STDs in Erotica - Yes or No?

[LonRivers]

OK, I have read quite a lot of erotica on LIT, and have noticed that there very rarely is any mention of people worrying about AIDS or any other sexually transmitted disease.

In my stories, I tend to avoid those as if they don't exist. It provides a freedom to write whatever and have my characters not have to worry about dying from some god awful disease.

Am I the only one who does this?

 

[Bramblethorn]

OK, I have read quite a lot of erotica on LIT, and have noticed that there very rarely is any mention of people worrying about AIDS or any other sexually transmitted disease.

In my stories, I tend to avoid those as if they don't exist. It provides a freedom to write whatever and have my characters not have to worry about dying from some god awful disease.

Am I the only one who does this?

I think you just answered your own question there.

Some authors like to write stories in a world where STIs/unwanted pregnancy/etc. aren't a concern. Some do acknowledge these risks. As with so many things, it's an individual choice; some enjoy escapism, some find realism more relatable and hence more enjoyable.

 

[LonRivers]

I think you just answered your own question there.

Some authors like to write stories in a world where STIs/unwanted pregnancy/etc. aren't a concern. Some do acknowledge these risks. As with so many things, it's an individual choice; some enjoy escapism, some find realism more relatable and hence more enjoyable.

I got that impression myself, but thought to ask and see what others think on the matter. It's much easier to write a good story where characters can have random sex and not have to worry about what they may catch.

 

[Bramblethorn]

I got that impression myself, but thought to ask and see what others think on the matter. It's much easier to write a good story where characters can have random sex and not have to worry about what they may catch.

But some readers will read that and worry about what they can catch. I suspect this is partly a generational thing; for some of those who grew up in the 1980s when HIV was a death sentence, it can be hard to switch off safe-sex considerations.

Depending on the story, safe sex can also be an opportunity to explore characters/relationships. "Let's get tested so we don't have to keep using latex with one another" can be a big moment in a relationship!

 

[Five_Inch_Heels]

Some authors like to write stories in a world where STIs/unwanted pregnancy/etc. aren't a concern.

You called?

 

[Lifestyle66]

I got that impression myself, but thought to ask and see what others think on the matter. It's much easier to write a good story where characters can have random sex and not have to worry about what they may catch.

I write Loving Wives stories, and the 1-bombers often criticize the fun, sharing couple will die of STDs or the wife will get pregnant. So, I usually make it clear in the story that the husband had a vasectomy, and the wife had a hysterectomy or is post menopause, so pregnancy is impossible. And I address the STD issue by saying they're selective and remain with a small group of safe couples, or in some way handle the STD threat with condoms or tests.

But that doesn't stop the complainers, and some will still comment that they're going to die from STDs.

I've learned that there are some readers and even some authors on this AH forum who "speed read" or "skim" stories. And they miss the details, merely to post their complaints based on their partial reading of your stories. So, don't worry too much about those details. You can't fix stupid.

 

[XerXesXu]

It's interesting how the ebb and flow of pandemic STI's have influenced cultural views towards sexual practices over the millennia. Currently, were passing through a 'happy-time'. Enjoy.

 

[joy_of_cooking]

I try to incorporate STIs in a realistic way. So far, I have

• a series where it never comes up because MMC and FMC are a married couple trying to conceive
• a lot of stories where it never comes up because all the sex happens off-screen or via lower-risk activities (yay for fetish!). E.g., I think it's pretty realistic for people not to bother with dental dams for cunnilingus.
• a few stories where it's mentioned briefly for characterization purposes (to show the MMC is inexperienced and unprepared, or an FMC is worried about being raped, or to show how much the MMC trusts the FMC)

I am of the generation where AIDS was a big deal. The Kids These Days blow my mind. Especially the gay guys. Remember that photo of the SF choir? I cannot unsee that, but there are guys now who are like, nah, I'm on PrEP, chill, dude. It's absolutely wild. (Now get off my lawn, etc.)

