Submissive/Slave Haven

[intothewoods]

*bump*

I hate feeling emotionally raw.

 

[EmpressFi]

/hugs

 

[rida]

*bump*

I hate feeling emotionally raw.

{{{hugs }}}




-----------------
Up-date on Hubby's depression:
Something good came out from this (still on-going) heavy episode ... he has realized how bad it has been and for how long and is accepting that he needs help (YEY!). We have been having a lot of conversations and he is going to see a therapist next week. Now I am keeping my finger crossed that it will be a good match right away ... as the options are fairly limited ... and that any medication he might need will work out fast enough and with not too many side effects.

But it makes it so much easier to deal whit it, knowing that he is finally taking a step toward getting better

 

[ShyVixen]

-----------------
Up-date on Hubby's depression:
Something good came out from this (still on-going) heavy episode ... he has realized how bad it has been and for how long and is accepting that he needs help (YEY!). We have been having a lot of conversations and he is going to see a therapist next week. Now I am keeping my finger crossed that it will be a good match right away ... as the options are fairly limited ... and that any medication he might need will work out fast enough and with not too many side effects.

But it makes it so much easier to deal whit it, knowing that he is finally taking a step toward getting better

rida, that is wonderful news. I really hope it works out for your hubby *fingers crossed* I have a parent who suffers from depression so I understand the frustration at times.

--------------

I'm feeling emotionally stable and secure for the first time in a long time. I'm also beginning to believe I'm more submissive than I initially thought...

 

[TeachMeSir]

{{{hugs }}}




-----------------
Up-date on Hubby's depression:
Something good came out from this (still on-going) heavy episode ... he has realized how bad it has been and for how long and is accepting that he needs help (YEY!). We have been having a lot of conversations and he is going to see a therapist next week. Now I am keeping my finger crossed that it will be a good match right away ... as the options are fairly limited ... and that any medication he might need will work out fast enough and with not too many side effects.

But it makes it so much easier to deal whit it, knowing that he is finally taking a step toward getting better

Rida, I have suffered from depression on & off my whole life from when I was 8. It sometimes stems from anxiety and sometimes pure despression.

I hope things work out well for you & your husband. I will say that quite often I don't feel myself slip into my depression until it is too late to know that I am depressed. By then I lack ALL motivation and I tend to just wallow in my down state for a while. At some stage, with some trigger I seem to kick myself in the backside & take that first step to pulling myself out of it. Mind you, that first step is all I can face at that stage so there is no long term plan by myself to achieve emotional happiness or mental balance. But for some reason, just the fact that I took that first step shows me that I am not helpless, hopelss, or totally lacking motivation. It is kind of a buzz for me that I was able to take that first step. And this buzz leads to an increased motivation, a better acceptance of myself and so the upward path seems less daunting. The "timeline" for this is different each time for me and quite often it is a 2 steps froward & one step back forward momentum..

A word from my point of view, which I understand may not apply to your situation so please take it with a grain of salt. When I am getting well again I am very aware of peoples perception of my path to happiness. I can feel that the work I am doing "on myself" is not appreciated, and I will admit that this is generally due to my own chemical imbalance, not actions of another. Conversely, at times, I feel that I am being revered for my efforts. That I am truely appreciated, that that someone is happy to see me getting happy. Now, this should be a good thing right? Unfortuantely it maifests itself for me as a pressure or expectation & I despair that I will not be able to live up to their dreams for me. Once again, this is all "in my head" and it makes it difficult for those close to me to walk the line between apprectaing my efforts & not putting too my pressure (as I perceive it) on me to get well. I think this may be due to my motivation in life in general to make people around me happy, but not to my detriment whihc is possibly the catalyst. But if he is getting help, if you see signs that he is feeling either too much or not enough appreciation then perhaps you can keep this in mind as it applies to you.

End self-therapy session.

