Sometimes, no matter how hard

[Guest]

you try, there are people that do not like you. There are people that have no interest in you or your words.

I love Lit. But, in the midst of the internet, I find myself regressing back to age 13.You know, that awkward age, when you desperately want people to like you. You try too hard. You want it, too much.

I am pretty comfortable with me. At least, I thought I was. But, no matter the growth, there are continuous times when I feel like a geeky teenager, lurking about, hoping I'll learn the way to coolness.

I wonder. Does this ever cease to happen?

Just a little introspection, shared from my journal to the threads of Lit.

 

[riff]

You sound like me.

I'm right there with ya.

 

[APhil]

Yes, yes, yes.

It will cease when you realize that sometimes people won't accept you simply because they don't know you.

It will cease when you simply start being you for you.

 

[Daddyslilpet]

Yes, yes, yes.

It will cease when you realize that sometimes people won't accept you simply because they don't know you.

It will cease when you simply start being you for you.

Oh my I like the way you put that. Couldn't have said it better myself.

Just be you, who cares what others think.


dixicritter

 

[Guest]

I am me. I like me. But, there is a part of me that seeks approval, validation, and acceptance. I'm not so sure it's a bad thing, riff. We care. We want to give of ourselves. I'm ok. I'm not sad. I laugh, a little, when I see myself trying too hard. I stop and evaluate my feelings. What is it about this person that causes me to revert to old behaviors? Like I said last night, I think I think too much.

 

[markb325]

Raindancer,

Some one told me a few years ago the first person we have to please is ourselves. They explained it to me, that if we are pleased with ourselves, then it makes it easy for others to accept us.

I have already stated that I think you are a very pretty lady well as intellignet and fun and that still applies.

}{ugs

 

[Guest]

MarkB,
Thank you. You are so kind.

I don't want anyone to think I'm not happy with myself. I am, on most days. But, I falter. I regress. It's something within me, it's not the other person's lack of interest.

Hell, I'm just thinking out loud. Ignore the crazy lady behind the curtain.

 

[riff]

You still sound like me.

I keep reminding myself it is a really big world out there, no matter how small it seems at times. Some days are gonna be more comfortable than others. Some days are gonna be really tough, but some days are like heaven.

As a needy literotican male, I've decided it's quite ok to be who and what I am and that my life is my life and when I sleep, I sleep alone in my skin.

I also have a tendency to punish myself far more than is necessary, but little by little... I am getting over it.

I try to believe that happiness is an inside job, but I also understand I am what I am, and it's nice to get that touch from somewhere else.

Don't know if that makes sense. I got a kitten, I got a handicam, and a lot of people like me. But still- sometimes that isn't enough.

I am beginning to wonder about Morrissey. In a song he said, "Never go them, let them come to you...." Sounds cool, but the guy was probably miserable most of his life. I don't want to live like that.

Smile for me.

 

[Guest]

I'm smiling, hon.

People, like you, bring forth smiles.
And, sometimes, my own idiosyncrasies, cause smirks.

We're just fine.

I like to dissect my spirit. I ache for growth.

 

[Dillinger]

It never quite ceases - but we try and manage it. I've often maintained that the opinion of someone I don't respect doesn't mean anything. Yet, still - it does hurt when you see someone, anyone, post something bad, or inaccurate, or ill-informed, or just plain mean about yourself or a friend.

Still - the best on-line philosophy I've learned in the 10 years since first logging on is - "Ignore the Assholes."

As far as being liked. The best we can do is just to be ourselves. And the rest just falls into place.

 

[Dillinger]

You still sound like me.

I keep reminding myself it is a really big world out there, no matter how small it seems at times. Some days are gonna be more comfortable than others. Some days are gonna be really tough, but some days are like heaven.

As a needy literotican male, I've decided it's quite ok to be who and what I am and that my life is my life and when I sleep, I sleep alone in my skin.

I also have a tendency to punish myself far more than is necessary, but little by little... I am getting over it.

I try to believe that happiness is an inside job, but I also understand I am what I am, and it's nice to get that touch from somewhere else.

Don't know if that makes sense. I got a kitten, I got a handicam, and a lot of people like me. But still- sometimes that isn't enough.

I am beginning to wonder about Morrissey. In a song he said, "Never go them, let them come to you...." Sounds cool, but the guy was probably miserable most of his life. I don't want to live like that.

Smile for me.

Well said, riff. *smile* - No wonder I agreed to marry you.

 

[Rambling Rose]

I have a little validation stamp around here someplace. Now where did I put that pesky thing?

 

[Mistress]

you try, there are people that do not like you. There are people that have no interest in you or your words.

I love Lit. But, in the midst of the internet, I find myself regressing back to age 13.You know, that awkward age, when you desperately want people to like you. You try too hard. You want it, too much.

I am pretty comfortable with me. At least, I thought I was. But, no matter the growth, there are continuous times when I feel like a geeky teenager, lurking about, hoping I'll learn the way to coolness.

I wonder. Does this ever cease to happen?

Just a little introspection, shared from my journal to the threads of Lit.