 

[Voboy]

I have a few loathsome characters.

Sometimes, other characters mention they think those loathsome characters have STDs.

It adds to the atmosphere.

 

[LonRivers]

I write Loving Wives stories, and the 1-bombers often criticize the fun, sharing couple will die of STDs or the wife will get pregnant. So, I usually make it clear in the story that the husband had a vasectomy, and the wife had a hysterectomy or is post menopause, so pregnancy is impossible. And I address the STD issue by saying they're selective and remain with a small group of safe couples, or in some way handle the STD threat with condoms or tests.

But that doesn't stop the complainers, and some will still comment that they're going to die from STDs.

I've learned that there are some readers and even some authors on this AH forum who "speed read" or "skim" stories. And they miss the details, merely to post their complaints based on their partial reading of your stories. So, don't worry too much about those details. You can't fix stupid.

I find it annoying when readers are highly critical over details such as this. Just read and enjoy, and escape for however long it takes you to get through the story. Writing for me is an escape. The less reality I put into writing a story the better.

It's erotic fiction. If I want to eliminate certain things from my stories, then I will. If my characters all have huge dicks, then so be it. If the women are all gorgeous with large breasts and sexy bodies, then so be it. It's fantasy. Fiction. And it's an escape. Enjoy.

 

[LonRivers]

I try to incorporate STIs in a realistic way. So far, I have

• a series where it never comes up because MMC and FMC are a married couple trying to conceive
• a lot of stories where it never comes up because all the sex happens off-screen or via lower-risk activities (yay for fetish!). E.g., I think it's pretty realistic for people not to bother with dental dams for cunnilingus.
• a few stories where it's mentioned briefly for characterization purposes (to show the MMC is inexperienced and unprepared, or an FMC is worried about being raped, or to show how much the MMC trusts the FMC)

I am of the generation where AIDS was a big deal. The Kids These Days blow my mind. Especially the gay guys. Remember that photo of the SF choir? I cannot unsee that, but there are guys now who are like, nah, I'm on PrEP, chill, dude. It's absolutely wild. (Now get off my lawn, etc.)

It's funny how they think being on a medication seems to keep them safe from something like AIDS. HIV, AIDS, VD and all those things aren't going away anytime soon.

I have a dear friend that I love very much tell me that her ex died of AIDS years ago, and had been living with it since the 80's. She had been with this man for years and had a child with this man. She still thinks that she never got HIV or AIDS because she was faithful to him. I've tried to explain it to her that, that isn't how those diseases work, but she won't listen to me on the subject. I've taught Bloodborne Pathogens, CPR, First Aid and AED for years. I know what that shit can do.

 

[MyBareTorso]

My stories are more in the escapist field, so no STDs, condoms, unwanted pregnancies etc for me at this stage. Some readers here want gritty realism, others want hassle-free sex in their stories...you can't please everyone. I just write what works for me.

 

[TarnishedPenny]

This is a fantasy site. Men are charming, have suitably large willies and never suffer from PE. Women are all large-breasted and polyorgasmic. Risks of STD and pregnancy are infinitesimal.

As somebody wiser than I noted, ‘If I could get turned on by fat, wrinkly, old people having sex, I’d put a mirror by my bed’.

In other words, don’t worry about it.

 

[Rob_Royale]

Nope. None of that "real life" shit in my stories.

 

[Kumquatqueen]

I'm a child of the AIDS generation, not to mention intense fear of unwanted pregnancy, so condoms feature in many of my stories, at least in passing. And a WIP has a protagonist with HIV.

Yes, my stories tend to the more realistic end of filth. There's been guys with non-large cocks, too.

 

[PennameWombat]

It all depends.

In one story, set in the mid 1980s, two women are having a heated argument. As one turns to walk away, with a dismissive statement that she's going to go seduce some guys and that guys would barf at the thought of having sex with the other, the second one shouts "Your rotten cunt will give them all VD!"