 

[intothewoods]

{{{hugs }}}




-----------------
Up-date on Hubby's depression:
Something good came out from this (still on-going) heavy episode ... he has realized how bad it has been and for how long and is accepting that he needs help (YEY!). We have been having a lot of conversations and he is going to see a therapist next week. Now I am keeping my finger crossed that it will be a good match right away ... as the options are fairly limited ... and that any medication he might need will work out fast enough and with not too many side effects.

But it makes it so much easier to deal whit it, knowing that he is finally taking a step toward getting better

Oh, great news, rida!

I'm feeling better today. I was just feeling oversensitive and prickly last night.

 

[ShyVixen]

I'm feeling better today. I was just feeling oversensitive and prickly last night.

(((((hugs)))))

Glad you are feeling better today, ITW

 

[rida]

Thank you ShyVixen & intothewoods.
Glad to hear things are better for you


Thank you TeachMeSir for your insight into your thought process when depressed. I'll keep them in mind. I think that it is really good that you are so aware of what is going on in your mind during the depressive spells and during the recovery period. I think being aware of it is very important for not letting depression take over and rule your life more than it is doing already.

In Hubby's case I believe is a combination of chemical imbalance (he suffers of SAD as well) and emotional triggers. I'm even aware of what those triggers are, and Hubby too. But the problem has been so far that, when he is depressed, he just find himself at the bottom of this dark pit and he cannot see anyway out and as such all he can do is keep his focus on little things (sudoku has been very helpful in that) to keep himself from drowning. Than suddenly something clicks and he feels better, and as such he becomes very confident and focused and does not feel the need to do anything for his depression anymore. It has been a roller-coaster of up and downs, although with more down than ups. He does not really fit the bill of manic depressive thou as the up parts are not really manic.
I've always made a point of being supportive and let him know that I love him no matter what. Sometime I get frustrated and just get mad at him, but I have always been very careful in not pushing or ignore him. That is why I have always been very cautious in bringing up therapy or medications (knowing his past experience with it).
But finally, he has started to see what I have been seeing all along. It only took about 15 years ....

 

[TeachMeSir]

.....

 

[Netzach]

Well, hindsight is 20-20..... Don't try telling me this when I'm spiraling out of control! It is true that I am more in tune with myself that I have ever been before. But unfortunately it is only as I am pulling myself kicking & screaming to the light that I have a sense of this.

I to suffer from SAD. It has been said by a professional that it is only a mild case. (Note to any professional: Do NOt Tell A Depressed Person That They Only Have a Mild Case. It Is Like A Slap In The Face, "Hey, Get Over It! Others Have It Worse". - talk about how to kick a girl when she's down!

I have endevoursed to live my life ever since in places where season changes aren't as extreme. And I take Vit B when it's been overcast out. When it was really bad & I was living in England through a dreary winter I even went to a sunbed... that seemed to help, although with my olive skin I looked silly surrounded by pasty white people!

I have had people tell me that it is a matter of will power. Of just "getting over it". That there is no chemical imbalance. While I appreciate the tough love that helps me kick myself in the perverbial ass sometimes, it angers me that they claim it is all in my control. A chemical imbalnce is a very real thing!!! Luckily I have found good meds (what works for some doesn't work for others so it's a case if trial & error).

In addition, I have started with a great new therapist. She doesn't lecture, she doesn;t over-sympathise or enable my negative thoughts, but nor does she tell me what I should do... It's hard to explain what it is I really like that she does. I only know how she's different by what she doesn't do. Currently we are working on "Cognitive Thought Processes" (Not sure whay it's called that given that Cognitive & Thought mean rounghly the same thing). Our aim is that I recognise unhelpful htoughts, while accepting that sadness and anger are valid feelings, other less helpful emotions are simply self-destructive. There emotions I have that I would like to hinder (please note that I said would like to, thsi is a huge step for me. If I had said "should" I would be almost admiting defeat before I started, if I sais "need to", then I am playing up to my perfectionism, untimately failing at that also & thus perpetuating the downward spiral).

