Strangest moments/things to happen during sex

[RomanSteel]

This one just lists the strange things that have happened to us during sex.
Please share, maybe you're not alone.

1. Passed out during orgasm. - Epic

2. Cat ruined my moment by jumping on the bed and deciding to stick her nose in my mans butt.
(Show stopper)

 

[trs]

This one just lists the strange things that have happened to us during sex.
Please share, maybe you're not alone.

1. Passed out during orgasm. - Epic

2. Cat ruined my moment by jumping on the bed and deciding to stick her nose in my mans butt.
(Show stopper)

similar here. Our dog snuck into the room and stuck his nose in my butt. Was so cold it deflated me in an instant. Funny now but was not then well was pretty funny then too.

 

[RAddams]

2. Cat ruined my moment by jumping on the bed and deciding to stick her nose in my mans butt.
(Show stopper)

Another pussy in the bed can't be that bad.

 

[AevaLynn]

I'm still laughing this happened last night. I was coming, had been a pretty wild night, loving his cock in my ass. As I was just loosing it, he suddenly does too and say " oh shit cumming in your ass" then "did I say that out loud?" have never had a laughing fit while coming or while there was a cock in my ass. I couldn't stop laughing for the longest time.Finally I asked him , wasn't cumming in my ass the point ? He was like, well ya, just not yet.

The dog nose in the butt has happened a few times here too, and makes me giggle when it's on him, and curse when it's on me...

 

[StrayKat]

2. Cat ruined my moment by jumping on the bed and deciding to stick her nose in my mans butt.
(Show stopper)

That happens in my house all the time, I have extremely curious cats who dont like to be left out.

Now that reminds me.
I had a goat and sheep farm when I was married first time. It was my job, being stay at home Mom, and my husband, a college professor, didnt care much to "dirty" his hands. So my animals were not in exactly friendly relationship with him.

Once I took my herd up to the woods for some fresh food and exercise and my ex decided to join me. One thing after another and we started making out, me leaning on a tree, him behind me, my goats grazing around.
In the middle of really hot fucking, my buck decided he didnt like me in too close contact with my husband, or something, and smashed right into his ass with his nasty pointed meter long horns.
Needless to say it killed the mood and left us both in bruises. I believe we were lucky not to end with some serious injuries.

 

[daddie]

http://s5.depic.me/00487/4aid4jnarqzv.jpg​

 

[GracefullyYours]

I was having some pretty hot video sex with an ex one time....I'd shut my eyes and was fingering myself with my vibe in my pussy....suffice it to say, I was very zoned out.

Meanwhile, the cat hand jumped up on the desk, unbeknownst to me, and was right in front of me, staring at my face. I opened my eyes to see the cat RIGHT THERE, which made me squeal a little and jump.

My BF had seen it coming and thought it was fucking hilarious....so of course he's doubled over laughing with his microphone on mute.

I'm sure other crazy stuff has happened....I'll have to think of some other instances.

 

[GracefullyYours]

Oh!!! One time, my then-boyfriend's dog ate a used condom out of the trash..... We were horrified and called the vet, who of course laughed and asked who it was better for - us or the dog.

 

[AevaLynn]

That's hilarious and frightening for the poor pup lol. We had the same thing happen with my mother in laws dog. He damn dog ate the entire contents on our waste basket, (unbeknownst to us) that had numerousl used condoms in it and then proceeded to crap them out all over the yard. We came home from a lovely dinner with his mother to a yard of brightly colored landmines.
We had just started dating and she was not amused at all !

Oh!!! One time, my then-boyfriend's dog ate a used condom out of the trash..... We were horrified and called the vet, who of course laughed and asked who it was better for - us or the dog.

 

[switchbitch]

a girlfriend of mine wanted to live out a fantasy of hers,she is a long-time friend and was well aware of my rather extreme proclivities and rather large circle of kinky friends so she asked me to organise a gang bang for her for her birthday.She particularly wanted to be taken by a pack of burly men in a woodland scene. So I lined up 15 big tough,beefy willing guyfriendsand we went down to a local national park. Since reluctance was part of her fantasy she was obviously enjoying being carted away into the woods over the shoulders of the guys. I on the other hand was enjoying the attentions of one of my particular fuck buddies in the back seat of the four wheel Drive. We were very involved in what we were doing when an unearthly scream from a man's throat shocked us to a stall. We dragged our clothes on quicklyto go and see what was wrong and if they needed help. More screams followed getting louder and louder from more than one throat and when we looked in the direction they had taken off in we saw the lot of them running towards the cars in various states of undress with my friend over their shoulders. One guy was in fact trying to run with his pants around his ankles doing the penguin shuffle faster than any one I have ever seen lol. When they made it to the cars I tried to get someone to tell me what was wrong and one of those big burly guys managed to get enough breath to say one word while shuddering
" leeches". I burst out laughing and there were many shocked and horrified looks at my reaction, apparently none of them had ever come across a leech before and they had them attached in all sorts of inconvenient places. I got out a packet of cigarettes and got the guys to lay down one at a time in the back of the truck on a blanket so I could touch the tails of the leecheswith a lit cigarette (it makes them let go and contract) once I had removed all that I could find I suggested we go down to the beach for a salt water swim in case there were any that I had missed. Fortunately after a nice swim at the beach they all relaxed enough to have a second attempt but this time at my place and not in the woods. And I got to enjoy my fuck buddy uninterrupted.