In another, an older woman who's about to fuck an 18 year old male virgin, says to him "I'm clean and safe. You're so clean, you sparkle." This just after she's asked him if he wants his first climax in her mouth or pussy. He chooses the latter.

Some stories include use of or at least discussion of condoms. And, occasionally, mention of various other types of birth control.

In other stories, no mention and seemingly no worries about any of these. It depends on the setting and the 'feel' I want.

 

[MrHereWriting]

Doesn't work for me.

 

[ShelbyDawn57]

Depends more on whether it gets in the way of telling the story. Most people are aware of these issues so I don’t feel it necessary to include a safety lecture in my stories. If you can write applying a condom or taking an enema in a way that compels the reader and propels the story then go for it.

I have a blanket disclaimer in my profile. That’s enough for me.

 

[joy_of_cooking]

It's funny how they think being on a medication seems to keep them safe from something like AIDS.

Well, to be fair, PrEP does reduce the chances of HIV infection from sex by 99%, per the CDC. That's comparable to a condom.

It's everything else you've got to worry about, that they apparently don't. There are some scary multi-resistant gonorrhoea strains running around now, for example.

 

[SimonDoom]

Am I the only one who does this?

You are definitely not alone. I prefer not to deal with the issue of STDs in erotic stories because I don't think it's erotic. But, on the other hand, if characters push the boundaries of safe/unsafe sex practices too much and you portray them as being completely unconcerned, you run the risk of losing readers on plausibility. It's something I think about when I write, but I usually choose to write sex without condoms and other prophylactic devices because I don't find them sexy.

 

[LonRivers]

Well, to be fair, PrEP does reduce the chances of HIV infection from sex by 99%, per the CDC. That's comparable to a condom.

It's everything else you've got to worry about, that they apparently don't. There are some scary multi-resistant gonorrhoea strains running around now, for example.

I have zero faith in humanity to do the right thing. Take the COVID-19 pandemic for example. People were ignoring the safety warnings and guidelines because they didn't want to do what needed to be done or they didn't believe what they were being told, and still don't. People dropped like flies across the world.

I was knee deep in the shit for my job. I had to escort the sick to and from the nurses station at work as they showed up or came down for testing. I wore my PPE and washed up constantly. I went through masks, gloves and sanitizer like it was nothing. I still keep my car stocked with masks and sanitizer. I never once caught Covid. Everyone around me caught it multiple times, or at least claimed they did just to get out of work.

 

[CherryCupcake]

It depends on how serious the story is and the time, you set it. But as a general rule no. I can make putting a condom on a man sexy, but it's a skill and I find fluids very appealing.

 

[Bramblethorn]

I am of the generation where AIDS was a big deal. The Kids These Days blow my mind. Especially the gay guys. Remember that photo of the SF choir? I cannot unsee that, but there are guys now who are like, nah, I'm on PrEP, chill, dude. It's absolutely wild. (Now get off my lawn, etc.)

It's funny how they think being on a medication seems to keep them safe from something like AIDS.

Not sure what's funny about it?

Keeping people safe from AIDS is exactly what PrEP is prescribed for, and for that purpose it's extremely effective. Numbers vary depending on which studies you're looking at, but in general it's more effective than condoms for preventing HIV infection. It reduces HIV risk by about 99% when taken as prescribed (vs. about 90% for male condoms); in the real world those numbers are lower, but it's still pretty good. It's also something that can be used by the receptive partner without relying on their partner's cooperation in the heat of the moment, which is sometimes very important.

As a child of the 80s, I grew up with the message that physical barriers were the only worthwhile protection against HIV, and my instincts still find barriers more comforting than medication. But that's my hangup, not scientific reality.

I wouldn't recommend anybody stop using barrier methods, because PrEP does nothing to prevent against other STIs. Although some of those are now vaccine-preventable, some can be partially or wholly mitigated by various medications, there's still enough unpleasantness out there that I wouldn't want to take unnecessary chances.