Let me say this (a little bit of self-therapy). *stands up & addresses meeting* Hi. My name is TMS and I have destructive emotions. My main faults are Denial, I think "should", and All-or-none Thinking. I have been in therapy on & off for 24 years and have spent the last 4 weeks not desperately depressed (clean). Thank-you.

** and the crown goes wild. round of applause for TMS & shouts of "Welcome TMS"...**

Please note, that part of my recovery always includes a certain sense of "sillyness"!!!!

Thanks for listening.

Do you have a full spectrum light thing?

I don't know why they're so reluctant to prescribe the damn things.

 

[catalina_francisco]

I to suffer from SAD.

I can empathise as I suffer as well. I didn't realise it was an issue for me having spent my whole life in the sun, then I came to Europe and it hit like running into a brick wall at 200kph. At first it didn't register that was what it was, but then I thought about it and also one of F's sisters suggested it might be the problem. Since then I have taken notice of what happens each year and seems it is fairly spot on. Unfortunately, F has decided there is no such condition and as you say, I just need to get over it as it isn't real'. I suspect he knows it is real but in his dilemma of being male and feeling he has to fix it, this is his way of hoping dominance will cure all.

Currently we are working on "Cognitive Thought Processes" (Not sure whay it's called that given that Cognitive & Thought mean rounghly the same thing).

The reason the two words are used is because cognitive relates to conscious thought, so cognitive thought therapy is about making you think consciously about what you are thinking and why, and then addressing it by consciously bringing out the more positive and in part realistic thought processes instead of the negative and often subconscious and/or baseless ones.

Catalina

 

[TeachMeSir]

.....

 

[catalina_francisco]

Catalina, I am originally from Brisbane

Yay, another Queenslander and Brissie girl!! I miss the lifestyle and natural beauty, but I sure do not miss the humidity and heat combo.

Catalina

 

[SweetGigi]

So I set Carlos off on a plane this morning for Mexico City to visit his family for a few weeks before he comes back here and drives cross country to San Fransico. It was slightly bittersweet in the carrying him there and watching him walk away from me. But the whispers and tenderness he showed me while saying our goodbyes made it much more tolerable. He turned around three times to wave and blow me kisses and even texted me once I got back to the car to tell me he already missed my touch. *melt* He is so sensitive, so caring, but yet he is also so demanding and so sadistic as well. The perfect blend. Such a natural. *le sigh* I only wish I had known all this sooner.

Trips to SF are to come soon.

 

[rida]

So I set Carlos off on a plane this morning for Mexico City to visit his family for a few weeks before he comes back here and drives cross country to San Fransico. It was slightly bittersweet in the carrying him there and watching him walk away from me. But the whispers and tenderness he showed me while saying our goodbyes made it much more tolerable. He turned around three times to wave and blow me kisses and even texted me once I got back to the car to tell me he already missed my touch. *melt* He is so sensitive, so caring, but yet he is also so demanding and so sadistic as well. The perfect blend. Such a natural. *le sigh* I only wish I had known all this sooner.

Trips to SF are to come soon.

Dear Gigi .... {{{hugs}}}

Long Distance is hard but it can be done.
Hubby and I met, became friend exchanging s-mail while far from each other, met again and felt in love. But it took over one year before I could arrange to move in with him and we could live together. We were at the extremes of two different continents (not a week-end get together distance) and we communicated by s-mail (no e-mail or IM) and the rare phone call (time lag at all). It was hard, but it made our commitment stronger as it was not a step we took lightly.

I'm so happy for you that you found what you deserve.

