Sub needing help

[charleee]

I am a sub guy, who has a sub girlfriend, who is shy in bed. Other than this aspect, I am very happy though. I have found the best way to solve this problem, is to have a make believe mistress. As a result, I go round sex shops, trying to humiliate myself, use butt plugs, wear skimpy knickers, and generally think up tasks that would please this mistress.

The problem is, I am running out of ideas. Therefore, if people have other ideas that I should or could be going out (or staying in) and doing that would be much appreciated. Alternatively, if someone would rather tell me to do stuff, then that would also be cool. Would happilly disclose the results of my explolits.

 

[Cirrus]

Do this for me as your Mistress:

Talk to your girlfriend about this. Just because she's shy doesn't mean she wouldn't be into experimenting with it. Shy does not always equal sub, so unless she has told you this don't assume anything.

I'll expect this to be done during your next time together. If it's not, you will be punished.

Good lord I'd make a shitty Domme.

 

[areacode613]

Ditto and an idea

Cirrus is right, she may be much more help than you think, specialy if she knows it's good for you. Here is something that might work. Ask her to download stories of bdsm things she would like to have happen to you. She could emial them to you. Then you could act out the sub part, or perhaps you could take turns doing the downloads, and act them out together. Perhaps you could find an online dom to email instructions for both of you to carry out togrther. You know stuff like you mentioned, phot assignments, that kind of thing. I think that with the right approach you will find what works for the two of you, and with some efort it might just be the most exciting thing you have ever imagined. Hope that helps get the wheels turning anyway. Good luck!

 

[cellis]

Areacode what a great idea... find a dom/me for both of them....
and MzChrista or someone like her is just what they need.

 

[charleee]

Thanks for the advice. However, we have discussed whether each of us like to be sub or dom, and she also said sub. We have also discussed things like anal sex (for her and for me), pornography, etc etc, and she is generally disgusted by most of them.

As for being dominated by someone else, I can't see her taking to that at all, and feel she would be upset at the suggestion. Not sure how to go forward. Have tried tying her up, but she has never tried the vice versa... although I was hoping.

Charleee

PS Looking forward to my punishment!

 

[Cirrus]

Um...excuse me being so blunt and presumptuous, but maybe she's not the right girl for you? Sex isn't everything in a relationship, but for most of us it's an important part. With mutually great sex, a good relationship becomes better, but without mutually satisfying sex, a good relationship can fall apart despite other factors.

I know...I broke up with an otherwise perfect guy who was impotent but would not seek treatment for it. He treated me like a goddess and a lady, we communicated great otherwise, but that was the constant fight that kept coming up. He couldn't understand why I was so "hung up" with his (very treatable) "medical condition".

If you and your girl aren't on the same page sexually, it might cause problems. Then again, it might not...but it's been my experience that it usually does. Your results may vary.

You do sound pretty unfulfilled and frustrated. My guess is that will carry over to other parts of the relationship, if it hasn't already. If you just can't see eye to eye, and submitting is something you really want/need in a relationship, you're going to either have to find a middle ground, live with things as they are, or move on.