Sexual compatability

[glynndah]

Not even if you like it?

The hotter, the better. And I did say please.

 

[rgraham666]

The hotter, the better. And I did say please.

A woman after my own heart.

To quote one of my best lines from one of my stories, "What sort of a gentleman would I be if I ignored such a polite request?"

 

[Penelope Street]

Be warm.

Be ready.

Frequent repetition is imperative.

The rest we'll improvise.

Purrrfect!!!

 

[Lucifer_Carroll]

I'm not really a "you need to do this" type of guy. My list is more of the quirks I have that the partner would have to be moderately okay with.

1. I don't make noises. It's not a won't issue, it's a can't issue. I have never once made a peep around orgasm. I'm a quiet guy a lot of the time and it's carried over. Any noise I could make would sound fake and I don't think either of us would like that.

2. Don't worry about pleasing me. I like giving pleasure and I can pleasure from giving pleasure and bringing happiness. I don't often "need" to come and sometimes I don't really even want to.

3. Tell me what you want. I am willing to do most things to bring you pleasure (minus those outside my personal code of ethics) and will do so if you tell me what they are. I'm not a mind reader and I'm a bit oblivious, so cluehammers are needed.

4. Working off 3, I will not give violent sex. I don't care if you gain great pleasure from whippings, throat jobs, being called filthy names, and thrown about like a rag doll, I don't feel comfortable doing those things and if I forced myself I would be feeling incredibly self-conscious and bad the entire time. It wouldn't be sexy to say the least and would bring neither of us pleasure by the end of the day.

5. If you're going to be polyamorous, let me know and tell me when you've slept around. Also recognize that I will be old-fashioned and monogomous, even if you are not.

6. Tell me when you want sex. I don't push sex, so I need to know when you want it so that I can indulge you. If I don't hear anything or receive any impetus, I will assume you are not in the mood and will leave you alone. Just give me a nudge and I will devote to you my full attention.

7. I am chivalrous and like giving things. If you don't like being given random things, then you will grow to hate me. I can't really help it as I enjoy doing nice things for people and really like to give. It's a personality defect. I also have a bad habit of holding open doors and giving flowers and gifts on dates. Sorry.

Yeah, that's about it...
I feel a bit pathetic being the only one with an instruction list rather than a lover list. I feel a bit like machine wash, tumble dry.

 

[ABSTRUSE]

I meet everyone's except Dar's. I think that means I'm easy.

Easy is so harsh, loose is better.

 

[sophia jane]

Easy is so harsh, loose is better.

Right. I'm loose, then.

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Right. I'm loose, then.

that's what I like about you.

 

[sophia jane]

that's what I like about you.

And here, I thought it was just my cookies.

 

[ABSTRUSE]

And here, I thought it was just my cookies.

I like your cookies too.

 

[Dar~]

I meet everyone's except Dar's. I think that means I'm easy.

You only don't meet mine b/c I don't know how I like it with a woman. You are my dream girl everything would be a learning experience

 

[sophia jane]

You only don't meet mine b/c I don't know how I like it with a woman. You are my dream girl everything would be a learning experience

 

[kendo1]

A dream come true...

 

[Liar]

Damn, some of you guys are picky.


However...

Be warm.

Be ready.

Frequent repetition is imperative.

The rest we'll improvise.

That's more like it.



Pretty much all I demand is someone who...

...wants it now and then
...who don't take sex dead serious
...and who won't be dissapointed by what I have to offer

There I can pretty much sign to LC's list. (with exceptions noted below)

1. I don't make noises.
Same here. Unless to get a laugh out of you.

2. Don't worry about pleasing me.
Yep. I'm easily pleased.

3. Tell me what you want.
Definitely, and don't ever assume that there are thinbgs I should know. I won't get annoyed if you point out obvious stuff from time to time.

4. Working off 3, I will not give violent sex.
Same reason as #1 - because I suck at it.

5. If you're going to be polyamorous, let me know and tell me when you've slept around. Also recognize that I will be old-fashioned and monogomous, even if you are not.
Here we seem to differ, LC and me. If you're going to be polyamorous, go right ahead. But we're through as an item if you do. If you're with me, you're with me. Or else you're not. (No, I'm not a control freak. We're talking real, romantic love and sexual intimacy. That I want exclusives on for the duration of the relationship.) On the up-side of that, I'm stubbornly faithful back.

6. Tell me when you want sex.
See #3.

7. I am chivalrous and like giving things.
Kind of. But I'm also thoughtless. So gifts will maybe not show up on occations that you think calls for gifts, like our 20 week anniversary or such grand occations, but rather when I'm on town and come think of you randomly.


Condensed...there are really only two things that you'll need to know about me in love, sex, friendship or a game of table tennis:

1. I offer no odd flaours. But my vanilla can be pretty damn tasty.
2. I might dissapoint you, but I'll never hurt you.

#L

 

[Willow Rain]

1. Be willing to be authentic, bring all of yourself to my life and my bedroom. Be brave enough to really be who you are.