 

[AevaLynn]

You win hands down ! That is quite a mental picture , made me laugh so hard !

a girlfriend of mine wanted to live out a fantasy of hers,she is a long-time friend and was well aware of my rather extreme proclivities and rather large circle of kinky friends so she asked me to organise a gang bang for her for her birthday.She particularly wanted to be taken by a pack of burly men in a woodland scene. So I lined up 15 big tough,beefy willing guyfriendsand we went down to a local national park. Since reluctance was part of her fantasy she was obviously enjoying being carted away into the woods over the shoulders of the guys. I on the other hand was enjoying the attentions of one of my particular fuck buddies in the back seat of the four wheel Drive. We were very involved in what we were doing when an unearthly scream from a man's throat shocked us to a stall. We dragged our clothes on quicklyto go and see what was wrong and if they needed help. More screams followed getting louder and louder from more than one throat and when we looked in the direction they had taken off in we saw the lot of them running towards the cars in various states of undress with my friend over their shoulders. One guy was in fact trying to run with his pants around his ankles doing the penguin shuffle faster than any one I have ever seen lol. When they made it to the cars I tried to get someone to tell me what was wrong and one of those big burly guys managed to get enough breath to say one word while shuddering
" leeches". I burst out laughing and there were many shocked and horrified looks at my reaction, apparently none of them had ever come across a leech before and they had them attached in all sorts of inconvenient places. I got out a packet of cigarettes and got the guys to lay down one at a time in the back of the truck on a blanket so I could touch the tails of the leecheswith a lit cigarette (it makes them let go and contract) once I had removed all that I could find I suggested we go down to the beach for a salt water swim in case there were any that I had missed. Fortunately after a nice swim at the beach they all relaxed enough to have a second attempt but this time at my place and not in the woods. And I got to enjoy my fuck buddy uninterrupted.

 

[switchbitch]

You win hands down ! That is quite a mental picture , made me laugh so hard !

it was bloody funny! I know I shouldn't laugh at them but they were such big tough guys and they were screaming like little preteen girls

 

[Farrah]

My first serious boyfriend was also my first lover. One night when we had only been dating for a couple of months and were still in that wonderful stage where we couldn't keep our hands off of one another, we had gone Christmas shopping in a city about an hour away. Driving through the mountains on the way home, we decided to pull off at the top of a mountain, off of an old logging road for some greedy fucking. We stripped down and were smack-dab in the middle of doing the deed in the cab of his truck when a bright light suddenly lit up our naked bodies. A truck with 3 bear hunters had come up on us with their lights off without us realizing it. They were literally parked bumper to bumper with our vehicle. The assholes kept their spotlight on us while we hastily tugged our jackets on. Trying to pull the rest of our clothes on in that tight space would have only resulted in exposing even more of ourselves to them. They finally turned the spot light off as we backed up to drive around them. Our headlights picked up the three men hooting and hollering, with their bear dogs going nuts in the back. I was mortified and pissed. They had ruined a perfectly good truck fuck.

As the years have passed and I have become much more experienced in the arenas of sex, I have thought back to that moment many times. If I were to find myself in that situation today (and with my current boyfriend), I would continue riding his cock without missing a beat. I'm afraid I wasted my one good opportunity to be an exhibistionist.

 

[RAddams]

My first serious boyfriend was also my first lover. One night when we had only been dating for a couple of months and were still in that wonderful stage where we couldn't keep our hands off of one another, we had gone Christmas shopping in a city about an hour away. Driving through the mountains on the way home, we decided to pull off at the top of a mountain, off of an old logging road for some greedy fucking. We stripped down and were smack-dab in the middle of doing the deed in the cab of his truck when a bright light suddenly lit up our naked bodies. A truck with 3 bear hunters had come up on us with their lights off without us realizing it. They were literally parked bumper to bumper with our vehicle. The assholes kept their spotlight on us while we hastily tugged our jackets on. Trying to pull the rest of our clothes on in that tight space would have only resulted in exposing even more of ourselves to them. They finally turned the spot light off as we backed up to drive around them. Our headlights picked up the three men hooting and hollering, with their bear dogs going nuts in the back. I was mortified and pissed. They had ruined a perfectly good truck fuck.

As the years have passed and I have become much more experienced in the arenas of sex, I have thought back to that moment many times. If I were to find myself in that situation today (and with my current boyfriend), I would continue riding his cock without missing a beat. I'm afraid I wasted my one good opportunity to be an exhibistionist.

That is some seriously freaky Deliverance style creepy shit.

 

[Farrah]

That is some seriously freaky Deliverance style creepy shit.

Hear banjos? Paddle faster!

 

[RAddams]

Just don't get out of the truck!