 

[SubKekiLee]

So I set Carlos off on a plane this morning for Mexico City to visit his family for a few weeks before he comes back here and drives cross country to San Fransico. It was slightly bittersweet in the carrying him there and watching him walk away from me. But the whispers and tenderness he showed me while saying our goodbyes made it much more tolerable. He turned around three times to wave and blow me kisses and even texted me once I got back to the car to tell me he already missed my touch. *melt* He is so sensitive, so caring, but yet he is also so demanding and so sadistic as well. The perfect blend. Such a natural. *le sigh* I only wish I had known all this sooner.

Trips to SF are to come soon.

Gigi
As you know I set mine off on Friday back to his home on the east coast as well... It is well worth the time you have when you realize what a complete package you have... LDRS are hard work but rewarding... I am glad you found someone who completes you..

SKL

 

[SweetGigi]

Dear Gigi .... {{{hugs}}}

Long Distance is hard but it can be done.
Hubby and I met, became friend exchanging s-mail while far from each other, met again and felt in love. But it took over one year before I could arrange to move in with him and we could live together. We were at the extremes of two different continents (not a week-end get together distance) and we communicated by s-mail (no e-mail or IM) and the rare phone call (time lag at all). It was hard, but it made our commitment stronger as it was not a step we took lightly.

I'm so happy for you that you found what you deserve.

I was just talking to FF about this sorta thing yesterday. (what an amazing girl ehe?)

I once found a bundle of letters in my great grandmother's hope chest from her husband. I spend two months reading each one. Through reading them, I learned that the greater part of their courtship was spent in letters. They wrote each other for a period of three years while he was away at war. She kept every letter… and I later found he had done the same. Every single tattered, soiled, sometimes bloodstained letter was there match for match to hers in a foot locker in his bedroom. As I read them, even as a twelve year old I realized the significance of these letters. I knew, to my great grandparents, these letters stood for a love and a time where words had to be enough to keep you strong. Eventually I took the letters to their graves and buried them in between their bodies. I wanted them to know I knew… that I understood and wanted them to have these letters with them in eternity.

That is the type of love I want; one to withstand time and space. I want my great grandchildren to someday read letters marking my courtship with their great grandfather. I want even after years have passed to still write letters to him and for him to do the same. Mebbe it's a fairytale or wishful thinking… but I'm just a romantic like that. Its amazing this story can still bring tears to my eyes. It is one of my favourite memories.

Gigi
As you know I set mine off on Friday back to his home on the east coast as well... It is well worth the time you have when you realize what a complete package you have... LDRS are hard work but rewarding... I am glad you found someone who completes you..

SKL

It isn't so much that Carlos completes me, but that he supplements my life in a way that I've never known it could be. Its like going through life eating for sustenence, for the bare minimum of survival, all your life then suddenly realizing there is a additional 'something' that can help you not just live but thrive. I parallel it to walking through life in black and white for 29 years then stepping into a technicolour dream scape for the first time. Life just.... feels different. Fuller, more rich, enjoyable.

I'll never look back.

 

[rida]

I was just talking to FF about this sorta thing yesterday. (what an amazing girl ehe?)

I once found a bundle of letters in my great grandmother's hope chest from her husband. I spend two months reading each one. Through reading them, I learned that the greater part of their courtship was spent in letters. They wrote each other for a period of three years while he was away at war. She kept every letter… and I later found he had done the same. Every single tattered, soiled, sometimes bloodstained letter was there match for match to hers in a foot locker in his bedroom. As I read them, even as a twelve year old I realized the significance of these letters. I knew, to my great grandparents, these letters stood for a love and a time where words had to be enough to keep you strong. Eventually I took the letters to their graves and buried them in between their bodies. I wanted them to know I knew… that I understood and wanted them to have these letters with them in eternity.

That is the type of love I want; one to withstand time and space. I want my great grandchildren to someday read letters marking my courtship with their great grandfather. I want even after years have passed to still write letters to him and for him to do the same. Mebbe it's a fairytale or wishful thinking… but I'm just a romantic like that. Its amazing this story can still bring tears to my eyes. It is one of my favourite memories.



