square peg,round hole

[alisonwunderlnd]

Ok.I am a Bisexual female.I have friends from every walk of life imagianable.I accept everyone as they are and I wish others would/could do the same.
I have found that throught the years,a lot of people tell me they don't understand how one can truly be bi-sexual.I am at a loss to explain it and dont really feel like I should have to.
I am trying to keep this initial thread on the shorter side so I wont ramble.lol
I have a lot of gay male and gay female friends .Some say thet get it whilst others say they dont believe one can really be in the middle.
Any thoughts?Comments?

 

[sunandshadow]

Well there's always the nice little ice cream analogy - some people love chocolate, some love strawberry, some love both. A lot of bisexuals do prefer one gender or the other, slightly or a lot, but there's no reason one can't like both equally.

 

[none2_none2]

Another way to look at this is that people relate to that which they understand. They may tolerate things that they do not understand, and that should be good enough.

Sometimes we get so emotionally into our own stuff, that it helps to think about a totally different topic and see if that makes your own issues about others a little bit less tense and a bit more reflective.

For instance, if you are bothered because people don't understand your sexuality, try understanding something non-sexual. Lets say you are a person of some religious faith, and you are trying to understand how someone can be 100% atheist. Or the other way around, if you are atheist and trying to understand someone who believes in some kid of supernatural being...

Keep in mind that two people can be of the same background, and totally not understand each other even if they try. I was shocked that I could find people of my same age, same background in the mid-western part of the USA, yet they might as well have been from Pluto as far as "getting" them. That is where tolerance is crucial.

 

[alisonwunderlnd]

i think what I have a problem with is just being unbelieved.It is almost insulting.i dont expect or wish everyone to be on board with the way i live my life.
I understand that not all people can accept others as they are.Hence the world and the shape it is in
I think its just a problem which lies whithin the typical reaction I have been getting.

 

[human_male]

But why should you worry when it's their problem? It's not your problem that they don't believe you or don't accept you.

This probably isn't on the same level, but I don't drink. And back when I used to socialise there were a couple of people who simply couldn't let that go. They got quite agro because they just didn't get it. Perhaps it brought out some insecurity or something. But I never let it bother me because it was their problem, not mine.

If you're cool with yourself, then just be patient with those who have yet to ascend to your level. Smile patiently at them, pat them on their head, and don't say a word.

 

[FeatherNails]

I think most people understand, they just say they don't. Bisexuality sort of undermines the identity of straights and gays (both personal and political) and so it is icky and they don't want to understand.
my pre-coffee two-cents.

 

[alisonwunderlnd]

But why should you worry when it's their problem? It's not your problem that they don't believe you or don't accept you.

This probably isn't on the same level, but I don't drink. And back when I used to socialise there were a couple of people who simply couldn't let that go. They got quite agro because they just didn't get it. Perhaps it brought out some insecurity or something. But I never let it bother me because it was their problem, not mine.

If you're cool with yourself, then just be patient with those who have yet to ascend to your level. Smile patiently at them, pat them on their head, and don't say a word.

I dont really worry as much as I am just perplexed by it i think.Maybe I am rambling like a loon,lol.
I get comments like"well,you will decide on one or the other some day"
WTF?
no...hence I am BI,,,hahah
i agree for the pat on the head thing

 

[alisonwunderlnd]

I think most people understand, they just say they don't. Bisexuality sort of undermines the identity of straights and gays (both personal and political) and so it is icky and they don't want to understand.
my pre-coffee two-cents.

I could not agree more

 

[human_male]

I dont really worry as much as I am just perplexed by it i think.Maybe I am rambling like a loon,lol.
I get comments like"well,you will decide on one or the other some day"
WTF?
no...hence I am BI,,,hahah
i agree for the pat on the head thing

Feel free to ramble all you want. That's what this place is for.

I understand it must be perplexing, when it's the most natural thing in the world to you, and just another part of who you are, yet it's difficult for them.