 

[creamofthecrawp]

wow lots of funny stories here, i think i'm gonna keep my eye on this thread, and post a story of my own here or there.

I keep finding myself in odd situations.

One of the most awkward moments of my life was quite a few years ago, I was living with my grandparents and my girlfriend had come over, it was summer and there was a big glass room attached to the house. we had put down a couple blankets and proceeded to have our fun in the middle of the night with hushed voices but much vigor. After we had finished I looked up and my grandfather was on his scooter staring into the room and when he saw me he gave me a big grin and thumbs up. I couldn't help but laugh and my girlfriend asked me what was funny and i refused to tell her (couldn't have her knowing a 70+ year old man who couldn't walked had just witnessed us)

I still smile when i think about it lol

 

[RomanSteel]

before he was my exhusband/ husband even my old boyfriend and I were having to stay the night at each others place off and on. He took care of his grandparents and bed bound father.
Well, we'd gone out that night, came home and passed out on the floor in front of his fathers bed.
Later I wake up dazed feeling rocked back and forth. I thought "I'm imagining I'm having sex" and proceeded to pass back out. The next morning as I hurried to get up and go to work I had to PEEL myself off my bf. He initiated sex in his sleep! I look up straight into the face of his father who grins like the dirty old man he was (lord rest him) and promptly ran away to work.
Working a short day I tell my mother I'll go shopping with her. So here I am walking into walmart and my mother stops me. She starts peeling something off my neck and says "Damn, that's a hell of a sunburn you got going on, maybe you should get some sunscreen".. I was mortified. Little did she know she just pulled a dried cum puddle off my neck/back and I'd been walking around with it all day. *facepalm*

 

[Jackotheshadows]

1. Broke a bed with a girlfriend. Talk about scared, then hysterically funny!

2. Noted before, but dog jumping on bed during the big finale. Bad dog!

3. Drank a lot, and oddly. got picked up by a Hooter's waitress once. And I remember walking in the door with her, giggling and kissing. And then waking up with her wearing my pants, and me wearing nothing. Apparently there was lots of sex (according to my female roommate at the time), but I remember none of it.

*sigh*

 

[manyways4u]

I got quite a few that would fall into this group but one sticks out. Was having sex on a bed in a hotel with my gf at the time. The bed had one of those headboards that was posted to the wall. I was on top of her and headboard falls off. I stop stroking her and hold the headboard up so it won’t fall completely on us. She was having none of that and yells “NO DON"T STOP". She grabs my waist and starts thrusting her hips into me. So here I am holding up this damn headboard while she's determined to finish. Once she's done we get a good laugh about this until a few days later the hotel calls about the damage to the headboard.

 

[jayruth]

Ever so slightly taboo; on university holidays I visited my girlfriend (of the time) at her and her parents house. We'd been drinking all night and I'm extra naughty and bring some coke with me.

We go to her room (I'm alowed to stay over). We take some lines, I get off on taking some on her tummy. One of our "things" is to masterbate and talk dirty to each other. We're doing this when we hear her parents fucking. Drunk and high she says it turns her on. I say "what does" and she says she loves the idea of me fucking her Mum.

We are turned on, naked, but slow fucking and talking dirty. Her parents stop fucking (the noise lowers anyway). We continue. She's masterbating on her back as I slide in her, she looks over me, freezes then continues. Her Dad is watching us via a half open door, she mYakes eye contact (her words), grinds deeper on me urging to "fuck me Daddy". He left soon after (hard as she told me). This experience turned me and her on so much. I shared it with my wife and it turns her on too. Getting "kinky caught" or interrupted can be amazing.

 

[RAddams]

Ever so slightly taboo; on university holidays I visited my girlfriend (of the time) at her and her parents house. We'd been drinking all night and I'm extra naughty and bring some coke with me.

We go to her room (I'm alowed to stay over). We take some lines, I get off on taking some on her tummy. One of our "things" is to masterbate and talk dirty to each other. We're doing this when we hear her parents fucking. Drunk and high she says it turns her on. I say "what does" and she says she loves the idea of me fucking her Mum.

We are turned on, naked, but slow fucking and talking dirty. Her parents stop fucking (the noise lowers anyway). We continue. She's masterbating on her back as I slide in her, she looks over me, freezes then continues. Her Dad is watching us via a half open door, she mYakes eye contact (her words), grinds deeper on me urging to "fuck me Daddy". He left soon after (hard as she told me). This experience turned me and her on so much. I shared it with my wife and it turns her on too. Getting "kinky caught" or interrupted can be amazing.

I prefer Pepsi because the higher sugar content makes it taste better.

 

[Farrah]

I prefer Pepsi because the higher sugar content makes it taste better.

I just snorted soda up my nose reading this reply. It was Cheerwine, not Pepsi, but still!

 

[RAddams]

I just snorted soda up my nose reading this reply. It was Cheerwine, not Pepsi, but still!

I'm glad you got a good buzz from it.

 

[Farrah]

I'm glad you got a good buzz from it.

Quick question for you...I just checked out your wife's thread. Do you really get to go to bed with that every night? If so, why are you still up?