It isn't so much that Carlos completes me, but that he supplements my life in a way that I've never known it could be. Its like going through life eating for sustenence, for the bare minimum of survival, all your life then suddenly realizing there is a additional 'something' that can help you not just live but thrive. I parallel it to walking through life in black and white for 29 years then stepping into a technicolour dream scape for the first time. Life just.... feels different. Fuller, more rich, enjoyable.

I'll never look back.

Wonderful story ... I'm sure your great grandparents appreciate your gesture (now I have tears in my eyes as well .... )

(I have all his letters myself and he has all mine ... somewhere We don't write letters anymore, but we send e-mails and even IM each other ... makes it easier to talk about grown up stuff and kinky sex even when the rest of the family is around ... ),

As for your comment about not being completed by him but fuller with him ... I understand totally. I could not experience my life in full if he wasn't here with me. When I met him, when I got together with him, I knew I met the one I was meant to be with. I traveled across two continents and he traveled across one continent and one ocean, both at the right time.

Never forget the feelings you have now. They will help you when the rough patches comes, when life trows you curve balls. And when you overcome the hard times, it will only get better.

 

[SweetGigi]

Wonderful story ... I'm sure your great grandparents appreciate your gesture (now I have tears in my eyes as well .... )

(I have all his letters myself and he has all mine ... somewhere We don't write letters anymore, but we send e-mails and even IM each other ... makes it easier to talk about grown up stuff and kinky sex even when the rest of the family is around ... ),

As for your comment about not being completed by him but fuller with him ... I understand totally. I could not experience my life in full if he wasn't here with me. When I met him, when I got together with him, I knew I met the one I was meant to be with. I traveled across two continents and he traveled across one continent and one ocean, both at the right time.

Never forget the feelings you have now. They will help you when the rough patches comes, when life trows you curve balls. And when you overcome the hard times, it will only get better.

you are so wise, Rida. Thank you for all you say. *hugs*

 

[faeriefire]

I didn't know it was possible to enter subspace from one action, one word. And then it happened. Surprised me. Didn't realize it had occurred until I was jolted out a minute or two later. Threw me. Does that make me easily controlled, overly sensitive? Why has this trigger formed? Why is it so powerful? I'm still reeling a wee bit and kinda amazed...

 

[lilly85]

...........

 

[sexycaz22]

I once found a bundle of letters in my great grandmother's hope chest from her husband. I spend two months reading each one. Through reading them, I learned that the greater part of their courtship was spent in letters. They wrote each other for a period of three years while he was away at war. She kept every letter… and I later found he had done the same. Every single tattered, soiled, sometimes bloodstained letter was there match for match to hers in a foot locker in his bedroom. As I read them, even as a twelve year old I realized the significance of these letters. I knew, to my great grandparents, these letters stood for a love and a time where words had to be enough to keep you strong. Eventually I took the letters to their graves and buried them in between their bodies. I wanted them to know I knew… that I understood and wanted them to have these letters with them in eternity.

Wow.....reading this have made me feel emtional and teary, even leaving a sore throat! *smile* What a lovely and loving story, Gigi!

And congratulations on your new relationship, may it spend you all the happiness that you deserve. {{{hugs}}}

 

[petes478]

My Adoring, worshipping, sub girl

I was driving through some back roads in northern New Hampshire (USA) on a
cold winter's night. I stopped to help a woman I saw on the side of the
road in her car, and we had met earlier that day at an event at a client's
site, and so we recognized each other. She was older than I was and it turned out she was a teacher at an exclusive woman's private school nearby.

