1953-1984 are now displayed in their glory.


I put in a suitable bookcase

and the pants need alterations.

I put in a trip to Saville Row...

 

[kimbalee]

and the pants need alterations.

I put in a trip to Saville Row...

and you get a coupon for a free cut at the Barber's shop.

I put in a curious looking meat pie...

 

[Tio_Narratore]

and you get a coupon for a free cut at the Barber's shop.

I put in a curious looking meat pie...

and Mr. Todd says "try him! - you'll like him!"

I put in a dissecting microscope for bone fragment assessment...

 

[kimbalee]

and Mr. Todd says "try him! - you'll like him!"

I put in a dissecting microscope for bone fragment assessment...

and the theme song from the movie, "Holes," starts to play...

"diggin, diggin up bones, diggin

diggin, diggin up bones, diggin"

I put in a Wanted poster for "Kissin' Kate"

 

[Tio_Narratore]

and the theme song from the movie, "Holes," starts to play...

"diggin, diggin up bones, diggin

diggin, diggin up bones, diggin"

I put in a Wanted poster for "Kissin' Kate"

and Belle Star's daughter, Pearl, tries for the reward.

I put in "Queen of Heartache"...

 

[Handley_Page]

and Belle Star's daughter, Pearl, tries for the reward.

I put in "Queen of Heartache"...

floating of a Sea of Heartbreak


I put in a Oar.

 

[ms.read]

floating of a Sea of Heartbreak


I put in a Oar.

gets the canoe that only floats down shit's creek...without a paddle.

I put in the jadedness of the world...

 

[YoursSINSerely]

gets the canoe that only floats down shit's creek...without a paddle.

I put in the jadedness of the world...

and, we all get a tiny little carved elephant with his trunk pointing in that direction.

I put in a single mustard seed.

 

[Tio_Narratore]

and, we all get a tiny little carved elephant with his trunk pointing in that direction.

I put in a single mustard seed.

and you get mustard enough for all the franks in Fenway Park.

I put in a sigh for the Montreal Expos...

 

[YoursSINSerely]

and you get mustard enough for all the franks in Fenway Park.

I put in a sigh for the Montreal Expos...

and, it turns into cheers at the very next game.

I put in a 20 oz cup of beer.

 

[ms.read]

and, it turns into cheers at the very next game.

I put in a 20 oz cup of beer.

and you get tickets to the german beer oktoberfest and find out the secret ingredient that keeps people coming back for more!

I put in some sheets that my boobs leaked on...

 

[Tio_Narratore]

and you get tickets to the german beer oktoberfest and find out the secret ingredient that keeps people coming back for more!

I put in some sheets that my boobs leaked on...

and the vending machine notes that kids will do that to you.

I put in a hand-operated milk pump...

 

[YoursSINSerely]

and the vending machine notes that kids will do that to you.

I put in a hand-operated milk pump...

And, Bessie favors the relief.

I put in an antique porceline pitcher.

 

[Tio_Narratore]

And, Bessie favors the relief.

I put in an antique porceline pitcher.

and the Roadshow films east of the river.

I put in a two-car ferry...

 

[YoursSINSerely]

and the Roadshow films east of the river.

I put in a two-car ferry...

and, you get a safe landing on the shore next the mill.

I put in a pre-programmed GPS.