<---Ahh yep, feel 15 here

 

[Calamity Jane]

I do the same thing Raindancer. Sometimes, I think 'Oh god, I hope <insert name here> wasn't offended/doesn't think I'm an idiot. Or, I find myself thinking "Oh goody! They really like me!!!"

I think it's all part of the human condition. We're pack animals, like it or not, and acceptance is vital.

 

[Starfish]

Okay, first of all you are a goddess. You are fun loving, funny and sweet. You are caring and you are a good friend. You are always ready to help if someone needs it, and you are a precious soul.

So, regardless that what you are feeling and experiancing is common for most people, you don't come across as a geeky teen trying to fit in. It seems to me that you fit in really well.

Well, okay, so rationalizations aside, I like you.

 

[MorgaineLaFay]

you try, there are people that do not like you. There are people that have no interest in you or your words.

I love Lit. But, in the midst of the internet, I find myself regressing back to age 13.You know, that awkward age, when you desperately want people to like you. You try too hard. You want it, too much.

I am pretty comfortable with me. At least, I thought I was. But, no matter the growth, there are continuous times when I feel like a geeky teenager, lurking about, hoping I'll learn the way to coolness.

I wonder. Does this ever cease to happen?

Just a little introspection, shared from my journal to the threads of Lit.

I'm 12. A majority of the time. I've spent the morning here reading your poetry darlin, beautiful

 

[AzureAngel]

I don't believe that it ever comes to an end - the desire to be accepted by a new group. It's difficult to be patient and wait for people to be won over by you, and even more difficult when other people -aren't-. It's the rather crappy way of things. *Chuckles.*

Loving yourself helps a ton. Being able to provide for your own happiness, in a general sense, also helps greatly. So does having a strong support system. But, I think it will always be there, for me. The problem of adjusting myself to others if I'm not careful. I'm too political like that. Gah.

 

[Guest]

Something hinted, inside myself, that I wasn't alone in such challenges.
Thank you all for sharing your insights and wisdom.

Rose, stamp me on my left ass cheek. I wanna be reminded that you love me and my ass.

Dilly, I gree with you. It sounded better coming from you, than in my mind. Thanks, as always.

Mistress, ack, I think 15 may have been worse for me. I bet your 15 was full of pubescent angst and experimentation.

PCG, I am suprised. You always seem so together and cool.

Fishie, I love you.

Lady RainMaker, I bet you were an old soul, even at 12. Thank you.

Azure, I totally get the adjustment issue. I continuously check myself. You rock.

 

[freakygirl]

you try, there are people that do not like you. There are people that have no interest in you or your words.

I love Lit. But, in the midst of the internet, I find myself regressing back to age 13.You know, that awkward age, when you desperately want people to like you. You try too hard. You want it, too much.

I am pretty comfortable with me. At least, I thought I was. But, no matter the growth, there are continuous times when I feel like a geeky teenager, lurking about, hoping I'll learn the way to coolness.

I wonder. Does this ever cease to happen?

Just a little introspection, shared from my journal to the threads of Lit.

Good god.. are we twins or what? This is exactly how I feel most of the time.

 

[Guest]

Maybe so, FG!
If we are, and I like you so much, that must mean I ain't half bad.
Seriously though, I don't see wanting to be liked as a weakness. It's a liability for disappointment, though.

 

[April]

Does it ever cease? No, sadly, it doesn't. I'm still fidgety and awkward, ill-fitting here. I didn't know so many others feel the same. Most of the time, I feel totally alone. And on the outside, watching the other kids play. You know how it is? When you're the last picked for a team in school. Yeah, that's me. Standing on the sidelines, watching. Heh.

 

[Wiggles]

Rambling on...

Yep, yep.

I deal with a lot of self doubt sometimes. The only way I've learned to really accept it is by admitting to myself that no one really notices. When I used to go out, I'd be so nervous. Do I look good in this? Is my hair ok? But then I thought, how much do I actually notice what other people are wearing? The chances are great that I don't elicit that much attention. Therefore, I don't need to worry about it too much.

I use the same technique here and elsewhere. It's probably a screwed up idea, but it works for me.

I'm pretty comfortable with myself, I'll admit I'm pretty down to earth (border line boring). And that's ok.

I envy those who truly seem unaware of their effect on others. Wouldn't that be nice? Just to walk around all day sure of yourself?

I'd like to believe that if you're a good person you'll be fine anywhere. Self awareness is a good thing, I think. It leads to self improvement.

 

[Rambrat]

Thank God!

I'm not the only one...I was beginning to question myself. But you know what...makes me feel alive!

When this happens, I try to remind myself of all the other wonderful people here at Lit that make me feel so good!

I'm not needy like riff and dill...just traumatized from youth...lol.

 

[J.B.]

so

is there like a book we have to sign or something?
Just count me in .

 

[SlowHand89]

I understand what that's like completely. If I've been on Lit for an extended period and I'm feeling really down, I know it's because I'm looking for a connection and not getting it. It's like being at a party with no one to talk to. Makes me feel thankful I'm not a teenager anymore and that I don't have to go through that everyday.