I was 25 and she was 42 or so. We stopped for dinner as she was
hungry and had been stranded for 2 hours. After we had dinner at a very
expensive restaurant and were walking back to the car, she confided to me that she had been thinking about this old boyfriend of hers and had been having naughty thoughts as we had eaten our dinner. I was somewhat surprised, but also a bit aroused. It was dark outside, and as we approached the car in one of those concrete parking lots with multiple floors, I realized we were completely alone. I told her, "gee, ma'am, I think we're alone here". She looked up at me and then turned to face the car, sticking her bottom out at me, as if she was presenting her bottom to me. I smacked it with my open hand, and it made a snapping noise against her skirt. I held her waist and spanked her again, this time, more forcefully. She began to protest, but then looked at me and smiled and said "Oh, Oh Sir-(she purred), Oh, Oh, Sir, I hoped you would spank me, like that!!". She pouted, and looked up at me. She said "I've needed and craved a Master who will dominate my every move and thought-Oh, Sir, your hand on my bottom belongs there!"

I was so hard at this point my thick long cock was pressing hard
against my jeans, but I didn't let myself give in. I admonished her and told
her that she had been a naughty, naughty, but very hot seductress. I
continued her spanking-thwack-thwack-thwack. I began to sense that she was becoming quite wet. When she was aroused, she grew more and more wet (wetter than most women I've been with). I could smell her tell-tale scent. This woman teacher's scent of arousal was compelling to me. I grinded against her bottom a little bit, but then continued her spanking. Her rear was getting redder and redder. It almost matched her face and neck which had grown quite crimson colored at her thought of being spanked in a semi-public space. Thwack-Thwack-Thwack-Thwack-Thwack-Thwack-Thwack-Thwack-Thwack.

Her bottom was on fire now. I slipped my fingers between her legs and felt
her very damp pussy and then lifted my fingers with her scent on them to my
mouth and sucked them. She tasted so musky and ready-she was a delight.

Then we got into the car and drove back to the hotel I was staying
at. We stopped for a martini in the hotel bar, but it was so crowded (it
was now about 12:30 or 1 AM). She looked ravishing at the bar, sipping her
martini-her nipples were protruding through her sheer black blouse.
Men and women were noticing how hot-looking she was. Our secret was that we both knew how turned on we both had been (and still were). Her red lipstick glistened in the light, and several folks "accidentally" bumped into
her, grazing her bountiful bosom, or knocking her ass a little bit as they
moved down the side of the bar. As we walked to the elevator and began the ride up to our suite, I couldn't help but kiss her and fondle her bottom.
Her breasts were warm and soft as they rubbed against my chest. As we
tumbled into our room, I closed the door behind me, and then placed her over a large overly furnished chair (the kind you always see in large hotels but
never sit in-they're just too large). I placed her in such a position that I could lift her skirt up above her waist exposing her bare bottom to me. She leaned into the chair and awaited my tender and/or sharp ministrations. She asked if she could suck me, but I explained that would come later; first she needed to be taught some firm lessons. I began spanking her again and she moaned in such a way I thought she might come right then.

Thwack-Thwack-Thwack-Thwack-Thwack-Thwack-Thwack-Thwack-Thwack-Thwack.

She then turned around to face me, face flush, and said "I need to have you
in my mouth". She stood me against the far wall, so I could see outside
the waiting area into the hotel lobby from our room (we were 12 stories
up). She took down my jeans a little and unleashed my cock and began moving her head up and down sucking me perfectly. She always placed one hand against my waist as if to hold me in place. With her other hand she began to play with herself. Her head bobbed up and down, up
and down, up and down, up and down as she serviced my hard rod. The
scent of my woman filled the room. Her head bobbed up and down milking my
thick hard cylinder. She whimpered a little and cried a little, as she
continued stroking my hardness and sucking me, sometimes rolling her tongue over the large mushroom shaped head, and sometimes sucking on one of my balls, then the other. She said she knew she needed to be punished. I exploded on her face and down her throat, but she didn't stop. She kept on sucking till I was back at full strength and then she stood up and pointed to her rear and said "put it in, at least just the mushroom shaped tip, penetrate me" and I obliged. She wet the tip with her mouth and then assumed the position as I slid it inside of her. She was so very tight at first, and then opened up. She said "punish me" and she moved her ass back towards my cock which was halfway inside of her ass. She moved back again and this time her ass took all of my 9 inches of cock. I began gently moving inside of her tight bottom hole. It hugged my cock tightly inside and the friction as I moved was unvelievably hot. She groaned and breathed in and out expansively. Her hot breath had been on my rod when she was blowing me, and I was now deep inside her freshly spanked bottom. She then said "I'm your cock-slut and piss-whore-Oh, Sir, Oh, Sir, please use me, Master" and I exploded again inside of her.