2. Don't be lazy, sexual ruts are death to intimacy, be willing to play, explore. Boys that kiss you, grope your tits and then want to stick their dicks in you, should all be locked in a room together and forced to fuck each other.

3. My whole body, including and expecially my brain is sexual, you should know that. I know that about you.

4. High libedo, I have one and need that as a healthy match.

5. Find sex fun.

6. D&s, interest, Tantra, serious plusses, possible deal breakers if you had no idea at all what I was talking about.

7. They can't be afraid of what, how or the intensity of what I want.

8. Flirty is important too, and funny. They gotta make passes and initiate, because I do, and it's more fun when that is balanced.

9. Love making me come. I will surely love making you come too.

 

[cloudy]

I feel a bit pathetic being the only one with an instruction list rather than a lover list. I feel a bit like machine wash, tumble dry.

I thought it was lovely.

Yours too, Liar.

 

[Dar~]

Yeah, that's about it...
I feel a bit pathetic being the only one with an instruction list rather than a lover list. I feel a bit like machine wash, tumble dry.

I thought yours was sweet and actually considered applying for a job. I would love to be wooed. My problem is I don't want to always be saying . ."honey, I want to have sex." I want to be told that someone wants to have sex with me, that I am attractive. When I am always asking or innitiating I also end up doubting my attractiveness. Why else would no one tell me they wanted to have sex with me?

 

[sophia jane]

I thought yours was sweet and actually considered applying for a job. I would love to be wooed. My problem is I don't want to always be saying . ."honey, I want to have sex." I want to be told that someone wants to have sex with me, that I am attractive. When I am always asking or innitiating I also end up doubting my attractiveness. Why else would no one tell me they wanted to have sex with me?

That's me, too!!! That was one of my biggest issues with my ex. I had to initiate and I ended up feeling terrible about myself for it.

 

[Lucifer_Carroll]

Why else would no one tell me they wanted to have sex with me?

They respect you too much to think of you as only a body for sex.

Personally, I would feel sad if my partner's worldview was shaped by sexual attractiveness. Attractiveness is in the soul, in the mind, and only lastly in the body. You are attractive and don't need some neanderthal telling you he wants to fuck you to know that. I know that's the system my lovely counterparts have set up, but I don't ascribe to it and there's a few other renegades on this site who don't either.

 

[impressive]

Attractiveness is in the soul, in the mind, and only lastly in the body.

Amen! (However, it's still hot to be told when someone wants to take me against a wall.)

 

[Liar]

My problem is I don't want to always be saying . ."honey, I want to have sex." I want to be told that someone wants to have sex with me, that I am attractive.

That goes without saying. Initiative as a one-way street leads to a dead end. But the same condition apply there as everywhere else: Many guys are oblivious. It is never obvious that it's the wrong occation. So practice patience and turn unwanted initiatives down with a smile, not a frown.

 

[LadyJeanne]

You are attractive and don't need some neanderthal telling you he wants to fuck you to know that.

I like knowing that my favorite neanderthal thinks I'm hot and sexy and sometimes just can't wait to get his hands on me.

 

[Dar~]

I like knowing that my favorite neanderthal thinks I'm hot and sexy and sometimes just can't wait to get his hands on me.

That is my point. I like to know that my husband still finds me attractive and sexual. I feel attractive and sexual all the time but I like getting a response to it from him. It's not about depending on someone else to make me feel worthwhile its about knowin gmy passions and desires are reciprocated. If I am always innitiating, I would wonder if I am not asa ttractive to my husband as I used to be. Telling me you want me is a huge turn on for me and is sure to get you a great response.

 

[Wildcard Ky]

Mines pretty easy. I don't have a lot of preconceived ideas, I'm more of the go with the flow type.

1. Don't be inhibited. Let go and follow whatever urges or desires hit you. Just be yourself and don't pretend or hold anything back.

2. See #1.

 

[Halo_n_horns]

Rob's thread made me start thinking about what I look for in a sexual partner because I'm beginning to realize that not everyone I like will please me in bed (and vice versa).

So...what I look for in a sexual partner:
must not be afraid of sex or sex play, but be open minded and see it as fun
must be willing (and able) to have sex on a fairly regular basis
must love oral sex
must be able to listen to the answer if you ask what I want
must not freak out if I have trouble coming
must initiate sex/sex play equally. I hate being the one who gets things started everytime

Bonus points if:
you like to spank
you get turned on by tying me up
toys don't intimidate you
you bite
you pull hair
my nipple clamps don't freak you out


So...what about you?
(I hope I'm not the only one who's so demanding)

edited for Penelope

I'm failing to see why anyone wouldn't want you for a sexual partner...

 

[sophia jane]

I'm failing to see why anyone wouldn't want you for a sexual partner...