But people shouldn't be mocked for thinking PrEP protects against HIV; they're correct to think that. It doesn't offer perfect protection but it's about as close as one can hope for in this world.

HIV, AIDS, VD and all those things aren't going away anytime soon.

"VD" is a catch-all term, not a specific pathogen. There are many different STIs worth considering, and some will undoubtedly be with us for a long time, but medicine has been making great progress on some fronts - Gardasil has been a huge success in combating the most dangerous strains of HPV and looks set to virtually eradicate these in Australia by around 2035. HIV isn't currently curable but with access to medication it no longer has to be a death sentence.

I'm the last to suggest people should take STIs lightly, but it's not helpful to ignore the ways the picture has changed since the 1980s.

I have a dear friend that I love very much tell me that her ex died of AIDS years ago, and had been living with it since the 80's. She had been with this man for years and had a child with this man. She still thinks that she never got HIV or AIDS because she was faithful to him. I've tried to explain it to her that, that isn't how those diseases work, but she won't listen to me on the subject. I've taught Bloodborne Pathogens, CPR, First Aid and AED for years. I know what that shit can do.

She's obviously wrong about how HIV risk works, and she really ought to get tested. But it's also possible she never got it; for a HIV-discordant opposite-sex couple, annual risk of transmitting infection is something like 2%-20% per year (numbers vary greatly depending on sources), which is not something I'd care to gamble with, but it's also far from certainty. If she and her kid are still healthy years after the relationship, that's a hopeful sign.

 

[MrPixel]

I touch on the real-world issues from time to time.

One series had a subplot where a character had a medication abortion that went bad, nearly killing her (hæmmorage due to fetal tissue ejection tearing uterine lining). Upon recovery, she and her lover used condoms until her periods stabilized and her birth control regimen (The Pill) could be resumed. In another, a sex club for women to prey on guys ("Los Bolas Azules") required monthly doctor reports, both genders. In another with a bar orgy scene, the party was about the men all submitting their "cleared" testing paperwork for the (known cleared) women, with the footnote that one of the "regulars" was uninvited because of a positive test for chlamydia. He would be welcomed to return on verification of negative status.

In most of my stories about polyamorous "families" - a/k/a "polycules" - most of the women are sterile, either due to hysterectomies or elective tubal ligation, or have IUDs. In one tale, a FC is on Depo-Provera, an effective treatment but with a side-effect of suppressing libido.

I usually don't address the STI risk; sort of don't want the negative vibe in what are mostly rom-coms. However, I have softly touched on anal intercourse as "dangerous" (HIV, E.coli and friends), and the MMCs are clan patriarchs who discourage the practice and deal with pushback for their "no anal!" rules.

Funny... nobody has mentioned HSV-II, the gift that keeps on giving; there is no cure at this point. HSV was the buzzkill in the 1980s among heterosexuals until HIV took the spotlight - HSV didn't kill people. However, mRNA technology developed for CoVID may be closing in on a cure for HSV in its several forms.

Let's just say I've done some research. I weave all of this into plausible story lines, especially when it portrays bonding and concern within the character groups.

 

[Bramblethorn]

Funny... nobody has mentioned HSV-II, the gift that keeps on giving; there is no cure at this point. HSV was the buzzkill in the 1980s among heterosexuals until HIV took the spotlight - HSV didn't kill people.

No cure, but some pretty good meds that reduce severity and transmissibility. (IIRC, one of the side benefits of all the work done on antivirals for HIV.)

Although it's very unlikely to kill somebody on its own, herpes and many other "minor" STIs does increase risks of HIV transmission, because it's easier for HIV to get through irritated/blistered membranes.

However, mRNA technology developed for CoVID may be closing in on a cure for HSV in its several forms.

Yeah, it's going to be fascinating to see all the things that come out of that. The one that has me really excited, non-STI, is the possibility of a mRNA vaccine for malaria. That would be huge.