When we awoke the next morning, before we even got out
of bed, I ordered her to sit on my face, and face the hotel room wall.
Her flannel nightgown was bunched up around her and I instructed her to
take it off and toss it on the side of the bed. She placed her hands on the
bed posts and i ordered her to look straight ahead, as I licked and sucked
her clit, rolled it around between my teeth, gently and playfully biting
it, and rolling it, and licking it, lapping her pussy, eating her out, as she
moaned and shimmied. I held her legs apart and buried my tongue between her legs, she could feel my hot breath against her hot pussy and on her thighs. She ground her moist cunny up and down on my face, drenching me with her pre-cum juices. She was marking territory. My dried cum stains were still visible on her tits from the night before. Her skin was red hot, and was crimson in color as I ordered her to stare at the wall. My very erect member was standing at full attention as I licked and twirled her clit till she clenched her thigh muscles abruptly, clenching my face and tongue between her legs, her hips shook and bucked as she started a long drawn out orgasm, coming all over my tongue and my face, drenching me in her puddle. She reached behind and grasped at my animal cock, and stroked it feverishly, moving the shaft up and down, up and down, up and down, up and down, till I came uncontrollably, shooting hot cum. The first cumshot hit her eyebrows and chin, the second and third hit her nose and mouth, and the fourth and fifth hit her glasses and ear, then the sixth, seventh, and eighth sprayed warm white cum in her hair and on her tits again. She said "Oh, Sir, Oh, Sir, Oh, Sir-you are so large Sir-you have such Power over me, Sir-I worship your cock, Sir. I am your cock-worshipper-Oh, Sir! I am your piss-whore and your cock-slut.".

 

[Netzach]

That happened to me at my last networking brunch.

 

[rida]

I didn't know it was possible to enter subspace from one action, one word. And then it happened. Surprised me. Didn't realize it had occurred until I was jolted out a minute or two later. Threw me. Does that make me easily controlled, overly sensitive? Why has this trigger formed? Why is it so powerful? I'm still reeling a wee bit and kinda amazed...

I'm no expert but it seems to happen. Check out the below thread for some stories from other pyls

Instant subspace! Just add...

Met a Dom today who really pushed me to my limits, I've never had anyone just do things like he does. Never, after asking me if he could do something and I of course always saying yes, never did he hesitate to then do it. I was just pleasantly shocked at how it seemed to not matter this was our first meeting. Even when he asked me if he could do something it felt like a command. I am frightened yet so excited all at once. The weirdest thing for me was that I haven't even kissed him. Well, not on the lips. I'm so new to all of this...

He lives right up the street from me...never did I think I could find someone like him so close by!

I've been giddy all night. He already gave me orders on what I'm to do for our next meeting. Oh god what if I mess up?

Well first of all: congratulation on finding someone so close that pushed so many right buttons right away!
And a word of caution: be careful and be safe. Make sure that the frightening feeling is because it is all new and overwhelming and not because somewhere deep inside you do not feel safe.

Also take it slow. Chances are you are now experiencing the high of sub-frenzy. ( this is a good thread about it ). Make sure to talk things out and not take upon you more that you can really handle at the moment. Focus on the journey and not on the goal. You will also probably feel some sort of sub-drop in a couple of days (good info on the submissive/slave haven thread).

Good luck, be safe, and have fun